My husband thinks I should keep breastfeeding: Advice?

I gave my son a top up bottle and kept on nursing him, you could try taking milk thistle to increase your milk and drink plenty of water. Best of luck x

Does he want the baby to starve??

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Ask him if he is going to try and sooth the screaming baby who is starving… fed is best period

Tell him you are stopping. He doesn’t get a vote.

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Tell him to take some Domperidone, get out the pump and get to work producing milk for the baby if he is so adamant on baby being EBF :roll_eyes:

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Get a new husband who respects your body, well being, and baby.

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He has no say. If you aren’t producing enough go to formula. Sometimes it can take a while to produce though. My first I over produced, my second I barely produced, but enough to continue just didnt get any when pumped, and my last was just the right amount.

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Tell him to shut up. Your a mother and at the end of the day you know best. FEED YOUR BABY!!

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You need to eat better

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No man is gonna tell me how long I have to breast feed for.

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I understand the dynamic. Talk to your dr.get his opinion. Then go over it all with your husband. If possible, take him with you to the appointment. Don’t wait until the next check up. This needs addressed now!

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The question is do YOU want to keep breastfeeding and if so try to get medical help maybe a nutritionist. However he does not have a say it is you’re body not his!! Don’t feel guilty mon you got this.!

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Fed is best.
If you are truly not producing enough, then your baby isn’t getting enough to be healthy. Even a small amount of breast milk a day can do wonders for a baby’s system, but if he isn’t getting enough to eat, then other options should be examined and considered. The whole point is to do what is best for your child.

Tell him to let the kid suck on his titties since nothing is coming out and when the baby is still hungry and frustrated he can just whip the titties out again.

My boyfriend wanting nothing but breast milk but mentally I couldn’t handle it. Explain to him the best make he can get is the milk in the first couple weeks. If you want to keep breast feeding try milk production snacks and drinks

They definitely are not his boobs…

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You can always do both

I get where he is coming from, breastfeeding is always best when it’s doable. Obviously there are situations where moms can’t breast feed and that’s absolutely okay, bottom line it’s YOUR BODY YOUR CHOICE. If you gave breastfeeding a try, found it was not working for you or your baby, then you have the right to stop. No one can take that decision from you!

You can do both! Drink tons of water. Nurse first and top him off with a small bottle!

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If you are not producing enough milk, the baby needs donor breast milk or formula. Does your husband want the poor baby to starve? While most parenting decisions should be made by both the parents, this is not one of them. The baby has to eat, feed however you can.

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Tell him you aren’t making enough milk, therefore the baby won’t get enough food. If he’s too much of an asshat to understand that, leave him.

Tell your husband to bog off

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He doesn’t have to agree. They’re not his boobs. But if you want, have your pediatrician call him to tell him that there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula.

I didn’t produce like at all and had to give my daughter formula. She’s reaching every milestone and is even ahead of other kids. She was never sick, always perfect. Your son would be fine with formula

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Id tell your husband until he has some boobs- only then can he tell you what to do in terms of breastfeeding. If you’re not making enough, I’d be more concerned that your baby may be hungry and not gaining weight properly. Maybe consider breastfeeding and combination feeding with formula. Also maybe expressing may be a good idea to see how much your baby is actually getting and make a forward plan from there xx

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Tell him if he’s so against formula HE can stimulate HIS own lactation and breastfeed the baby HIMSELF

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He’s not the one physically feeding it. It should be up to you.

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When you are done breastfeeding and the baby is still hungry simply hand the baby to daddy and tell him it’s his problem you did what you could

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I wasn’t producing enough with my first and ended up supplementing with formula while I took fenugreek and domperidone which helped increase my supply. I still fed both as my babe loved the bottle and it was most important to keep him fed in general! :slightly_smiling_face:
That’s prob the most important conversation babies need nutrition regardless if it’s breastfeeding or formula.

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Breast feeding is only best, if it’s best for both, mommy and baby. If your child isn’t getting enough, it can cause failure to thrive and loss of brain growth. Talk with your pediatrician AND a lactation consultant, with your husband present. He needs to be supportive, educated. And most importantly, under any circumstances, do not feel guilty. Your baby, on breast milk AND, OR formula, will be just fine. You’re doing great mama!!!

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Maybe both speak to a breast feeding specialist, so you both find out the info you need.

