When u are with a man that has a child with someone else it’s not ur place to say anything. It’s between him and her, he’s a deadbeat if he doesn’t fight for his child. And the fact is it really sounds like he was sleeping with you while with her. And trust me baby living with someone don’t stop them from cheating. Just cause y’all live in the same house don’t mean he isn’t cheating. If he wasn’t sleeping with her or didn’t have feelings for her he would defend you and your children when she talks her mess.
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She won’t take him to court? Why not? I think he should take her to court and have a DNA test. Something in milk is not clean. I’m sorry you are going through this.
Suck it up and deal. You aren’t raising this child so your input does not matter. Sign away his rights? Are you crazy? It’s a child NOT something to sweep under a rug. It sounds like you are putting yourself in a position you are not mature enough for. . Step back and let him try to parent, you don’t have a dog in this fight if you aren’t helping to raise the child. Also, you have probably already suspected him of cheating otherwise you would not have stressed that in your story so hard. You came here looking for support but you are acting entitled simply because youre having his baby. Bet she felt the same way. Wise up.
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I’d say drag her through court! Yeah it maybe a long process, but your already having to deal with her so you may as well take her butt to court! Save all the ugly text messages actually save all the txts! Take her to court file for full custody! She will have no choice she will have to go to court.
restraining order. court order for visitation. document everything. every text. any calls. and money spent. any time he sees her.
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I am not sure where y’all live but in most places, just signing your rights away isn’t an option. It really sounds to me like y’all need to grow up. I get not wanting to get the courts involved but that is the only way to get what is best for the child done.
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Breastfeeding comment was 100% unnecessary. That’s her choice. But everything else you have a damn good case to take her to court even if it’s just for a restraining order.
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A man cant just sign over his rights…unfortunately the only options you have ARE court or cps… if he declines both then you will forever have this problem…
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Is he sure he is the father? Sounds like sure would do anything to try to break y’all up. He should get a test and if it isn’t his y’all can just cut her off but if it is his and if he wants a relationship then he needs to take her to court and possibly get custody because she seems very unstable. Honestly I think he was sleeping with you both.
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Sounds like a bunch of shit. “Don’t want to take her to court” That’s just plain laziness. Neither of y’all are taking responsibility for this poor baby. Why would you encourage your husband to give away his first born?
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She threatened to cut your child out of you and you didn’t say anything. I think your time for speaking up is passed… Let dad take care of this one.
Take her to court to get rights. Also If I were u I would refrain from saying u think he should sign over his rights that’s NOT your place to say so u really should step back there
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Get attorney and get custody of her she would be better off with you guys write everything she says and does
Seems all 3 adults need to grow up …just be parents .
There is no such thing as signing his rights away ,they can be terminated by a court if your deemed unfit or if the mother remarries and her husband wished to adopt that child and he is still hasn’t legitimized that child through DNA .
He needs to get a lawyer & take her to court & don’t erase those text messages he can use them in court
Obviously you could careless about a part of you husband. You should be encouraging him to seek full custody of a child in a toxic environment. Is it that you don’t want him to spend to the money to get the child because you don’t like the mother? Are you jealous?
If he signs away his rights make sure its signed off by a judge or he will still owe child support same thing happened to my brother he signed away rights and found out his license were revoke for non support just because it wasnt signed by a judge
Would you sign your rights away to your child never
If she is really saying ask those things and making threats get a protective order and try to get custody.
Ok how would u like it if he up n left you too and his other kids why would you make him chose u or his child 
Felicia
Damn yall are just horrible… I have went thru this and now mine got away from the toxic people in there life and child support so even if he doesn’t see the kid he can still pay child support, it’s not good to have all this negitivty around a child, it can affect him so I think they dad should cut the mother off and just pay child support, it worked for me and my man no drama
I think your butting into other people’s lives when this has nothing to do with you. Another girl trying to run her boyfriend’s life… When y’all get married… Then u have a reason to be involved. 
Let him be in that child’s life no matter what 
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I went through this same shit for 18 years now. Thankfully its finally over. My husband was told by a judge that he could not sign away his rights because he would not allow him to bastardize his child. Now we are the ones in her life and they have a wonderful relationship and the mother is out of the picture. When she came of age, she sees the way things really are. I’m so glad he wasn’t allowed to sign away his rights.
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Hell no dont let him give up his daughter get her away fr ok m that crazy lady
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He should go to court and take the child.
