My Husband Expects Me to Be Home with Baby 24/7 While He Works and Has a Social Life: Advice?

Relationships
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QUESTION:

"How many stay-at-home moms have working husbands who come home to tap you out and spend the last couple hours hanging out with the kids and giving you a little break?

Whether it’s for you to take an uninterrupted bath, or send you for a massage or help clean up a bit or maybe just take the children on for the last couple hours before bedtime?

I’m so appreciative that I don’t have to work. And I’m not high maintenance (according to him), I don’t spend money on salons and getting my hair or nails or feet done, I don’t buy makeup or name brand clothes, I’m on Medicaid, and food stamps, and my daughter is on Medicaid too.

I get so many nice hands me down clothes for her (for free) from friends that wanna just give it to the next mom in need. He doesn’t pay my phone bill either. I just stopped breastfeeding her at two years old (about 3 weeks ago).

I don’t have a life, and my daughter is with me 24/7 since birth. He gives me an allowance of $150 a week. He keeps me out of his bank and goes out 5 times a week to play pool in bars.

He’s had more of a social life than I have since way before our daughter was born. We’re not wealthy and live in a crappy trailer. I don’t need fancy stuff but I’m just wondering why he thinks it’s more important that he has a social life and that I should be staying home 24/7."

RELATED QUESTION: How Can I Make My Husband Understand I Need His Help?

TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

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“No person should go out five nights a week without their other half. Kids or no kids. By all means, have your own friends and stuff but your away time should never be greater than your home time. Doesn’t he miss his kids? My husband is hands on the second he gets home. Sounds like something fishy like cheating. I’d talk if it doesn’t change, bye.”

“I’m sorry, an allowance? Are you a child? I would be doing my own thing, there’s no way I’m sitting up in a trailer 24/7 while my man goes out and lives his life and ignores his family at home and thinks it’s okay by providing me with an “allowance” that is the craziest thing I ever heard. I would be packing me and my child’s stuff and getting our own place.”

"So, aside from the $150, what do you get from him? Not even medical insurance apparently. Why do you need someone who doesn’t seem to care for you or his kids?..

… Did he not want children and is trying to escape? Do you know he is in fact going to the bar & not having an affair? Why are you putting up with this? How old are you? Do you have any family or friends who can help or has he isolated you? (This is a form of abuse.) What would happen if you got up before him on his day off & just left him alone with the kids for the next 24 hours? Leave him a note that it’s your turn to get out & then turn off your phone…

… See if you can get some online counseling to help your self-esteem, and start planning a life on your own. He will have to pay child support and take the kids on “his” days after divorce, usually one weekend night and every other weekend. If he keeps not taking them or not being a good dad while he has them, look up what you can do. Women’s centers have great info. Read up on what you need to do & see how to get him to pay for your divorce lawyer."

“Financial abuse is real and you don’t deserve to be a second rate person. Ever.”

“My husband isn’t a household chore kinda guy, but will gladly be home with the kids for me to have a night out with friends. Find some mom friends and take your daughter and go hang out! Don’t let him keep you trapped in the house.”

“You gave a long list of how you are not that expensive to upkeep monetarily. You have allowed it. And the answer is very simple. YOU MAKE THE CHANGE. Set money aside and make it so that you go out once a week alone. You can’t make him want to be home and you definitely don’t want to force him. Now, maybe in the beginning you both fulfilled a role, he works, you take care of the kids. But now, you’re evolving and you want to change your role. So change it. Don’t ask permission, you’re a grown adult, you simply make plans and leave. No comparing or telling him “you get to go out so I get to go out” tit for tat nonsense. Genuinely plan a night to go somewhere by yourself. See what his reaction is. Is he accepting? Because I can almost guarantee he will not be and then you can get to the real root of the problem in your marriage. You can pick up a per diem job and work only once a week. You need to decide what you want to do and make it happen but it begins with you and he will have no choice but to accommodate you.”

Have a response to this question? Leave it below to help a mama out! Or leave your own question and get responses from real moms!

READ ALL ANSWERS BELOW:

1 Like
2

He would be gone that is not a relationships. He wants to control you

1 Like
3

I would have left him, he sounds controlling.

2 Likes
4

He gives you an allowance? Yea, no. Leave, file for child support and spousal support and I bet your “allowance” from that is a lot more than you’re getting now.

1 Like
5

Take that $150, hire a babysitter and take yourself out to dinner with some friends once or twice a month.

