He needs to get over himself. You are not his property that is at his every beck and call. People are busy. They miss phone calls.
That’s your problem right there, you’re explaining yourself.
Tell him to Go Fuxk himself, if he has a problem with you not answering the phone he can take his phone and shove it up his ass.
He sounds honestly? Abusive. I don’t care if you were purposely ignoring him because you just worked a full shift and you wanted peace a quiet, or if you were doing house chores with the music on, you did nothing wrong and he sounds like a controlling abuser. Sorry not sorry.
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Ummm thats narcissist behavior
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I have to say from experience, that this is controlling behaviour and is not ok. I really feel you should get out, this is only the start, then they isolate you from friends and family. He is already causing you emotional distress. Please get in touch with a women’s shelter and or lifeline. You need support now. It is not your fault. You deserve better. 
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It is common curtesy to take calls from your other half. My daughter does the same thing to all of us and it does make me mad
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Maybe he’s the guilt one cuz he doesn’t answer your phone calls he’s worried your doing same thing wrong that he’s doing its like he’s telling on himself
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So when you don’t answer- he thinks your doing what he was doing when he didn’t answer.
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Control freak sadly!!
Abuse isn’t just physical.
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My husband gets mad at me when I do not answer my phone: Thoughts?
I’d never answer his calls again lol like you said you have kids & a house to care for! Let him throw his fit. He’ll be fine
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It sounds like he has something to hide and is judging you by what he does.he might have someone else and thinks you do as when you call him and he doesn’t answer he is probably with the other person,and he thinks you’re doing the same.I’d be turning my phone off and telling him to bollocks
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He is controlling wants to know where you are all the time. Some men having affairs do this so they don’t get caught out. I hope not. Maybe have a think about what goes on around you.
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Narrsasist… Is a good thing to read about… Just an opinion …not accusation… But always good to know a personality…
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I don’t get how after 8 years you haven’t communicated this to him? Like okay he’s controlling or whatever everyone is wanting to say, but 8 years??? Come on, there is clearly way more to the deal? Communication is the problem, not the answering of the phone! 
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You shouldn’t have to drop everything for his call especially after that long of a relationship. Tell him to pull his panties out of his crack and calm the F down. You’re a busy lady. It’s not the end of the world tell him to stop over reacting. Plus if it’s that dire why doesn’t he answer all of your calls.
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if there’s no trust and you don’t belong to somebody who is insecure you have enough responsibilities in your life and now you have to babysit a little kid no way that’s just investing time on wasted time
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Show him your schedule and then ask him what time he would like to schedule in his phone calls and if that doesn’t leave you time to cook supper he can pick up something up on his way home.
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What other controlling traits does he have? Theres nothing worst than walking around on eggshells all your life. In constant defense mode and the anxiety overload if you miss a call. I feel for you. Feel free to msg if you need to vent. I have been in your situation x
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Tell him your busy if he blows up ,let him have it!
Tell him your daily schedule and if he can handle it Have him take a couple off days from work live in your shoes!
I do agree border line abuse.
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My husband used to he like this and I was the same anxiety over missing his calls until one day I’d just had enough and I lost my mind over it and told him exactly how I felt and how he made me and that I’m a busy mum now he doesn’t do it so often but when he does I have ago back hope this helps a little x
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He may have trust issues or he is guilty of something.
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It’s borderline abuse, his anger towards you not answering the phone is not right at all. The anxiety from the stress of missing his call is unhealthy. Talk to him about his behavior it needs to stop
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He needs to get over himself. His insecurities are not your fault
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Get mad at him like he does you when he doesn’t answer and see what happens
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Uhmm check his phone see who else he’s calling…
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Omg @ 1 st I thought this was going to be a joke ,I keep reading & no girl its for real
- Keep ur eyes & ears open & ur mouth shut…( ull think me one day . been married to the asshole now 19 yes may, but he do pay bills , I make lil $ pay my cell phone & upkeep on my car. I don’t give a crap . I guess since baths ,etc u have children …don’t know ur situation but maybe over dinner mention he works, u work, etc . u say if u call & I don’t answer …I’m busy , don’t keep calling I’ll call u when I get a sec same for him , but also say if u don’t hear from me n her try again, no problem. And tell him to kiss ur ass he know where u at , u home & busy & tell him if he needs u that bad come n person. Stand up for urself, but n a respectful way. Remember this. " u got to give respect to get respect".
