Don’t ask him just do it. You give birth its your child all he did was give you the sperm. You have to push the baby put of he leaves you get left with the kids
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Whatever plan you both agreed upon is in fact the plan you should stick to. It was decided ahead of time so you wouldn’t have to come up with a plan at a time like this. It’s done, no need to worry about it.
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Give your child 2 last names.
I’m sorry but your husband is an idiot for wanting two children from the same two parents to have two different last names.
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I know a woman who has four sons and every one of them has their mothers maiden name as their middle name.
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That’d be weird as hell to not have the same last name as your full blood biological sibling imo
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Use your fathers last name as the middle name? Just an idea idk what I would do in that situation
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Last names are just last names. Maybe name your son after your dad and use the husbands last name.
But I’d be angry too if my man changed his mind at last minute after we agreed on something.
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my kids have 5 names in total. First, 2 middle and hyphenated last name. I dont have any brothers with the family name and hes the youngest with his. But we hyphenated because i didnt want to cause confusion or make things difficult to prove they’re my kids or his:woman_shrugging: was never a problem
I’m in a similar situation. My last name will die with my father. He had 2 girls. My sister has my moms maiden name so she chose to give her son my dads last name which is my last name. I refuse to give up my name. Im a proud woman and proud of my heritage. My husband was totally fine with that when our son was born we weren’t married and I have an older daughter by a different man who has my last name. We agreed to give them all my name so they all have the same name. We are married now and I hyphenated mine and his. Our kids all carry my last name. I would hyphenate your kids. Be proud of both names
Keep it as planned. It’s understandable why he wants it changed, but it’s disrespectful when you guys already agreed.
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If you feel that strong about it don’t cave, stand your ground otherwise he will think you will cave over other things
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Honestly living with a hyphenated last name can be really difficult and it doesn’t really carry on the name because your child bloodline is his father’s last name so just get the child one last name
Our first had only her dad’s last name when she was born but we had a legal name change to hyphenate it since I never changed mine and now it matches her little sister (hyphenated.) But that doesn’t sound like it could be an option if he isn’t wanting to hyphenate the second one…
I’d do the hyphenated name like you agreed but I’d change your daughter to the same by deed poll so all the kids have the same name xx
I grew up with a family (married) who had two girls and a boy. The boy had the fathers last name and the girls had their mother’s maiden name. I’m not really sure why they did it that way because it wasn’t my business to ask, nor anyone else’s. What you do with your family is for your household only.
Like you, I would be upset that something that was previously agreed upon was now being rejected. I’d speak to him and see if you can reach another compromise if he’s not happy with the current agreement.
My kids legally have my maiden name and there dad last name hyphenated and they only use there dads last name on everything thats not legal documents
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I personally would keep it the same as your daughters (if they have the same father) I get your reasons but personally I would like to be the same as my siblings … or maybe suggest changing both or all to the hyphenated name? Good luck with your decision and congratulations to your family on the new arrival 
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I don’t blame your husband.They should carry HIS name.
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Your kids should have the same name.
Make your maiden name your middle name instead. I know people do that to keep the family name going.
Why on earth would you by choice make your kids have different last names?! That’s nuts to me, truly…
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You have to realize that once you have hyphenated a name it is no longer the name… Which means you are no longer carrying on said name… And it’s a little messed up meaning your first child could grow up seeing that you showed favoritism to the other child/children
We had this situation as well, I kept my last name. One of the kids has mine and one has his. I work in child care and this is actually super common practice now. I thought my family was unique in how we did it but over the last few years I have cared for many children whose parents have done the same.
I gave all my 3 kids the same middle name so there would be no fight about names. I think you should give all your children the same last name to be fair. People may think your 2 kids are not related either because diffrent last names.
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Its a name, harm to a marriage isn’t worth it. They are still your family and his family birth line, that didn’t change with a name. But if agreed in the beginning he should honor it.
We used to worry about this all the time. In our family, we had mostly girls. So my mom’s generation, there were three boys and three girls. Out of those three boys, only one uncle had a boy. He was the last of that surname for that particular line. Out of my generation, we had a total of 12. 9 girls, 3 boys. My one cousin is from the uncle that only had the boy. Another is from an aunt. Then my brother who was the last boy of that particular line of Bartlett. I had thought about having my kids, at least one, carry on the Bartlett name. However, my ex husband and I had one boy and three girls and my son is the last of the particular Hampton line. Thankfully, my brother had a son and a daughter so the name was carried. I decided that the surname wasn’t really that was important. Yes it carried generations worth of possible honor and dishonor. But what was important to me was carrying on the names of those that I loved the most that were worth honoring in a way that I could. So my son may be the last Hampton but he holds a very honoring name. I named him Edward Michael. This is for my dad, Edwin Michael; my brother, Joshua Michael; my ex father in law who passed, Edward Lloyd; and my grandfather Bartlett, Edward. Don’t put too much into the surname. There are other ways of carrying on family. If you want the surname in there, put it as the middle name. It’ll be a win win no matter what.