20 Likes
6

I don’t get free time, my daughter is now 2 years old, my husband works and supports us, which is more than what I could even ask for, so I’m thankful about it. But he does spend time with his daughter and helps me take care of the house when I ask. So situation is different

7

Run im sorry but literally ruuunnnn he should be coming home to you and helping with whatever you may need he should be there to watch or keep an ear out for your child so you can shower or relax in the tub… if he wants a night out fine but you get a day or night out also and if he has money to go ot like that he has money to take better care of yall. He wants to be single so leave him the only thing he does is help financially so id go to government help and get on your feet. He needs to grow up

5 Likes
8

Financial abuse is real and you don’t deserve to be a second rate person. Ever

5 Likes
9

Ever since the pandemic happen and I work from home and do school and have become my kids secretary. So I have been with them 24/7 since march 18th (no ones counting lol) once my husband gets home i take a nap or have an hour to myself in my room and he goods dinner and finishes hw with the kids. It’s great to where we share responsibilities. He had to stay home once and said he couldn’t do it so he helps as much as he can. He should give you some time since I believe it’s so much worse to stay home now that I do it. When we both worked in the office we would take turns. It sucks he wont take your feelings into consideration. Momma needs a break too. If he is controlling money he’s trying to control you. Hang in there.

10

And i am a stay at home mom of a 4 yr old and 2 yr old my husband works full time and on call every other weekend but makes sure I dont get overwhelmed and im not pregnant with twins so he is helping a little more. Just 2 weeks ago him and his friend took all the kids ao me and his wife could go halloween shopping. There were times it was tough for us financially but he never went and blew money when i couldn’t even blow 10 dollars on our kid

2 Likes
11

It’s not gonna change… accept or move on.

5 Likes
12

Wtf girl you need to kick him to the curb oh he’ll no why are you even putting up with that

2 Likes
13

Because you allow it. Change it.

4 Likes
14

Nope. Boy bye!! I do stay home with my kids 24-7. I virtual school my kids so they are home with me 24-7. Momma needs a break every now and then and that’s just what I’m getting tonight!!

15

Im a stay at home of 9 kids. Im always home with them bcuz my fiance works long hrs BUT he always helps me out if i need it. If i need to do shopping he hands me his card no problems. If anything take that $150 and get a babysitter for a few hrs and go do something. I recently started getting my nails done just to have time to myself.

3 Likes
16

No person should go out five nights a week without their other half. Kids or no kids. By all means have your own friends and stuff but your away time should never be greater than your home time. Doesn’t he miss his kids? My husband is hands on the second he gets home. Sounds like something fishy like cheating. I’d talk if it doesn’t change, bye

10 Likes
17

You need to get a job that’ll get you off state assistance and get you out of the house

18

Im sorry, but WHY is everyone’s first answer LEAVE???

She asked for ADVICE. Not to tell her something she obviously isn’t ready to do…

Here’s my two sense:

Im in a kinda similar situation, except I started my own business because I felt too scared and guilty to ask for money or help… so i FULLY support my baby and myself. Im also the ONLY one who cares for our baby… BUT, I recently got a bit of balls and communicated with him.

Here’s my advise, COMMUNICATE FIRST!

Sit him down, CALMLY tell him what you feel, see and need. Express that you will not be ok with how things are anymore and you need more.

Listen to his response, then go from there.

If he cannot listen or communicate, then think of your options.

If nothing changes, you’ll have your answer.

But things COULD change…

Try to communicate… you have no idea how weird it is when you DO NOT raise your voice to a man or threaten them with leaving constantly or when you are just calm. It freaks them out that you’re not being super emotional. They realize shit got real!!!

19

Sounds like he’s paying you $150 to be his babysitter and maid :thinking: doesn’t sound like a guy who wants to be your husband or your kid’s father. My husband keeps saying that if he could chose he’d rather spend time with our son than do anything else :sweat: I’m really sorry you’re in this situation

20

As a husband limiting bank accounts and giving you just an allowance is financially abuse

4 Likes
21

He sounds like a piece of shit

22

Tell him exactly what you need from him and if he doesn’t comply he has to leave

1 Like
23

O hellllll friggin no! I would of lost my shit by now. Fairs fair right…stand up for yrself!

24

An allowance? No. What you allow will continue.

Best wishes.

