Run as fast as you can … now.
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Omg you poor darlin, that’s terrible xx
He is controlling you with money. Leave!
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Get a job or develop some skills using YouTube tutorials (if you want to stay home to work), get your independence & take care of yourself. Anything for the home he can pay for out of his pay when he sees the need. Let him carry the mental burden for the home (grocery lists, utility bills, school fees, etc). Rest. If he wants to handicap you so that you can’t do anything then DON’T do anything & don’t stress. Put it all on him. When he is finally looking at bills past the due date, an empty fridge & shabby home then he might wake up & you can then have a conversation about marriage & teamwork. A man is supposed to leave his parents & cling to his wife. He’s clinging to the wrong woman post-marriage.
I don’t know why women put themselves in these situations seriously you have allowed him to have full control! My advice Go and get your own job during the hours he’s not at work, make your own money. Sooner or later he will know what it’s like to be stuck at home with the kids and no car!
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That is financial abuse and his mother is condoning it.
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Leave him. How did you even get yourself in the situation?
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The epitome of being controlled. Either demand change and a mutual respect for each other or leave. That’s toxic AF.
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I’ve shared it with others and I’ll share it again. If you give him the power to feed you, you give him the power to starve you. Get a job, buy a car, put it only in your name, insure it yourself, pay ONLY the daycare bill and your car/work costs since he seems to be happy with taking care of the current bills. If that upsets him, tell him to go to his mothers. Or better yet, just move out. Save that nest egg!
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- Get a part time job.
2nd tell mil she can watch the kids for a bit you have errands to run. - Tell hubby to grow some balls.
Me and my hubby both work full time jobs him 50 to 60 hours a week. Me I work 40 to 60.hours myself. Not easy but necessary. Thank God my mil tools good care of my son. Who is a hand full. Hubby and wifey need to work it out. Or tell him your out. Your not happy.
Get a job and get your own account and debit card that he does not control or have access to…get a joint account strictly for paying bills and household stuff…y’all both able to put in and allow him to pay the bill out of that
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I say get a job so you have your own money!!! But if he leaves yall without milk and necessities with his children in the home… maybe consider leaving!!!
You have not one but TWO people controlling you. Nope nope nope. This is 100% financial abuse
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how do u even think theres a solution to this that doesn’t involve u leaving for good?? if he agrees he shouldn’t trust u WTF are u there for???
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What’s the problem ?
Tell him that either you and him are a partnership or nothing. Get a job let his mommy watch the kids while you work and get your chicks in a row so you can leave him
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I don’t want to just repeat what others have been saying so far. But my advice would be for either you to 1). Go to counseling with your spouse. It would help with the issues of (sounds like resentment of his mom overstepping and him allowing it) and him controlling the finances. 2). Discuss (cash on hand) that is for you when you need to get stuff. Though, if you ask me something is fishy if you can’t see bank statements? I’d like demand to see those personally… being married makes you responsible for more than you realize. 3). If he is unwilling to do any of the previous steps, look into getting a job or ways to earn cash. Perhaps leaving is for the best. We don’t know your situation or him. If he’s dangerous please find help. 
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This is not your fault, but you must leave. Sever all contact. There are a few early harbingers of a man who is eventually going to kill you that can be seen before he lays a hand on you and this is one. If that alarms you, good, there are alarm bells here. Shield your kids and keep yourself safe by making a clean break. Insist on it even if he and those close to him are not happy about it. Let nothing deter you from keeping him out of your life.
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He needs to be reminded that marriage makes the two as now one. And that to marry, each of you is to leave your mother and father to cleave to one another. He is now married to you as his partner in life and should share his life as such. Mother needs to know her place as he is now a grown man and she has no longer the place to satisfy any of his needs. Has he put his mother on the banking Acct? If he were to die, would you have access? Who has he listed for secondary access? These things need to be discussed. People die everyday at every age. If he can’t come to grips with a new found maturity for married life, I will caution you about staying with him. If he does this now how else will he restrict you in life later? Seriously you must ask these questions. I’m not saying for him to ignore his mom but you are his family now and should always come first, even before your children! I hope anything I’ve said will be helpful.
