tbh he probs wanks off to them ,
Yes it’s Normal & maybe find a way to get him to watch it with you or role play fantasies with him !
Men are going to watch porn lol (maybe you could mention watching with him.) But the ticktock thing is definitely different and inappropriate, in my opinion.
Communicating the boundary and that you are uncomfortable. Everyone is different and every couple is too. Asking him about it and staying calm is good. Also acknowledging that you are feeling worried or insecure and being honest is helpful too
Every relationship is different, my partner and I are comfortable with each other watching porn, I’m also attracted to women so will often show him women I find attractive, we have set boundaries of what is and isn’t ok but what works for us may not work for others if your feeling upset or hurt by this, express yourself feelings, I hope he can understand and respect them and you guys can sort it out but communication about what makes you unhappy is key.
#celebraterecovery check out my pinned post… More then substance abuse!
I’m my opinion it’s a no no no, but I’m all for the good old fashioned love where two people respect each other not just live in a fantasy behind their partners back. Yet to find that myself though
Women are weak in certain areas and men have weak areas… Their maturity when it comes to how they handle their weakness is not a reflection on you. Sadly it does undermine the relationship between you and it will trigger red flags because it is actually unfaithfulness in his heart. You need to decide the track you are going to take because we can’t change people but we can resolve how we can not be mpacted by other people’s choices.
Can we be done with laughing at or calling other women insecure when this kind of stuff bothers them? Aren’t we supposed to be building each other up? It’s NOT easy for everyone to be completely secure in this day in age where access to surface beauty and sex is literally at every man’s fingertips (phone or computer). If you are completely secure in your own skin, that is wonderful… but when another woman is expressing concerns that might expose her personal doubts about herself, try lifting her up or simply just listen to her instead of pointing out that she’s lacking confidence.
It’s normal for men to look at attractive women, they really can’t help it. But it is definitely a problem if he’s doing it a lot, hiding it and not giving you attention. Porn and sex can be addictions and it absolutely can ruin a relationship. Women were blessed with something that men don’t have, it’s called intuition and if something isn’t sitting right in our relationships and eats at us then 9 times out of 10 there is something wrong. And in situations like this, it’s not that there’s necessarily anything wrong with the woman’s views of herself but more of a problem with the relationship lacking in certain areas. Is your husband giving you a satisfying amount of emotional and sexual attention? Does he compliment you and flirt with you regularly? Is he spending more time looking at other women than he does with you?
Whatever feels right to you…whatever feels wrong to you… it’s all up to you to discern how you feel about it.
Personally im not okay with that…at all.
But there are deep reasons and levels and i try to keep that clear with partners.
Does he take care of you emotionally, physically and financially ( if needed) ? Does he treat you with respect ? If you answered yes to all of those things I wouldn’t sweat it at ALL.
It’s natural for men to watch porn, look at other women on social media, etc. Now when this is directly effecting the relationship that’s when it’s a problem. If they are spending money on the habit such as onlyfans/sending payments to these online women etc then it’s an issue for me because it’s more personal. If it’s been discussed that it’s something that bothers you and he’s disregarded and continued that’s pure disrespect and more than likely an addiction. But This is purely a personal view/belief on my end.
Everyone is different, I would talk to him and communicate your feelings to him. I personally don’t have a problem with porn, and my boyfriend and I will even watch it together at times. It’s all what you are comfortable with. As far as the tiktok thing, it could be as harmless as the porn. If they follow him back though, they can message each other. So that is one thing I would look out for; but of course you know your husband better than any strangers on the internet. I mean if you feel like there is something off, definitely talk to him and see how he’s feeling
I go open my husband’s private browser and I can’t even count how many prn pages there are because there’s so many. We also watch prn while having sëx lmfao. Gtfoh with that petty jealous sheet. As long as he ain’t cheating on you I don’t see what the problem is .
You don’t know if it’s normal for men??? lol that’s cute… IT’S A MAN (to be fair & honest not ALL men…slim % though)
It’s individual. The real question is this: will your husband respect your discomfort level enough to refrain? If yes, he is showing his respect for you and your marriage. If no, what else will he not respect?