I’d fucking leave him that’s way to much drama why would you wanna bring another kid into that
Is he on the birth certificate
Firstly just because you live together means nothing. I lived with my ex husband for 14 years and he cheated on me daily with 3 to 4 different men and woman DAILY!!! EVERY DAY!!! secondly who are you to say he should sign his rights over. He is a dad and needs to step up to be there for his baby. That baby is innocent and if she is as vile as you make out then surely that baby needs its father to protect it.
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He should take her to court.
This ex girlfriend sounds really mentally unstable. I would be afraid for my children. So you not wanting to involve the court is beyond me. Unless you just secretly really want to convince him to give up on his daughter…
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I’ve dealt with a bitter ex-wife for 13 years. And she’s the one that left my husband for another man. We met 8 months after their divorce and she still hates me to this day…not that I care. I think the first thing that should have happened would have been to get the courts involved. Second, I would say he needs to communicate only through email or text with her. There is nothing worse than a woman scorned meddling in your relationship. We went a long time with court battles, custody battles, her trying to get me arrested, trying to get a restraining order on me…just keep track of everything and no matter what…do not interact with her. This may be a long road as it was for me, but my husband was worth it. His kids are much older now (20 & 16) and live 10 minutes away and we saw them 4 times in 2019. She has definitely turned them against us but she’s a crazy lunatic. She left her husband she left my husband for and she’s doing the same exact thing with his kid and the guy she left him for, she will do it to him and their kid too. One can only hope my husband’s kids will see her pattern and understand what my husband had to go through…or they won’t. I DON’T CARE ANYMORE! So get things through the court and you should stay far away from her!
He need to take her to court. Point blank period. He is not fighting for his daughter. What the hell you mean give up his rights. So his daughter can know he did not fight for her. Because her mama is a bitch!!! Get the courts involved and go from there.
DNA test via the court. Family court judge will determine custody. If you serve her with papers she HAS TO GO. That kid is his responsibility. The woman he fucked before you was his poor judgment but he doesn’t get to run away from his RESPONSIBILITY.
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Sounds like she is mentally unstable. Take her to court get that baby away from her. Had she talked about my mom or called my child the N word I would be in prison for stomping her ass in the ground.
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There’s a NO BASTARD LAW where I’m from. It’s not legally possible to give up your children and the responsibilities you owe as the mf that dicked down and made the baby. I have damn near the same exact story line with my current husband ! I couldn’t stop reading your post because it was like someone telling my story…if you had a baby for any reason, would you pick him over it ? Smh
U need to go do what u were going to do beat her ass!!!
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call police. she is threatening you with death. and your child
Any man can be a sperm donor but real men are fathers, that child didn’t ask him to be made and apparently at one point he didn’t have any issues with being with her mother, regardless a innocent child was born and she darn site needs a better childhood, take legal action now and get this situation better for this child before it’s too late… she can grow up suffering mentally leading to bad choices and feeling unwanted, even resenting your children because they have her Dad and she doesn’t, I would do my best to make sure these siblings can grow up knowing each other like siblings do, children do better receiving love from everyone but definitely they don’t do good at all when a parent just throws them away trying to sign off a child is horrible.
Purposely breastfeed?? FYI not all women want to or choose to breastfeed some women take meds and have chronic illness where they can’t breastfeed so what if the baby eats formula that’s her choice as a mom your one judgy bitch he probably in her bed as you write this whiny ass post
You guys have babies 4 months apart, another one on the way, you’re all complaining about money, she says he’s cheating on you with her…
fricking close your legs, people.
Trashy people have trashy lives.
Get some class and be responsible people and you won’t have to worry about this crap.
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I would of took the messages she said about going to kill You and baby to police department her ass would be in jail and your bf would have his baby
Be the bigger person and try to get proof of her harassment and sickening threats and racist remarks. It sounds like signing over his rights would be a bad idea. Id take her to court for visitation and have a mediator exchange the child to avoid dealing with her.
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If you hv to go thu all dz…wt a 2xs baby moma…u need to sty out of it.you hv a child now.all dz drama is not a way to brng up your baby.let it go…dont do this to your child.yall need peace🌹go raise your child in peace.sty out out sme1elses drama.your a gd.Mom show it🌹
Been in those shoes and you will be extremely uncomfortable wearing them. Leave the relationship one and let your boyfriend figure it out on his own. Right now, there’s an innocent baby that didn’t ask for confusion. You said she didn’t tell him until she found out that he was dating you, he’s playing games with both of you and before you get egg on your face; step back.
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It’s simple really. Have your SO take her to court and get visitation rights to his child. Make it so they exchange said child at the police station if it’s a problem. Problem solved. Also have him go to child support and be financially responsible for his child with her.
