Hello, I need some opinions here… I am a mother of three, 13, 3, and a one-year-old. I have been together with my husband for six years. We have the youngest children together; the oldest is of my own. I am starting to get very stressed, frustrated and fed up, no matter how long hubby sleeps, he is always tired, he works (regular daytime hours) and I am a stay at home mum, which we both agreed to since before we had the 1st baby together, so we don’t have to worry about childcare costs. Our youngest still doesn’t sleep all night, and he is still on the breast, he has no interest in bottles, so he wants breast often during the night. I haven’t had a whole night sleep in over a year, so I feel quite tired myself, with all the broken sleep. I try to be understanding, but it’s really starting to bother me that hubby can’t sit down for a few minutes without constantly falling asleep, doesn’t matter if we are doing something together, at his parents for a visit or a meal, he’s constantly falling asleep, at home, he could be trying to feed one of our children and once more, always falling asleep, so frustrated that I have to keep calling him to wake up, which sometimes leads to arguments and… all of this built up over the past year or so, is making me feel like I can’t do this anymore, that I have to go my own way, I know he works, but I take care of the kids the whole day and the little one most of the night, I don’t feel like he helps enough, he’s instantly asleep by the time we get to bed, the baby can be screaming his lungs out during the night, he just sleeps through it all, it’s like he isn’t even there. Also, I have no family of my own to help here; i moved aboard to be with him, all the family we have he is own. Suggestions?
It honestly sounds like he may have something medically going on. He should speak to a doctor asap to have testing done.
See if he will do to the doctor… Get some blood test done. Low iron can make you tired…and I am sure other things can too… Maybe start by taking a multi vitiamn
He may have narcolepsy?
instead of being upset with him, get him to go to a doctor! Falling asleep like you state shows something is wrong.
Does he have a undiagnosed thyroid issue that can make u sleep and tired alot
Is he depressed? He needs to see his Dr.
Sounds like he has a medical condition called Narcolepsy… it means you fall asleep no matter what you’re doing or how much sleep you have, you’re still sleepy.
Have him get tested for narcolepsy
Sounds like he may have a medical condition and needs to see a MD to figure out what’s going on.
Or possibly sleep apnea…
I think he may need some help.
I would have him see a doctor It could be low testosterone or his Thyroid could be out of balance or sleep disorder.
Sounds like ur husband needs to visit the doctor. But I hear u, it’s hard to not be mad when they sleep alot…my husband has always slept alot. I’ve always been the one to do most of the child work, plus work myself…
My partner is exactly the same and he has a condition called sleep apnoea. It’s where breathing pauses during sleep and not enough oxygen gets to the brain to make him feel rested when it’s time to get up. When he wears his mask (which is a trial in its self as according to him it’s not comfortable) hes so much better and rarely falls asleep.
If he does have this it may be frustrating but try and be patient as I’m realising it’s not easy for them either. Good luck x
Make him a doctor appointment. Tell the receptionist to put in appointment note for doctor that he’s falling asleep during daily activities and excessively tired. And, any other symptoms you’ve noticed. Men don’t typically articulate these things well in the office. Could be one of a few things resulting in this issue.
Take a step back and give him some slack until he gets feedback from his physician.
I think you have some misplaced anger! Get your husband to a doctor ASAP!! There is clearly something wrong!!
Sounds like he needs to see a doctor.
Fatigue can be a symptom of some pretty serious illnesses. It’s not normal to be that tired for no reason. He needs to see a doctor and have some blood work done.
Definitely get him to go to the doctor and explain his excessive sleepiness. Get him a sleep study, etc. and if it turns out he’s just being a lump on a log and there is nothing medically wrong, I’d leave. That sounds so annoying. Imagine if you were the one always falling asleep, never hearing the baby cry, etc and everything was all on him. He would NOT be kosher with it. Tell him he needs to go to the doctor or you’re out.
I know it’s difficult, I’m in a similar situation with my husband and our two babies!