100% financial abuse!
I wouldn’t put up with it!!
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You NEED a car incase there is an emergency with you or your child.
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This is considered Domestic Violence.
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Open your own account and quietly start putting money away for your escape.
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First off, why oh why will women put themselves in this situation? Honestly. Never depend financially on a man. Ever. It’s a huge no no because of these type of circumstances. You need to 1. Find yourself a job or a form of steady income. 2. Leave his ass. 3. Get child support. 4. Start building your independence and with it YOUR HAPPINESS. HAPPY MOM, HAPPY KID.
You say you have been together for 5 years? Was he and his mother like this before you got married? And first of all you married him not his momma! Tell him to get off the tit! Get out while you can! Don’t stay and let life pass you by!
Tell him to go stay with her … that’s just wrong after you guys been together that long
Run don’t walk!!! I have been where you are. It’s not gonna end well for you
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He’s controlling you. Getting your own job maybe solve your money issues, but if he is that controlling, he may try to control that too. Honestly, I’d just leave if an ultimatum doesn’t work.
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This is a form of abuse (control) and it will only get worse over time.
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Run…run! You need to get out of this as fast as you can. I guarantee it will never get better! Make a better life for you and your child! At least the court will make him pay child support.
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okay HUGE issue here.
Are you a wife or a slave…
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Why did you marry him? Lol
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Go get a job and leave the kid with his mom since she wants to be all up in your shit!! Problem solved.
Finances, religion, how to ran a household etc should be discussed prior to marriage.
Sit him down and explain that you won’t be able to help around the place any more because you need to find a job to buy yourself a car and have cash to buy groceries. Since he has the car he will have to be responsible for day care now. Picking up and dropping off. And helping around the house since you won’t be home much. If he isn’t willing to talk then. Then go enjoy some freedom and start a career so you can leave his ass.
Sounds like his mother’s voice is stronger than yours in YOUR marriage. Marriage counseling ASAP and boundaries. If he cant follow that though I’d be done. Also it sounds like none of this is new and you possibly ignored some serious red flags before this…
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Cut the cord already!
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Marriage is all about trust and you should be involved in all monetary decisions. Sharing in everything you do. Its like being a prisoner. Get yourself a job, be free. You are being controlled. Any time you have a Mamas boy its always bad for the wife.
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Oh F that! My husband gladly has me take care of all the bills and bank transactions! He doesn’t even know how to access our account! Lol. That shit would not be ok with me!!! Demand you have access to your bank accounts!
There is nothing else, I would leave as fast as u can, n never look background
Well for one get a job that way for 1. You have your own bank and nobody can tell you how to handle your $$$. 2. It’ll help you get away from the mother-in-law honestly what he does with his $$$ is his choice.
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its financial abuse and controlling. give an ultimatum or just leave. doesnt sound like hes worth trying with though.
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Sounds like his mom is hid wife and you’re just his side piece. I would get rid of him. Find a legal way to make your own money and put your money into your own Bank Account & don’t give him access to it.
you need to seriously think your priorities in life. stop being controlled and do something. leave … reach to friends your family…
Get a job and be independent? But also leave
Dont u get child tax in ur account u should have it transferred to ur account if not thats not fair though id leave him its should be both ur money
Open a debit card and have him quickpay you cash whenever you need it. Chase bank is the quickest
hand him the divorce papers thats what you can give him.
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I literally could’ve written this myself…
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If you don’t want to leave, go get a job and keep your money. I say run tho but that’s me who ran outta a horrible marriage and am so happy now
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I was in the same situation at one time. That’s controlling and it is like you’re in a relationship with him and his mom, that’s not a marriage.
