Cut him off. Write off his debt and make it clear that there won’t be anymore handouts. His phone bill isn’t your responsibility.
First of all you should have never let this happen(9,000). Secondly report those phones and lost/stolen no money no phone period! I do this with my son when he is acting up.
Secondly, your money is gone you will never get it back. Now you just need to decide if it something to cut them out of your life for or let bygones be bygones and NEVER let them borrow money again. My motto is don’t loan money you can’t afford to lose.
I had to cut my own brother off after his bill got up to 800 , sorry bout his bad luck with using me too much!
Small claims court!!!
Cut him off financially. Just say no from now on. You thought you’ve been helping him, when in fact you’ve been enabling him. It’s the same principle as a drug addict. No more!
My grandfather always taught me, don’t loan money you expect to get back.
Kick him off the plan and unfortunately probably just forget about the money he owes you.
Never lend money you can’t afford to lose.
Cancel his part if the phone
Unless he has been sick or disabled for a year, My question is ?
What kind of MAN is jobless for a year ?
Stop enabling them!!! Its only going to continue
Wo w! A lot of money. He may not be able to pay back yet. New job, new baby. What does your husband say?
? why is the family on your phone plan?
You’re setting yourself up for being used and evidence shows that you are being taken for a ride!!
Cut them all off, it’s not your job in life to look after your partners extended family.
Either put up with it or put a stop to it all now.
Kick them off the phone plan and stop giving them your hard earned money. I don’t say loan, because loans get paid back. Hopefully they don’t also live with you. They sound like they’re really taking advantage of you and I’ve been there, and it SUCKS.
Breaks his knees.
Don’t play about money, especially if you have kids to take care of.
And any of you who say “let it go in 2020!!!” Are privileged assholes.
Cut them both from the plan until theure paid up!
New year new rules:
Set up payment plan with brother, miss a payment-no cell, no second chance. You have a baby on the way so no deadbeats you can’t afford it.
Just disconnect him or them trust is everything. They or he broke it .new year new start
Ain’t gonna get it back…
Dont loan to relatives…
Dont give anymore
Does his wife work? How have they been living for a year with his having no job? I’m sure they have many accumulated debts to pay off. Invite them over to discuss their finances & ask how soon they can start making monthly payments of $X.
If you lend $ be prepared to lose it. If they can’t pay their phone bill, how on earth can they afford a child? Ask if his wife will get on reliable birth control until their financial situation stabilizes and improves.
Get a new phone plan, or at least tell them that you have and take them off.
Let your husband handle his family,talk to your husband, they may have a history of this kind of thing .you getting in it is not good ,let it go
Here is the thing. 1. No one should ever loan money that they can not walk away from. Meaning, if you don’t get it back you have to be ok with that. If you’re not ok loaning money you won’t get back then it shouldn’t be loaned out. Remember, you cannot control others. You can only control what you can control. You’re not responsible for repaying yourself so you can’t go off of your expectations that you’ll be paid off because you may not. 2. Is this person making payments? $9,000 is a hefty loan to pay back in a few months for someone that was needed to borrow money. What’s most important here isn’t what is owed but if an effort is being made. 3. Don’t mix business with pleasure. Get them off of your plan.
Take him and gf off your phone plan and ask him to start giving u x amount a week bk
I would tell him he needs to pay his part (and hers) of the phone bill by the next date the bill is due or you’re gonna cut their phones off and cut them off if he doesn’t. U also would tell him he needs to start paying what he owes and give him an amount due each month
If I were you I’d mention it to him and if things get hostile then let it all go. Call it a favor because last thing you want to do it cause a fight over something replaceable. Also don’t give him any more money and take them off of the phone plan. He’s got a job now he can get his own.
Never loan money you can’t afford to lose. When we loan $ we dont expect to get it back, if we do it’s a bonus.
You probably won’t get it all back any time soon, because $9000 takes a long time to make from most jobs. But you can let him know that you will be removing him from the phone plan and that you won’t be loaning him money anymore. My philosophy is that you shouldn’t loan money to family or friends anyway, because it strains the relationship. You can gift it to them, but never loan and expect it back. Also talk to your husband to make sure he’s not telling his brother “don’t worry about the money,” and “take all the time you need,” behind your back.
