I understand not wanting a gun in your house. Even though I grew up around guns and I’m proficient with shooting them, I’m still not comfortable with having one in the house. I really wish we had the money to get a biometric safe that only he could open. My depression/suicidal thoughts are bad here lately and I really feel like it’s taunting me.
So for those that are telling her to get over it or it’s his house too, sometimes it not just about not liking guns. It can also be about worry about the safety of yourself and others in the house.
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Guns are not bad when PROPERLY used and put away. Yes, he should discuss with you , but yes you’re overreacting. I carry one, my fiancé does not. But we live in a very high trafficking area and I’m often alone with our 2 year old. So it’s for my protection and to help me protect my son.
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Move out he’s better off with out you!
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Whats the real story? He doesnt listen, spends money when he shouldnt, your house versus our house…cant give advice without knowing more information. In the end its about communication, you BOTH should listen to each other. If you BOTH are not listening then there is the problem.
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Yes, he is a grown man, he works for his money, he can spend how he desires. Enjoy “your house” sounds like you’ll be single in “your” house if you keep trying to tell a grown man how to live his life and spend money he works for.
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Yes, BIG overreaction!
Do you ask him before you purchase everything?!!
A gun is for safety, sport, hunting, etc…
There’s strict rules and regulations in Canada and when not in use, need to be locked up!
FYI: guns aren’t bad… people are!!!
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Honestly, I feel like I need more information. Is it because he’s not hearing how you feel? You think it’s your house your rules instead of both of your house and both of your rules? Spending money you don’t have? Because guns aren’t bad. They need to be properly used and stored, but we have 7 kids and have guns. None of our kids have ever went for any of our guns, and even if they were to try they could not get to them. We have them locked up and safe. The only two that aren’t locked up are one of the paint ball guns and a BB gun, but our kids don’t touch those either unless they have permission. Our actual guns are the ones we keep locked up. If my husband bought a gun and didn’t tell me or ask my thoughts I would not be mad. Just like he wouldn’t be mad if I bought more guns. Honestly, I think it’s an over reaction just with the information given. Unless he’s spending bill money on a gun, he should be able to buy a gun.
We’re a gun family and I for one don’t think you’re overreacting… it’s a big purchase that comes with lots of responsibility that could have dire consequences if not taken seriously… that being said do I think you have the right to absolutely just veto the decision… no. But there should be negotiations that bring you some peace like lessons and a safe. Now if you still don’t trust your husband having one there’s probably deeper rooted problems that need addressing and therapy may be something to look into.
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I think you are overreacting. As long as the gun is being locked up and out of the reach of children I don’t understand the problem. We have guns and a nice gun safe.
why would you not want a gun for protection for your home, would not want to go to bed without one
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I would make him get a gun safe and keep it locked up. A relationship is about compromise.
I’m here in Australia and we have a very strict gun law, so not many people have guns in their homes for protection, but I would say let him have the gun it could mean the difference between life or death and protecting your family I understand you are uncomfortable with one in your house but as long as the safety is used and stored properlu
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Every story has 3 sides: his, hers, and the truth. This is only one side of the story. I still don’t see the problem, though. If you don’t like it, move out!
Seriously?? Youll be thinking different if someone breaks into your house to hurt you! Guns arent dangerous unless its in the hands of a bad person
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You both are individuals. Individuals who chose to come together in love. You are not a boss of him and he is not a boss of you, you are a team. And as a team, you guys are going to have differences that mesh, and respect is necessary. Hopefully, both sides show respect and compromise. You don’t believe in guns, but that does not mean that he has to rid himself of his beliefs in them. And vice versa. Ya’ll are not going to be exactly the same, that’s just how it is. You don’t change each other, you grow with each other. Love one another… and god bless.
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So many pro gun people who seem to miss the point of this. They had an agreement. They’re in a partnership, regardless of his wants it should be a mutual choice and if she doesn’t want one regardless of the reason then it shouldn’t happen. He just needs to respect that. She may respect he wants it but she’s not okay with it. Its not the same as buying clothes etc as so many of you try to say it is. Clothes shoes etc don’t get pissed off at you or cheat etc and then pull out the nearby weapon to kill you. They sure as hell dont need to be locked in a safe away from children. BIG BIG difference. Pro gun people and people with guns made your own choices and would not understand why this is more serious to someone who isn’t comfortable or not pro home guns.
From reading just what’s wrote, yes… absolute overreaction. Does he control what you buy? Are you willing to take a class to help you get over your fear?
Is it “your house” or do you both live there and pay the bills, work, etc. More information is needed.
The last time my husband bought a gun without my knowledge, it was actually more a barter, and I was mad at the guy who couldn’t afford to pay him, not him. But he’s a hunter, and gun safety is just part of life, including child rearing, for us.
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Nothing wrong with it. Good protection!
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Welllll that’s the cue for me to take my kids and move out if I were you
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Honestly…I grew up in WY. Now live in CO. I used to feel the same way until all the civil unrest and seeing the rioting and looting on the news this year. It really changed my view when protecting myself and my husband. We live in the country as well so there are some worries there for me. He definitely should talk to you more about this but try and see things from his perspective as well.