Everyone has different boundaries & ideas of respect. I personally feel that if a man can’t control his “urges” then you shouldn’t either. Go be eye candy, go shake your ass.
Generalising is a no no, I believe that to some extent it’s not what he should be doing.
In the other hand, men generally share stuff like that with their pals and make jokes about it.
If I were you, of discuss it with him to find out of there’s any problems, shortage of attention that he feel he’s not getting from you.
That’s not an excuse for him to fantasize over other woman, he should rather try and push more from his side to make the relationship exciting.
I learned that, a couple work in percentages, of you give 80% and he gives 20% then it won’t work, if he gives 50% and you give 50% it won’t work ( or it’s not healthy) but if both gives 100% then that’s the healthiest.
I’d recommend you go buy a lekker outfit, with fishnets ( not the ones they use as a gooinet) then make a video and send it to him during the day, give him a few hours to process it and then talk to him about it.
He should include you… anything that gets done secretly is a violation of trust!
Personally I’m okay with men watching p*rn when I’m in a relationship with them. Speak to him & just have the conversation that you don’t feel comfortable xx
It’s normal. My boyfriend has a TON of porn. He was and is always honest and up front about it. One of the most important things is communication. ESPECIALLY when it comes to sex. Im not trying to invalidate how you feel. I get it. I had this issue in previous relationships. It made me very uncomfortable. But the reason why it did was because my former partners and I never discussed it. With my current relationship, we are open and honest. When in the mood, I even watch it with him. It can be extremely sexy and fun. However, if you aren’t comfortable with that, then talk to him. Perhaps talk to him in a way he won’t feel ashamed or attacked. Communication is key and I have seen ALOT of couples dont discuss sex and what they ARE and ARENT comfortable with.
And because my man is open and honest with me, I trust him 100%. I never feel uncomfortable or the need to look in his phone. He and I even spiced up our relationship by making our own “fun” video. And while he still watches his other collection, he watches OUR video SIGNIFICANTLY more than the other stuff. It has REALLY helped. Especially since I have had some self esteem issues in the past.
Please talk to him! I’m not saying you have to do any of the stuff my boyfriend and I do, I am just saying with communicating, trust and comfort, we have an AMAZING relationship and I dont have to worry.
Give him his space - watching porn or nudity is not cheating.
If you are into it, you do the same thing - check out hot dudes online - they are all over TikTok too with their chiseled chests and crazy dance moves.
As long as he isn’t actually approaching another female online or otherwise - you got nothing to worry about.
Please stop being naïve about how men are - everybody needs some harmless fun in this monotonous, drag of a life. Just chill out and let him be and look for something fun for yourself online.
That’s a personal relationship decision. Everyone is different. Find YOUR boundary and what YOURE comfortable with and stick to that. You deserve what makes you feel good.
There’s porn on Reddit?
If you don’t like it then it’s wrong. If he won’t stop after expressing your dislike for it the join the party and do the same. If he can dish it he better learn how to take. Actually that’s terrible advice lol. Try a marriage councillor. Then separation. TBH if it continues after you tell him it’s hurtful then he doesn’t love and cherish you and you deserve better. My ex husband did this shit. My current husband would never… Because he doesn’t find joy in the idea of being hog food. Blessed be.
I’d say he’s cheating emotionally. Why isn’t he asking you, his wife to do that for him???
personally, that’s perfectly normal Its harmless but have this conversation with him, maybe there’s an interest or desire of his you’re missing and could be able to get him to stop and give it to him yourself…My opinion
How dare he find other women attractive?!
You should leave him asap
So you are saying u don’t watch the TikTok boys? Just go look up a few and don’t let such things bother u
It is normal, yes. The majority of people look. As long as he isn’t touching, I personally wouldn’t be upset. But that your own boundary you have to put up. But just know that most likely if you put your foot down, he will just learn how to hide it because not many see an issue with just looking and tend to get resentful of those that think that’s wrong.
