So get the hammock for yourself for Mother’s Day because you deserve it. Don’t honor him on Father’s Day either as you are not his father!
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Our minister said it best, all women are motherers ,even if you haven’t given birth. We love, nurture and take care of everyone around us because that is how God designed us! So even if your husband doesn’t acknowledge it, you are a Motherer and deserve some recognition!
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My ex and I, encourage our children (aka make them lol) recognize each parent on Mother’s & Fathers Day. Last year I got a Lego board with I love you mom written out on it from my son. (He’s 9, and he’s VERY MUCH into legos:)) My daughter sketched a favorite photo of us in pencil (she is an artist, she’s 17- and that’s her thing) That means so much more to me than a physical gift from their dad. I appreciate his effort, and he appreciates mine. It shows the kids you don’t need to buy someone a gift to make them feel special and appreciated. You need to care enough to do something for them.
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My husband says so, but I tell him he should teach his kids to appreciate their mom. He doesn’t argue back, to be honest, but he doesn’'t get me anything either 
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My husband told me that and I was offended and it hurt so every mothers day when his family gets together to celebrate his moms mother’s day i go out out of town mind you my grown children always give me gifts but when he asks if I’m going. I say No and keep it moving. My mother is in heaven and knows my heart but I will not be disregarded and on fathers day I call my brothers and male friends and wish them Happy Father’s Day but him .No . I can make you feel the same!!!
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I think it’s weird to expect a gift for any situation. No one should ever expect a gift unless explicitly told to expect one. I see nothing wrong with your husband’s mindset & at least he’s honest that he doesn’t want to get you one instead of getting you one just to make you happy & wishing he didn’t.
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My ex told me that the whole 19 years we were together. While it’s true I wasn’t his mother I was the mother of his children. IMO it’s a insight of how he really feels about you and your relationship. Come Father’s Day he will except you to get him something even tho he’s not your dad!
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I think until the kids can go out and get their own gift, dad should help and set an example on how to treat their mother. I don’t expect diamonds and expensive gifts. I’m happy with flowers for the garden and a homemade card.
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Well tell him he isn’t getting anything for Father’s Day since he’s not your dad . But seriously he could of get your flowers to brighten up your day cus your the mother of his child/children .
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My hubby always asked what I wanted. It wasn’t because I wasn’t his mom. I was the mother our 2 kids. This will be my first Mothers Day without him. He passed away Dec. 2020.
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Anyone who’s husband tells the mother of their child this is not worthy of being a man/husband. It is the husband who is to show his children how to treat a woman and their mother, mother of their child/children, Aunt Niece, Grandmother, sister that they are to be treated with Respect, Love, Kindness, and that gifts are one of showing that. He is to show them how to buy flowers, cards, gifts, or make home made gifts.
Since he has told you this do not do anything special for him on father’s day.
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I guess I was raised by a truly exceptional father. He bought my mom gifts right up until they passed away and he bought mother’s day gifts for all 4 of his daughters every year after we became mothers until he passed away.
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Go on strike as mom this week and see if he doesn’t appreciate your mothering his children 
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He’s right. You are not his mom but he is the father to young children. He should be making sure the kids do for you!!
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My ex said that to me on my first Mother’s Day, which was only about a week after our son was born. After just having gone through carrying his child, labor and delivery, I was really hurt by his comment.
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He is right your not his mom but he is responsible for buying gifts from the children that’s how they learn to respect their mom if not Father’s Day will be a bust
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I am so sorry but I would find that completely thoughtless and not acceptable. You are the mother of his children and he needs to be teaching them to honor their mom. If he treats you this way, I’d remember it on Fathers Day and not do a single thing for him. Then have a chat about how it feels to be disregarded.
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He is right! You are not his mother, but he should take the kids out to pick out something for you from them. If you didn’t have any kids, it would be different. Just remember what he said when it Fathers Day!
Ok you’re not his mother but you are the mother of his children. It’s his job to help them celebrate you. That’s ridiculous!
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If you are the Mother of his Children…he’s insensitive and rude. And, certainly not appreciative.
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Tell him next time he wants something to eat or his clothes washed " I’m not your mother!!