1 Like
25

Quit letting him control your life and find a life of your own. That isn’t living. Not worth it

1 Like
26

Get out of there…he is controlling you emotionally abusing you. It takes two to make a child men should be coming home to take over while you get to go the bar for 5 nights

3 Likes
27

I told my hubby if you want a relationship with your child it starts at day 1 not at age 5 or whatever. I was a stay at home mom till my oldest went to school but marriage is a team work. he’s living in the past… think about what you need and maybe walk away

28

My husband isn’t a household chore kinda guy, but will gladly be home with the kids for me to have a night out with friends. Find some mom friends and take your daughter and go hang out! Don’t let him keep you trapped in the house.

3 Likes
29

Nope, sorry I wouldnt put up with that kind of mistreatment. Stand up for yourself and tell him what YOU want. $150 a week is going to seem like peanuts compared to the child support he will be paying.

When I ask for my husband’s debt card he hands it over no questions asked. Yeah I just use it for gas and diapers but that’s not the point. Its OUR money. I am homeschooling three kids on middle school and taking care of a baby while he works from home. I cook him breakfast lunch and dinner on top of doing nightly feedings and working a part time job. Yeah 2-3 times a week I will go out for a coffee and that’s fine with him. You deserve a little freedom

3 Likes
30

Nope thats not healthy. Financial abuse is abuse and Its a control Tactic. Does he get pissy or insulted if you want to go out or work?
It should never be about what he wants. You should be happy to. If only one partner is being fulfilled by their life or partnership then it needs to be Reevaluated, deal breakers and expetations need to be restated and stick to your choices.

1 Like
31

Any man who gives his wife/partner a allowance isn’t a real man and needs to be kicked to the curb! :100:

4 Likes
32

Speak up for yourself

33

An allowance? No maam. Thats controlling.

2 Likes
34

Sounds like he has you right where he wants you he can control your every move you are to dependent to leave and deal with his Bull shit and he goes out and does what ever he wants you need to get so thing straight if he’s going out every night even at all to the bars girl he’s probably cheating !! Either way it’s a dirt bag move separate bank account ever you literally have to get welfare to live and he’s out playing NOPE go get section 8 get a house find a day care get a job got threw you local resources center and leave his ass in the dirt !!

35

I get 2 hours a week to myself. Been that way for 7 months now.
And my husband is not trying to give me any extra money and I’m not having it. I’ve been making him super uncomfortable until I win this one. Because I budget and he doesn’t. Its the first time I have never not worked. So major head buts.

36

Ooh you got trapped.

1 Like
37

That is such bullshit. That is not ok.

38

Sounds like he controlling you and you are allowing it to happen. Leave!

1 Like
39

You gave a long list of how you are not that expensive to up keep monetarily. You have allowed it. And the answer is very simple. YOU MAKE THE CHANGE. Set money aside and make it so that you go out once a week alone. You can’t make him want to be home and you definitely don’t want to force him. Now, maybe in the beginning you both fulfilled a role, he works, you take care of the kids. But now, you’re evolving and you want to change your role. So change it. Don’t ask permission, you’re a grown adult, you simply make plans and leave. No comparing or telling him “you get to go out so I get to go out” tit for tat nonsense. Genuinely plan a night to go somewhere by yourself. See what his reaction is. Is he accepting? Because I can almost guarantee he will not be and then you can get to the real root of the problem in your marriage. You can pick up a per diem job and work only once a week. You need to decide what you want to do and make it happen but it begins with you and he will have no choice but to accommodate you.

3 Likes
40

Excuse me? Did you say husband? No way in hell I’d let any man treat me like that. Sounds like he has complete control over your life. You definitely need a life of your own outside of being a mom & wife & I would definitely let him know that.

1 Like
41

He obviously has another life

42

Are these men not like this before kids and marriage? I mean there are red flags that pop out with men/women if this sort. Regardless he’s abusing his position as your husband and frankly it’s imperative to your mental health to get out and socialize with other adults. My advice is leave. You can try talking it out, but my experience with these types of men have never shown me that they are capable of being any different.

43

Sounds like your being emotionally abused and what’s with partners giving an allowance I’ve heard of this too often this is not okay. Your partner’s should be sharing everything including watching the children…

44

Your choice. You just have to square away all the things needed in order to be able to live the life you want. This may take some time.

45

Get a sitter and go out with him to play pool or just watch… My husband and I do everything together :heart:

46

Not okay but you have to decide to stay or go, most men don’t change.