I see a lot of women upset about this. I personally don’t care. What if it was me, I would find him ridiculous if he got mad at me for something I’m doing with myself have you seen “The ugly truth.” Great movie.
Nah this goes right through me. Some women are okay with it, some aren’t. Which is normal. Personally for me, It’s rude and disrespectful. If you feel the need to look at other women obviously I ain’t doing my job and it makes me livid
If you aren’t ok with it address it because everyone has their own opinions about this. Most will tell you it’s no mark blah blah but if you feel you are being disrespected and your feelings are getting hurt don’t ignore it.
It all depends on your view of porn and things, personally if my partner isnt touching or talking to anyone then it doesn’t matter to me
My partner can watch and follow whatever he pleases as can I. As long as he or me is not interacting with them I do not see any harm this has always blown my mind when women get jelous over porn everyone watches porn.
Follow all the hot ticktock men haha that teach him, play him at his own game plus they are all absolutely handsome make your day watching them
Never ok. And you can’t ever compete with a ten second p*orn video. I consider this type of entertainment a form of cheating. If it huts you in any shape or form, then it’s not ok. I wouldn’t ask if other men do it, this is Your man. That’s all that should matter.
I dont care because i do the same lol
my last 2 weeks have been petty jabs at each other because I got a little tipsy and admitted I called a UFC fight strictly because I have a tv crush on Tai Tuivasa & threw in I like the bigger men with facial hair:woman_facepalming:t3: husband wakes me up at 6 a.m every a.m since showing me “how much my beard is grown out since yesterday a.m” when he aggravated me last night I told him that it looked the same as two weeks ago when he started this and I clearly hurt his feelings but seriously,don’t dwell on it ma’am or it’ll eat you alive. TikTok is 90% of junk anyway lol
If you feel secure in all other aspects of your relationship then just ask if there’s something lacking or kinks you’re not aware of without judging him (or look for yourself from what you found if you don’t want to ask) but actually be open to trying out new things. We’ve been together 15 years and once we stopped letting petty stuff make us insecure the relationship has been rock solid and the sex has been ahhhhhmazing lol
Have yous previously talked about this as being a boundary? If so then yes it is a violation of trust if not then you need to have this conversation with him.
So he’s aware many people (men and women) don’t see it as cheating because nothing physical is going on, it would make me uncomfortable to you’re not alone I also think men that watch porn etc have such vivid imaginations of how sex should be.
I’m ok with porn. It’s the sneaky trying to talk and/or meet up that I’m not ok with.
Start making it very known your looking at sexy men . Make sure he notices. Make sure it’s men that don’t look like him at all. So he feels insecure. Start playing the game back. Find your confidence. It’s disrespectful but it won’t stop.
He shows me his tiktok honeys.He says “Babe…she’s looking right at me… she’s talking to me”…I just say uh huh dear… and go about my business. They can’t screw a girl through a video… and them honeys definitely don’t want him:smirk: most women are in denial when it comes to men and porn. 99.99% of men watch it in some form or another. Yes it can feel degrading or hurtful at times, but it is what men do. Rarely are they comparing you to them, and if they are, they are usually just attractive in your eyes… and you literally have nothing to worry about in the way of him going out to cheat with these women with perfect bodies. Best way to get back at him if it hurts you so bad is start acting like he does with hot men videos:man_firefighter: They are noodle heads until they get treated the same…then they realize “well that ain’t cool”. At 20 it bothered me a little because I wanted full attention of my man…at 40 I say go watch your tiktok and leave me be
Who cares as long as hes not trying to get with these women or msging them to try and hook up who cares its pictures or videos there not being sent to him specifically as a means of flirting or cheating porn is porn it’s there for people men and women to explore there interests maybe get ideas for the bedroom or as a means of release life is stressful man sometimes u gotta run one out lol. Seriously though as long as hes nit actually trying to hook up or msging these people there is no harm you can talk to him about it but he might be embarrassed about it maybe hes got some fetish that your not into so he uses this as a means of still getting those needs fulfilled without having to cheat
Strippers on that wife
I wouldn’t be ok with it to be honest, I think it’s disgusting and degrading.