Uhhhh. This isn’t right. I understand he works, but it’s BOTH yalls money. Mommy dearest would also be told to mind her own business. I would talk to him about this cause that’s just crazy and controlling. So you have wait till he can take you to the store and all that? Id lose my mind. I’m a SAHM right now too, but if it wasn’t for me no bills would get paid or grocery’s bought lol.
It never changes… Run…
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This is a huge red flag all around… controlling and manipulating. I’d leave.
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Hell to the no!!!
He is treating you like his kid.
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You need to leave he is not your dad or care giver he is suppose to be your partner! Stay with family get your ducks in row an leave him
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Oh hell no… thats a form of control… uf that’s what you want to deal with the rest of your life:woman_shrugging: or talk to him and he doesn’t take you and your feelings into consideration then id be gone 
This is so 1950s. Id suggest going to see a counsellor to start hun.
Honey, this isn’t a marriage, it’s a prison and he hired his mom as the warden. You can save yourself now and leave. It will never change, and you will never be happy.
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Get a job and make a life for yourself, I know from experience. Do not be dependent on anyone, make your own way.
You know my opinion is? You’re not going to like my opinion!!! Find you another man??? You should never have to beg your husband for money to go buy something or do something. Maybe you need to find a job and you need your own money. All I know is I have a daddy to this day I bet you anything if I called him right now and I needed that debit card I could get it and so could my mother and my mother has her own money. So you’re saying your mother-in-law says that your own husband should not trust you with the money that he makes to spend for your family I mean you’re crazy right you’re out of your mind right??? That is something I would not tolerate!!! My husband gives me money at any given time I need it and I know if I want a job I can go get one but I also know my husband makes the money and no matter what it’s me and my kid that gets that money he does not control that money he does not hide his money I can have his social security debit card and buy whatever I want whenever I want pay the bills however I want and you’re sitting here on Facebook going day to other people that your husband does not let you have access to the money that’s made for your family and you guys have said wedding vows to each other and said I do and that in sickness and for richer or poorer in health till death do you part.I do not like no controlling man I’m sorry you do not control your woman you do not tell her she cannot have friends she can’t talk to people on the phone on her Facebook that she can’t go out and do things because I’m sorry I had a mother that spent money on me and we went and done mother daughter things I had girlfriends that went with my mom and I to shipwreck island and everything there is no way my mother would have ever let my father controlled her or the money like that in their marriage. And that’s the way I am with my husband know and my husband would never be that way to me anyways sorry not sorry it’s time to find you somebody knew if it’s going to be like that
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I was with a mamas boy, we weren’t even married and he let me use his card for whatever we needed no matter what, anything from milk to $350 worth of groceries, even after we split he let me use his card for a couple things our son and I needed
That’s not a marriage, that’s a hostage situation. I feel suffocated thinking about it.
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Divorce him for being a mama’s boy and get joint custody. Get your own job and live free from his loyalty to his mother rather than you.
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Financial abuse is still abuse.
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If my husband said he didn’t trust me he wouldn’t be my husband. Your choices are throw the whole man away and move on or get a job and make your own money. I e been with my husband for 15 years and we have always shared an account. We both work but there have been times only one of has worked and we still share 50/50. We do t have to ask permission to buy anything unless it’s a large amount we discuss it. Marriage should be a team not him and his mom vs you.
Wow! Yeah you should leave for sure!!! I have been with my fiance for 10 years i am also a sahm… We have had a joint account since we moved in together. He was also a mommas boy and she used to be all up in our business. I told them both about themselves and it stopped. Put your foot down and it will change or you definitely gotta get outa that situation.
Throw that husband away and get a new one 
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TOXIC… sounds like it’s time to go find a job
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Wait, why would his mother have any say over what you and your husband does. That is crazy. You need to tell him either he treats you like a wife or you are leaving. You can’t live like that! When I first got married I also didn’t work but my husband would hand his entire check over to me and have me pay the bills and get groceries and he would take a small allowance for lunch for work. There’s no way you can function as a wife without access to funds. I couldn’t live like that. NO way.