My mama always told me that not to do violence, use kindness…its hard but if problem continues, this will work I guarantee it personally 110% .take a minute out on the way to bathroom or even on it call him. If he answers great speak a min if not call right back. If no answer then & voicemail comes on say I wanted u to grab something from store, anything hell I’ve even called his phone so many times when he would answer I would say damn I done forgot what I was going to say…anything…remember kill em with kindness.
If that don’t work then he’s cheating & only calling u to c where u r at so hell know how to travel…back to 1 the asshole is the one that told me to keep my eyes & ears opened himself 22 yes ago and I’m like yeah I know, but I did & boy did I put 2 & 2 together about 4-5 years later. Then I opened my mouth & told him detail & detail he never use names but info eventually went into my ears, I saw through my eyes the story , & told it to him I got him @ his own game that time.lol do what u got to do if he still fuss then sit on couch do whatever carry ur phone on hip don’t do nothing but hold ur phone when he don’t have a clean pair of drawers to put on r a rag to wash with & says ??? Say honey I’m waiting on u to do it I can’t do nothing so tell him to fix u some icecream when he come back that way please . lol I’m serious don’t give n like that it took me 16 yes to finally tell him to kiss my ass, & I don’t give a damn if he needs a maid ,I was his wife & was tired of being his maid & further more he didn’t pay enough he told me to my face well I pay all the bills & I said yeah I know that & thankful & I do try to help out when I can. And looked at him n his face & said yeah whether he was with me or not he still has to pay his bills , I had somewhere to go my daughter house , sister . can u live with urs ? Hell naw so shut the hell up & do it itself.
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Sounds to me he’s the cheater. He gets mad because he thinks your on the prowl looking for him and he’s thinking he’d gonna get caught. So he needs to know where you are….
He wants to control you, but you better not give him the same attitude if and when he doesn’t answer his phone though…Sounds like to me you are kinda afraid of him…Judging by your having anxiety all day if and when you miss his phone call…That is not normal!!! Tell him, if I don’t answer when you call, I’m busy, and I’ll call you back as soon as I can. Period!!! Good luck and be safe!!! I don’t like his temperament at all, and find it scary!!!
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This is abuse af, please be careful and get help.
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uh…answer your phone:woman_facepalming:
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My husband gets mad at me when I do not answer my phone: Thoughts?
My fiancé gets super upset when I don’t answer my phone as well, but he makes it a point to ALWAYS have his phone on him and answer no matter what. Even at work. If he won’t be able to at work (he’s a lineman and climbs poles) he will make a point to text and say “hey I won’t have my phone on me I’ll get back to you ASAP if you call”
I’m a hairdresser and have my hands in color and water all day. So I talked to him and told him if I’m not in color or water, I’ll answer. We kind of made a deal that if it’s an emergency, he’ll directly call back after I don’t answer, that way if I have 2 calls in a row from him it is an emergency.
We have 2 kids and he does a dangerous job so I think he just worries I won’t answer in an emergency.
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Honestly, if he expects you to never miss his calls then why is he ever missing any of yours? This is definitely not normal and it is controlling behavior.
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Talk to him and ask why he gets so upset when you don’t answer the phone, explain calmly that I was busy and I didn’t have the chance to answer right away and I apologize for that but there’s no reason for you getting angry for me I suck at answering the phone I’ll tell myself I’ll call back in a minute and I have adhd so a minute to me is 6hrs to normal ppl😂 and my bf understand that if im busy or not answering and it’s important blow my phone up.
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That’s rediculous (of him)… I miss my partners call all the time, prehaps I’m in a convo on the school run or generally just missed the call because my phone wasn’t next to me. I call him back as soon as I can and he does me, seeing I understand if he misses it he is OBVIOUSLY busy at work. Like you state you work have children, cook do laundry baths…
Try explaining that although your at home and may have “finished” work your not sitting drinking tea waiting for him to call, just as sometimes he may miss your call, and although at work he is currently in the middle of something and sometimes so are you… Ask him what he expects… for example let the pasta boil over, or leave the children unattended in the bath… Just so you can answer the phone?.. Explain this isn’t possible and he needs to except that and not make you anxious of the fact he might call and making you make your phone a priority… He doesn’t get to put this burden on you anymore… Good luck
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This is very controlling behaviour, let him know if you don’t answer you are busy and will call him back when possible. If that’s not good enough tell him you’ll have to block his number until he understands this 
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From your husband’s point of view… due to a lot that has happened I also struggled with this. I would go into a panic whenever I couldn’t reach my husband thinking the worst has happened …
Almost like overthinking something simple like a missed call.
