Not a chance!! Take care of you and your kids!!!
He isnt physically abusive, but he is absolutely emotionally abusive. Smhā¦ he is demeaning you and even if not in front of the kids, it is still quite harmful. Leave.
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This is a rough situation and it makes it extra hard when kids are involved. I would say gather his friends and family and try an intervention. See if he is willing to try to get help and stop. Most good insurance companies will pay for at least a month in a rehab facility. Sometimes it helps, sometimes they go right back to drinking. Please remember at the end of the day drinking is a choice but alcoholism is an incurable disease. Let him know that you donāt want to break up the family but his actions can not be tolerated and even though he hasnāt done anything physical yet,there is a good chance that it could happen and even being verbally abused can scar kids for life. I grew up with a lot of alcoholics, I have seen the DUI fights, the court dates, the āhe/she didnāt mean to hurt usāā¦and worst of all I have seen the 3-6 month terminal diagnosis be delivered and have the person say ok and literally go home and drink themselves to death in a few weeks. I think if you can help him you should try, but always keep you and your babies safe first. Good luck and try not to make any decisions out of anger, deep down his actions are part of the disease and hopefully not his true personality.
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No did you call police to file report. Call them and file
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Run Run Run !!! Do it now while your still young!!!
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Iāve been in an abusive relationship before,I packed kids and clothes and went to a shelter. I have to say I didnāt that quite a few times before I was finally done. mine never changed. he drank himself to death at 41. I will say God can change anyone but unless he does thereās no hope. I stayed longer than I should have. Iāll be praying 
that God will lead you to the right point. I love 
you and am praying !!!
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Kinda the same story here. Giving more chances only keeps enabling them to keep doing what there doing. You and your kids need to be happy.
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Thatās downright shitty of him. If heās done crap like this before then you should know to hide your purse and keys. Fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me. Mental abuse is just as bad as physical abuse. Did he take your car also.
The fact that you gave hin the 1st chance and you stayed told him that what he was doing was ok and you would tolerate his behaviorā¦No more chances
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Get out girl. Itās not going to get better!
It wonāt get better. Divorce him and walk away with your self respect. Give your babies someone to look up toā¦you.
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Run love.
And no more chances unless he has at least 6 months sobriety under his belt.
He sounds possessive and psychotic. If heās accusing you of cheating, itās because heās most likely going out and doing just that. LEAVE. Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical abuse.
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Itās a hard call. If he wants to change he can go to aa and for support you can go to al anon for spouses and others who are stick in this cycle.
This is not safe for you or your children. He needs rehab and he needs it now or you and the kids need to take the car and go.
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Sorryā¦ But that is still abusive. Just because it isnt physical, doesnāt mean he isnt abusive. You and those babies dont need that. Id leave.
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Nope honey get rid of his ass, my mom is going through this & we finally got her out of if course no toddlers involved just 2 pissed off daughters about how he treated her. She even left her own home to get away. Next move is to get his ass out of her house
Well, thatās an easy question! N.O.! You are worth more than that and your kids too!
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My ex was the same way. Best thing I ever did was left. He is now in rehab and wont be around for 6 months to a year.
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No more chances. Make arrangements and get you and your babies back on track. You and the children deserve a much better life please donāt put up with it. Give him a choice rehab or we a threw. And if heās calling you a whore now who knows what he will do next. Please be Safe
Why are you asking? How can you be so demeaned? What if your children see this as normal behavior?
I was with my first husband for a long time he drank like a fish then became abusive I have constant headaches and hearing problems because of the abuse I also have problems breathing through my nose from being kicked in the face while he was drinking I also had my kids taken away from me when they were little I was accused of cheating the verbal abuse is just as bad as physical abuse and how was you going to go to work if he was drunk when he came home
Iām sorry but your kids can tell something is going on in that house and he is emotional abusive and that is ruff .see I went through that my self and I still deal with it my self .you need to get out with them babies now donāt live in this and let your kids live live in this .you will be fine you may not think so but you will .see I lost my house and was homeless with 3 kids and im ok I was determine I would make it and my kids would be good and I did it and you can to
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Well if you want to stay with this person go for it but if not then leave for the sake of your children
No! It will only get worse, not better! Divorce him
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It isnāt going to get any better and I know itās easy for us to sit and say leave donāt feel trapped your kids will see this as normal behavior and they will eventually fall in his foot steps I wish you the best of luck
Yuck. Toxic. Exhausting. Leave.
