So many red flags are popping up. He’s definitely cheating!
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All those flags…trust your gut. He’s cheating
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If he didn’t cheat , he considered it. Regardless seems like he didn’t respect you by considering your feelings. .
It would be game over
He disrespect you he has feelings for her if you can’t trust him leave
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Nah that was all planned an I’m sure that was not the only time things like that happen.
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If he’s not cheating, he’s wishing he was. These red flags might as well be flashing neon signs at this point…
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Cheater cheater pumpkin eater these all seem like major red flags I’d seriously talk to this women and him and get to the bottom of things. Refuse to accept being treated like this if he can’t change then leave his sorry ass
It’s sad to see so many women telling her to throw in the towel. So sad that this generation has the “throw it away” mentality.
Talk to him. Tell him your concerns. He may have just been naive or ignorant. The woman’s actions are suspicious. He did do right when you told him no. That’s something.
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That’s a big hell no for me.
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Is this potentially a mid life crisis? Someone has shown an interest in him and he likes that attention alot so will do things just to be recognised. Maybe no ill intentions at all - who really knows. Maybe she notices him in a way that fills his bucket and in order for him to feel good which you as his partner are not fulfilling anymore. His love language my have shifted. You really need to communicate.
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My opinion he is attracted to her he’s changing his habits to please her, yeah after u complained he told her no but it shouldn’t of happen period!
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Eating salad but drinking? Ehhh.
A mans brain falls from one head to the other head🤨
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Was his name Sean? Cause that’s totally the same road map I went down for years with my Ex 
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I would say he is cheating. All those things are crossing the line! Maybe he is having a midlife crises? What would he do if the table was turned?
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Talk this out. Sounds like midlife crisis time and he won’t admit to it either always, they don’t want to accept it. This isn’t cool what he did and the audacity of her. Wow.
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That’s Definitely disrespectful. Big nope!! And red flags
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Red flag 
Watch Frazier season 2 episode 21 explains it perfect
Your man is interested in this other woman. Yes you were very disrespected. And he had no right or reason to chat her up about your marital problems. Unless he is either a lot closer to her than you think or he wants to be. Sounds like she does too. He drinking now? Yup to " impress" his new girlfriend. He KNEW you wouldn’t like what was being set up so kust didnt tell you, making HER more important than you, in everyone’s eyes. Get marriage counseling and make sure the two of them each go their own way. Surprise him at lunch times. You can grab him and go get lunch, thereby assuring yourself he isnt spending the hour with her and to show her and others you wont be giving up your hubby. He has shown her so much consideration it’s about time he showed YOU that
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Nope…if he’s going all out for this “coworker” he wants to be more or already is more than just “coworkers”… there’s no way I’d try to win him back so to speak…let that loser go!
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Ahhhh…no. I’m sorry, but it sounds like something is missing between you two and he’s found it elsewhere. For some, it can be another person, for others it can be realizing some things and knowing something is no longer healthy or working. The fact he was gaslighting you and you even worded it that you caved, tells me there is something wrong there for the both of you. There should be no gaslighting and caving. If there is an understanding between you two where he obviously should know this would be a problem and he went against that, then he was disrespectful as well. You’re still not seeing the bigger picture.
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I think yall better leave this place, cause I’m about to catch a case… Ron Isley, sing for this baby…
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You mean they went away together:face_with_hand_over_mouth:
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Girl… I’m sorry bt he fucked up, for sure disrespecting u, o hell no
He’s trying to impress her by liking the same SHIT. DON’T BE A FOOL AND STAY AT HOME ALL SAD ABOUT HIM. PLAY HIS GAME BETTER. 
. IF NOT LEAVE. VERY SNEAKY IF IT WAS INNOCENT. HE WOULDNT BE LYING AND CHAGING
Makayla Kirby sheeeeeeew weeee
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That is totally unacceptable! How would he feel if you stayed at your out of town house with a male coworker for 2 weeks? Plus he tried to hide it so looks like he is probably having an affair.
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This would be Me walking tf out of the marriage. No ma’am
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I’m pissed for you… I couldnt
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Midlife crisis… just wait for it. Men have a way of doing this crap.
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How did she go from not minding to stay in a hotel in case it was uncomfortable for her to be there being that he’s married to her begging him to go places with her? I don’t believe that. I believe he told you that bc he thought it would justify them going to places together. I say find a new husband 
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Yes totally disrespectful. He could have handled that in such a better way starting with letting you know. The sneaking around is what I don’t like.
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Don’t stay with this cheater! Pack his sh!t
Honey, it’s not just a coworker in my opinion…
My ex did the same thing and I told him, his job out of town or his wife and kid, he chose us for about 6 months than left again supposedly for work out of town, same boss and same rental house he had with a bachelor guy who was an alcoholic and partied all the time then rented the other rooms out in the home, one was to a female…. to make a long story short, he came down on one of the weekends to spend time with our daughter and me, his wife so while he went to the restroom, I was making dinner and his blackberry on the kitchen counter at the time was buzzing off the hook and I glanced at it to see what was the emergency of it going off like crazy, only to discover that the male roommate was asking him if he & the woman who was a coworker & tenant had slept with him (my husband) cuz apparently she was crying and he seen my husband come out of her room as he was “talking to her to comfort her”, that’s what my husband said, I wasn’t having it so that was the ultimatum I gave him, that job or his family as he could have found work in our city. It only lasted about 6 months when he went back so now 15 years later, I’m happily divorced from that cheater, he’s on his 3rd wife now, 5-7 girlfriends & 2 kids later lol 
plus he just moved back to his home state, thinking he’s new Gf won’t find out his past of what kind of character he is, you reap what you sow in life!
