Honestly, why would you want to stay with someone who is cheating on you and justifies it with “But you did it first”?
Staying with someone purely because they support you financially sounds toxic
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Absolutely not. You won’t be happy and he is choosing someone else over his family. That’s not right. Leave. Let him figure his shit out with his child himself. I get you’re raising his kid too, but you’ll be happier with someone who chooses you not someone else
Dump that MFer and make your own money! #Bossupbabe
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What is your worth? People are going to try and treat you however they want. But what are you going to allow?
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I’m sorry, but you need some new “homegirls “ my love. Know your worth. If he loved you with his all, you would have his heart and you only. Please don’t let this keep happening. It’s going to just keep tearing you up inside. You deserve to be happy.
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Id flounce. The child isn’t your responsibility (if its his) give him the ultimatum or walk coz you’re being walked allover 
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You’re not married to him and his child is not yours, you can gladly go. OR stay and look dumb, be disrespected, be naive, allow him to treat you however he chooses, and you sit back and watch. Bullshit! You can do bad all by your damn self! Don’t stay in it for all the wrong reasons.
How old is this not bio son?
It’s just so much going on…this is absurd
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You are going to resent him and so will your child. There is so much damage in this relationship. Find someone else who will treat you like number 1 and not a side piece.
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So you’re raising his child while he goes about his life and takes advantage of you. Just to clear that up…
I don’t know you but I hope you deserve better and I hope you tell him to kiss your ass 
let that other lady take care of his kid lol
You are not losing anything. Point blank he does not give a shit about your feelings or how this is effecting you. He has made his decision so it is time to make yours. Either be ok with him having to side peace that he will eventually leave you for. Or leave him in the birt and let karma catch up to him.
What? No. You’re his baby sitter while he’s out living his best life?
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Hm first, I think you should get new friends lol. Who cares if he knows where home is he clearly ain’t coming home to you every night if he is going to see this girl and take her on vacation. He is stepping out of your marriage to be with another girl.
He is living two lives and using you to take care of your guys son but realistically his, not to say you don’t love the kid but literally he is using you as a live in babysitter and mom. Imagine how much love you can give someone who would actually appreciate that.
Get a job so you can support yourself and leave… you have no baggage, so divorce him and go.
I think you know the answer and what to do you just don’t want to leave since he hands you everything and your friends are telling you the same thing… respect and love yourself enough to let him go and financially take care of yourself, you don’t need a man for that.
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You’re willing to stay with a cheater because he pays all the bills and you don’t have to work? Girl wake the f*** up
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What in the ever lovin’
Girl you should just peace out while hes on vacation. Empty the house of whats yours and be gone.
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Kick him to the curb…
Staying should not be a thing. That isn’t something you should ever put up with.
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So you don’t work, to take care of HIS child? You’ve given up financial independence to be supported by your man who is cheating, and basically doesn’t gaf if you go or stay. He’s not going to give hee up for you, so either agree on an open relationship or get a job, save, and leave. You’ll eventually find happiness, woth pr without a man, once you start working on yourself and building yourself back up.
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Let the other woman raise his kid! He’ll keep doing what you allow him to do! Big nope for me.
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I would open a separate bank account with just your name on and start putting money in it… don’t do a transfer of funds either. Withdraw the cash and then do a cash deposit into your account. And hide the new banking info at like work, or your moms house. Once you’ve enough to move BOUNCE. It might take a year to collect enough money so you can put money down on your own apartment and get utilities turned on. But do it… you deserve it!!!
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Is this for real? Or is this a joke? Seriously…do you not value yourself? Don’t put up with that crap, you’re married so get alimony and he can still pay your bills… here will just have to get his side chick to raise his child. How pitiful… you are better off on your own. And yes, your friends are not the ones to go to.
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You already lost him and he already left you. At this point he’s taking advantage of whatever you’ve been offering so if you’ve been taking care of that little boy of his, it’s probably the only reason he’s keeping you around. You’re a free nanny.
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Oh hell no! Bye! You’re worth way more than putting yourself through the mess. Forget that. Sounds like he will continue to do this, and expect you to still be there, and care for his son. He can do it! No way, would I watch my hubs kid while he goes around like that. She can take care of both of them!
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He’s not gunna leave - why would he ! He has someone to watch his kid and clean his house so he can go and have fun with another chick with no strings attached - he’s living a great life- he’s f@ckin u over
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Oh hells to the no… that boy would be shown the door
Your nuts to stay half is yours . I would never lower myself to be a nothing
Start stashing 
get a good attorney and leave him before he decides his side b is going to be his main b!