1 Like
47

I’m sorry, an allowance? Are you a child? I would be doing my own thing, there’s no way I’m sitting up in a trailer 24/7 while my man goes out and lives his life and ignores his family at home and thinks it’s okay by providing me with an “allowance” that is the craziest thing I ever heard. I would be packing me and my child’s stuff and getting our own place.

7 Likes
48

He needs to get out or you leave…that is not healthy for you or your daughter

1 Like
49

That’s why I got myself my own job and found my own sitters

4 Likes
50

Sooooo sorry you have a man like that. Instead of going out he should be trying to give you a better life

2 Likes
51

working and leaving him behind would be more beneficial in the long run

3 Likes
52

Id throw a little of that 150 toward a babysitter once or twice a month and go out without him

7 Likes
53

Get a job, meet with friends, put her/him in daycare.

1 Like
54

Oh HELL TO THE NOPE!

2 Likes
55

So, aside from the $150, what do you get from him? Not even medical insurance apparently. Why do you need someone who doesn’t seem to care for you or his kids?

Did he not want children and is trying to escape? Do you know he is in fact going to the bar & not having an affair? Why are you putting up with this? How old are you? Do you have any family or friends who can help or has he isolated you? (This is a form of abuse.) What would happen if you got up before him on his day off & just left him alone with the kids for the next 24 hours? Leave him a note that it’s your turn to get out & then turn off your phone.

See if you can get some online counseling to help your self esteem, and start planning a life on your own. He will have to pay child support and take the kids on “his” days after divorce, usually one weekend night and every other weekend. If he keeps not taking them or not being a good dad while he has them, look up what you can do. Women’s centers have great info. Read up on what you need to do & see how to get him to pay for your divorce lawyer.

4 Likes
56

To the people saying “not okay” or “are you a child” or “he’s abusing you” or putting your husband down… completely disrespectful.
Granted, if your husband is controlling and abusing you then leave the situation. If you’re just upset that he isn’t helping you out and offering to give you some free time, speak up for yourself. Most men are just oblivious. My husband is an amazing man all around, but does forget that I need a break sometimes too. I’ve let it get to me and we’ve gotten into some heated discussions because I’ve let my frustration boil up for too long. Now, I just bring it to his attention when I feel like he’s forgetting or making his things more of a priority. It’s all about communication! Good luck!

4 Likes
57

An “allowance?” Jesus.

What you allow will continue.

2 Likes
58

save a lil from that $150 and buy his ass a pool table. make his ass stay home. :woman_shrugging:t3: start treating him how he treats you.

59

It may not be healthy, but I raise absolute hell when it comes to this kind of stuff. It’s BOTH of your guys kid and you’re ALSO YOU aside from being a mother. Just like he is HIMSELF when goes out to play pool.

60

He’s controlling you by locking you out of his account and giving you a strict allowance without ever letting you go out while he goes out multiple times a day. It’s toxic behavior and you need to express your feelings to him. If he doesn’t change then consider counseling or trying a separation so he realizes how good he has it with you being at home taking care of the kid.

61

He is escaping from reality! The next time he comes straight home from work have you shoes on keys in hand and take a drive!

3 Likes
62

My man doesnt even stay at home rn because he has work and pur vehicle just shit out on us. So I am 24/7 mom. I dont get to ‘tag out’ i wake up and go to be being momma.
My house stays clean and my laundry done.
I get no allowance, I don’t need shit except my son and my cat, and getting to see my man every few days.
Sounds like you’re complaining about BEING A MOTHER

63

Did you just say an allowance :joy::joy::joy::woman_facepalming:t4:

2 Likes
64

So yeah, shit, all expense paid for your child’s health care!! Go fuck yourself.

With insurance premiums still pay a lot for my child’s Healthcare.

Go fucking work, like the rest of us that have to pay for everything.

65

In what century does he live in lol. Staying home isnt for everyone & in your case I sure wouldnt be ok with it

1 Like
66

Get a job.
Having a kid isn’t an excuse to stop working.
I worked 5 days before having my baby and went back 4 weeks after.
You can be appreciative if you are being an equal part of the household, obviously you are not. You should not have to receive an “allowance” you should be in control or at least present in your family’s finances.
He’s just giving you “shut up” money. So you can keep your mouth shut for when he goes out, God knows for what 5 nights a week.
A happy marry man goes home and spend time with his kids and wife, help her to relax and enjoy his company.
Sounds like he’s looking for whatever he hasn’t lost.