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I think it would be a bad idea. Think of it this way. If he signs over his rights - that’s it. There is no going back. That baby will be stuck with that psycho for the rest of her life. Who’s to say she wouldn’t harm the child because it’s a part of him? Even if there is an ugly custody battle remaining steadfast dispite the bm drama would be guaranteeing a positive light In the child’s life. If he just walks away the child will eventually feel abandoned and resent him. That’s a dark path to go down. I’ve seen the psycho bm first hand. Anyone who could speak like that about ANY child is heartless toward all kids. I say document everything. Get the courts involved. That’s what they’re there for.
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He can fill through the OAG himself. And actually it would benefit him more if he did so in this situation. Before, during and After court order visitation is in place y’all can actually meet at a police station every single time to cut out any drama that may occur. Also if she continues to harass and speak ill will on you and the family she can be charged with Attempted endangerment of a child as well as premeditated murder. From mother to Southern Mother collect any and all receipts that y’all pay for the child etc. Any and ALL written messages as well as recording all phone calls and saving voicemails. She will be innocent until proven guilty and with what your saying I believe you have hard evidence to get full custody of the child that is this petty, bitter, immature female’s.
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First, save receipts for everything! That way you have proof to show that he is providing. Second although your situation seems extremely rough, it does seem a bit extreme to have him sign over his rights. His daughter is not the issue in this situation, the baby momma is. So eliminate her, which means you would have to take her to court. From the sound of it it’ll be a tough fight but if you have any proof of her threats and altercations use it, request to have custody since she seems extremely unstable. Or if that doesn’t work out try to make it where y’all would not have to encounter her when the child is going to y’all or vice versa. I wish you the best. I have a step daughter who was born 3 months after my husband and I fist got together and things were difficult in the beginning, nothing like your incident but similar with how she didn’t allow him to see her. We are on great terms now and she and I actually talk and interact more than her and my husband which is great to me and we’ve always been on the same page about not going to court but if our situation was more like yours I would have definitely encouraged him to go to court. Good luck with everything.
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please take her to court… if she’s that nasty then she’s probably awful to the daughter. especially since she’s so mad at your husband… she might end up resenting their daughter and being abusive. sometimes what’s in the best interest of a child can be a fucking headache, but the child is what’s most important not the petty bullshit this lady spews. if she doesn’t let him see the child he doesn’t have to be sending her shit. seriously, put the kid first and take her to court.
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Yes, you are wrong for wanting him to sign his rights over.
GET COURTS INVOLVED! He deserves to have his daughter in his life, and his daughter deserves him. Pay court ordered child support and get shared custody and have his time with his daughter.
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I would document everything from the beginning and take him to court. Fight for that baby!!!
First of all it is not the baby’s fault ,The baby deserves to have a dad in her life , Your husband needs to take her to court and get visitation also just because he would sign his rights away doesn’t mean he won’t have to pay for child support.
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First yes you are in the wrong. Quit trying to get rid of his child.
Second just cause you live together doesn’t mean he cant cheat on you. Have you never heard of married couples having affairs.
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I think you need to put the other child first. Right now she may not know her father, but it sounds like the mom is not mentally ok to raise her. If he signs off his rights and doesn’t take her to court to at least try When she is a teenager she is going to feel so much rejection. She is going to feel like it was her. Why didn’t my dad want me. So I think, regardless of how horrid and toxic the relationship is between your SO and her, the right thing is to fight for the child. You might actually get full custody. Just my opinion.
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I think you’re wrong, you should be pushing to go to court not to give the kid up
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Stop being cordial u dont have to say anything to her he needs to get a dna test that will solve everything once those results are in u can go from there if it is already determined to be his child then court is the next step it is for this exact reason they will set a schedule and she will have to provide his necessities or be able to let yall
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Go to court. 50/50 custody and meet at public places. After. A lot of time maybe you will all grow TF up and move on. The kids are far more important than any of you
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Yes you are wrong. He needs to take HER to court.