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Well say the same back to him when Father’s Day rolls around see what his reaction will be
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My ex told me the same thing. One of the many reasons he is an ex
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I didn’t want my husband to get me anything for Mother’s Day before we had kids. I am not his mother!! After kids, yes. He should help my kids buy me something since they aren’t able to shop on their own. ,
My husband told me that a few years ago. We have 5 children and I’ve always gotten him something. Now I go get myself something because I deserve it. My children are all grown and they do stuff for me but I was hurt by his remark.
Reading this and the comments of those who think this is ok makes me so sad. I’m sorry but my husband would NEVER dream of saying something like this to me. I’m sorry but there’s no way in hell I’d put up with that. YOU DESERVE BETTER!!! You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. Stop allowing this kind of treatment.
Hopefully you have a shared bank account & you go buy yourself the best damn hammock you can find!!
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I think husbands should buy their wives something for Mother’s Day cause she is the Mother of his children and a wife should buy her husband something for Father’s Day to
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I think he’s a tool and you need to run fast while you can. Anyone who can’t acknowledge the mother of his children’s on Mother’s Day is the worst kind of father. And women who have been ok with this have really set their standards low.
My kids are 11 8 and 7 and I enjoy the gifts they make in school. Their father and I are not together and he always buys me elaborate gifts, I tell him he doesn’t have to do that, the kids don’t have money and I’d rather they all spend the time making me cards and stuff maybe some flowers
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Every relationship is different, my hubby never misses a Mother’s Day, but he works 12 hour shifts and we are on opposite schedules. I’d give up every gift if we could be together daily.
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Your husband needs to realise that the gift is not from him, its from the kids you are raising with him. Teaching them gratitude for all you do as their mum.
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Then remind him of this on father’s day. Don’t get him anything and when he questions it, tell him- well, you’re not my father
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I never want anything other than not making dinner and quiet but let’s face it…that’s hard to come by with 3 crazies.
I’m sorry I’m not giving you what you need. You could always take your son shopping and he can make you a card. It could just be your husbands dad never bought his mother anything and it was up to him. Enjoy your weekend regardless 
Last weekend my miss 8 spent the weekend with her dad, then tried to sneak something inside but her big mouth kept asking me when mother’s day was and that she had a present for me but I am not allowed to go looking.
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My husband has said the same thing to me every year on Mother’s Day and it’s so hurtful. My children are 2 and six. It would be nice if he and them ever got me anything. But every year I get nothing. This year I made reservations for lunch because I refuse to spend another year cooking!
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HE doesn’t owe you a gift, but he should take the kids out so they can get you something for Mother’s Day. That’s how I see it.
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He’s your children’s parent/step parent, he should be getting the gift you want. Having them help wrap it out, maybe older ones pickup something small/in budget for you.
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I agree that he shouldn’t get you anything because you’re not his mom, however your kids are too young to do it for you so he should get you something from the kids
My hubs said that to me one year… I told him that that’s not fair because all mothers matter. If they’re your mother or the mother of your kids. Granted I didn’t say it that nicely, but it got the point across. Since then he’s always done something for me, and his step mom too.
Im a single mom an have been since the birth of my son 9yrs ago but my parents always take my son for any occasion an let him pick something out an he loves it an I’m thankful that he has that bond wit them like that
Yea I’d be pissed. My husband calls all of the women in his family. He always gets me something and helps me get gifts for our moms and grandmas. We also usually take my older kids to pick out a card for their stepmom. Father’s Day is the same for him, I get him something and all the men in our lives. Mothering is about so much more than giving birth.
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sounds like his mama didn’t raise him right. You’re a mother and definitely deserve something nice for Mother’s Day! I would be really upset if that was my husband…I hope you don’t get him anything for Father’s Day:neutral_face:
Does he get something for Father’s day? Is he your father? Remind him that your kids are watching how you treat each other, and one day that’s how they will treat their significant other. Would he approve of your daughters being treated like that one day. My husband and I got married when my daughter was 2. He always does something for me for mothers day. He doesn’t even have to get you anything. Just to do something to show his appreciation to the mother in his life. Even if you’re not *his mother. Sounds like he needs to grow up and respect you more.
Could had been just kidding to not ruin the surprise. But if he really felt that way tell him the same damn thing for fathers day.
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Rude! I’m not married but my guy gets me something and we don’t even have a child together. Also my dad gives me a gift every year, this year I got a cordless drill because I mentioned I wanted one. However he treats mother’s day for you, do the same for fathers day!
