It’s sad but it’s a “him” problem. He doesn’t sound like he genuinely wants to change. He’s out all the time. Doing? Bettering himself? Doesn’t sound like it.
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Do u want 10 more years of BS? Once a cheater always a cheater.
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Kick him out. Document his drunken behaviors and go to court. Don’t expose your kids to that
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You will be surprised at your strength and ease once he gets the message and goes .Xx
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Don’t fall for the guilt trip he will never change. Look at the hurt he had caused YOU over the years though his infidelity. Marriage is a partnership of give and take it is also a contract, promises made, between you both which he has broken many times. Focus on you, the children and your future. Good luck x
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Dude… listen… stop worrying about him, because he obviously didn’t worry about you.
Got a job, save money till you can get out, don’t have a job, GET ONE! Focus on you and your kids ( pretty sure u said u had em ) and tell him to fuck off.
Run for the hills ASAP
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He will do it again so as long as you are ok with that.
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Stay on course with the divorce. Let him drink himself to death. Don’t let his problems be your problems any longer. Stay strong!
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Don’t take him back,they never change
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Divorce. Who cares if he is butt hurt over you finally standing up for yourself.
If he has been cheating for 10 years, he isn’t going to change & you deserve better! He just wants to have his cake & eat it too! Don’t feel bad he made his life what it is!
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That’s good pain, let him suffer with his girl friends. He didn’t want you bad enough to stay faithful and dedicated to your vows. Don’t let his heart ache let you give up what you deserve. He’s hurting mostly because he got caught, not that he did it.
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They always cry when the woman is fed up. Trust me he could not handle the pain if you did what he did to you. Men can not handle the same bullshit they put woman through. Continue to divorce him and let karma work itself out. You take care of you and your babies. Make you happy and continue to show him what he lost💜
Unfortunately he is a serial cheater. He will always cheat on you if you are with him and you deserve better. You are not responsible for his mental health. Though since you are still married, I wonder if you can call the police and have him committed to a mental hospital for threatening to kill himself. You should try that. Because he may need help but it is not your fault. Remind him he did this to himself. Who knows. Maybe mental health help is just what he needs now. They will ask about his alcohol abuse too and try to get him help for that. Win win in my book.
Let his girlfriend have him, kick him out and tell him to move in with her. You move on with your life!
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Girl go on, you kno what you gotta do. He ain’t guna stop.
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Are you planning to live your whole life like that?Most men do not change but try to get help .
You can try therapy, couples counseling, etc; but honestly, just move forward with the divorce. Ask him one question the next time he cries for you back; “Why should I take you back after you’ve spent the last 10 years being with everyone but me?”
HE IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM ANYMORE. Let his “girlfriend” deal with his BS.
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He’s trying to guilt you into coming back, it’s a manipulation, don’t let him!! Seriously, what would you have to gain by taking him back?! He’s forever destroyed any trust you ever had for him, not to mention possibly exposed you to a broad range of STD’s (would be a good idea to get tested btw). He’s betrayed not only you, but your children as well! If he’s genuinely feeling guilty, good!! But don’t think for one moment he won’t run out and cheat on you again! Don’t you dare feel sorry for him sweetie, he did this to himself. Stick to your guns, and dump him as quickly as possible. He’s got to understand that you won’t allow him to treat you like this and get away with it! I would also insist that he moves out. Sounds like he’s got a line of Ho’s on his arm, tell him to go move in with one of them. Him being there is causing you stress, and you need to be able to start rebuilding your life.
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Find a way to move out, and get the divorce. You’re concerned about how he’s doing but he didn’t seem to have a problem possibly bringing home any kind of disease, and had no problem breaking your heart, and trust. He can get over it and cry to one of his girlfriends.
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He’s broken and it’s not your job to fix him, he must do his own work.
Find a way to get your own place. Work on and take care of you and your kids. You’ll thank yourself down the road.
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He’s trying to manipulate you. Stand your ground. Once a cheater always a cheater. I learned the hard way. Listen to all these women. Women know best.
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Um…. Living together in the same home?? That has to be a toxic situation for your kids!!
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Absolutely do not get back together with him in a romantic relationship. He has already proven his true self and his respect (lack there of) for you. This was not a one time, guilt ridden thing. This was a long, dragged out affair (with probably more than one person I’m guessing). He made his decision time and time again. The consequences are his own doing. He made his bed now he lies in it. You and your children deserve better.