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Yeah honestly just go to court that’s the only option. I see y’all both say no to court but why. That’s the resolution to all your issues it is wrong honestly to ask him to just sign away his rights just because the mother isn’t doing it willingly. That’s still his child and if y’all haven’t even tried court then yeah of course you’re going to have issues because reality of the matter is some baby moms are just like that and court is your only resort. Stop making it hard on both of y’all and just go to court and get it over with. Then she has to let him have his child too and you and her don’t have to talk 
fuck her and how she is do what your doing cuz as soon as you go to court and have the situation controlled she has nothing else to say. Y’all won. Shes got all control right now and she knows it
Actually my husband is going through the same thing with his baby momma, he only gets to see his daughter 6 weeks a daughter and I’m going through the same thing with my ex husband he gets my son every other weekend supposed to pay child support , have insurance on his son
U don’t want court involved because u wanna play house and pretend his old family doesn’t exist. It’s easier to say here take my boyfriend’s rights away from this kid so the crazy ex goes away and we don’t have to Dela at all. Not cool. He chose this baby mom so he needs to step up and fight for that baby
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Take her to court … He should not sign over his rights… That is wrong…
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I dont think he can just walk in and sign his rights away, she (the ex) has to approve of that first if im not mistaken
Why doesn’t he want to get the court involved?
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Don’t punish that poor little BABY because y’all don’t know how to be adults and work shit out. Your husband needs to man up and take her ass to court. There are ways you can work around her drama through the court systems anyway so pull up your big girl panties and deal with it. Children aren’t disposable just because the other parent can be difficult. End of story.
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Sorry but no ! That’s really messed up you want him to sign his rights away. You say you stay neutral not what I read if it really has to do with being done with her drama take her to court get a PFA for the messed up shit she is saying and get her for harrassment. Just the whole story idk something is off!
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Im not putting no comment just inbox me
He needs to fight to see if the baby is even really his first, and if she is then he needs to fight for his parental rights and have a parenting plan set up by the court, with a stipulation that child exchange occur at the police station with an officer present during the entire time. You are being selfish by actually thinking it’s ok for him to abandon his child only because your feelings are hurt. You are letting her petty immature words bother you and you both are acting like little girls. You need to be more of a mother than a woman and fight for this little girl too! If she is your son’s sister than you also have an obligation to make sure she is ok! Forget her with her bs, take your proof to court about her threats and ask for an injunction. If you have text with her threatening yours and your baby’s life and you feel threatened a judge won’t deny the initial temporary order. No judge will deny him his rights as long as he isnt a drug addict or a known abuser. I just cant believe you’d be okay with abandoning that baby girl with her crazy mother to endure only God knows what! I pray her!
What he needs to do is take her to court, show every message she’s ever sent threatening you and the unborn baby, to get full custody and a restraining order. If she’s making threats like that to you and the unborn baby, she’s not fit to be a mother, she’s obviously unstable. A baby doesn’t need to be around that, who knows if she could hate you and your husband so much that she could possibly her child just because she’s his. I say that because my friends ex abused his son just because he was the father. I mean like cigarette burn marks all over him and malnutrition
First, u be his listening ear. Be there for him, support him. Keep in mind it’s none of ur business. The fact that ur searching for answers and advice, says ur overstepping ur boundaries. That’s his kid. That’s the woman he decided to have a child or children with. Let him, do what he feels is best and what God put in his heart to do. He doesn’t need ur influence or input. Their going to be there; they were there before u, during u, and after. U don’t want to be the reason, something goes wrong. He’ll resent u, if things don’t work out the way he thought they were because of u. Mind ur business. That’s not a bad thing. Even if u were his wife, mind ur business. If u feel ur relationship is worth keeping. God bless you
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Take her to court and take full custody of the baby. She obviously has mental issues and could hurt the baby if he does sign his rights away.
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She really sounds like a narcissist and/or borderline personality disorder. She needs mental health and to be on medication!!!
They only care about themselves and blame others constantly when it’s not their fault at all. She needs to be evaluated day a psychiatrist!
Take her to court. Get court involved it is the only way.
There’s more to this I am sure, but signing his rights over? For real ? That baby deserves to be loved. I feel bad for the poor child. Her Mother using her, her father, and stepmother just ready to give up on her completely. I hope that baby girl finds a family that loves her unconditionally. She doesn’t deserve any of you. Poor baby girl.
Just by you saying he should sign his rights over, I have no words. Do you realize that little girl is a sibling to your children ?
How sad it must be, so little and so unloved, because of 3 grown ups acting dumb.
I think you’re just as bad as the mother.
Edit: You don’t stay neutral. If the Mother is as crazy and you say she is, how could you think about leaving that baby girl to deal with the craziness alone? So you don’t care if that baby is being taken care of? You’re cold hearted.
And for real, not everyone likes to breastfeed.
If your man can’t afford his children, he should keep it in his pants.
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TAKE HER SICK ASS TO COURT. That baby deserves her father!!
