My husband sweared at me at our friends house over a pineapple: Do I have a right to be upset?

That’s verbal abuse, plain and simple. If he feels he can treat you like that in front of others, it won’t be long before he treats you like that in the comfort of your own home. You need to TELL (not ask) him to stop that behavior. If also suggest coupke’s therapy

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You did the right thing by addressing it. If it stops, then great. If it doesn’t, it never will.

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That’s a pretty big red flag. Please dont ignore the signs. Stay strong and trust your gut.

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I am so sorry, but I am afraid it is only going to get worse.

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Yes big red flag get out now

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My husband says do not trust him.

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Not a nice thing for a husband or wife to do!

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Hit him with the pineapple

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It will happen again, over and over and over, and it will get worse and worse, been there done that and divorced the abusive asshole.

This will continue and get much worse.

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You sound ridiculous right now with your he sweared at me​:rofl::rofl:are you 2?

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I would of called him out, and not to be so fu—ing rude, and then would be a smart mouth and rude to him when we visited his family or friends. If u start putting him in his place around other people when he acted like that, then he will learn to control that smart ass mouth of his.

I wouldn’t have waited until we got home. I would have went right back at him right then and there! If you allow that shit, it will continue. And if this isn’t the first time it’s happened, it certainly won’t be the last. That is NOT how you treat your spouse!

I mean…let’s be honest here. My spouse use to be super sweet to me, and me to him. But, now. If we don’t say “what the fuck is wrong with you?” AT LEAST once a day, then something is wrong. I’m not the same sweet person I was 11 years ago when we met, and I don’t expect him to be. So. Not a big deal in my eyes. HOWEVER…if you’re not use to it like it sounds like, I would respond with, “wow. Ok. I didn’t know your name changed to Richard since you’re being such a freaking dick right now.” He wants to act all big and bad in front of his friends, then I’ll act all big and bad as well.

I would have checked him there, right in the moment, bet he would NOT do it again. I don’t deal with disrespect well, especially in front of others, that would light my temper in a heartbeat. You have every right to be upset. Me and my hubs go to dinner about once a week at a mutual friends, I help in the kitchen just as much as they do, he’ll help too if it’s needed, no biggie, you’ll are eating the food, also!

If he only does it in front of people, sounds like that man complex is strong and he’s trying to show he’s in charge, which is completely ridiculous, but it’s definitely something that he needs to work on.

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He sounds like a trash human all the way around tbh

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He sounds like an immature little boy.

Bless your patience because I’m petty and would of gave that same energy right on back in front of everyone. Now we’ll both be embarrassed :woman_shrugging:t2:. If he was really that pressed over a pineapple he could pulled you aside and said something. Seems like it’s way more then just that if it’s becoming a habit. I truly believe he has no respect for you if you’ve expressed in private that you don’t like it and he continues to do so. This whole situation is just a no from me. I mean hopefully he keeps his word and doesn’t do it again but if he does DO IT RIGHT BACK!

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My husband just looked at me like “what the fuck?” He agrees that disrespecting you like that in public or private is a huge red flag

This is the beginning of emotional abuse. He’s concerned more about how his friends perceive him than you do. Somehow being loving and kind is weak, so he has to be big man in front of them. Showing them that HE is in charge.

Eventually it will happen at home, so that you remember your place.

Get couples therapy or get out

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Get rid of the jerk …now It will only progress

He just seem like an all around asshole

If he’s just now getting in a habit of doing it in front of others, that means he’s been doing it behind closed doors for a long time. Time to seek counseling and then divorce if it doesn’t change. I wasted 10 years of my life being abused by my exhusband and hate it. Don’t do that to yourself.

He apologized let it go and move on hun it’s marriage don’t hold onto the little things maybe just voice that the swearing coming from him just makes you uncomfortable

Get out now. I stayed for the kids for 35 years. What a fool i was. I wasted all my life practically hoping it would change and only got worse and worse. Finally i filed for a devoice and im so happy now with my love of my life. Its just the beginning for you. He would argue at restaurants home vacations it didnt matter and i felt so humilated. Sorry is in the mind of them because they know you will stay. Go. Dont look back while you are still young. Lifes too short.

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I hate men who do that! It makes me so angry. My husband started to vdhave that way and I nipped it in the bud right away. I said, if you don’t apogize to me right here and now, I’m leaving here and going home where you won’t be welcome until you do apologize to me. He apologized to me . Then I took it one step further and said I now apologize to our friends for making them feel so un easy during this whole thing. Once he saw that I really was done with that behavior and valued myself much more than he did and that had to change, our life together was so much better. Good luck! God they really are assholes though aren’t they?!