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He needs to accept reality…he is not on sister wives. He doesn’t understand the rejection concept. Why subject yourself to STD’s or worse. It’s on him not you. He feels entitled to women, not real good at monogamy. Have him pack his belongings and move on…you can set up child visitation if he sobers up. Do not feel his drinking is bc of you, it was his choice!! Stay strong and enjoy YOUR life, there are new journeys out there.
Sooo, you lost me at my husband has a girlfriend. Go on and be a sister wife. 10 years? You been doing it. Ask him if you can get a boyfriend. You know what you want to do.
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Divorce him!!! he only wants you back because you keep putting up with his bs. and if the divorce goes through, he will have to pay alimony and child support, which he probably doesn’t want to do, because he needs his money to take out his girlfriend he has right now.
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Of course he is now begging for what he once thought had no value. Now you have value? Which is it? Leave him and his drinking far behind. Hopefully that will sober him up so that at least he has the opportunity to value his children.
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Just think about who his main concern is for: serial infidelity = himself, financial dependence = himself, drinking = himself, crying = himself, not getting professional help = no one, not being a role model for his children = no one. There is help for his problems but he is not seeking help, he is seeking a safe harbor from the storm he has created. Be the adult who makes him take responsibility for his actions. In the long term, you will be proud of your decision to divorce.
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and why do you feel sorry for him? His choices have consequences. Let him drink himself to death while crying in a corner. I wouldn’t have any interaction with him until you can get out. Know your worth! Be a role model for your children!
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He messed around for TEN years and that didn’t break his heart? He didn’t want you then. But now you’re trying to leave he acts like he wants you? Nah.
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Until he gets help at least, and stops acting like a 2 year old not getting what they want, I’d stay clear. Don’t know if it’s great for the kids to be living with him, and you may be looking at every possible to leave physically, for the children’s sake if not yours.
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Good luck 
happiness is better without the drama
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Choices have consequences. He knew what he was doing was wrong.
Continue the divorce, get your ducks in a row.
Boot him
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Once a cheat always a cheat don’t take him back if you do he will continually hurt you ,do you really want to live like that he has no respect for you or your children !!!
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Get out any way you can
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So many of these posts are just about shitty husbands that nobody should be putting up with.
Stick to your decision… obviously he made his years ago… should have thought of that long ago when he did that to you. He didn’t care doing it to you, why should you care now how he feels?
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He needs a therapist. If you rake him back with out counseling or therapy it will not get better
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People don’t change except when they want something. Don’t give in!
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Life is short Do you want to show your
kids this is what a man should be like?
You want to waist your good years this way? There are better options and happiness to be found Go to church take your kids, make friends. Love the Lord Jesus and he will fill your heart
with His love and peace.
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Tell him to get the f### out of your life
He’s crying because he is sorry he got caught
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You taking him back will give him permission to do it again. And he probably will! You deserve better than that! Don’t sell yourself short again!
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He made his bed now let him lie in it 
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Typical narcist behaviour they don’t like it when you want out
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Take him back but insist on counseling. Reach out to God & admit we’ve all sinned. Life is too short, believe me.
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Stand your ground and do not take him back. He has been a cheater and always will
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Cheaters always turn on the waterworks. Proceed as planned.
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It may be hard but you need to stick to your guns. He made this happen thinking that he could have you and whoever else he wanted and that you wouldn’t leave so let him be pitiful and he needs to find somewhere else to live cause once the divorce is final he will have to anyway.
I agree with almost every comment her. If he did it for years and just recently had a girlfriend he is going to keep up his behavior. Its not your job to take him back, its your job to heal and take of YOURSELF. KICK HIM OUT.
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Stick to it. He definetly made his decision. He’s sorry now. But when your back it will be the same ol run around.
He is an ex for a reason. Take it from someone whose done it. DON’T
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Nope… next… we all have consequences to our actions… yours should not consist of putting up with someone who has disrespected you the entire time you have been together… ewwww you don’t want that dirty D*@k no no no no
Go to marriage counseling but still file for a divorce. You can always stop it later but at least with counseling, you tried!
You aren’t his mommie. He has a responsibility to his family. Carry your weight. He can carry his
Saying sorry is easy. Doing sorry is not. He needs to make a commitment to change his ways and then consistently demonstrate that to you. There are no quick fixes.
Marriage is supposed to be for life.
Counseling, not ever cheating again for sure . Hard decision for sure
He cheated on you for the 10yrs you were together and had a relationship with someone else in the last year you were together and you are worried the divorce will tear him apart? Why would you even consider his feelings at all. He stays out most of the time, yeah probably at his girlfriends place. Kick his ass out.