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Trust your gut feeling.
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You mean you EX HUSBAND?
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I’d walk away from the wife if I was that man. Immediately it seems like you’ve scared him into being able to talk to you, as you seem to have no trust for him. You seem ridiculously insecure and jealous. I hope the man moves on and finds someone that loves and respect him and treats him like a trusted loved one, and God forbid maybe even an equal. Toxic woman.
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Whewww ! Disrespectful is an understatement, I would be livid about the living situation but telling / talking to another woman about our problems …. I would just have to kill him to put him out of his misery cause I would torture him the rest of his life ……
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Your husband had a woman staying ALONE with him in that home and you’re worried about sightseeing?
Sweetheart you have bigger fish to fry then worrying about sightseeing. What your husband did was disrespectful as hell. If this woman had the option to stay at a hotel, she should’ve took her a** there. No man is his right mind should think this is acceptable. If he wasn’t trying to hide it, he would’ve cleared it with you first.
Next you got upset with him because he told her you were upset, well weren’t you? I would’ve told her that my damn self. 
Ooooh, and you are upset that he already went site seeing without you??? Im very sure he SAW AND VISITED SOME NEW SITES. PLUS, coworker babe is now his new texting buddy
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I have known men at work who told women “my wife would kill me” why cant they just tell the hoe no thanks! Why blame it on the wife?
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You feel disrespected because you were / are . This is simply wrong in every way . I would be having a watchful eye and would make surprise visits as needed . I don’t think I’d be trusting him right about now
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Trust ur Gut feeling…Something is going on between ur husband an his Co worker
She is crawling her way closer to ur husband an he is allowing it cause if he had Respect for his Marriage with u he would have tell her i am a Married man that be cannot he with her…
But he likes being with her an he has No Rights complaining to her about u an him are having problems because she is staying with him at his next house he is Living a double life…
Talk to him about it see how it goes from there or seek counselling an if No changes then walk away from him
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I hate to tell you this but that sounds like hes cheating and the fact that he thinks it’s not a problem to have a female stay at a house alone with him And not inform you of this is so unbelievably disrespectful. if I was you I would’ve flown down there And kicked her out myself then I would fly home and I would throw all his shit on the front lawn And change the locks
He is acting suspicious.
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Eff that guy. Plain and simple, it’s one thing to be nice and offer a hand or place to a co-worker but to take her places that you (HIS WIFE) wanted to go to for his first time too? Something definitely is suspicious.
My husband would be living at that out of town house forever if he ever did all of that.
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Something is going on. Trust your gut
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Just curious… if he has a house where he works why don’t you move to be with him?
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Has he ever done anything before for you not to trust him.
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Now if he asked you first and you met her before she came. Would things be different
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Yeah I’d way uncomfortable with all of that. He disrespected you on so many levels.
Make him know what it feels like without you dont play the back n forth crap
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Seems like he’s been cheating for a while. And put you and the kids on his doormat to use as he wishes. I’d start making plans and getting your shit together for that divorce.
She would gain my leftovers. 
Now as far as sightseeing. No. That’s for family and friends
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Maybe your husband was just being a kind person. Hopefully
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Something isn’t right and I am not sure it can be fixed… when trust is broken … it usually cannot be repaired.
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She needs to be shoved back into, and kept in her lane.
He cheated. Leave because of you stay it will be a disaster. The Marriage will never be the same he will continue. I am living that now. Please head my warning and leave that man.
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You are not wrong. Very inappropriate for her to be staying in his house . The fact that he would allow this situation at all would be my high alert moment. Although some of your other comments seem like there is more before this. Something to ask yourself… if this was reversed how would it be and ask yourself… do you deserve to be treated this way? No, you do not!!! Sending good vibes for a resolution.
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Oh hell no! First of all she was offered free lodging by the company and should have taken it and respected that he’s married and it’s completely not appropriate! He should have out of respect said no to the whole idea in the first place without even having to ask you or anything. It’s completely about the principle and respect I wouldn’t ever do that to a spouse or SO it’s completely disrespectful! It’s bad enough they stayed at the same townhouse together but then topping it off by going out to dinner and sightseeing together that’s an even bigger slap in the face! Also in my experience when either a man or a woman starts changing there behavior or habits for someone there’s most definitely something going on or something is brewing. I’d be having a serious conversation with him about the situation and some counseling because you want to get ahead of this before it gets worse.
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Ask him how he would feel if it were reversed!?!
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Time to have a very frank conversation. Be open minded but be prepared. There are alot of red flags here.
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Thats the sneaky link… But with u knowing. No doubt about it.
