I have been with my husband for 8 years, married 5. We are finally pregnant with our “ours” baby. I am almost 17 weeks. He hasn’t wanted to really be intimate lately and it’s been frustrating, especially after me telling him my sex drive has increased lately. So he finally tells me last night that it “creeps him out” me being pregnant and us having sex. Like, what?!? He says it’s weird knowing there is a baby in there. I said, so are we just not gonna have sex again for the rest of the 9 months?? He didn’t give me a straight answer. Has anyone else had this experience? Am I wrong for being a little pissed and thinking he is acting immature and ridiculous? What the heck am I gonna do?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My husband is weirded out by sex because I'm pregnant
How crazy is it that humans can be so different from each other. Because when I was pregnant, my husband couldn’t keep his hands off of me, but I was so not into it for the second half of my pregnancies and THAT was awful because I know how frustrated he was. He LOVES my pregnant belly and I wanted nothing to do with it
Get a toy start using that I bet he’ll change his mind real quick lol
Coming from someone who has had a baby back to back… my boyfriend now wants me to gain weight because he likes me better pregnant and too… having sex is really good for pregnancy. Obviously not to rough but it’s good for the baby to feel the moms happy emotions… love from the dad. And for the baby it’s being rocked to sleep or it’s rhythm is calming for the baby… in my opinion a husband and wife should be intimate during this time… it’ll bring you two closer… it’s a feeling you can’t get back and so addicting as if you get high off one another… just don’t have a baby back to back though it’s fun afterwards the pregnancies being so close are really rough good luck to you
THROW THE WHOLE MAN AWAY!!! it’s a joke dont come at me
For some reason they think that they are going to hurt us /baby or their goods are gona be in the same space as the baby…my husband was also like that for some of my pregnancy but after my ob/gyn explained it to him we where good after that… Also tell your husband that he put that baby there and ask him wat he thinks it weird about it… My dr explained it to my husband… Good luck
My husband was that way as well, then sex got taken away at 28 weeks cause I had CPP he didn’t mind at all. He just said it was odd. Try to get him to do it from the back he won’t see the belly hopefully it will be like out of sight out of mind
I had the same problem… google is it safe… show him… let him know… “there’s a door” blocking the view… baby will just be rocked to sleep… My husband came around
It’s a general issue with guys, it gets worst once you start to show. You’re not alone, had it with all 3 pregnancies of mine
although i Believe it is Somewhat Common For Men To Feel This Way (My Daughters Dad Said The Same Thing. i Later Found out it Was Just Because He Was Sleeping With Someone Else… Kuz That’s What POS Do i Guess Lol)(Oh, & i am in No Way Suggesting Your Hubby is Sleeping With Someone Else or anything Like That Lol Sorry). But Common or Not, it is Pretty Damn immature & Ridiculous of Men To Feel This Way. Your Feelings are Very Valid, Mamma!
That’s actually a very common male concern with pregnant ladies. First pregnancy we were intimate three times. More every following pregnancy. But I also had three in 4 years. He got over it pretty quickly during the second pregnancy, my hormones didn’t give him a choice. But my advice, buy a vibrator and do it yourself! Hell join when he’s ready.
My husband did the same thing, from the the moment we found at at 8 weeks, he didn’t touch me again till our son was born he has made up for it though, some guys just get creeped out i suppose
Sex is not just the act of in and out pumping. Theres so much you both can do if his main fear is hurting the baby by penetrating. Google that together and start.
I would feel hurt too, but it is common. Hopefully you can have him talk to your OB/GYN about it and educate him on the mechanics of everything. If he still feels weird, maybe counseling would help you guys work through it. He hopefully will return to normal after the baby is born since you guys have been together so long already, but that doesn’t mean either of your feelings are invalid. You may have to find ways to take care of yourself though until the baby is born. I’m sorry and I feel for you. It’s already an emotional time as it is. You do need to communicate about this though, but remember that a lot of men feel this way during their wife’s pregnancy.