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I actually made the having a gun in the home issue a deal-breaker early on in our relationship. He still sneaks behind my back and pisses me off, but I’ve told him if I ever find a gun in our house, I will assume the kids can find it, too and I will dispose of it. And I won’t tell him I did it.
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Teach the kids safety even my 1 yo knows better than to touch my guns
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Will it be locked in a safe? Unloaded with bullets stored in another area? Will everyone in the house, including him, be taking gun safety courses? Those would be stipulations I would have. But it sounds like there are many other problems besides this
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In this crazy world, you might want to get a gun. I cant imagine not having one, now that I have one.
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You may not like them and don’t want them in your home but he does not need your consent or permission YOU’RE NOT MARRIED, and especially if he has his own house you have no say. Yes you’re in a relationship but not married and if you can’t comprise with him leaving it in his vehicle while visiting you, you both have a problem.
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By reading what you wrote and how how you worded it I’m going to say yes and tell you that you sound very controlling
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When you’re standing at the wrong side of that barrel let’s say god-forbid in a home invasion, you’ll be thankful your husband has that gun. Buy a safe and keep it secured might make you feel better but I’m telling you woman to woman you need that gun!
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Just tell him “if he wants a gun in the house it can go in a locked cabinet in your bedroom/ wardrobe”
Sounds like he’s been disrespectful for a while about a variety of topics, right? People very rarely change. If this is how he is and how he’s been, it’s 99.9% never going to change. As someone who’s done it, you will be infinitely happier alone than playing crabs in a bucket with someone who doesn’t respect you. Real love is rooted in respect
I don’t blame you! With all the gun crime and innocent lives caught in the crossfire I completely understand, but I’m English and very anti guns, they only people I believe should have them are the police
I totally understand. Of you feel that strongly then you need to go or make him leave. Communication is key. Sounds like he dont care about your feelings.
I don’t like guns either . But guns are a good idea to have now a days as long as they are kept in a safe and high up away from a child’s reach. This world is crazy and there can come a time you may need one and that’s the time your gng to wish he had got it. Always better to be safe then sorry. I never wanted one in the house either but to much is happening and more might happen next month. So we have a friend who makes guns and he’s making us ar-15 and some hand guns.
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Sounds like you’ve got more issues then a gun.
I see nothing wrong with a man wanting to protect his family.
Well… Im pro gun so… I can’t really help with this one.
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Sounds like u may have some control issues and he may have some communication issues.
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I believe in communication too and if you feel he doesn’t listen then get marriage counseling however, remember you both are equal partners your say so isn’t any more important than his and if he does want to own a gun… He should be able to. I hope you both get some counseling. If he doesn’t ever take your feelings into consideration then yes you have a problem but make sure to treat him as an Equal and an adult. Good luck
I dont believe that your issue is with him buying a gun without your consent. I think its him buying a gun after you’ve expressed that you are against it being in your home. Either way, as an adult he should be able to make purchases as he chooses within reason.
I would not want a guy that needed my consent to own a gun. Why not embrace it and have the whole family go to target practice lessons together. The only reason to be scared of a gun is not knowing how to use one properly. You can lock them up or store them up high at home.
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You don’t want to own a gun but he does. Yet women expect their men to protect them when danger comes. If you don’t trust him with a gun, then you shouldn’t trust his money, his house or his company.
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I hated guns as well until my hubby made me take a CPL class and now I love shooting. Try seeing things his way and learn about it.
Sounds like a control issue but this can save your life and others I have permit and when I travel to Florida or anywhere I take my gun
I am in a relationship of mutual respect, if my husband wanted to bring a gun into our home, the respectful thing to do would be to at least discuss it.
Well, the answer here is quite a bit more than just yes you are overreacting or no you are not. Sounds like you guys need more dialog.
You may not like guns. Does he share that same feeling? Ask him why he wants a firearm. Maybe he wants a new hobby, firearm ownership is a great one too. Maybe its for self defense. Maybe he doesn’t feel safe, and he is looking for new ways to protect his loved ones.
You need to talk to each other.
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You are overreacting.
Hes an adult, he shouldn’t need your consent to buy something with his own money.
He’s not you fricking kid that needs consent his right. Just like if he told you you can’t buy something you like but he don’t the shoe would be on the other foot now wouldn’t it
Aw… You think you own him… Would you be as upset if he didn’t want you to work or didn’t want you on bc? Funny how that works…
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I don’t think the issue is really about guns. It sounds to me he constantly disregards, dismisses and disrespects her in general.
Grow up honey. He doesn’t need your permission to purchase one.
One more post. The comment section is completely missing the point. They are focusing on the wife not liking guns as opposed to the husband’s unwillingness to comprise with his wife. He’s ignoring her and her wishes, its her home too. And he’s making her feel like an outsider.
Owning a gun is great. Is an awesome responsibility. But at the cost of your wife? The one who you promised to standby you? Idk.
In this day and age, let him buy the gun and ammo
You should buy a gun now while you still can.
He’s a grown ass man, Susan. But he doesn’t sound too smart being with you.
You may be heard but he disagrees. He is allowed his belief, too.
It’s simple… leave if your not comfortable…
I’m from Texas it’s always been a must have in our home. All my girls know the dangers of guns but also know how to shot them as well! It’s just me and my girls in our house hold so having them is a peace of mind.