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Your lowering yourself for this??? Come on now. I raised a 3 and 5 year old on my own. He made dam good money but you know what I have values, I respect myself and so…I started fresh. He thinks because he flashes money I’m tied to stay LMAO never!
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So you take care of HIS child while he goes see someone else? This is a no brainer. He had better make good money for you to consider staying lol
You deserve someone who wouldn’t do thay to you.
No way girl. You do you.
Fuck that!! Leave!! Know your worth!! It ain’t worth it!!
No one can speak for you. Like that’s what I can’t stand about these Facebook “advice” parts. This is your relationship with your husband, if it’s an issue then it’s something that you have to figure out whether or not you can live with honey. It’s not a matter of what other people believe is right or wrong because they wouldn’t do it in their relationship, and given this is a bigger one but still the same concept. This is something that you’ll have to work through with your mind and your heart to figure out where YOU stand on it.
When I’m in a spot like this in a relationship I ask myself “If they would have shown this in the beginning would I have perused it as I did?” My answer from that takes me to my decision.
Best of luck honey, I’m not hating on you or anything just to be clear I was just talking lol. I don’t hate that people come for advice I just don’t care that people give advice into stuff that they only get a piece of, you know? Idk just wanted to make sure you knew I wasn’t judging or anything like that hun! 
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Start saving money … His money and you will get child support too. He will keep doing it even if he with someone new. You’ll feel better after leaving
Move on he needs to respect you and obviously he’s not if he’s cheating on you. You and your son both deserve better then that.
Are you really losing anything, though? Monetary possessions can be replaced. Self-respect is hard to rebuild. NEVER let anyone treat you like this. If he was confident enough to tell you about the girl, and not in a remorseful way but in a haha nothing you can do about it way, he will not stop. He is sure you’ll put up with it. He doesn’t respect you, and I can not be with someone who does not respect me or our relationship enough to protect it. Mistakes happen, and people do stupid things, and if they’re truly sorry, I’m all for forgiving them, but he’s not sorry; he thinks it is acceptable. Unless you’re okay with an open marriage, it is NOT Okay. I’d leave.
LOL raise his kid while he takes another girl on vacation 
c’mon you know the answer
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Ma’am if you don’t walk your happy ahh out the door and rebuild for your happiness and health. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ?
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Nothing you say will convince him you haven’t cheated, because he knows it and is using it to “justify” having a side piece. Get out now. You deserve better
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Run and don’t look back He’s not even sorry so no he won’t change. You should be the one he’s taking on vacation
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You deserve better than this
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Girl you need to bounce. Being married and being in an open relationship are 100% different. Sounds like your his baby sitter, house keeper and peice off ass when he comes home.
Give your head a shake 
you’re watching his child while he cheats on you.
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Are you kidding me you need a good therapist and get self esteem and know your worth!
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what a lucky man. 
Woman, please don’t be a blessing to that son af a b**ch. God, I really hate swearing 
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Honey you need to walk away. He’ll only get worse. And you deserve better
Ew. Really? You don’t want to lose him? You need to find your own power and know your worth. Leave him. Let him lose YOU.
If money is a concern, go with comment above. Start stashing it. Talk to an attorney. You could potentially fight for visitation or step parent rights with his son. But you need to get away from this guy.
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Why in the world is this even a question you would have to ask!?!? Think more of yourself and get out!
Start : hoarding and banking 
A tad a time - after you build up some nest egg , make sure you are on any pensions , life insurances - then you walk my dear . Timing is everything . Oh and stay away from his wandering zanker
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Wtf did I just read 
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I’m so convinced yall be trolling at this point lol wtf 
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Figure out your worth and if you feel that you are worth a lot more than being treated like an option or a doormat, then you will know what to do.
Girl ? No you deserve more
I would not allow he will continue to do what he want and you are allowing him to
Lol read that again and then see how stupid it sounds. Obviously LEAVE HIM.
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Um girl, no. Self respect goes a long way. You’re raising his child while he’s having sex with another woman. What???
Run. You can’t justify wrong. You deserve better.
Are you ok with being an option!? Would he be ok if you had an occasional fling!? Save some money in your own account, and move on, you and your child deserve better
Leave his ass what the hell is wrong with you
Personally you need to have some self respect and boundaries. You’re not one to be polygamous and he would have to be OK with you having relationships yourself and I bet he wouldn’t be. You’ve given him a lot and you’re pretty much a glorified baby sitter. Seek out a domestic violence advocate. It may not seem like it but this is abuse as he is counting on you to just mentally deal with his bs he’s mentally abusing you and could possibly give you sexual diseases. You can have it all, just not with him!