At this age it feels like your not making enough as the engorgement eases, but as much as it doesn’t seem if we are.
If there’s enough wees and poops baby is getting enough.
Many people start substitution with formulas around this stage which then decreases breast supply because it’s not getting the demand and ques from baby.

However you have to do what you feel is best, I have exclusively bf both my boys and it’s not easy, it’s tiring and sometimes you just want a break, but it’s also the best thing I have done.

If you both get guidance you will hopefully have a better understanding and he will be more compassionate.
Best of luck :heart:

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Breast is best only when its best for EVERYONE! Especially mama. The way I see it, if its causing you worry then baby may pick up on it, especially if you’re feeding a lot more often which is causing you exhaustion. I get that daddy’s want an equal input and I support that need but not at my own health and well-being. Fed is best, doesn’t matter where it comes from. Personally I only managed to exclusively breast feed for 4mth and then did a combination of both and it did both me and baby the world of good because we were both better rested for it. Yes, you’re both equal parents but its your body

It sounds to me like you planned on breastfeeding, but your body isn’t making enough for your baby. 1) it’s NOT your fault. 2) your husband should understand that you wanted to, but sometimes it doesn’t work that way, so he needs to be more supportive. And 3) if it’s something you feel you NEED to do, there are doctors and specialists that can possibly help. I am sorry you’re having to deal with this without the full support you deserve. I truly hope things get better for you. And there is absolutely no shame in supplementing with formula so long as your baby is fed, happy and above all, healthy!!

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This is right around the time your supply starts regulating, which makes a lot of women think they aren’t producing enough. If baby is gaining weight and having good diaper output, then your milk is fine :heart: that being said, there is nothing wrong with supplementing. Your husband doesn’t control your body. It is so draining to nurse a child, I just finished nursing my daughter at 20m old. Your husband needs to be understanding and empathetic of that fact. If you’re still wanting to breastfeed though, your local WIC office can be a huge help. They have lactation consultants, and of course there are lactation consultants outside of WIC as well. And definitely speak to babys pediatrician to make sure baby is gaining weight appropriately if you’re concerned :heart:

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I had same pressure, it was best I was a new mom. Pressure was always to breastfeed, i continued and was ill :face_with_thermometer: all the time. I ended up having blood blisters lead to infection & mastitis infection :tired_face:. I then got a kidney infection. Some of us are not made to breastfeed. If you or your baby are not doing well dont sacrifice either of your Health. 2 kids later I still got a fever and flu symptoms even though I didn’t breastfeed. Your job is to take care of you and that baby, do what is best for both of you.

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Ultimately it’s up to you. If you’re stressing you can’t produce anymore milk chances are you won’t bc of the stress. If you don’t want to, don’t force your body to. If you’re willing to try then looking into supplements to help improve your milk. It’s something that you need to decide on and not seek others opinions. It’s your body and if you’re not happy with doing so then you won’t be happy in the end. If you choose formula that doesn’t make you a failure. Remember that.

The baby is priority for most. He has to understand that. Maybe a dr can help him in this by explaining. I had only 3 months of milk then I went to formula. Last one was strictly formula due to meds I had to take after delivery. He will come around and let the dr and pediatrics know this. They can help him understand it. My ex was like this til my pediatrician talked to him. He can just deal with it. Baby needs food. It happens and to deal with it.

You do what’s best for your baby. If you want to continue breast feeding great but if you don’t feel your babies getting enough by all means use some formula. I felt so bad when I had to start using formula because I wasn’t producing enough. I continued to nurse as much as possible but supplemented with formula and eventually used formula entirely because I dried up. Anyway a fed baby is a happy baby.

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I wasn’t making enough milk and my child ended up severely malnourished. It was extremely serious. If you end up continuing without the formula back up, please consult the doctor and go regularly for checkups.

If you want to supplement, do it. Follow your gut! If something happens to baby, you will never forgive him or yourself.

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Dont give your husband enough food for a few days and see how he feels about basically putting a newborn on a diet. Feed/pump what you can and supplement as needed .

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Consult with a lactation consultant and make sure you really are not producing enough. The baby is your husband’s as well and it seems like he may just be trying to do what’s best nutrition wise. I love that my husband wants to be hands on and he makes EVERY decision with me concerning our babies. After getting confirmed through a lactation nurse that you really aren’t producing enough then I would do both. Still nurse for the health benefits and supplement as needed.