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Iād say no about any more chancesā¦ It sounds about right for active alcoholicsā¦ finding ways and means to get more. To Start an argument with you over bs so he can leave and drink. Once he comes home in middle of the night( driving, Iām guessing), he takes your purse wallet keys bc now heās drunk and ready to make even more bad choices than the choice to drink in the first place. If he got treatment he could do better IF he doesnāt have other issues- is he a narcissist ? Does he name call or emotionally abuse you or kids sober? Is he a decent provider , dad , husband when heās sober? If you say heās decent sober maybe treatment is the answer if heās ready to admit he needs help. I didnāt read others comments- this is just off the cuff bc my loved one is with an abusive alcoholic narcissist - heās a disgusting person a liar a horrible provider- currently being evicted and he barely ever keeps a job. Did I mention my loved one is preg with her first child? Iām sorry for your situation and prob am jaded by the bf in my loved ones life. Good luck. Reach out to local services in your area re: alanon ā¦
First of all, you already said youāre so done and this is commonā¦ so why are you asking this? You know your answer! LEAVE!
He needs to want to get help in order to BE helped! Abuse is abuse whether itās physical or not. You and your children donāt need this! Your boys donāt need this type of man in their life-it will teach them that itās okay to treat women this way. You need to get away from this man and let him do what he wants. You deserve way better than this! 
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If you have to ask. You already know the answer and are just looking for affirmation. Kick him to the curb. No responsible spouse or parent would steal from them.
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Girl goā¦do you want you boys to treat women like this.??
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abuse is abuse whether its emotional, controlling, physical, or verbal. its still abuse. him taking ur keys and cards is putting u and the kids at risk. so no i wouldnt give him another chance or stay with him. if u continue to allow it itll just escalate and get worse get out now why u canā¦also taking ur keys even if he doesnt take ur car is a type of grand theft auto depending ont he state
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Leave go stay with family
I have been in a relationship similar to this for the past 12 years the only thing is I donāt have any children with him, but when he wanted to throw him a drunk he would fight with me call me every name in the book and accuse me of cheating on him which was quite the opposite. Heās the one doing the cheating. I have left many times in the past to just go back after a few months and do it all over again after many Iām sorrys and Iāll never do it again. I have realized heās never going to change and have left again for the last time Iām done and you need to be also. Good luck figuring that out.
Hell no. Get away and make a new life for you and your babies.
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This is the kind of relationship that my parents have, and my mom refuses to get out of to this day.
Just consider that your kids are helpless in the situation and theyāll be learning from your relationship, even when you think they arenāt paying attention.
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Run. No more chances. The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior.
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Youāre call, but the behavior wonāt change no matter how much you hope it does.
The only way he will change is if he quits drinking!
First thing I would do is make a spare set of keys and hide themā¦ second he has a sicknessā¦ and needs helpā¦if he doesnāt get the help,them I wouldnāt stayā¦I was married to a acholic and I had to leave the marriage cuz I didnāt want to deal with the BS that came with itā¦ I done the Al-Anon for yearsā¦And I didnāt want to raise my son around all the drinkingā¦Your husband needs to get help and if heās not willing then I would leaveā¦
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Aweeeā:broken_heart:
my ex was like thatā¦ He never changed. I found out it meth that made him rush out or cause random fights. The verbal abuse was worse than anything elseā¦ Just leave boo. Itās hard but it gets easier. The kids and you will be fine. We areā:purple_heart:
you got this doll
So when did we start making excuses for the example we set for out children by making excuses for our partners behavior? Emotional and verbal abuse is just as bad if not worse than physical abuse. The fact that the OP made a point to claim that he is not physically abusive makes me question her ability to make sound judgement. He is ABUSIVE. Period. Chances=enabling. Period.