We do that. I’m not his mother & he’s not my father. These have gotten way off from the original intention which was to honor your mom! There are birthdays, anniversaries , Valentine’s Day! Those are to do for each other. Keep Mother’s Day & Father’s Day to their true meaning!
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I just tell him exactly what I want from my kids. I am a true believer that men are not mind readers. I learned to communicate really well. My parents are horrible communicators so I learned from them. Ask for what you want and if you still do not receive it then you can be upset.
Mine doesn’t “understand why so much emphasis is put on one day” and yet his father’s days are always awesome. He even got a car for mother’s day one year.
You are the mother of his kids. There would be no kids for him w/out. He should celebrate the fact you gave birth to those kids. Yes, he needs to gift his mother- but you are equally important!
Your kids need him to help celebrate you as well, considering their ages.
If he still refuses, buy yourself the hammock & thank the kids. Then do absolutely nothing when Father’s Day rolls around.
I think my response would be “and you’re no longer my husband.”
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Actually, I agree with your hubby. You are NOT his mother…and just the suggestion he get you the “hammock” as a GIFT is ludicrous and insulting to all mothers’. As a “mother”…a gift of flowers along with an affectionate card seems more sincere and appropriate…as well as being celebrated with a nice dinner out.
I think when the children are so little, it’s the least he can do to acknowledge the holiday. Once they are older, reminding them & helping them is appropriate. It’s true you aren’t his Mother, but you have a huge role as Mother to his children
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It’s about teaching children how to treat people. Respect and kindness. Yes your not his mom but it’s not like the children can shop for you. I also know 4 children is allot of work. You deserve to be recognized on Mother’s Day. He should be teaching them by example to value and appreciate their mom and all the good people in their lives.
I’m wondering if you buy for him on Father’s Day? Obviously he’s not your dad. I always bought for my husband and my father. I call my brother in law and nephew and give them a shout out.
Come on buddy. Get her the hammock and let the 4 children give it to her. You’ll be making 5 people really happy. You’ll probably find some instrinsic gratification somewhere along the way as well.
Happy Mother’s Day 
Lori
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My husband told me that when my kids were that age. Unfortunately for me it meant that he was cheating and didn’t want to show me any affection bc he was too infatuated with someone else which made him resent having to be with me:/
My husband tells me this every year. I can’t feel but a little hurt. I spent 9 months creating your pride and joy and then another 13hrs pushing him out! Then spent years accepting my new body! Bend the knee now!
My husband goes out of his way to celebrate me on Mothers Day when I would like to just skip it. I am not making this comment to rub it in. I just can’t imagine being with someone so miserable they wouldn’t want to celebrate the mother of their children. I seriously can’t even wrap my head around it. To all you ladies who have to put up with this, I hope he treats you like the queen you are the other 364 days a year. Because YOU deserve it!
I always bought my own Mother’s Day gifts because of that reason. I think it’s wrong that some people don’t get their partners/mother to their children something for Mother’s Day in my opinion. Doesn’t even have to be anything of monetary value. Not for birthday or Christmas or any other holiday either. He did give me PTSD though.
While the gift doesn’t need to come from the husband (he’s right, you’re not his mother), he should help the littles pick something out or show them something you said you wanted. He buys it, but it’s from the kids. Also, does he do anything for his own mother?
All that said, it would be nice if my husband actually took the reins once in a while on mother’s day…but he doesn’t, never has. For the past years, I’ve helped out kids prep my mother’s day gift.
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Well it makes sense you are not his mother but you both have a child so your his sons mother that means he should buy you the hammock or go buy it yourself for a gift for yourself you are a mother he needs to to realize that you are his child’s mother my husband gives me money and flowers to go buy something for myself 
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However you are the mother of his children and he should be so grateful for you carrying them and raising them! However mine has also said the same . Gets me nothing but a card for Mother’s Day. And yes it’s insulting.
If he doesn’t teach them to treat you on Mother’s Day then guess what…he’s not your dad on Father’s Day. 
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Why do you need a store bought gift? It about your children going out of their way showing you how much they appreciate you, not who spends the money.
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My honey doesn’t get me anything, but he takes our son shopping for me
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This is so disheartening, you mother his children… PERIOD. That is a very very selfish mentality. Mothering and rasing kids is the most important job, as well as teaching your kids how they should treat their mom. Mothers day is to honor ALL moms. No matter who they are. If I received that comment from my hubby I would tell him to make sure is mom knew to do his laundry still… and clean his house… and cook him meals. BUT we are all different and all live very different lives. 