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Tell him to learn how to lactate and feed the kid himself if he’s got an issue with it…at the end of the day it’s whatever you’re comfortable with. No one can force you to breastfeed if you can’t or even if you just don’t want to. He should be supportive of either choice. Fed is best.

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If he isn’t being a jerk, I can see his concern and he may be coming from a place of lack of understanding. He may have heard the benefits of breast milk versus formula and he is worrying. Have him talk to the pediatrician if you don’t think you can get him to understand the need to supplement with formula.

It’s not about how the parents want it. It’s about the baby being fed. Nothing else is as important as that. Not your feelings, not his feelings.

I hope things smooth out for you. You’re doing great.

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Fed is definitely best,no doubt about it.
Does your husband not understand, that if you are not producing enough milk (and from what I understand this is actually pretty common, too, and if you poor thing have to stress about it the milk supply can dry up completely), that your child will be malnourished and not develop properly??
He needs to start understanding there is no shame or stigma in formula feeding, and that the health of your child and you, the mother, are the most important things.

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Pure and simple. He doesnt get to have an opinion on this until he can be the one producing the milk. If YOU want to continue you can always do half and half and shop sales/coupon if its a matter of affording the formula. He can either be a jerk or he can be a good husband and be supportive of whatever you choose, his option.

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Fenugeek tablets are great. Its normal for milk supply to drop at this stage. But quite frankly when it comes to feeding your baby you just have to do what’s best. Perhaps a medical professional could explain it to him at an appointment?

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Would he rather the baby go into a failure to thrive state? It’s no fault of your own, it happens. Put the baby first. Use formula if that’s what it takes. Best of Luck!

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you don’t need him to agree, If you cannot produce then your body cannot physically do anything more how is that your fault. I bottle fed my kids and it was my choice. He needs to wake up not everything works the way they imagine!

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When he can produce milk from his nipples is when he can have a say when you can stop.
:rage::rage:
Breastfeeding is hard work! There’s so many feeling we have to endure when we cannot produce milk and have to stop. Your husband needs to be more supportive.

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I don’t think how a baby is fed should be up to the man. He isn’t breastfeeding. He isn’t the one getting up at night most times. If you need to switch, then switch. Until he can lactate, he doesn’t get to demand that of you.

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Hum it’s not your husbands breast honey . And he had no idea how much milk your son is receiving on the other hand you know your baby and you know your body just tell him that’s it end of . Would he be swayed towards the breast for baby as he might be asked to make a bottle off even feed baby . Really your choice

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Ew no. Throw the whole damn man away. If he’s not lactating he doesn’t get a say. What a jerk. Feed your baby that formula and take care of them cause I promise they aren’t going to thank you one day for using your breasts or a bottle of formula to feed them. :heart: Your mental health is more important for 1 fact. For 2 you will not be able to walk into any classroom anywhere and point out who was fed what way so why would it matter how you feel them.

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Tell him to let a baby, then toddler with teeth suck on his nipple for 3 years and then he can give his two cents. Until then, you’re the mom, you have the boobs and it’s your body… if you’re done, then you’re done! He doesn’t make all the rules!

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I would listen to his actual reasons and counter those fairly if possible. It’s really, really not up to him though. Being fed is necessary. How is really up to mom. It’s literally a full time job just to breastfeed.

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You will produce enough over time… if you want tips please message me. I am an over producer and have a lot of good ways to make more milk. Ultimately, its up to you though if you want to formula feed or breastfeed. As long as baby is fed thats really all that matters.

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I admire the fact that he wants a healthy breastfed baby, but I’d tell him to go fuck himself it’s not up to him and there’s nothing wrong with formula :woman_shrugging:t2: a fed baby is a healthy baby no matter where it comes from!

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Tell him to breastfeed.tell him does he want the child to go hungry as long as the child is fed it shouldn’t matter . It’s nobody’s business how u feed your child.

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Tell him he needs to be breastfeeding round the clock too, if you gotta try with minimal output then so does he.

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Fed is best. I breastfed and my supply dropped and we went to formula. Which was the best thing we did because she ended up milk and soy protein intolerant. On formula she thrived, hubby got to feed her too and she was rarely ever sick. Her cousin was breastfed and ended up with ear infections and colds like crazy. Formula isn’t bad and it’s packed full of nutrients for their immune system. It’s ultimately your choice but whatever keeps your baby nourished is best.

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I’m sure this is in the comments but if you take him with to your doctor and he hears it from them then maybe that’ll help. I can’t imagine a scenario where my husband would make me breastfeed. Stress and anxiety from a partner can impact your supply so he should be more supportive.