He is also constantly falling asleep, blaming it on his physically demanding job and flat refuses to see or speak to a doctor.
If you can, please encourage your husband to seek medical advice. My brother in law used to fall asleep like this, he put off seeing a doctor for years and the day before he was due to see a doctor he sadly passed away in his sleep, he was 29 years old. I won’t go into details but he had a previously undiagnosed and rare heart condition.
My husband still refuses to see a doctor so I have made changes to our diet, so he’s eating and drinking healthier, cut the amount of alcohol we consume and he is working quitting smoking. The next thing for us is to introduce regular exercise as a family, maybe some of this can help? Good luck.
Does he have narcolepsy???
My husband developed a food gluten allergy and he always felt like he wasn’t getting enough/ good sleep. I would try switching up the diet.
Okay, first off. A 3 year old still breastfeeding is gross. They are more than old enough to be off since they should be eating and drinking real food and milk. So cut them off and sleep train them.
As for your hubby, tell him to take iron supplements and chug that coffee because they’re his kids too and you need help
I agree with most posts, this seems excessive and he may need to seek medical attention. I would approach him with this and once he has either been diagnosed or cleared then try and work things out so you both can be happy. Good luck lady
Check to make sure he doenst have sleep apnoea
Sounds like someone I know 
and he had sleep apnea but he was also to tired to put on his mask
Sounds like a medical issue, also comunication… i feel that you need to get the little ones on a schedule, with naptime and nap yourself… also maybe consider the diet in the home if it’s unhealthy you will feel unhealthy…
My husband had this issue. Finally got a sleep test done and it turns out he has narcolepsy. With meds and treatment he’s doing and feeling great.
Girl I am in the same exact boat. My oldest is mine from a past relationship and my husband and I have a 1.5 year old and a 3 month old. He doesn’t fall asleep like yours does tho. But he is tired quite often and so am I and we do argue about it at times… But it sounds like your husband may have a vitamin or mineral deficiency to be falling asleep like that. My husband is a painter (which entails way more than just painting) he truly does bust his ass most days and I know it wears him out. But I’m just here to say I feel your pain momma. We as stay at home mom’s have one of the hardest jobs in the world and only we understand each other’s struggles. I mean the amount of shit we deal with and do on a daily basis on little to no sleep is just astonishing. Even when my husband is home I’m still taking care of the kids and cleaning and making dinner. It’s a never ending job. We work 25 hours a day 8 days a week 366 days a year… But that’s what makes us the badasses we are momma. I know it’s rough. I live it every day too… But these days don’t last forever. We’ll sleep when we’re dead lol I’m sorry you’re struggling with your husband. But hang in there girl.
Could it be a medical problem? Has he had a physical in a while?
Does he have a medical issue? My husband was the same way and we found out it was because his diabetes wasn’t under control. We got it under control and he’s fine now
Seek medical advice.
Can you take a trip with your kids to visit with your family for a few weeks? You need a break and some help. I’m sorry.
I wouldn’t leave because of that. I’ve had issues in the past where I would fall asleep anywhere I sat down for too long and my boyfriend was always mad about it. All it did was make me feel horrible for something I couldn’t control and I hated myself for it. Try to talk to him about seeing a doctor for it to see what may be going on. I understand it’s frustrating but its not something that can’t be worked on and it’s not worth losing a 6 year relationship over and having to split custody with children and everything because of something he can get checked out at a doctor for.
He could have a medical condition!
Sounds like he needs to see a Dr!
Omg! This was my first ex to a T. Throw in loud snoring on top of that. It’s frustrating.
I have no advice but I feel you! My baby turns a year on Sunday! No more than 3 hours consecutively for a year! And 3 hours straight is a damn blessing! I hope you can figure it out!
He needs to see a doctor and you shouldn’t be angry. I get it’s frustrating but what if he has a serious illness causing him to be this way. Bet you’d feel pretty bad for being angry.
I have the same problem.
Get his iron checked, that’s a big sign that something is up wether it be his iron, testosterone or something like sleep apnea.