He might be afraid it would hurt the baby. Or just doesn’t feel right having sex while your pregnant. Just take him to the doctor with you and let him discuss with the doctor about his fears of having sex while you are pregnant. Some people just don’t like sex when they are their spouse is pregnant. It’s perfectly normal. You both just need to talk with the doctor about it.
What??? Im on my 5th pregnancy nd my husband wants to do it all the time he always have thru out all of our pregnancies
Your husband’s reaction is totally normal. Your overreaction is also normal. Just try to be intimate in other ways that is comfortable to both of you. No point in forcing a man to feel interested in something he genuinely feels strange about.
My husband was like that too once I started showing
I haven’t had see for 4 month’s with my husband you will live
I had that happen to me. He eventually gave in because he really wanted sex too lol
Maybe wear sexy clothes. I have no real advice sorry. My husband couldn’t get enough during both my pregnancies. Sex is way better. Due to everything being swollen due to all the extra blood flow.
That is so friggin weird to me…advice given to me,…and I’ve shared…pleasure your partner,…when you can, and most other trivial stuff…falls away…sometimes
Yes I went through the same thing! From July to basically December sometime we didn’t do a thing! it as awful!
Buy a toy and remind him he is replaceable.
Buy toys for now, he’ll come around be patient
It’s a normal reaction. I didn’t follow up with other guys how that went but I eventually caved. I was just more gentle.
I kind of get it, seems weird sticking your PP where there’s a baby. & I know that’s not where the baby is but still
I’d almost bet he’ll change his mind before the end of it. Maybe not though. I’d definitely be upset
I lived the same struggle with both our pregnancies. It’s frustrating and not much I could do to change his mind especially once I was showing.
When he’s is bed ask him for it. If he denies, whip out a toy and do it in front of him . Make sure the toy is as big or bigger then him, to show it’s not hurting you.
Unpopular opinion. Don’t pressure him, and don’t talk badly about him. If it were a man pushing a woman for sex, everyone on here would be telling the woman to leave.
It’s still his body and his choice, his reasons are still valid even if they seem childish. No one, male, female, etc should be forced to do sex acts that they are uncomfortable with no matter the situation.
Honestly, some men have problems separating a woman’s sexual identity from her identity in pregnancy and motherhood because they rigidly compartmentalize these aspects of womanhood. In their minds, the sexual identity of a woman is totally removed from her identity as a mother. That sounds like what might be happening here - and it also sounds like he doesn’t fully understand it himself.
His response to you “it’s weird because you’re pregnant” supports this idea rather than he is worried about hurting you or the baby because if that were the case, he would have just said he was concerned he might hurt you/the baby.
This may be attributed to repressed feelings about sex or thoughts that sex is inherently dirty or wrong. If this is the root issue, your husband may have difficulty reconciling these feelings associated with sex and the institutions of motherhood and pregnancy, which are generally seen as pure and beautiful. Right now he may not be able to separate you from your role as a mother, particularly because you have his child inside you. Your husband might be just as frustrated as you, especially if he is unable to communicate his feelings clearly or does not have a full understanding of why he is sex avoidant during this time.
If you think this may be an accurate assessment of what is going on, then I would say you should contact a sex therapist or counselor for a more personal approach to helping solve this.
Id let him know that after baby comes there will be a LONG period where u cant. Then you wont want to out of exhaustion.
This is his time to get it BEFORE baby comes.
And if he doesnt care…dont feel bad when youre too tired later🤷♀️
Cuz we ALL know thats comin aha
Take him with you to a doc appt and ask the doctor in front of him lol or have him ask so he can know that it’s fine from someone other than you and someone who y’all are trusting with your care and the babys
I feel like this is super common in men!
I’d give him a friendly reminder that once you have that baby he’s not gonna have a chance for an additional six weeks.