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Itās time to get out take care of yourself and your family!!! Be good to yourself
Physically safe is not the only safe there is lovely. And it starts somewhere, oneday it will be physical.
I say this as someone whoās come from a domestic violence marriage and I said that for years about him never physically hurting our girls.
Now They have ptsdā¦ at 5 and 7. Not because he hurt them, or physically hurt me in front of them but because of the verbal and emotional abuse and the trauma and environment it caused.
And intoxication is no excuse.
Also, most time when someone abusive is accusing their partner of cheatingā¦ it is because they are.
Call someone, a social worker even through legal aid and just out to them the things heās doing. I guarantee they will tell you the same thing.
The taking the car and your cards is really bad.
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I know youāre sad and confused inside, trying to hold it all together. You know the answer mommaā¦
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I would get out ASAP
Married to an alcoholic for 22 years.
Honey, RUN NOWā¦
PLEASE, FOR YOUR CHILDRENāS SAKE
Leave your babies donāt deserve that.
Run and never look back!
Leaveā¦ If he loves his children he should stop drinkingā¦For sure he doesnāt love you or the children. He is giving a terrible example to the children and when they grow up they are going to blame you for staying with him. That is exactly what happened to my sister. May God Bless you and the children.
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Leave him! Your babies deserve better hun. God bless you and your kiddos 
Its time to leave. Hes got serious issues. You need to be happy and feel good. Go start a new life with your kids.
Thats emotional abuse to the max though. Just cuz its not physical doesnt mean its all good. But if you do leave you NEED proof that hes an alcoholic cuz unfortunately he should not have custody of the kids until he stops drinking for good
Hell no his ass would be gone there is a better life then that but he needs to start a fight so he can leave an go drinking not with that shit if he hurts someone drinking an driveling he is so done if you own that house that means you are to because they will sue him should have extra keys an hide your stuff he knows your stuck tell him or just keep living that life. But you deserve more for you an your kids
No, and the environment for your kids is unsafe. You are teaching them that his behavior is ok. What would happen if you put him from your money by removing or hiding your money. The kids are also learning it is ok to steal From mom. Get hold of a shelter and get out.
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Nope I would not stay youāre putting yourself and your boys at risk
Every 9 seconds in this country someone is involved in a Domestic violence situation. Let this sink in. GET OUT! I was raised by 2 high functioning alcoholics and it has negatively impacted my life in too many ways. 50 percent of people raised in an alcoholic home with one alcoholic parent become alcoholics. Iām not an alcoholic. Iām codependent. Againā¦ GET OUT!
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Time to leave l was in your shoes for 8 years l finally said enough is enough donāt let him make you feel bad you take care of you and those babies he can find his own way he got himself this far and donāt feel bad about it he is the one doing this and he takes responsibility of his own actions not you
He is a coward and doesnāt want to be the one to say he wants out so he is sabotaging the relationship. Heās picking fights, doing things he shouldnāt, heās basically telling you to go find another man. He is doing all of this because heās too much of a pussy to just have an honest adult conversation with you and tell you that he no longer wants to be in the relationship. He is literally pushing you to finally throwing in the towel, say that you give up, and leave. That way you do all the dirty work, he can say it was YOU who wanted to end it and heās free as a bird. Heās a loser and not worth your time, love, energy, etc. I guess you could either stay andcobtinue to play his game until you do finally give up (idk if you really want to endure that much bullshit and heartache though) or you could just be the bigger person and tell him that you know what heās doing and if he wouldāve just been a man about it and told you he wanted out, you could have made it happen. But since he is NOT a man, you are forced to be the one to have the conversation and end the relationship. Either way, heās no good, he may not be physically abusive YET, but itās coming, and your children AND you deserve better. Fuck him.
Please leave that bad situation. Let him live his life alone. It will get physical and you will just become his punching bag.Your children should never see that.
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Hell no! Leave, it Will Just continue. He sounds like a narcissist. Get out while you can!!!
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Leave! Take yur kids and go!!
Leave himā¦ my father is a recovering alcoholic. My mom left him about 13 years ago because of his drinking. She left because her children come first. āIf he loves his kids, heāll stop drinkingā isnt a good thing to assume. My father loves all 4 of us kids (now adults) but thatās not what got him to change his life around. If youāre done with the emotional abuse, leave for the better of your sanity and for your two boys.