He might have sleep apnea. Talk to him. A visit to the doctor would be the best thing to do.
Damn I must be lucky my son is 13 months sleeps all night for the most part lol. You’ll get there momma this to shall pass
Narcolepsy? See a dr.
Sounds like he needs to see a doctor
I would schedule him a visit to the Dr! Why leave just because of that? Everyone one is going through something as long it’s not a abusive relationship etc…but just go with him to the Dr or let him go and from there u know what to do…prayers and courage
Has he seem a doctor? Blood work? Depression? Sleep apnea? Thyroid? Age… testosterone?
Get him checked for sleep apnea and have blood work done.
My husband is the same exact way and I am a stay at home mom to 3 kids as well (10, 7, 7 months). However, my husband comes home from work and he takes over with the kids as mush as he possibly can. He also gets up with our son through the night as often as he can. He works 10-12 hours a day and still makes time to help me and give me a break. If he sits down, he falls asleep it doesn’t matter where we are. Sounds like your husband makes a lot of excuses to not have to do anything. I don’t know how my husband does any of it, but his response, I do it because I have to, because this is my family.
My bf is going thru this, and was just tested for sleep apnea. He really needs oxygen, and we are waiting for doctor to call.
Perhaps you both need a break. Sometimes they get tired of our complains and they get depressed/stressed. Or perhaps he needs to seek medical advice for this.
He needs to get a sleep study done. He may have sleep apnea and need a Cpap machine. They work wonders.
My suspicion would be he has narcolepsy and is just as frustrated as you are with it because he doesn’t understand what is going on either.
I feel like us as women are just superior in the way we deal these things men just really aren’t built for it… I know it gets frustrating but u just have to push through I have a 10 year old and me and my SO share a 2 year old and a 4 month old… he work 40 hrs a week I work 50+ n still wake up with the kids and do a better majority of the cooking and cleaning… example last night our youngest woke up at midnight didnt go back to sleep until 330… I wake up for work at 430 n my so went on the couch to sleep in peace …smh … its frustrating but that’s what we are best at …just gotta push through
I understand fully as I am a stay-at-home mom of a 13,8,6 year olds. My husband doesn’t help either. But this seems deeper than that. I think he should see a Dr about always falling asleep even when trying to preform tasks. It sounds like he may have narcolepsy.
Does he have a hidden sickness, need to be patient and see a doctor.
He needs to see a doctor now.
Mine is tired all the time too but seems to be worst in the winter months 
Tell him to get his iron tested…
Praying for better days
Have him get checked for narcolepsy or sleep apnea
I agree i would have him get checked out by the doctors to see if there is something going on. My husband used to get that way until i got him on the same program that i have been on for the past year. I hope things get better mom. I’m here if you need to talk or vent
Does he snore a lot?
That’s a sign of sleep apnea
My son in law would just doze off. He was diagnosis with narcolepsy and my husband would sleep long hours and his was his thyroid hormone. Get him to a doctor. There is probably a underlying problem.
Take that man to the doctor. It could be copd or sleep apnea or some other sleep issue. But it sounds to me that hes not getting the rem sleep or oxygen he needs for some reason and that can cause other serve health issues.
I really don’t think you should throw in the towel over a health problem that he does not have control of right now. He should also get his iron levels checked. Vitamin B12 checked and vitamin D. He needs a sleep study done. And after he gets done with a sleep study. He will Be referred to A doctor that specializes in sleep apnea And will require him to use a CPAP machine. Don’t give up too easily. Try to fix the problem first. Good luck to your relationship and kids.
Look into narcolepsy! That sounds alot like it. Also sleep apnea could cause this. Be patient and discuss the issue with a doctor. Most of it is your stressed from having to breast feed still meaning you arent going to get the same breaks he would. Can family help out and take the kids for awhile?
Hubby may have narcolepsy. Frankly, the youngest is old enough for a cup, time to wean for all to sleep. The youngest is in a pattern of getting awake. It will take about two weeks to change this pattern. Do not get out of bed and do not let the youngest get out of bed. Let them cry it out. This will not damage your child. A full nights rest is good for us all, even little ones.