My husband knows to hide such things from me if he does watch it because I’d hit the roof and he’d be flung from it. Simple as that.
See these men be out here marrying naive women that doesn’t know abt Fornication and sexual sins They’re already cheating when they’re looking at another woman dancing around that don’t think that a Cause I come off as a good guy but not have sexual demons u will think this guy will ever talk to a stripper or anything online Naive ones clueless abt the internet game porn get educated the ones that come from good families yeah pay attention
it’s not that it’s normal for men… it’s just normal for humans. i follow so many women and men and i have no idea who they are. i also enjoy porn. condemning someone for enjoying porn is just awful, if it bothers you then you need to make it clear, if you can’t handle the fact that he will watch porn then you should leave him, because this will always be an issue to you.
These can’t be real.
You spelled paedo tinder wrong
And also no its not ok, he’s got a wife for a reason. If he wants to look at boobs then he has yours
Oh hell no, shit if I saw that on my husband’s phone and he’d come to me for sex I’d tell him to go fuck himself watching the videos. I have major issues with porn period. As far as tictok I’d demand him to delete it from his phone. If he needs to see that shit then you don’t need him. Just my opinion.
As long as my husband doesn’t act on it what does it really hurt? Are you saying you don’t ever find another person attractive?
Just because he married you doesn’t mean he no longer things other women look nice.
Why can’t people talk to their spouses instead of running to Facebook ?
I asked the same question but in todays world i think it is normal. As long as he is not acting on those urges in person with other people.
Men are visual creatures. As long as he isn’t conversing with women and coming home to you I don’t see the harm.
It’s okay for this not to be okay with you, if you were doing the same I wonder how he would like it?
Lol walked in on my husband watching porn on his computer…I laughed and closed his office door. He’s 65… we have a very healthy sex life…it didn’t bother me at all…but he looked like a deer caught in the headlights but honestly if he was doing ALL that…then I may b a bit worried.
It’s normal if a woman’s gonna show boobs or bum a man’s gonna look as for porn it’s only looking doesn’t mean their gonna act
Honestly, I wouldn’t say it’s “normal”. Is it common? Maybe. But I would definitely bring it up to him and establish those boundaries - because if you don’t establish boundaries, it’ll continue happening
I mean as long as they were proactive and not provocative right? (Sorry thought it was funny lol.)
And if pon isn’t something you’re okay with- or them watching other females tiktoks. Then talk with them about it. Tell them how it makes you feel. If they don’t see your POV then you need to search for a partner that has the same view as you.
My partner does both of these things aswell (he also doesn’t pursue these woman on social media or etc which I feel like is a big line to cross but we both had set boundaries early on.) in our relationship it is normal. But that DOES NOT mean it has to be normal in YOUR relationship.
I suggest talking to them and if they can’t give those up or find a better alternative- or if yall can’t come to a good compromise- then maybe yall need to pursue other partners.
If you do pursue another partner- please make them aware of what makes you uncomfortable and etc in the beginning so you don’t end up with someone for years and then find out they crossed a line that you never pointed out to them
Are these posts really serious??? Why would you even ask advice? Get rid of him if this is even real!!! Like what the hell!!! I don’t get it!!! Not that hard to say hey out!!!
Honestly it hurt me when I found out to until I got on tik tok and watched what I wanted and he hates that. Got even more mad when he commented on one those videos and one the girls comments back with a video… And spanks her butt at the end… Seriously… He made a new tik tok to hope it changes…
He’s obviously not making you feel secure enough in your relationship for you to be feeling this way .