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Just because he hasnāt been physically abusive that doesnāt mean he isnāt abusing you
RUN
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Hell no! Leave take the kids and go. May God Bless you and the kids.
Leave him! No one deserves to live like that, and if itās affecting you I can promise you itās getting to your kids as well! Kids have a way of knowing with something is wrong with mommy and thatās just not good for any of you!
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No itlle eventually get worse .itās a matter of time heās down to stealing so we now just gotta wait until he starts demanding and hitting ā¦this is way to familiar to me I stay in my marriage 3extra,years before he told me he was tired of hurting me ā¦ if he loves you he will seek help on his on these are conditions to visitation ā¦sobriety
Reading your post reminded me of one of those episodes on ID show.
I would tell him to seek a rehab or meetings.
If heās not willing itās time to do some hard thinking.
Keep your purse in a good hiding spot from now on and get a spare key and hide that too
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He is in love with alcohol. Using any excuse to blame you and get drunk. Bad for you and the kids. Get away so you can think straight. It will get worse.
Thatās mental abuse hun. Find a way without him. Call someone to help you get a new set of keys or at least a ride around. When he gets back have his stuff packed, take back your stuff and move on. Iād be pissed as hell.
No my sister and he never changed and now he died s long while back from drinking and left his 3 girls and3 grandkids without him so I say no
Why would you want to stay?
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Of he is accusing you of being unfaithful you can bet he already has been.prefect you children
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Itās not going to change or get better, I think you know the answer now you need to act on it
I would have been gone the 1st time he did it
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Behavior will escalate, and he IS abusive even if not physically yet. He is causing harm on purpose. He probably wants you to leave so heās the victim. Protect your kids.
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Itās a losing battle, stop exhausting yourself. This energy could be used for useful positive things and ppl. You canāt compete with alcohol. 
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I think you know your answer alreadyā¦ You are clearly worried and unhappy about this situation. That is not way of livingā¦
No. I wouldnāt. After watching similar situations growing up I made sure I wasnāt going to repeat that cycle. Protect your kids from living the kind of lifestyle you are questioning. Think how they feel with absolutely no control. If I were you I would set some boundaries. And if he canāt respect and work towards living a better life with his family then he would have to go. Tell him to get treatment or go.
No get out & take care of yāall. I had both and as soon as I could get out of nursing school it was all!
NOoooooo!!! Do not stay. Hes obviously proven time & time again that he has no respect for your or his children and is drinking & driving, staying out ALL night, Now hes a thief, & has No regards to your job in which you make a living for you & your children. He starts arguments to have an EXCUSE for his Bad behaviour and if he can start a fight then its a manipulation tactic to try & make you think its your fault so he can get away with what he is doing ā¦ because he has been getting away with what he is doingā¦ You & your children deserve better and you donāt have to put up with it. He is mentally abusive and sociological abuse . Draining yāalls life, crushing your dreams, tearing your family apart , and become or becoming everything thst you donāt want your children to be , see or live inā¦ Put your foot down and throw him outā¦ why should you have to uproot you & childrens Life because he doesnāt know how to actā¦ If its not possible then LEAVE and dont liok backā¦ He only Cares about Selfā¦ Hisself!!! Runā¦
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Itās so hard but no I wouldnāt stay in this relationshipā¦he may become violent later and mentally the children will suffer. Go now while children are young for them to adjust better within themselves. But also for your benefit too why should you suffer his problems, by the way whose name is the car registered in if yours report to police that car has been taken against your wishes but if itās in his name well he has a right to keep it. If the house is in your name you keep it change locks in door make sure you let him know he is not welcome here anymore. Help yourself and children think of them . ā¦get a court order for you to have full custody of the children as he isnāt reliable for them.especially with his drinking
Run far far awayā¦ive been with mine for 15 yearsā¦they will not change even for their children!! No matter what they say it is a lieā¦you make sure you and yours do not rely on himā¦move on!! I cannot stress this enough
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Nope , been here done this ā¦
The reason why was been called a how and other stuff is becausey ex was the cheater and couldnāt find anything on me because I was been awesome and the absolute best thing i ever did was move on (afters few years) Iām now happy and married ā¦
The mind games were that bad he even told me no one would want me with children , well they did you can do this to ā¦
Leave. He could go either way. Let him figure that out ALONE. No one is perfect, but YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS BEHAVIOR. His behavior is disturbing and repetitive. The only way to stop the cycle is to remove yourself. Youāre not alone. Iām sure many of us urging you to leave speak from past experiences. Itās not easy and there is a lot of emotion, but it wonāt get better if it stays the same.