Maybe he has sleep apnea all the things you describe seems like it’s the symptoms fit.
Has he been tested for sleep apnea? May change his life!
Send him to the doctor, sounds like he can’t help it.
Has he been to the doctor? He could be low on b14 or even depressed. I would have him go to the doctor for a check up and maybe tell them he’s tired all the time they can get to the bottom of it.
Your husband should be checked for sleep apnea. It keeps you from getting sleep. He may have trouble getting actual rest at night. If he snores have him checked out.
It almost sounds like a medical issue or vitamin deficiency. I would insist on a dr appt.
Just a thought… diabetic maybe
I would take him to the doctors it could a sign of a medical issue! Good luck mama
Sounds like my life. We have a 14 year old, almost 4 year old, and a 6 month old. My husband actually had to go do sleep studies because he’s constantly falling asleep. Have him see a doctor sounds like something medical is definitely going on! Also get checked yourself. I found out I’m anemic, so I’m also very tired all the time!
Sounds like he may need to be seen by a doctor. I don’t think sleeping all the time like that is normal.
Could he maybe have an underlying medical issue? I have a couple of chronic illnesses that can cause some serious fatigue. It’s a daily struggle.
Could be sleep apnea. I would have him take a sleep study.
Any way there’s an underlying medical issue, causing the tiredness? Vitamin deficiency, thyroid, epilepsy, ect??
If not - I totally don’t blame you for being so stressed, and exhausted yourself. Does he have a REASON for being “so tired” (what’s his response to you when you ask)?
Maybe instead of getting frustrated, think about your husbands health. That kind of chronic fatigue is not at all normal. He could have narcolepsy or god knows what else. I’d make a doctors appointment for him and see if a doctor can’t figure out why he’s falling asleep all the time
Common sense would tell you he should be evaluated by his doctor as it sounds like a medical issue.
I was married for 16 years and my ex husband had the same issue. He went to the dr and tested low in testosterone. He was always tired. We used to joke that he could fall asleep anywhere. But it’s really frustrating to deal with.
Maybe he needs a check up with a doctor to rule out any medical issues?!
I don’t think that’s normal. He might want to see a doctor and have his iron checked for anemia or perhaps even checked for narcolepsy. Not a doc but it just strikes me as being very unusual. I hope you can get a good night’s sleep soon!
Sounds like maybe he should see a doctor. It’s not normal to be constantly so tired that you can’t stay awake.
Definitely sounds like a Dr visit is needed.
Time to see the doctor. Full blood work done. If nothing comes up, he needs sleep specialist referral. Probably has one or more sleep disorders
Mine was like this. Several tests. Nothing. Guess what. I am doing it on my own now. It’s easier.
He should see a dr. Something could be going on. Maybe iron deficiency?
Sounds like hubby may have narcolepsy goin on or something else maybe find a Dr and get an MRI as for the one year old try introducing sippy cups
Maybe it’s more than just “falling asleep”. My husband works up to 12hrs a day, there was a time where he would knock out instantly which wasn’t regular for him, I started noticing it and mentioned it to him and he would just say he was tired but it didn’t seem normal my instant thought was “okay he is getting over worked and most likely also stressed” so I went out to get him multivitamins for men, would make sure he had a good healthy breakfast and started trying to get him to do more healthy things than before and that always seems to help
My husband is like this as well. He fell asleep at the birth of our child 
lol. We had him tested and he has severe sleep apnea and to this day if he doesn’t wear his mask one night I can literally see the tired in his face. He’s still not an appropriate person to care for infants in the night unfortunately but it took some of the weight off knowing that it wasn’t intentional.
Honestly it’s either narcolepsy or he’s doing drugs.
Sleep apnea my husband same way and he has it bad
Meth.
#problemsolved
Could be a medical issue, he should see a Dr.
Get him to the Dr and get tested. Might be apnea or diabetic.