This is a joke, right?!
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Girl c’mon now. You can’t be make yourself a victim. Of course he’s going to blame you, he’s playing with you. Slowly start putting some of the money away and get yourself a plan to get out of his life and live your own. You got this I promise you 
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KNOW YOUR WORTH!!! You are basically his live in Nanny for his child. RUNNNNNNNN
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Tell him to kick rocks take him to court make him pay for your housing and child support! Know your worth !
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(Sorry…Man chiming in here)
Get rid of him immediately!..if he loved you, or had a shred of basic respect for you, OR…had an ounce of character, he wouldn’t do this.
Men who have RESPECT, and LOVE, for their Wives, and Girlfriends, DO NOT act in this fashion.
Also, you must have RESPECT, and LOVE , for YOURSELF!!!..
DON’T EVER treat yourself with any less dignity!
I would NEVER even THINK of treating my wife this way.
Dump him immediately…
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Soon he’ll be putting y OUT! The door
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WTF did I just read?
Woman wtf are you thinking? Is there no fight in you? No pride? No sense of self worth?
Let me help you with that. Get up, and walk the fu€k away from that trash you call a husband. Why? Cuz you deserve better. You’re a queen, and queens don’t mingle around with filth. Time to clean it up. Don’t cause a scene, don’t fight the side bit€h. Just go. It’s going to hurt for a minute, but after, your whole world will be better.
… there’s so much more I want to say, since women submitting and accepting this nonsense drives me insane but I’m gunna tone it down. GOOD LUCK.
You already lost him.
Pick yourself up, put on your big girl panties, regain your dignity by walking away.
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Sue her for alimony and dip out 
find your peace girl. Or just find you a side piece too fuck it open Season. Summer is coming
Yeeeeaaaa no. You really need to start loving yourself more. Kick him to the curb.
Not many will like or agree with what I am about to say- I sure didn’t and I secretly pittied this woman but it did give me an understanding into why some women stay and put up with this ( I never thought I could but my financial position right now, I absolutely would just have a break from this stress) — This woman told me that she envied me for my strength to be content in my struggles living pay check to pay check never depending on anyone else. She stays in an unhappy marriage because if she did not she would have to start again. Tho their bed was cold and deep down she was no longer happy with “him” she loved her life. She didn’t want to give up her big house for a small crappy apartment she could make look nice but it wouldn’t be near what she was use to. She didn’t want to give up going out for lunch’s and dinners, she couldn’t fathom living on assistance or a small single income well she climbed the job latter. She said he would never let have what she wanted and probably just get her personal belongings because he has the money for a good lawyer. Before she could get anything they would have to legally separate and she would have to leave the house. She didn’t know if he cheated and she didn’t want to either. She told me she may not be happy with him but finds much happiness in her lifestyle and friends…. I told her I would take money over love any day, this was 7 years ago. They still do things as a couple with friends they still travel she still lives a pretty great life. She goes on trips with the girls to the closest bigger city. —— the last 3 years have truly made me re consider my statement. I’m not sure what I would truly do in that position anymore. Would I put my pride above well being? Would I be able to look the other way and continue on with life? I know either would eat me up inside…… what will hurt less.?? I need to think long and hard. You should seek professional help to weigh your pros and cons and what they TRULY mean to you. Everyone can say what they would do, in high school the same girl above stated she would never stay but she did. She has done what she feels is best for her at this time. Sometimes she’s sad but most times she can go on with her life. Only you can do what is right for you—- BUT I will say if he ever starts hitting you, or gas lighting you absolutely get help and leave please,
Just depends on the type of woman you are I guess 
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Um… Your “home girls” ain’t sh*t number one for telling you to stay in that!! Two, you are raising a child that is not yours which is great and how it should be IF he was not stepping outside the marriage, but HE IS IN FACT CHEATING ON YOU! I cannot believe this is a question… You are a better woman than I am! That is all. Let side “B” raise the child. WOW!
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Do you live in a state where infidelity is still illegal? Because I’d be going down that route as long as I had proof so I’m covered. You would get alimony or a percentage from an actual judge.
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Pppftttt I’d be OUT
unless you’re allowed a side piece too, then nope!
Oh so you’re taking care of HIS SON while he fucks around on you? Honestly sounds like you need to lose him & should want to.
He’s taking this chick on VACATION while you what? Do HIS laundry? Cook HIS dinner? Take care of HIS kid?
Cut your losses & leave w some dignity.
Sooo. I’m gonna be the odd ball.