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It’s your body which means you decide what you want to do with it. If you are not producing enough that could lead to a baby that is very hungry & as a by product of the hunger very cranky!

Tell him when he can produce milk with his nonexistent milk ducts he can tell you how much longer to nurse.

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Fed is best. If you are stressing yourself out and not producing enough then you have two options - substitute formula and continue breastfeeding or stop breastfeeding all together and it’s YOUR choice it’s literally no one else’s. #fedisbest

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You can try a power pump. 20 mins on 20 mins off 10 mins on 10 mins off. Also blue Gatorade and malt o meal worked for me. … BUT if you’re not producing enough then formula it is. They make it for a reason. We did half of each for awhile and at 9 months I stopped pumping altogether.

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Unpopular opinion here but if you know that baby is still hungry after you breastfeed, supplement regardless of his opinion. The babys needs surpass his opinion.

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Reglan is a drug your obgyn can prescribe. It helps you produce milk. It works!!! You will just about drown your youngun in milk. If you want to still breastfeed

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Put the baby on his nipple and tell him to feed it. And when he says he doesn’t have milk, tell him to keep trying cos he doesn’t want formula 🤦

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You are still in the early stages if you are willing to continue, you can amd will produce enough to your baby. If it is your wish too, latch your baby very often 10mins from 1 breast and 10mins on the other. Also eat carbs and drink lots of water and non alcoholic beer like bavaria. Over the counter vitamins like Pregnacare for breadt feeding mums helps a lot too. But it must be your wish!

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He sounds like a doofus saying you need to… if you aren’t producing enough then you need to make sure baby is fed another way… fed is best. You’re the mum just do it and tell him next time when he carries the baby for 9 months and has it latching on his tit he can decide.

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If the baby isn’t getting enough then it doesn’t matter what he wants. You gotta feed your baby

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Just do it. He cant stop you from changing. If it’s for babies health he should understand

Also explain to him that all kids either breast or formula fed turn out the same lol they all eat chicken nuggets and try to eat dirt at some point :joy:

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You just need a lactation consultant in my opinion. Breast milk is so important. A lot of women make excuses so they don’t have to breastfeed but in reality they just don’t know the tips and tricks to make it easier.

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Tell him you are not going to starve your baby. He either needs to educate himself more about feeding babies or trust your judgment.

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Well considering it’s YOUR body, his opinion is irrelevant. YOU decide whether or not you want to breastfeed. If he’s that concerned, tell him to start lactating and do it himself.

It is absolutely up to you. The only suggestion I can make is from my own experience. I also had problem with breastfeeding and felt that I’m not producing enough milk so I switched to pumping and it was game changing for me. Eventually in my pick I produced gallon of milk a day :weary::joy:… be careful what you wish for and good luck :+1:

You have to do whats best for the baby and you. If you cannot produce enough milk, then gradually change to the bottle. My mother care nurse said the above to me. She told me not to beat myself up about it because it wasnt my fault. That i had a crack, bubs got a good start, but now it was time to transition, for all our benefits. I was lucky to get to 3 months with all three of mine. The relief that i felt after she told me that was immense. You are a great mum, go on your instincts. Tell your hubby to hush up.

More concerned that you appear to feel you don’t have a choice, quite a bullying attitude to tell you you have to?. If you are not producing enough milk and do not supplement it your baby will be hungry and unhappy .

Tell him you will be starting formula for your son as he is hungry and not getting everything he needs and could become ill and malnourished. If you still want to breast feed do that and top up bubs with formula. Maybe try not feeding your husband enough and see how he feels.

Sorry. You "need " to. You can only do what you can do. You have 3 children and are probably exhausted. Give yourself a break and don’t let him make you feel guilty. Maybe try pumping when you are relaxed. You can’t "make " him agree with you either. He should be more understanding.

When your husband can lactate he can make those decisions but until then you call the shots. Feed your baby whatever you need to.

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A month into breast feeding my second baby. She had actually dropped under the weight she was when we had left the hospital and her pediatrician explained that she must not have been getting enough milk while feeding and that supplementing was severely important for her growth and overall health. Maybe try to explain it to him in that way? Breast feeding cant be best if the baby isnt getting enough.