I wouldn’t freak out on him for it or anything… but maybe that’s the case with him as well?
Try talking and figure out where it all comes from 
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Maybe set up a time to speak to each other about half way through work day. Then you both are ready for the call
Or…maybe he has a cell phone addiction. So many do now days. 
Sounds like he has some trust issues, maybe from past trauma? Maybe you could try being supportive of him doing some therapy to explore the reasons he has trust issues.
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There does not ever need to be a fight. It takes two. If he wants to have a tantrum over this, let him do it while you are in the other room doing something else. Most of my family hate talking on the phone, so we don’t have a Pavlov response to a ringing phone. But if we hear it ring twice back to back, we check because then it may be important or an emergency. You might try something like that. Or you can simply say that you will be happy to sit and focus on your phone in case he calls but he will have to do the chores that you do. But I would be crystal clear that your days of anxiety about his calls are OVER. His need to be able to reach you IS NOT more important than your need to do your day without worrying about a freakin’ phone. Just saying.
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I think the simple thing to do is to get some ear bud’s, that way it’s in your ear and you can get your calls. I don’t look at it as being over controlling for your husband to want to talk to you, some people get worried when they can’t talk to you the way I see it is be glad he’s checking in, when he stops it’s time to worry.
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Seems very odd …maybe he is guilty of something
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It could definitely be his anxiety. Especially if his employment has anything to do with the public. He may see some things and doesn’t know how to tell you?
I was like that with my husband. I would freak out if he wouldn’t answer. We talked and he already knew it was my anxiety. It’s a work in progress
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You TELL him that you don’t HAVE to answer his calls, that you are busy and he has ZERO right to get upset at you for missing his calls. You tell him he doesn’t get to be angry about it again
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This isn’t normal. How you wish to handle it is up to you, but it’s not normal or healthy.
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Do not listen to people ppl e splitting out venom against your husband calling it abuse etc.They are our to break your relationship
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My boyfriend I had used to do this and he had secrets
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How do you ladies find and put up with these type of man???
I can’t even begin to imagine being anxious bc I missed one of my husband’s phone calls! Like what??
Knowing how busy I am, he’s lucky if I have time to answer one throughout the day.
Start letting these man dominate your world. Speak up and stand up for yourself.
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I work overnight full time , four kids, clean ,cook , doctors appointments he can suck it up… My husband gets mad , I don’t care , if I don’t answer send me a message , don’t blow up my phone unless your dying… He just has to go to work and come home eat and rest 
Sounds like a man with a guilty conscience and he’s taking it out on you.
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Hes abusing you. And he knows it. Maybe he hasn’t hit you… yet. Although I find that hard to believe.
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I’m gonna be the devil’s advocate here. When I call my husband and he doesn’t answer the first time, I’m fine, but if I need to get ahold of him for something time sensitive or important and he doesn’t answer multiple calls (like when I was in labor with our second child lol) I get increasingly worried. The more worried I get, the more upset I get. I start thinking of all the things that could be wrong that would keep him from answering the phone. Accident on the road. Accident at work. The worst scenarios will run through my head until he finally answers, and then I instantly get mad that I spent all that time worrying to death and he was okay. 
I used to blow up over it, but now that I’m older and have a better handle of my anxiety, I just text him and ask him to call me when he has a spare second because my brain is doing the thing again and I’m worried and just want to know he’s okay. If your husband has anxiety, this could be a manifestation of it. I’d suggest talking to him about it in a gentle manner. Avoid accusing statements, just simply say how you feel. He may not even realize that he’s giving you a complex over not answering the phone.
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Is he cheating on you that he needs to know where you are ask him is that why he needs to know then maybe he’ll get off your ass honey you do to much to feel the way you do ask him you’ll see how he won’t get mad anymore
I have severe anxiety. I used to freak out if my fiancé of 7 years didn’t answer his phone. Not because he was doing anything bad but because I was worried about him and my mind would run and think he was dead in a ditch somewhere. If that’s something that bothers him then just try to answer the phone 
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No it’s not Normal…You’re Married to a Jagoff…
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Abuse is not just “laying hands” I am sorry you are going through this. Partners should be a safe place, not this
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He sounds controlling. Why isn’t he helping you with things after work? Tell him good bye.