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Why have texts for six years!?
I pray that you will walk away and never look backā¦ We can all advise you, but ONLY YOU are capable of making that choice. He may not be hitting you but make NO MISTAKE, He IS abusing you! And your sons are going to view this as normal behavior if you choose to stay. Setting them up to become just like himā¦ I lived it my whole childhood and I now watch my brothers treat people like garbage and get drunk and verbally insultingā¦ It doesnāt stop unless YOU choose to break the cycle. I pray so hard that you willā¦
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No, donāt put up with that. You and your boys deserve better.
He is the one cheating.
Your kids are watching EVERYTHING! Donāt make them think that what they see is what a marriage should be. Show them that you happiness and wellbeing matter, as a mom, a wife, and a women. Leave him asap.
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Dump him they donāt ever change for the better
Please find the courage to leave. I understand heās not physical but mental abuse is just as destructive. And your children are sensitive they will understand an atmosphere xxxx
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Be strong enough for your kids to leave. Abuse is abuse - you donāt want them growing up thinking itās ok to treat people that way or be treated that way.
My man used to be like thisā¦he didnāt do those specific things but pretty closeā¦pretty much that except taking my stuffā¦its been 12 yrs for us on and offā¦thankfully heās 30 now and grew up a lotā¦doesnāt drink anymoreā¦but still when we argue sometimes it comes down to him saying he will leaveā¦which would suck, we have a daughter now too who is less than a yr oldā¦but the last few yrs have been alrightā¦it depends whether reality hits them or not reallyā¦it really kicked Iām for mine when we spent a good yr apart when he realized i wouldnāt tolerate it anymoreā¦like i saw someone said above,it can go either way
Sweetie I stayed in 1 for 13 miserable yrs. Get out while the gettingās good b4 he fās up your kids like mine did
Go. Leave. Never mind you. You understand all of this. Kids dont. Not good 4them. Itās a dysfunctional relationship. Most people do not do this. Yes it happens I know in lotsa families. Want more 4yourself n them kiddies. You n they deserve better. Get your self respect back and leave n create a better healthier way of living theyāre his issues he needs to get help. This is not a burden you or the kids should have to carry any longa a man who does this inc taking your purse n keys has no respect for himself or youā¦you gave him chances, he blew itā¦walk away for the kids sakeā¦it will affect their mental health n view on ā normalā life much more than you realise. Good luck. Wishing you well, wishing you PEACE.
No get out love you will always be
Lied to and will but drink first you deserve a better life been there god bless
They donāt have to beat you for it to be abuse. Calling you a whore is emotional abuse. Taking your $ and car is financial abuse.
Sweetie, my ex-husband started out the same way. Within a few years he was throwing things, destroyed my cell on purpose, leaving me stranded with no vehicle for days on end. It all culminated with him stealing our rent money from my purse (my actual paycheck), blowing it at the casino and on booze and coke, then coming back the next morning, screaming at me that he needed more money to go to work with. When i denied him access to anymore money, he punched the bed next to my head (within 2 inches of my face) and i put an restraining order on him. It WILL turn violent at some point, i can almost guarantee it. Please leave before it does.
Deep down you already know the answer. You have got to leave him. Do it before it gets worse and he messes with your kids minds too. He is an abuser. I know it will be hard to do (from experience) but you can do it. My ex was a mental abuser too but then one day it became physical.
Please be brave and leave , I was in a very abusive relationship and it was hard to leave , financial things hard but things got better and I got my self respect back God bless xxx