My husband and I hypertension our 1st child’s name (we weren’t married and she’s a girl, 2nd child was a boy i said from the start girl we hyphenate boy could have his, we got married 3 weeks after our son was born i have a daughter who is almost 3 with our last name… we have 3 kids before some mine some his so there’s alot of names but there just names
A good friend of mine had the same problem. She was the last one in her family with her name. So she hyphenated. Her daughter had her father’s last name, and their son has her last name.
Ok so hear me out… I understand married adults doing it to the fullest. Kids however not as much because of when they get married. So it’s a long ways from now obviously before he would get married BUT, say his is hyphenated A-B. He meets a woman and they get married. His now wife can be in a pickle. If she wants to do the same as you did and honor her father, her last name would be A-B-C? Or she would have to just pick one of your son’s names? Then which one? Or does she just take your son’s full last name but then everyone thinks yours is her maiden?
I know yall agreed, but I’d be thinking long term on how it will affect his life down the road. Just a thought. My personal opinion would be for kids to have their fathers last name. Give them a middle name after your father as a compromise is what I’ve done previously. But not every cookie is from the same cookie cutter 
your children’s birthright is their fathers name, your daughter carries it so should your son, they both have the same parents they should both have the same last name.
My sons middle name is Savage which is my maiden name. It won’t get passed on with him but it didn’t feel like it ended with me either. I’m totally happy with it and after explaining the reasoning to my kids when they are older it may become a family middle name to be passed on.
I would keep the last name your husbands only and make your maiden name his middle name or give 2 middle names. In the end I understand you want your fathers name to go on but in the end it is your husbands child and I’m sure he wants his child to have just his name. Also I wouldn’t want my kids wondering why one has a different last name than the other, they should have the same.
All the people in my family are female so my last name would be lost so after marriage I decided to keep my last name and my son took my last name
Your husband wanted his last name to be carried on, and was okay with your last name being carried on but now wants to change his mind. I would not back down on this.
Do as you wish to do your filling out the birth certificate it was already agreed on your husband will get over it
My niece doesn’t have any brothers so the name ends with her and her sister. However, her 1st daughter has 2 middle names, both grandmothers, daughter #2, is named after her dad, Toni, and her 3rd daughter has her middle name is her grandfather’s last name.
I have a female cousin that named her son our last name, although we have a lot of males with the last name so are not in danger of the name dying off for a long time.
Go ahead and hyphenate. Doing so takes NOTHING away from him but in NOT doing so it takes away a part of YOU. He needs to back off.
I caved and have hated myself since but my child is no worse because of it
Your daughter only has your husband’s name so you didn’t “stick to your gut” with her. That probably set the precedent that his name is what will be used. Now you are having a boy and the last name is an issue. If this 2nd one was a girl would she be getting just your husband’s name? I think all the children should carry the same last name and since you already didn’t hyphenate then that is the precedent you set. However, each family makes their own decisions just because I would want all the kids to have the same last name doesn’t mean that is what works for others. Since you asked for opinions, mine is that since you didn’t do it for the first one then you don’t do it for any of them.
My parent were not married when they had me and my father want his last name to be my last name which my mother didn’t want. So they compromised and now my dad’s last name is my middle name and I have my mom as my last name
both kids should have the same last name, whatever it is. it’s the family name now.
How about a suggestion… agree on a first name, then you may place your maiden name as his middle name, and fathers last name as childs last name…
In my eldest child’s case, as an example-
“Kay” Eaton Bailey.
You should stick to the plan. But another option is to use your maiden name as his first or middle name
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So give him first name then your name as middle then husband last name and of fight move on
Then when she gets married, she’ll have 2 hyphenated names if she keeps her maiden name. Example, Anna smith-jones-brown
Hyphenated name as was agreed on or use your maiden name as his middle name.
Both parents last name appear on the birth certificate
My youngest daughter has her two grandmother’s maiden names as her middle name.
Make your maiden name his middle name…lose the hyphen.
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Four names. Then let your husband pick. Either your way or my compromise.
Should’ve just gave them both the hyphenated names
Don’t you want you children to have the same last name?
give him the name you go by…and the same as other child…PERIOD…
dint create confusion among ur children if its two manes its two names…
To the husband - you make a deal with a person you claim to love, you stick with it. Do you really want your children to have different family names?
Would your maiden name work for his first name? Middle?
Why can’t your maiden name be your child’s middle name? I know so many people who have given their kids the mothers last name as the first. Stick to what you agreed upon. Your husband is being ridiculous.
I wish I would have kept my family’s name but I pray my daughter my only child carry’s on her last name
My friends daughters middle name, is her mother’s maiden name: ie Lisa Smith Jones.
a promise is a promise and should be kept
Sounds like you are making a mountain out of a molehill
Just give the new one the last name like you did the first one.
My aunt gave her boys 4 names 3rd name her last name 4, my uncles. Then was they could choose how they wanted to carry them on. Her daughter only had three cause her name would change anyway.I thought it was a good idea.
Do as originally planned. He will just have to adjust. Why should you be the one to compromise.
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