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He is controlling you. It’s verbal abuse and cUsing you to be afraid of him. Talk to him with a marriage counselor
Or ask the pastor or a close friend to come to your house to speak with him. He needs anger management and someone else to intervene
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Start off by telling him its giving you anxiety all day because that isnt normal which mea s his reactions to you missing his call iant normal either this sounds controlling and a huge red flag for me good luck
Go talk to a professional. Get help. Even if he won’t go do it for you
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He’s abusing you and he has a guilty conscious. Throw him out
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Uhhh, yeah… I was married to a guy like that. Thankful that’s over…
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I would not answer a damn phone call from him until he learns he can keep his temper in check
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Lots of horrible relationship advice on here…you don’t end your marriage for this! Go to therapy or listen to some professionals. Here’s a resource, check out Jayson Gaddis on YouTube or his relationship school podcast on stitcher.
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Bring it to his attention let him know how it makes you feel. If he blows that off or makes fun of or belittles you like an ass. Then do it back to him and see how he feels then. Same senerio with my husband and one day for a few days I gave it back to him just as he would do me. When he came home from work he entered the house all worried and explaining himself…I made him stop talking and asked how he was feeling at that very moment. He basically explained he was almost in full blown anxiety attack mode. I then explained I did not need an explanation, I trusted not only where he was but that he was busy/occupied at the moment and would get back to me. But did instead what he does to me and he understood more clear that day. Now he is an ass so I’ve had to do this over and over again but he understands more if what he is doing/causing when i do it back. Yes I believe I’m married to a man child who can be an ass. Good luck
A fight may need to ensue to handle this… but on your end. Next time this happens…and it will… I would VERY firmly put him in his place. Essentially letting him know that you’re not always going to be available at his convenience, and he just has to fucking deal with it! I say put him in his place… because most likely you’re dealing with a very controlling narcissistic behavior, and narcissist are in reality just wounded children inside. You say it’s over the phone thing but, if you really think about it, you’ll probably notice other ways he’s controlling, but he does it in such a subtle way, that you don’t even notice. Also, that anxiety/fear you feel when you miss his calls… is absolutely his intentions.
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You are allowing his behavior. You should have said something about it years ago. Stand your ground.
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If you have bad anxiety because you worry about missing his call then this is not the only control issue going on here. This is straight up mental abuse. I’ve been there with the worst. Usually a man that has to know where you are and what you are doing at all times has something to hide himself. Talk to him about it once. Do not allow him to treat you like crap and yell and scream at you if you miss his call. Walk away in person. He starts yelling on the phone hang up. Don’t feed into your anxiety. Let him see it no longer will work on you. You alone can stop the behaviors. If your unhappy then your the one that has to do something about it. Men like this usually will never change because they know you will put up with it no matter what. You either change what needs changed to make YOU happy or you don’t. Best of luck.
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If he works nights- he might want to ensure all is well at home. Maybe try to set a time each night to call or text so there is less of a chance for missed calls- or maybe call him.
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If you have been together for years and this just became an issue then he’s probably doing something he is isn’t supposed too
I would turn the table and freak out Every time like he does see how he likes it
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It really depends on what his thought process is when you do not answer your phone. Has there been a history of unfaithfulness on either part? Is he controlling/mentally abusive in other ways? Does either one of you suffer from a debilitating illness? Are your children sickly? There could be a number of reasons why he has this reaction. Mostly, why do you have such heavy anxiety when one of his calls go unanswered. My thought is, if his behavior is extreme anger over something so small, and your reaction to missing his calls is so intense, there is something much deeper going on. History of mental abuse, narcissistic behavior, control issues and or cheating. He’s your husband. You should be able to sit and talk with him to get to the bottom of his insecurities. Unfortunately if there is an affair on his part, you may not have resolution. Do some research into it on your own to find out if this is the root of his anger. Men tend to be sloppy and us women tend to ignore the warning signs. Best of luck to you.
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I can understand your reasoning to a point, Do you ever think he just wants to make sure you are OK? Some day when he is no longer here on earth, you will miss that he calls you
I don’t have anything else to add about how he is acting. I think the thread pretty much covers that, but have you thought about getting a smart watch? Then you are not stuck to your phone and you will know when he calls and have easy access to answer without the inconvenience.