Cut them off.no more phone and loans. Until payed up
You expected him to pay 9k back in 4 mos? Let’s be realistic here most people barely make it on min wage let alone be able to pay 9k in 4mos
Take them off the phone plan first of all because if he hasn’t started paying yet he has no plans to. Then set up payment arrangements for the money he owes and if he doesn’t stick to the payment arrangements after a couple of weeks then sue him. I know it sounds cruel, but if you don’t do it now he is forever going to feel like he can just borrow money and not pay it back.
Take them off the plan!
And honestly I wouldn’t push the money part. If your financially stable then let them pay as they can. But take them off of you phone plan. They can get pay as you go phones like straight talk.
What??? How do you let someone owe you 9k? Cut him off he’s a grown ass man.
Take both OFF phone plan since he is working now. He can get a phone and buy minutes for it . I do. About $100 for 6 - 8 months. Then no monthly payment for him as it would be prepaid. I have a landline but cell is with me all the time (disabled). Write the debt off, claim on your taxes (deduction). Can’t remember what they call ‘debt cancellation’ I think. Phone records and whatever you have in addition as backup for your taxes. IRS form will need name and address. Start clean in 2020. He won’t pay you back. He is probably behind in everything don’t know how he made it a year without working unless unemployment maybe. Husband can buy the phone and like 90 minutes if he chooses. I use a TracFone and buy through Amazon or stores sell them too. Just cards with a 15 digit number to input in the phone. Run the idea by your husband . No arguments, just that you have to scale back, brother should understand that.
Cut his phones off, girlfriend included. No more carrying his family on Your bill. They can get a prepaid phone just about anywhere.
Honest to God if it was me I’d just be glad I was able to help. We don’t know what kind of situation we’re going to be faced with and life can change or be gone too soon. Stop keeping a running tab on him. Just my opinion.
Don’t let people borrow money expecting to get it back! First of all 4 months is not long enough for someone to get back up on their feet after not having a job! You do it to help people out not hold it over their head. And unless your the one working and loaning him the money it’s not your concern when he pays it back its your husbands. Be an adult and talk instead of coming to Facebook like a child for answers about YOUR problems.
He’s a damn lie, you’ll never get it back Take it from someone who knows.
I think the expectations that he will pay you are not reasonable. That’s not to say your unreasonable, but is it reasonable to expect he can pay it back?
You might need to wipe the slate clean & fogive.
Neve let him go on any phone plan with you & don’t ever let him borrow $$ from.you.
Why did you let the debt get that high
Dont loan out money expecting it back. If you cant afford to loan it out without getting it back, you cant afford to loan it out.
Cut him off from phone
Your asking a question when you know the answer but it takes guts to do it and no one can give you guts it comes from you making that happen ! So demand the money he owes if not half and cut him off the damn phone!
Time to cut the cord. Why cant his grown self have his own phone plan??? That’s weird to me.
Also…do NOT give any more money to him, he has already shown you he doesnt care and wont pay u back. Time to get selfish and think of yourself and your family.
Take him off your phone plan now…the end.
This man is getting away with taking advantage of you. Why do you allow it?
Cancel the phone first then try snd sort a payment plan out
Tell the brother he needs to get his own phone plan and he has a month to get that sorted and then his and his girlfriend’s phones are going to be cut off the plan as you don’t have the money to help them keep their phones going with how much is going on and how much they owe you as is.
You should be careful and not lend money anymore
Your husband needs to be the one to talk to his brother, and tell him he has 30 days to find a new carrier for him and his gf. If not, your BIL might see it as just you. I’d even forgive some or all,the debt, and say Good Riddance with that entanglement.
Take them off the phone plan, for one. Kiss the rest goodbye and learn from this! Move on!
He isn’t going to pay you, if he hasn’t tried already to at least pay his current monthly phone bill. Here’s a helpful tip: If you can’t GIVE it away, don’t loan it. I’ve learned from personal experience. If you loan something (anything), you have to say goodbye to it. If you can’t do that, then don’t loan it. I say give him a month’s notice that since your own family is growing, you have to tighten your budget and have decided they need to get on their own phone plan. Also, tell him (you and your man together) that you can’t afford to loan anymore money at all. Period. I would let the money he currently owes go. Just let it go. He isn’t going to pay it and you have to work on not holding it against him. Let it be a lesson learned on your part. I wouldn’t take any legal action against him; that will only create more hard feelings all the way around. Family is more important than money. I know he owes it & anyone else would hold him to it, but you have the opportunity to show him some grace. BUT, Stop letting him take advantage. You and your husband have become enablers. Stop now.