3 Likes
67

Honey, u get more than I do! I have 7 kids. I do litterally everything for everyone. I go nowhere except the grocery store in which I get food stamps for us. No “allowance” here, here I get nothing period except gas in my beat down vehicle to take the kids to school n no more. While he has the job goes out when ever he feels like it always coming back drunk every single weekend. But to him it’s “I pay the bills n keep a roof over your (meaning me) head so it’s your job to do everything” “that’s y u stay home " and " I (meaning him) shouldn’t have to do anything or give u money bcuz the bills r paid n that’s all that matters u (meaning me) dnt need money for anything”

1 Like
68

Because that’s what you have shown him you will do. NOT defending your husband, I’d be pissed too. But you need to talk to him… I would not stand for this, nor would I want my children learning this pattern.

1 Like
69

Financial abuse is a real thing, and you need to get out now.

1 Like
70

Because he has no respect for you, sounds like he is single until bed time? I would not live like that.

3 Likes
71

No Thankyou would I be putting up with this kind of bad behaviour he gets to socialise all the time while your at home looking after the baby he needs his bags pack & kick out the door you deserve better then this from him sounds like he wants to be a bachelor live life like a single man does not good enough in my eyes be a man grow up you’ve got a kid as a for an allowance make him have a allowance so he grows the f—k up is what I do that’s not a man that’s a immature adult some man like you to beg them for money for the sake of your own children that’s f—king ridiculous because of their Hugh ego’s

72

Whether you are the bread winner or he is : your money is my money and my money is your money. I am a stay at home mom I have complete total access to the bank account and savings account. Usually I do the shopping and Bill paying (what isnt coming out automatically) I can get what ever I, our daughter, the house or he needs as long as it isnt an expensive purchase just like he does. If its expensive we come together decide what we need to get and see if its something we can afford to get. The only break I get is when I can go to the store or a doctor appointment by myself. If I had friends close by that wanted to hang out just us I would be able to do it if its what I wanted to do it. He works anywhere from 36 hours to 70 hours in a week so when he is home he does what he can to help with our child. You need to sit him down have an open discussion about how you are feeling and change things.

1 Like
73

He needs to get his ass home and help you after work no mater what and you two do a date night once a week that’s how I would do it

74

why do you want to live like this and set this kind of example for your children?

2 Likes
75

He’s your husband or your owner?

76

I was siding with your husband when this convo started. Like if he goes to work all day then, no , i dont expect him to come home and give a daily break. His work and mine (at home) both need down time. I wouldnt expect him to come home daily and tap me out. Take turns, sure.

Same with the allowance. My husband doesn’t dictate my spending, but i could never spend 150 a week on myself. 600 a month on frivolous stuff, but you don’t buy any new clothes, make up, and you get free government grocery money etc. So where is it going?! Normal people don’t even have that as free spend money. That could be a replacement on your beater car or get out of the trailer save for a house.

The part I would not tolerate is him going out 5 days a week with friends. That’s for single people. You guys both have a lot to reevaluate here.

4 Likes
77

This is the story of almost every mom…do you think everyday stay at home moms get to do the things you talk about :joy: nope :woman_facepalming:t2: you want that stuff…get a job

78

Never give up an income for a relationship ladies. If you’ve really got to, study online, make your self employable for if things do not work out.

1 Like
79

What you allow, will only continue. Period.

1 Like
80

Goes out 5 times a week? He’s most likely cheating and treating you like a babysitter, as for the $150? Babysitting money.

3 Likes
81

Girl time to kick him to the curb you never know how capable and strong you are until you have no other choice

1 Like
82

Make him see you don’t need him or his money by getting a job and if you have to, work while he’s home so he can watch the baby and if he has a problem with it then I’d look into a place if your own. Don’t let him get you down. I hope things work out good for you

83

Maybe find a job and daycare if he don’t like it then he needs to be more attentive to u. My ex husband was the same way ND it sucked my fiance is completely different I run a home daycare ND he helps me occasionally when he isn’t working. But he also dose super cheesy things like candle lit bubble baths while his sports r on and cleans way more then I do I don’t have a social life but he makes its easier.
Just have a talk with him or go get a job
Job leads to friends and social life (and u can pay for daycare with ur money and u don’t need an allowance)

84

I understand with no break. How it sounds is you all are just dating? He isn’t the father? It seems as though you are already a single parent. Might as well just be one

2 Likes
85

Well I will be getting divorce due to this and the fact he thinks he can do whatever he wants

2 Likes
86

is he your boss or partner?