Definitely shouldn’t sign off his rights take her to court that poor baby what a shame that her own mother uses her that way and step mom just wants the father to sign her away like she is nothing he is her father to she deserves to have her father just as much as ur baby I am sure there is more to this like why doesnt the father want to take her to court when that should be the solution get a restraining order against her get visitation and ask that it be someone else who does the drop offs and pick ups of the child then u all never have to deal with her drama again and he gets to see his child and be a dad to her but god I can not believe that is ur solution for him to sign his rights off I dont give a crap how much crap this chic does giving up on ur own flesh and blood child should never be the answer!!! I get how upsetting and frustrating this must be for u especially the fact she is saying such horrible disgusting things but there r ways to not have to deal with her and ur husband still be a father to that child!!!
I just feel like a lot of drama could be avoided here if the courts were involved.
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Not wrong but I’d suggest you take her to court first.
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He can take her to court. And get a restraining order so she cant talk to u or be around u
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Take her ass yo court n see wtf that judge gona tell her n do yall dnt hv to go threw that
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It would be absolutely unfair to that child to ask your husband to give it up. I understand baby momma drama. My boyfriends ex is a real peach too. Court orders can do wonders though… and if she refuses to abide by them he could push for sole custody of that child. Please dont make him give up. Every child deserves parents.
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Coming from a family where my dad left because of my mom PLEASE DONT DO THAT! DO NOT WALK AWAY! that little innocent child will question her self and her values for her entire life. She will always ask what she did wrong why she wasn’t good enough. Go to court. Fight for that baby. If you have to get stuff against her for harassment but don’t give up on that baby because the mom is crazy.
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As frustrating as it is I don’t think it’s your choice to tell him to sign over his rights… that should be done on his own accord if that’s what he wants or he will resent you for telling him to. I get it’s frustrating hurtful and all that but it’s hurtful for you to tell him to give up his daughter to. I think he needs to have a good think about what HE wants and go from there whether it’s court or so forth
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Someone needs to be adopting the little girl… don’t believe u can just sign off rights that easy
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U should call the cops everytime she makes threats. Get a phone recorder app on ur phone and screenshot all texts, keep police reports. Document everything. Keep ur receipts and make sure ur husband keeps fighting for rights. I see him winning full custody and her going to jail after u file a ppo against her
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Just save every message text voicemail and have her charged with harassment against u and ur kids and hubby. No order no contact make her take u to court. And u can’t sign over rights unless someone else is willing to step in in every case I have ever heard of in the last 16 years. But u can get protection orders and restraining orders and if he’s not on the birth certificate or have a court order then he can step away til she takes him to court and then u present all this to judge and they make her stop and he gets Time with child.
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Go to court ! So much easier on your side
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why would you even consider giving up the baby to her if she’s made threats to your other children? I would FIGHT like hell for that baby, especially if she’s been also using you guys for money for milk. You are in the wrong for believing that little girl would be okay left alone with that woman, what do you think she’d do to the baby once she doesn’t have any leverage with you guys anymore? It’s a terrifying thought for me that’s for sure ! If she’s able to think about taking your unborn child out of your body and killing both of you what’s to stop her from thinking the same with her own child? That type of anger is never good for anyone especially the poor baby, go to court and fight for that baby.
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I am sorry but I do think you are being selfish. This is his child and he should take her to court and get things settle not gor her but for his baby.
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I say take her to court. If you have proof of what she’s said about your baby and you…it MIGHT show she’s unstable. I understand why you want him to sign his rights over, but it all depends how he feels. Sorry you are going through this…stay strong and support your husband no matter what decision is made…it is his child.
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She is psycho take her to court
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Yes you are, she’s the problem not the child. She doesn’t sound like a women who needs full rights to the child
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Lmao how can h decide that for him …how about u sing ur rights over ur kids ? …I mean regardless is hes child … unless hes wants to
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Take her to court dont give that dime bag lazy ass cunt what she wants because doing that will only cause him to lose any chance of knowing his daughter because theres no telling what shes going to be told by her mom
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Umm ya, he can take her bitch ass to court. Don’t let him be trash and sign his rights over ffs
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My question is if you know she’s like that how are you comfortable leaving that child with her?? Sorry I would make him fight for full custody if I was his woman… it ain’t about you, yes the shit she said was horrible but when you become a parent it is not about you and your feelings anymore
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Family court judges hate bitches like that. Fucking drag that bitxh to court
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First I would get a court order for a dna test to make sure that was his kid…then family court
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Take her to court for criminal threatening. Get a restraining order for you and your child and your man if they’ll allow it. Your man needs to step up and her salty ass to knock it off.
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