If they get upset and tells you they are not going to pay it back give them a “gift certificate” for the amount owed and turn their phones off! Cut your losses begore they grow even another month!
Once you are behind on your bills - it can take months to get caught up and ahead enough to pay loans - patience , but I agree to not lend anymore $:pray:
It’s a new year. Take them off your phone plan. He’s working now. STOP loaning them money. Helping out in emergencies is one thing but you are not their BANK. You have your own family to look out for. They will be just fine it will make him grow up. Close the bank book for good an cut phones off
Stop giving him money for one. Quit paying his phone bill and then give him time to get on his feet. He may owe you a lot of money but his household responsibilities will have to be taken care of before he ever thinks about paying you back.
My brother in law still owes us money. His kids flooded my basement, broke my vacuum, and destroyed two of my bathrooms. Has yet to pay us a dime. I’m sorry you are going through the same thing
It is up to your husband. You really will probably never see the debt paid back. Cut your losses and do insist on not lending anymore.
Good luck. I have a sister who owes me over $2000 for rent and bills. Lies telling everyone she paid me when she didn’t. Then I have a brother who owes 85 for gas and remaining rent. Needless to say I dont have anything to do with either.
Just say no next time they want to borrow. Just tell them you can’t until he’s pays the old debt. That’s it. Be firm.
Get husband to write a letter of demand and send it certified mail. You will get a response, if not, drop him from the phone plan. Small Claims court has a $6,000 max. Calif has $10,000.
Deadline on the phone. You gotta cut it off somewhere.
Never ever get into money deals with family. You either give them the money or don’t…loans don 't get paid back and causes bad feelings. Just my opinion…
Don’t loan money to family. If they need money and you want to gift it to them, that’s fine - but you certainly are under no obligation to do this either. Accept that you aren’t getting the money back, let it be water under the bridge if you can, and going forward, just tell him you can’t take care of your family and his. Tell him the phone plan is too expensive to keep him on and since you can’t be confident that he’ll pay his share, he’s got to come off. If he protests, tell him you understand a phone is a safety thing and a business thing and there are plenty of basic phones with basic pre pay plans that he should be able to swing. If he promises that he can pay his portion of the big plan smart phone bill, simply tell him how glad you are that he can afford to, and if that’s the case he should have no problem getting his own plan set up. It doesn’t have to be a fight - you just have to prepare yourself to kindly, but firmly, shut down his excuses.
Have your husband speak to his brother and maybe you should let his significant other aware of the situation.
Of all else fails turn the phones off and take him to court. Been there
No brainer. Seriously you have to ask. Cut his phone off your plan for starters. If you can’t figure the rest out I feel for ya.
You be surprised at how hard people will try to do for them selves when they dnt have the option to spong off of others. Tell him the expenses are getting to much for y’all to keep forking out money. Give him a dead line date on when your going to cut his and her phones off and stick to it! As far as the money he owes you! You may as well let that go and just let it be a gift, but however do not loan them any more money! Time to close that gate!
Turn them phones OFF! Make him sign a payment plans and if he doesn’t pay - Take him to court!!
Cut off his phone until he starts paying his share. I’m all for helping someone out but at this point it sounds like he’s taking major advantage and know y’all won’t do anything about it. Yes they might have a baby on the way but so do you PLUS you have 3 other children. You have to do what’s best for your immediate family in your home and shelling out money for their phones and not making them pay for it isn’t doing that. You might have to get tough for it to get better. Best wishes and good luck!
Just write that money off. I promise you, if you say one thing about that money, you’ll be the bad guy. Write it off./and do it. Write her off and hold your head high!
It will never stop until you stop enabling him, I gave been there with my daughter and her man I work 55 hours a week and I am done finding them, I have to get out of debt and we are not young me 60 hubby 70 who will help us when we need money not those that borrow. I’m done for my health and well being.
I would take a breath and calm down. While it sucks it’s highly possible it’s going to take him awhile to get back on his feet.
Tell hubby we need to stop cut the cord we have a family to.worry about .