Honestly momma, my advice, getcha self a toy or two & learn how to do it yourself. If he don’t like it be straight up & say “well honey, you didn’t wanna do me so I had to find an alternative”
That not a man that’s a little boy lmao
Sex can actually be beneficial during pregnancy! As long as your dr hasn’t given you any restrictions, it’s perfectly safe and so are most toys. Maybe try a different position so your belly’s not in the middle? My husband and I only started that because I’m so huge but baby has no idea what’s happening on the outside.
Lots of women go through this…you are not alone. That being said, it can certainly wreak havoc on the self esteem. Remember, you are the most beautiful woman in the world to him as you are carrying his child. Things WILL get better and he WILL come around. Until then, lots of self care for you! Read a good book, go out with the girls, spend time with a favorite pet, get a pedicure, have some fun at the dollar store! There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with you or how you look. Our bodies were created to nurture life.
With my second his father wouldn’t touch me the entire pregnancy:( so I used a toy
Good luck mama
Some men think they might hurt the baby. Perfectly natural reaction. He just needs some reassuring it’s ok.
I wouldn’t want to have sex either. It is weird and very distracting. So it’s not just him lol.
His body his choice. If he isn’t comfortable then just find intimacy other ways like cuddling and spending time together.
Same thing happened to me after a certain week in my pregnancy my boyfriend was like uhhhh my son is in there ew no
Take him with you to your next OB appointment and explain the situation to your doctor… Let them explain why it’s not going to be like he’s touching the baby with his penis, when you guys are having sex…
It’s a normal feeling for most men there scared they will hurt it and there kinda sharing your body so it may seem weird for them
My ex stopped having sex with me once we found out we were having a girl… weird and frustrating.
I can’t seem to get away from mine first half of my pregnancy everything was great now I’m 9 months in and want absolutely nothing to do with it but we make it work
My husband was the exact opposite. Get yourself a good toy
I was the one weirded out when I was preggers… Sorry
My EX husband was the same! One of the many many many reasons he is an EX lol
Good luck with that . Lol freaking men!!!
Explain to him your cervix Is closed and baby is protected in a sac
Have an open marriage for the duration of the pregnancy. He gets to shag nonpregnant people and you get to have your Needs met too. Everybody wins and nobody cheats and sins… and obviously everyone is tested and safe at all times.
Problem solved.
Yes , I made my Dr. write a prescription handed if to my husband… altho I was also thoughtful on how he felt and rolled with it … no biggie because after the baby comes the tables change
next time you go to your OB, bring your husband & tell the Dr how he feels & he will tell him it’s OK,
You can’t force him to have sex with you like he can’t force you… Sit down and talk to your husband not to ramdoms on Facebook… Work it out with him… When I was pregnant I didn’t want sex at all… He has his reasons maybe you should find out…
Story of my life, except my S/O refuses to have sex with me while pregnant & AFTER having his children. We are entirely celibate now. I don’t pressure him into anything sexually because that is unfair if he’s not into it. I really, really miss sex but he’s turned me down so many times it is not anything we even discuss anymore.
Girl get a toy and just let him be it’s 9 months you wills be okay! Hell at some point you’re not even probably gonna want sex let alone have him touch you.
But honestly has a right to feel how he feels and you gotta respect it cause if it was the other way around y’all would be ripping his ass apart let the man be and get a toy
I’m 24 weeks pregnant and my sex drive has been soo high. My boyfriend loves it. Good luck momma.
No, he’s being a drama queen. My husband didn’t have that problem and I was a whale of a pregnant woman
Go f*ck yourself…literally and do things in bed you know turns him on. Every man loves head. Give him some but don’t let him come. Then tell him that’s how frustrated you are. And make him watch while you make yourself come. If that don’t work amp up his jealousy and suggest a sexual surrogate. He gonna be childish be childish right back…least you have the excuse of a physical inner child
I am a father of 4 kids. Ain’t nothing better than pregnant sex. This man is nuts.
Men are stupid dear. His lil wee wee isn’t gonna hurt the baby lol jp