You should make your own TiK Tok account follow loads of half dressed men … put on some skimpy clothes , get your tits out , dance about then add it to his TiK Tok … so he can see what he has at home … if that’s what he wants to look at so much …
So to the people saying it’s normal do you realize cheaters start some where? And all the women saying their men know they can watch and look as they please you do realize at some point he’s probably dmed or flirting away from you? Like your man’s going to eventually be like “ok she cool with me watching so what else can I do” and start having a work wife or flirting with the girl at the bank. Cheaters don’t typically just cheat they test. I can understand it being said normal for people to notice other people and be able to say they are attractive but just flat out searching for sexual things because they need more is a little much. Also saying all men do this is a bold face lie. Some men don’t need more than what they have. Some men value their woman and marriage and don’t need to watch another woman bend over or throw her tiddies in a circle. I just feel like these comments are not the vibe and honestly really sad because some of you women really came for another woman’s boundaries and feelings in her relationship. Once again there is a difference in noticing a pretty person walk by rather than filling your social feed and search history of other women and sexual things. Also you women saying it’s the norm you have MADE it that way. You make excuses instead of addressing “boys will be boys” theory.
It’s normal for you to be upset by this. The bar of expectations for men is literally on the floor. Women accept this behavior because we’re told “that’s just what men do.” If this isn’t okay with you, you need to tell him and he should respect that.
80% of porn online is from coerced and underage people. It preys on those most vulnerable such as people in poverty, drug addiction, or homelessness. I stopped watching once I realized it’s impact on human trafficking.
So, now that the information is out there, we all have a moral obligation to not feed into this monster.
It may be “normal” but if you’re not comfortable with let him know and work something out. You shouldn’t have to feel uncomfortable and hurt in a relationship over a thing like that.
Long as it’s just looking! Why should it bother you. My partner watches porn or we watch it together.
Long as your partner isn’t talking about sex or whatever with them and using his eyes only I don’t see the problem
It’s common, but depends on what’s normal in YOUR relationship. My bf and I discussed that when we first started dating and agreed it’s a slippery slope and we’d prefer the other person not entertain that idea period. No porn, and he watches the sexy videos on Tiktok but he doesn’t follow them
It’s not ok. Idk why this is considered a normal thing that women just have to accept. It’s a huge problem with our society.
Oh same boat actually just tonight it all blew up first the porn addiction then the tictok sluts now faaark
Personally I find the whole letting men be men thing annoying. It’s literally engrained into us to allow our men to do things that make us uncomfortable and we just get on with it but most men would NEVER allow their wives to watch porn and videos on tiktok of men with their dks swinging. We’re just used to letting men be pigs and having to just get over it. I said what I said. Never said prn is bad and shouldn’t be allowed but if you aren’t comfortable with it you have a right to not want your partner watching it.
I don’t know why so many people have ‘haha’d this post.
Personally I understand that my partner has a separate life and I don’t let myself into his phone or anything. Not because I trust him (I do trust him) but my mental peace is more important to me. But If this doesn’t feel okay to you, who are we to judge? Talk to him. Try to work it out. On a side note - (not trying to be disrespectful to anyone) - aren’t men genetically made like that?
Your relationship can run however you want it to with the boundaries you’re comfortable with. My husband and I both watch porn on our own accord and don’t mind each other doing so
but if YOU don’t like it or want it in your relationship, that’s your right. Everyone else in the world could be into it, that doesn’t mean YOU need to be. “normal” doesn’t matter, how you feel does.
Magic Mike party at your house lmao
No one can decide that but u. Some find porn as a non started some have no issue with porn. All comes down to the two of you however I’d have a discussion. Personally idc I don’t know a man that don’t use porn we they get off by themselves.
I don’t understand why adults have TikTok. TikTok is for teenagers IMO. My husband wouldn’t dare download that crap or Reddit. But I don’t mind if he watches porn, because I do also sometimes. As long as it’s not interfering in your sex life I don’t see the issue with watching porn. I would be more concerned about the girls ages on TikTok, you have 14 years old acting 18 on there. He could get himself in trouble.
He is disrespecting you and that is not okay.