Happy Mothers day to you all!
My kids are 21 and 16, and when they were small my husband worked too long of days to be able to take them shopping and would also tell me the same thing … that he wasn’t my mother. Honestly never bothered me because he always made sure the kids acknowledged and told me happy mothers day. Once they got old enough the kids take care of it themselves. But to be angry over a stupid day, that let’s be honest is really for the greeting card industry, is kind of petty. I mean unless your household is absolutely horrid, it’s not like you’re not respected, appreciated and loved the rest of the year. At least that’s the way it is at my house. Same for fathers day.
He better get you what you want. You are the mother of his young children. So he better be grateful for you.
I heard the same thing from my dad (step-dad) when father’s day came around and he asked me “what are you getting me for father’s day” I said “nothing your not my father” it hurt his feelings same for me when he said it because if he was alive now when my sister was finally a mom he definitely would of bought her something when my boys were younger he always made sure they bought me a card but I never got anything from him or my mom so my advice is tell him the same thing he told you “nothing your not my father” when father’s day comes just make sure your children celebrate mother’s and father’s day with your both and don’t say it in front of your kids if your husband is the jackbutt he sounds like they’ll figure that out on their own when their older
Here’s the thing he doesn’t have to get you a present per se but he should be helping the kids make you a card possibly a breakfast or special treat 
. He needs to know this is a teaching moment for your children and how they should treat their mother!!
Ya my narcissistic ex said that to me. My current knight in shining armor, whom I have no biological children with, treats me like a princess on Mother’s Day. That’s good enough explanation of why one is an ex and one is a keeper!
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I’m shacked up with boyfriend of 5 years, I have 2 from previous marriage. He has no children. I dont get mothers day gifts because I ain’t his momma and he didn’t make me a momma 
I just laugh
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My EX husband who is the father of my children still gets me gifts and I get him Father’s Day gifts. Just seems like the right thing to do
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My fiancee says the same thing. My son is from a previous relationship and even at that I get nothing from him, his father doesn’t get me anything nor does my fiancee. I pretty much hate almost all holidays bc it’s like tht for me
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He sounds rude, but we know very little about their situation. Maybe he’s in charge of the money, etc and knows they don’t have funds for unneeded items. My advice is…Gifts are material things. Head for making memories instead. Plan a day for yourself with the kids. Maybe a picnic lunch in the backyard or at the local park. Or if the weather isn’t going to be good, maybe a day full of movies and games together. Take pics and laugh and smile all day. Happy mother’s day to all!!!
My husband told me the same thing… You are not my mother, I am not getting you a gift! He is my ex-husband now🤣
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I don’t care about the gift as much! A good word will do! But even this ur spouse failed to do! That would be heartbreaking!!
If I’m you, I’ll literally take a whole day and a night off without him nor the kids! Book a night somewhere order food in, sweets, wine or whatever u want to do!
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My husband said this to me one year. It didn’t go well. He hasn’t said it since and buys me something every year since. We have a 20 year old daughter together. Hopefully he wises up and doesn’t say that again to you. I hope you get something nice, because you deserve it! Happy Mother’s Day in advance! 
Yeah… so when he wants stuff a mom would do… don’t do it. You aren’t his mother but are the mother of his children… he should treat you like a queen! And all those little ones too!
When the kids are that young the dad fills in for them, allowing them to give something to their mom, even if he is the one buying or helping them make gifts. I would have hurt feelings. When the kids grew up, I let my husband off the hook.
Its a bit closed minded of him to just say that, does he expect the kids to pop out and get you something? I buy my kids dad presents for fathers day on their behalf because they couldn’t do it other wise. I don’t usually get a present on mothers day which doesn’t really bother me but if I had spoken to him about wanting something I would be upset with that reply.
Stop making his lunches, your not his mum 
Uh your children are too small to get gifts for you for Mother’s day and so it should be his responsibility to take them to get you something. He doesn’t have to say it’s from him, although of course we all know he did it. Its from the kids. My dad has always helped my son get me a gift for Mother’s day since he was a baby
just tell him he doesn’t have to get you anything for mother’s day. Tell him you’re taking the day off since it’s your day and stick him with the kids all day long on his own… take a bath and drink a glass of wine behind a locked door. Go out to eat with a friend. Go for a drive or take a nap… do nothing at all but sit and watch Netflix while eating chocolate. Remind him that your day off is FREE and then thank him at the end of the day for reminding you that you didn’t need a gift for mother’s day and the time to yourself was much needed.
then… go buy that hammock any time you want just because you can.