1 Like
87

Honestly, you may want to think about getting a job, even a part time job and establishing your own credit. I’ve seen too many women rely solely on a spouse only to have something happen (spouse leaving or dying) and then left to scramble trying to figure out how to support themselves. Without credit, this can be very difficult.

Protect yourself and your child by slowly building credit in your own name should you ever find yourself in a position without your spouse.

1 Like
88

Why is he making the decisions? This should be a partnership. Children need both a mother and a father. Mom and Dad should have a social life with friends and with each other. Have a discussion with him letting him know what you need and getting his input on how to make it happen. If he chooses to not spend time caring for the children to allow you to socialize then he can pay for child care while you spend time with friends. Sometimes men feel they are inadaquate at parenting very young children and if this is the case he may need your encouragement to spend more time caring for the children. If he does not work with you to ensure your needs are met the he does not truly love you.

10 Likes
89

I can relate in some ways. I’ve been a sahm mom to 3 boys for the past several years. I am largely on my own with them, except when my husband or mom is able to help on a occasion. Its been very hard and I once had no social life. I finally figured out that I would need to get social with other moms. and bring the kids along. I am now with Mary Kay, but like you i don’t get my hair or nails done, i don’t care about things like that. What wouldn’t fly is the fact that your husband goes out up to 5 days a week. That is absolutely wrong and he should be called out for that. If he still thinks you should live this way after you discuss it with him, i would walk right out that door.

4 Likes
90

As women we feel like we’re stuck we have no one to turn to that’s how you can tell that they are controlling and it will never change but once you learn how to do reverse psychology on them they don’t like it I’ve been there and done all of it

1 Like
91

He does it because you allow it. What you allow is what will continue. Put your foot down, set boundaries. If they aren’t respected, then leave. Don’t threaten with it, and then not do it. Mean what you say, be intentional. This won’t change until you stop tolerating it.

26 Likes
92

Why why why…
Why are you not talking to him to solve this.
Why are you just allowing this.
Why would you stay home and collect welfare when you have $.
Its time to grow up and raise your family.
If your not part of the solution, then your are part of the problem.
Figure it out together with jobs and daycare. Time with each other and with the toddler.
Or by your self. You cant have it both ways and it sounds like you both are playing both ends.

6 Likes
93

At some point, staying home 24/7 is not so healthy (as far as I’m concerned). Men always think it’s great, it’s cool. I’d get a part time job (if no minor kids who needs baby-sitting). Exposure, talking to other people is healthy. Financially, it’s good. You don’t have to ask him to buy let’s say, a dress, shoes, or make-up. No. I need to get out there once in a while. Good luck.

94

I was a SAHM for 19 years and my hubby went to the bar every night after work. He got home around 9 most nights. I thought it was a good life. Then I took a part time job and the whole world opened up. Lunch with friends, my own money, a sense of belonging to a community, being proud of my job. I just flew…

95

Who died and made him God. You better grow a backbone or yours is going to be a long lonely life. I dont remember what your child is, but either way, you and hubby are not showing how to respect the other gender.

96

Get a job and respect yourself. This Is 2020 stop relying on a man that doesn’t give you access to his bank account and is out drinking 5 days a week. You and your kids would be much better off to be rid of this b*******

97

You need to focus on you and your mental health! Its not right that he expects you to stay home 24/7 while he gets to get out and work and then go out 5 nights a week. Absolutely not! A marriage is a partnership. He needs to be putting as much effort into yalls kid as you do. He needs to be considerate and put you first than his own needs and wants. Especially when his needs and wants always come before yours. I would either speak up if not leave. That is absolutely not fair one bit

98

That’s abuse. Their his kids too. You deserve time out too. An at home Mom wears many hats and deserves to be important and cherished. As a grandmother’s advice unless he’s willing to respect you he ain’t worth a damn. It’s time he respects you as a partner or goodbye.

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99

Leave, get a job and get a life. NO MAN or WOMAN for that matter has any right to tell you what you can and cannot do. Red flag waving honey, it’ll only get worse with time.

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100

He doesn’t want you to go anywhere because you might catch him & his girlfriend out together. Try treating him the way he treats you see how quick he leaves. One way to get rid of him. Good luck & only you can change your situation.

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