I think it depends on what you boundaries you set for your relationship in the start
I don’t get how someone asks for every woman’s opinion and people berate them like they are better than other women. I personally don’t give two monkeys. If I am not secure in my relationship some rose palm and her five sisters are the least of our issues. Some days we watch together. My point is a posted wanted peoples opinion it wasn’t to attack others. I’ve been cheated on and it wasn’t by the men that were open about their m/b technic. I believe everyone has their own opinion and no one should be attacked. No one is in another sex life and till they are it isn’t their issue. Express how you feel about porn stop jumping at other women. How is that any better than looking at porn. Are any of you racist, sexist, homophonic , transphobic, I don’t say I understand it and it may or may not be for me but I try my damnest to keep my opinions to myself on certain topics. STOP BELITTLING OTHERS TO MAKE YOURSELF BE HEARD.
How would he feel of you did this
Ask him and he’ll say you’re a woman and it’s normal for men to do this
It’s not normal and if it’s hurting you then he can’t say it shouldn’t
Or maybe do the same and see his reaction
My husband looks at it, the only boundaries i have are not when I’m around and don’t save it. It works for us because hey it’s natural to look.
Posts like this always make me wonder what people actually talk about with their partners to build a foundation where they feel that they know each other well enough to commit to spending the rest of their lives together! The best advice I could offer would be to sit down in a private setting and claimly present the situation to him. Allow him to speak about what he does and why. The most important thing would be not to approach this as a confrontation. Make your next moves based on how well this conversation goes.
The tic toks I wouldn’t be okay with but the porn isn’t a big deal
I will never understand people who snoop in their spouses phones. So invasive.
It’s fairly common… but that doesn’t mean you have to be okay with it .
Have ya’ll talked about boundaries?
Side note… snooping through his phone is crossing a boundary
That is not ok.leave. if you had to look through his phone you obviously don’t trust him anyways
It’s not normal. Our society has normalized porn just like alcohol. My husband had a porn addiction for over a year before we got married. He also followed women on social media. It’s disrespectful to me and our relationship. Teach people how to treat you. Have some boundaries
I mean before me and my bf started dating we BOTH agreed porn is cheating, so neither of us watch it. Maybe that’s something you should’ve discussed before.
In my personal opinion, giving other women attention your woman deserves is a form of cheating
i use to have a rule that at the beginning of our relationship it was ok on both parts. once me and him had made our own videos and he’s got photos then it wasn’t allowed anymore. ￼
If he’s just looking that one thing but these new sites have all these links to local hookups and escort sites. U are a woman u have the upper hand here. Think ab it ppl will pay to see u or ur pics and stuff u can actually make money but a man he has to pay for it . He’s probably on only fans too. It’s so easy to set up an account for u and u don’t even have to use but its there bc what’s good for the goose is good for the gander. I guarantee u if u made a bogus account , post some proactive dance or a few pics that don’t show ur face ,ur followers will skyrocket his on the other hand wouldn’t. Make it clear it’s alot easier for a women to go out and get it than a man and u don’t have to pay . Lol they don’t like that. When he confronts u say oh well I thought u likes stuff like that. I’m confused. I spent many nights in strip clubs and men r dogs girl. U put it in front of them they will take it . They r the weaker sex in my opinion, not physically but mentally they r .
The fact that you are questioning it gives you your answer. You know it’s not ok. This shows his lack of respect for you and your marriage.
Give em a taste of his own medicine
Did you tell him prior to marriage that you are not okay with these things? Or are you just pushing your insecurities onto him? Personally, porn is fantasy. So watching it isn’t cheating. If nothing else, it’s a healthy outlet for sexual energy… and he isn’t using it on others… just images on a screen.
1st) NO one should be asking Facebook about how they should feel. You may need time to figure out how you feel.
2nd) the porn subject should have been discussed and boundaries set up long ago. Give yourself some time and space and then have a talk when you have your thoughts and feelings sorted out.
If it makes your uncomfortable, then it needs to be addressed and maturely talked about. Those saying it’s normal, remember what is ok for u may not be ok for another. Talk to him as adults, express your issues, find a resolution.
I think its typical man behaviour, i am solo , yet if were my man id not be happy and be suss yes .
Men get to easily tempted
It is very common but set boundaries