Everyone has different boundaries and not everyone follows a typical marriage scenario. I think it’s wrong of him that this wasn’t discussed with you prior and he just did what he did though.
This is a very personal choice for YOU. Do you want a man dedicated to only you or are you ok with an open relationship? You also need to consider that if he’s sleeping with other people this is a risk factor for STDs and potentially another child.
My marriage follows the typical marriage ideation, but not everyone’s does. But no matter what you follow, you need trust and complete open, honest communication.
You need to get a side piece too if you choose to stay cause F that! That’s what I would do if my husband told me this and I didn’t want to leave. Same old story though…Waiting to Exhale! Watch that scene with Angela Bassett and learn a thing or two.
Hell no! If he’s your husband and he’s kept this “hidden” infront of your face, he’s a shitty human. He choose another woman over you, and you’re wondering if you should stay? NOOO!!! AND taking her on vacations! My trust would be completely gone.
I’m so sorry!
The most dangerous thing a woman give up is her independence. You need to take some back.
Whether you do this by getting a part time job now or straight In to
Full time employment is up to you.
But you either do it now, or when he drops you on your ass later.
I’m what if he brings the gift that keeps giving home from this other girl? Know your worth!! You are a queen and should be treated as such.
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Know your self worth. You deserve better.
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Wow i would never stay and settle for that shit no matter how much i love my husband that’s bullish leave now before it gets worse run gurl run as fast as u can 
If he is looking he will leave when he is ready and will not give a rats butt about you
Based on what you wrote you’ve already made the decision. You have to live with it no one else.
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I’d B seein him to the door but really leave if your not ok with this. He’s going to continue obviously he doesn’t care about how you feel on cheating or having a side because he went out and did it good luck!
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I really need to just unfollow this page at this point because these posts are wiiiiild
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Is this a joke? Definitely plan to leave… however you can stick around long enough to cash in a little. He sounds well off and if he wants to play you then you can play him too. Let him pay for you to get your real estate license or a degree or start a business…Start stacking his money in an acct that he doesn’t know about… save it for when you’re ready to go. Shit, even get yourself a side piece for when he’s vacationing with his 
two can play that game girl
I can’t even take this right now… the stuff some women allow men to do to them so they are taken care of financially… get a job and take care of yourself and get some self respect.
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Anything forced or hurtful doesn’t feed your purpose.
I never say this but Leave! he obviously doesn’t care about you he’s not even trying to hide it from you because he doesn’t care if you leave or stay.
That isn’t your son so you have literally no reason to stay
Leave before you accidentally get pregnant by him and you feel like you have to stay for the baby
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You need new friends too!!
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Main B? No. Your suppose to be the only one, married?? Unless discussed and agreed upon w stepping out the OG relationship, he’s cheating. Does he take his son (you said not your bio) on vacations with his side chic? No? Your a babysitter for him to be stepping out. Time for you to pack up and let him continue with his side chic
Sounds like you’re the side “B” and a live in nanny and maid at that
You are the maid, nanny and side piece. If you are okay with that well ok.
Document it all. Catch him admitting it in a text. It’ll make divorce and ect easier.
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Love yourself first.
You deserve so much better than him show him the door
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I’m not judging in the least bit, but your status seems very detached already. The fact he has taken her on vacations already denotes he has taken time away from you… in places relaxing without you… so that doesn’t make a lot of sense to me… you seem to not be “heart broken” over it and torn apart… more like an inconvenience and a shot to your pride…
This is my advice to your individual situation… (not something I could do but just pertaining to THIS status based on how it is written)
Figure out if you’re ok with an open marriage… if he’s going to do what he’s going to do anyways, and you already seem like you don’t want to lose the financial security he brings, and your bonus son, then you have to dig deep and lay down some ground rules that pertain to both parties on the marriage.
Will he ONLY be seeing this one other person? Or casually dating other people? Are you allowed to do the same? Etc. I mean redefining the nature of your marriage may in the long run help strengthen it. Then again you may be given the freedom to find someone else while still maintaining the financial security. (In essence having your cake and eating it too)
I mean, he’s got a girlfriend… why can’t you find yourself a boyfriend?
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You’re not losing everything because of someone your husband chooses to go see on an occasion. Your husband did this. It’s easy to blame the mistress and it’s understandable why you are so upset but the person you really need to be focusing your anger at is your husband. The one who took a vow to love and honor you forever and who broke those vows. He knew what he was doing. Now, you need to pick up your crown and get yourself out of this. He does not deserve your loyalty or love and he’s proven that he has no respect for you.
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