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Tell him to kiss your ass
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Controlling! Go seek help to find out ehy he’s like this.
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A) Answer your phone.
B) Your husband needs to chill.
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You’re going to have to fight about this. He’s not going to let it not be a fight. But it’s worth it because this controlling behavior will destroy your marriage and your sense of self. I suggest counseling ASAP.
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I’m amazed at the amount of women who are making excuses for this behavior. Y’all. Controlling behaving is not okay. It doesn’t matter if he’s anxious or scared or whatever. Abusive men usually are. She’s scared of missing his call because she was distracted making dinner. That is not okay.
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15 years, he didn’t act like that in the beginning, but I was isolated from people. People read up on Narcissist or Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
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My husband gets upset if I don’t answer and the only reason why is because I had a stroke a few years back so if I don’t answer he worries
But that’s when he’s at work
I know his break times so if I have to do housework and I’m in a different room
I always take my phone with me so I will ensure that I answer
Always try to have the phone with you exspecally if you know what time he calls if you don’t know just have it with you then maybe he wouldn’t get so angry
Sit him down and have a talk tell him your feelings and you will try to answer the phone and maybe try to find out why he gets so angry because of it
Good luck
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He has underlying trust issues with you or just people in general, to get yourself so worked up over this on a daily basis isn’t good at all, you need to put your foot down and stand up to him a d tell him to cut it out! Period! What’s next , cameras in your house?
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You need to bring this up to your husband the exact same way you presented it to us. You have to do this when you are both in a good mood and getting along great. In my experience thats the only way for him to understand how much it bothers you
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When he stops calling you’ll know why. He will be calling someone who answers
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You don’t have to deal with that your not a slave. Tell him you will call him back when you see it if it’s ok for him then it should be for you. And if he can see reason than it sounds like he cheating with the cheaters always turn it on the one not cheating because they feel guilty
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Maybe he has anxiety when you don’t answer maybe he is just worried about you If your ok I am the same was with my husband if he doesn’t answer I just figure he’s busy and will call back
I’m more worried about you guys being together for 8 years and you not knowing how to discuss this with him. Communication is such an important part of a relationship. You just tell him exactly what you have told us. Tell him how it makes you feel.
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He sounds like a douchecanoe.
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Someone gave him a hard lesson dear. So what needs to happen is he needs to get past that but you need him to recognize his behavior is wrong and you are not his past.
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Girl leave ! It will never get better ! That man thinks he is in control. Not everyone has there phone on them 24/7 ! If I don’t answer my phone it’s obviously because I’m busy or I don’t recognize the phone number ! Your man needs to chill out !! I been in that kind of relationship and then it lead to him going through my phone and finding nothing but he was GUILTY!! I remember crying because I knew he was going to call me again and cuss me out and tell me he was over my crap !! I finally got tired of it and left !! No need to continue making yourself upset over stupidity!!!
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This is the beginning, leave
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I understand this completely, my husband is a tractor driver so if he’s calling me about something important that needs to be taken care of right away like if he has a doctor’s appointment and needs to notify his boss. What I have started doing is texting him, hey you have an appointment on X for X at X. This usually works. I know he gets annoyed because if I try calling him back he doesn’t hear the phone. Maybe just start texting each other on your breaks. I am a SAHM and I am non stop every day from the time I get up until the time I go to bed and it took him a while to understand this. Kids are so needy but husband’s are sometimes more needy 
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Stand up for yourself and just tell him. If you cannot do this with your partner, he shouldn’t be your partner. Period.
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This is why I don’t own a cell phone. I have a land line that only I answer. If it isn’t answered, I’m probably not at home. I don’t feel I should be available to anyone 24/7.
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He sounds like a cheating douche canoe.
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Start calling him every hour so he doesn’t have time to call you.
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Flip it on him… Call him every hour… Do the same when he doesnt answer… And when he starts questioning why… Well whats good for the goose is good for the gander… I promise he will change his tune once he gets a good size dose of the medicine hes been feeding you…
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I used to be your husband. I have anxiety disorders and trauma that happened to me so when I would call my husband and he didn’t awnser I would literally think, what if he got in a car accident, what if he has been kidnapped, what if he is dead. I know it might sound ridiculous but that’s what I would think. I got better with therapy and medication. I just thought I would give a different perspective.
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This is low key abuse right here. He wants you to be available at all times for him and if you don’t answer it’s going to be a fight?
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