He needs to think of it as he is not getting you anything but he is getting it for your kids to give to their mother.
I understand why men think this way and I dont think they do it intentionally to upset you. Its just the way their brain works. Just a very matter of fact way of thinking. But he needs to show the kids how to appreciate someone on a special day for them. You are the mother of his kids, there for, he needs to celebrate you on at least this one day. Good grief how hard is it to buy your wife something she wants.
I was married and had three children then new partner and had another 3 I’ve never once recieved anything off either not off them or the children through them. But had cards that the kids made at school which I cherish more even though it was part of schooling. My older kids still don’t bother to this day. I try spoil my mum, as she’s the only one I will have xxx I’m use to it but does hurt a little when you see others being appreciatedxxx I agree not their mothers and it’s not about gifts more about the appreciation which shouldn’t just be one day!
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He’s not wrong but he needs to ask the 5 and 3 year old what they want to do/get. I swear with some of these husbands/fathers, women need to find happiness within themselves. It’s Mother’s Day so I say spend the day with your kids and soak in what the day truly means. Gifts or no gifts…
Time to go get yourself a hammock 
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What a turd! Sorry not sorry. I mean if money is an issue, helping the kids make a homemade card would be awesome! They’re personally my favorite. You’re the mother of his child, he should set a better example. Also, I feel he should help make a card or gift for the mother of his other children. That’s just my opinion though.
Just because you are not his mother does not meam you are not a mother. You should be appreciated by him for being a mother to both your children. Parenthood is a lot of work and being shown appreciation for all you did is wonderful. Although it should be done more than just on Mothers Day. I am glad my husband shows me all the time.
Honestly I would buy my own gift that’s what i did when i was a single mom… and told my daughter it was from her for mother’s day… she made me a card and all was well… if he wants to be that way…do the same on fathers day
I would just get your kids, all of them and say happily it’s Mother’s Day the day we get to celebrate that I am your momma. If they ask what ppl do to celebrate you can give them examples picnic at the park, BBQ, pancakes in bed, everyone else cleans but mom, moms butler for the day, homemade photo shoot with kids and you(self timer),etc
Explain how you do it/did it for your mom and that it made you feel so happy to make the mothers in your life feel special and loved. It might feel weird but this is how they will learn and see that the day matters to you. Your oldest two will understand. Make some Mothers Day memories with your the babes who do value you and don’t include him. Don’t even let him know your plans. & yes it might be tough with all the littles(mom of 5 ages 1-8 so I get outings are tough) but you will be so happy you made a plan on Mother’s Day followed it through with or without his support. Whatever you do don’t stay home and be sad. Happy Mother’s Day, stay strong.
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My husband takes the kids and they pick out a card with maybe flowers or candy. Nothing big. I feel he should do a better job of showing respect for your roll to your children. If he would get a gift for his mom, he should at least give the kids the opportunity to get you something.
I have been with my man for over 18 years and he has only bought me a hand of things for Mother’s Day but he always expects me to get things for Father’s Day
I would take the kids and go do something you enjoy doing together on Mother’s Day. And don’t include your husband, since it’s your day and “you are not his mother”.
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Buy yourself a bunch of stuff and make a big deal of mothers day. Then completely ignore fathers day.If he mentions it, tell him he isn’t your father
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My dad used to say this to my mom. I hated it! My husband has asked every year what I want even when we were just dating. We in total have 6 kids, previous kids and ones together. If he ever even thought that I would be gone. He contributed to the reason I am a mom and step mom.
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Divorced, but always bought each other mother’s/fathers day gifts for each other “from the kids” it teaches them about giving and appreciating!!!
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I had 4 kids by my ex and those were his exact words too. That attitude is part of the reason he’s an ex…
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A man is supposed to teach his children how to treat a woman.
Your husband should take the children out to get you a gift!! The children are too young for income or a vehicle to do that themselves. He should be teaching the children how to treat people.
Just do the same for Father’s Day. He’ll get the message loud n clear.
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