It’s not up to him, this is one thing he doesn’t have a say in. You know your body and what you can do it’s ultimately up to you. Fed is beast, as long as your baby is feeding it doesn’t matter how the baby gets it

Explain if you keep breastfeeding whilst not producing enough you baby will get sick! My son was prem. I tried so hard but there just wasnt the milk to fill him. Had to go to formula to keep him healthy and alive!!

I don’t think you give enough info to get the right advice. Like why do you think you are not producing enough? Is baby gaining weight? But from my experience and knowledge I’ve picked up over the years is milk is supply and demand. The more you feed the more you produce. Have a look in to cluster feeding and also growth spurts. But if baby is putting on wieght then all is fine, if not it’s not necessarily because you are not making enough milk. I found the first 3 months hard! It was like I was constantly feeding. Then one day it just got easier and I no longer felt stuck to the sofa she would go 3 hours between feeds until she was on solids and again she would hold of longer until she no longer would feed in the day. But ultimately it’s up to you what you want to do its your body and breastfeeding is demanding, but can also be very rewarding. But if you decide to continue then maybe just get some help or support there are lots of good fb support groups. Good luck in what ever you decide hun.

Does he have the boobies to feed? No? Fuck him. You do what you need to to keep that kiddo fed. I under-produced with both mine and had to switch to formula full time after just a few months. A fed baby is best

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My mom was really upset that she wasn’t producing enough milk for me so just kept trying breastfeeding… And found out she was starving me by the doctors. Go with what doc says. Not dad.

Fed is best whether that be formula or breast milk. Let your husband know that you don’t need his sh*t and you’re doing what’s best for baby.

I wasn’t producing enough milk on my second born, so I combination fed her. She would breastfeed first then I would top her off with formula. We did this for 4 months till I got lazy :disappointed:. But there are many who have successfully done it for longer. X

you need to keep breast feeding and suplement with formula when you dont have enough that baby needs fed explain this to your husband he may not understand

A happy baby is a fed baby. I was t able to produce enough milk. In 4 days my son lost almost 1 pound. I supplemented with formula. I tried for 5 weeks producing less than an ounce in 12 hours. It was feed formula or my son would die. I chose formula and my son

It isn’t up to your husband. If he wants the baby to have breastmilk then he can go buy it from a milk bank.

Also, are you sure you’re not producing enough? If you want to continue and that is the sole reason you aren’t, ask questions in a breastfeeding group or speak directly to a lactation consultant. I only say this because I thought I wasn’t producing enough with my first but that really wasn’t the case and then felt guilty for a long time lol But he 100% does not get to decide what happens in this situation.

I used to give my son formula between breast feeds, he was such a hungry baby! Are you drinking enough water? Try upping your fluid intake to see if that helps, if not don’t beat yourself up over it, it’s your body and your husband needs to leave those decisions to you

I breast fed my first & second for a year with no problems.
My third & forth, my body wouldn’t produce enough milk. Both ended up loosing weight rapidly.
You can only do what your body allows. This then is no longer a choice. It’s a this is what we must do for this baby to live!!

Not his business. Your not producing enough milk to feed your baby. Do what right for your child.

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Bless ur heart. I got Mastitis with mine and couldn’t breast feed. Please don’t get in that position. It’s not good for u or the baby

If he doesn’t understand that you need to supplement, you have big problems!

Well until he starts producing milk he should not demand how your natural body works…

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Do what YOU FEEL IS BEST!!! NO ONE, NO ONE, being real person, spouse, so, should BULLY YOU into anything other than WHAT YOU FEEL YOU SHOULD DO!!! Baby needs to eat, YOU take care and feed baby in a way that’s best FOR YOU AND BABY!!! There’s no competition, no medal for who breastfeeds or formula feeds Baby!!!

If you don’t want to don’t do it. If you aren’t making enough you might consider some dietary changes. Pineapple, oatmeal, and lots of water help with milk production. Also, some medications can reduce milk supply.

when I give birth to my son at the hospital , formula milk is not allowed in the Philippines hospital and Im not producing any milk so my son keeps crying and crying and crying and my partner is very mad cause whats important is to feed the baby not starve the baby just because you really have to breastfeed some mothers dont produce milk nor enough milk :woman_facepalming:t2:very stressful we were at the hospital for 4days

Informed is best. Only about 5% of women actually don’t produce enough milk and the rest are struggling because of lack of help.
If YOU want to continue breastfeeding then go and see a professional, not a health nurse (most I’ve met are outdated and nasty) but a lactation consultant. The Australian breastfeeders page has been amazing also!