You have your hubby talk with his brother. Time for them to get their own phone plan and start a payment plan on what is owed.
For that amount you can take them to court. Family or not. You are all grown and he is more than capable of paying you back. Even if you have to work out a payment plan. “Baby on the way” so? They should have thought about that beforehand. Next thing you know you will be pumping out money for their diapers too.
How about take others off your phone plan so they can get their own plan and pay their own bill so if they dont pay the phone company that their issue not yours. I have a brother but I have no reason to be on his phone plan I’m an adult with a family of my own we pay our own bills!
Depending on the phone plan you can make them responsible and just transfer the lines to them taken them off the plan. If they refuse suspend them until they pay.
I have 7 lines I know
I would say it’s time for them to get their own phone plan. You may never get the $9,000 but at least you won’t incur more charges for them
Turn the phone’s off,and tell him you need him to set up a payment plan
Talk to your husband first see what he thinks and and if he is okay with that let him do it as much as you hate to leave the dirty work to your husband its literally less stress on you right now.
Your first mistake was loaning him $9,000 in the first place. It’s not your responsibility to support him just because he doesn’t have a job.
Talk to the husband and talk with them give them 2 options start paying or cut their phones
Well take them off your phone plan, make them do their own and and loan no more money at all. If owes that much and not even trying to pay any back, he isn’t going to.
First rule of life NEVER LONE MONEY TO FAMILY…You will never get it back…
Pray about it first and then talk to your hubby and y’all do what is best for your own little family!
Shut the phone off and don’t give them anymore money.
Kick them both off your plan. You have your own family to worry about you can’t be taking care of his too
Tell him you cant afford it anymore so you have to drop the plan
Take him and his gf off the phone plan cut the money he owes and walk away and never look back. If you allow him to keep coming around he’s going to keep wanting money from y’all and not paying it back.
Shut off his portion of the phone, let him pay his own. Talk to you husband to speak to his brother about a payment plan to repay you. DO NOT lend him any more money. I let my best friend borrow $1000 4 years ago and I keep asking her about repayment and keep getting excuses. Good luck
Don’t loan money to family.
Get up frontm separate the bill. Make them responsible. Tell her. Make it clear not your barrel of monkeys not your responsibility.
He can pay you back. But I wouldn’t depend on that but cut it off. Before it gets worse
Cancel the phone tell him u guys have to cut down on costs. The past I would chalk up as a gift and move on. Never loan money it will destroy relationships… give it with no expectations of being paid back or don’t give it at all!!
Keep the phone for the husband on so he can get a job, cut the girlfriends phone off, cut off any more cash , USA is at 4% unemployment
It’s almost impossible to be unemployed in the USA at the moment.
If you are at an advantage it’s important you help where you can, but supporting a cripple is unhealthy. Also how dare they have children when they are already a burden to their family and society
Selfish people will continue to be selfish and take until those around them love them enough to push them to help themselves
God bless
I was raised if your gonna loan money out when asked. Dont expect it back and dont let it be money that takes food, shelter, heat away from your family.
I think it’s pretty simple, cut their phones off.
He wont pay kick his ass. Damage something valuable of his. There’s always a way to get your money back. Think outside of the box
Well since he started a new job, it can take some time to get adjusted with the new income coming in. Have you thought of sitting down and discussing a payment plan? Write out a contract with him. Let him know that you are removing him and his lady from the cell bill. Hope it works out
Gurrrll. Two word Metro PCS. There is no one on this planet who is taking money from son much less my family! At what point is it enough?? #CutThemOff
Just explain to them that you can no longer afford to support them and you and make a payment plan to recoup your money. Hopefully you will get it back, but at least don’t lose anymore
First off, you need to have a conversation with your husband about it because you’re going to cause a rift in your marriage by approaching your brother in law. Maybe your husband and his brother are conversing without your knowledge.
Take them both off your phone plan immediately! If they question you just tell them the truth. That as they already owe you $9,000, you are sure they don’t want to accrue any more debt. I would leave it there. I have a feeling you might get some of his debt back - hope so. If not, then at least he won’t be able to continue taking advantage of you.
Simple. No drama.
Arrange a payment plan. Use PayPal or Venmo to keep track. Send request or invoice via above payment options.
Eliminate anyone not paying on phone bill.