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Are you even aware if how controlling her mother is before you married him? I guess he did not marry you for love. That’s not love that you’re getting from him.
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Sounds like he should of married his mother.
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There are huge red flags here! He’s controlling you by not making sure tou have a vehicle and funds. What if something happened and you can’t leave for whatever reason? I think you know the answer to this question.
Do that. Leave. Take the kid and go.
Look I have an ex and if I need help or need anything he still will help me out with money or whatever for my kids and anything over and above what he pays in child support so real men don’t treat you like that they just don’t you need to get a job and get out and doing your own thing or you need to leave and find a man that respects and cares about you because this one does not
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U not working a d y not having money or your bank account and him doing it he is doing this so he can control you cause for one u have no car to go anywhere u have no money to even buy anything huge redflag if this isn’t fixed quick then u need to move on cause I would never let someone control me I think it sounds like he likes it the way it is he can keep tabs on you this way
What I’d do is go get a job and stop doing all the house stuff. Tell him since you dont’ have access to money and have to beg for it, you have needs and you have to get a job to supply those needs so from now on he has to do half the house work. Fair is fair. I’d do that or leave.
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leave, his just using money to control you. if he loved you he wouldn’t let you go without.
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Dunno why you’d marry someone like that to begin with but you pretty much answered your own question
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Get a work from home job and put ya money up or fight his mama either choice
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This is total financial abuse. Your husband is a controlling asshat
And his momma would hit the door. I would have put a stop to that on day one! She wouldn’t be butting in on my personal business like that. That is madness.
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Stop doing for him tell his mama to come do it since she’s so willing to give him some advice being at home as hard work
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Bake the mama some exlax brownies and when she sick whisper next time I Burry you and I shore have the legal right over your son to burry him !
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He sounds like he is controlling your life. Either that or he is buying things he shouldn’t. I’d leave x
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I’d get a job, get your own money. Maybe MIL will babysit or get a babysitter and make him pay for it.
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Financial abuse is real.
Get a job, get your own bank account and debit. Start saving, he shouldn’t have any access whatsoever to that money. Keep it to yourself. Once your able to leave, do so. This is hella abusive and you deserve more from life then to be tied down and treated like nothing. Make some friends also. You can and should have a wonderful life!
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Leave!! Nothing worse than a mamas boy when the mom is toxic.
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That’s something that should have been dealt with before y’all got married!
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Wtf would you marry him???! You thought you’d have a fantastic life no job no money? Milking off your husband come on??? Honestly this is the 1920s they don’t make men the way they used to and his still listens to his mum? This is just all kinds of wrong
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My mom went through this and it’s a form of abuse because he is controlling you financially. Go get a job and tell him he’s gotta pay for daycare
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Ya thats weird and sketchy to me me and my fiance have a joint account and have our own accounts we pay bills together my fiance is always taking my card and I have his card and credit cards in my wallet yoir man sounds very controlling and I would run now if I were you
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Get a job. Even a small job. Keep the money and buy your own car. 50 years ago we, yes we, did not have the rights we have today. What happens if something happens to him? How are you going to take care of things? Granted if you have or have had a problem handling money, then a careful budget needs to be followed. Sit down to talk to your husband and figure it out.
Girl leave. Fuck this whole situation.
Get your own part time job, find a sitter, get your own car, and open your own bank account and don’t let him and his momma run shit! That’s controlling and low as hell. And his momma should stay out of yalls life. I’d make sure to flip them both the finger when you leave!
Financial abuse! It either changes, you get out, or you decide this is the life you want for your self and emulate to your children.
Tell him he needs to decide who he is married to you or his mother because you are thinking of leaving him and getting a job.
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Omg! I’ve been thru this! Get out!
That’s abuse. Get a job, leave.
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Bye bye husband get yourself a job or 2 n find yourself someone you love n loves u not mama! There r men out there close to their moms but not after marriage
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