Who was paying for the dinners, drinks and outings?
Seems like dates and not sightseeing.
This behavior speaks volumes of his commitment to your marriage and what kind of man he is.
The woman is a part of this mess as well. If she really does know anything about relationships, she knows, she was wrong for staying with a married man.
Should the marriage end? It depends on if this guy is dumb or a cheater. He could be a dumb cheater actually.
I get the feeling he is lying about how much the coworker knows.
Everything he has told his wife is an angle to distract her from the truth.
She may just have to throw out the whole husband and get a new one.
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It sounds like your husband has a lot of money if he’s got a home house and a work house which, coincidentally allows him to have a home wife and a work wife and nobody seems to be destitute in this story.
Divorce him because what you’re not saying he’s doing is exactly what he’s doing and he’s waving it in your face.
If it all works out, you’ll be the one with two houses
You can do better
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I would contact the woman and ask her if they had sex. I put money on they did. I would ask her how long it’s been going on and see what she says. Make it seem as if you all ready know.
Sounds like he wants to meet Jesus. Her too.
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Insecure as hell it’s a work thing. Chill
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Sounds like you need to do some investigating and get proof that he’s cheating so you can divorce his ass! Very suspicious and totally inappropriate of him! But definitely get proof because some men like to deny deny deny!
There’s nothing okay about this.
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The fact that he didn’t tell you one of the coworkers was a female means he knew you wouldn’t like it. That alone says enough to me. If he thought you wouldn’t like it, having her stay there anyway is disrespectful to you and i sure the hell wouldn’t put up with his bs if i were you
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They only lie when there’s something to hide. And once they lie, they don’t stop. He disrespected you and your relationship and it will never be able to be what it used to be. You’ll always be wondering and questioning if he’s being truthful. You can either choose counseling or just get a divorce attorney. Unless you can live with always questioning and wondering, I’d get out now. I’m sorry you’re going through this.
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Divorce no question about it 
bye
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Yea no thanks 
there’s something obviously going on .
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No way, the company offered to pay for a hotel then that’s where she should of slept !!
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Don’t Be That Girl Sis 
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Can you start breaking up these long posts so they arent just one big paragraph? It’s painful to read.
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Red flags are flying!!!
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Oh hellll no. Throw the whole husband away!
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Get rid of him and let him have his carefree life. You don’t deserve this kind of treatment. Move on…
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Why are people so silly ??
Run as fast as you can getout of there
Sounds like he may be cheating? 
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The woman staying was bad enough but then to read he’s trying to eat better (to look better) and drink (to maybe be involved) was too much… He didn’t tell you for a reason. I’d be done from the complete lack of respect tbh.
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Im angry with you. The fact that the company was paying meant they didnt have to stay at your house. Second of all if he was just being friendly he could have told u about it and also told the lady If the guy left she would have to as well. Don’t be quick to anger your husband might just be in work mode and doesn’t even see her as nothing else but a co worker. Just set boundaries about what you are not comfortable with.
Look I’ll be honest. I feel like women let men slide a bit more than a man would let his woman. Meaning…it’s engraved in many women’s brains that men need to be a certain way or do certain things so we begin questioning (as you just did) whether or not things like this are disrespectful. Let me put it this way…it’s undoubtedly, obviously, blatantly and horribly disrespectful. There’s no if or ands about it. If you have that relationship where nothing bothers you…good for you. But the second you say to your significant other that something bothers you and being that he’s known you for a long time he should just know this…is the second he should’ve been like okay let’s get you a hotel. No explanation no nothing. Just boundaries and platonic friendship. It’s totally doable and understandable. I’m sorry if he made you out to be the crazy one, but that’s what manipulative people do. Girl, you are NOT crazy. You’re human. And most definitely don’t need to be questioning things like this. It’s not in your agreement as a married couple to make each other feel unloved unwanted and uncomfortable, I presume. If he’s having a midlife crisis and wants to be admired by other women or given a certain type of attention, that is his problem. Either productive couples therapy, or slowly but surely walk away. Detach emotionally before his disrespect becomes a habit and the new foundation of your relationship.
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y’all like the word divorce and run on here when most of you are in abusive relationships or lonely. Couples fight. As long as there is no abuse this is something they can talk through. High chance he didn’t want to upset her because of the distance and that’s all that it is. Talk it over honey.
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Why would he even think this was appropriate? Why would she even think that was appropriate! Red flags all around
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If they didn’t hump, they probably were both down to. She shouldn’t have stayed, she shouldn’t have wanted to. The fact that she did want to is an issue, meaning she will fuck your man and never give you a second thought. Be on heightened awareness cuz if he wasn’t on board with fuckin her, he wouldn’t have been so quick to be the host for her stay.
Girl … red flagsssss
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Return The Energy! Men Dont See What They Did Wrong Until Its Done To Them
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They definitely hooked up
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Time to say goodbye 
he definitely cheated give him to her
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Is it a house-house or more like a dorm with common areas? Why was the company OK with ANY of the employees staying there? Sounds like a violation of company policy to have two different sex people staying in the same unit unless they can lock their bedroom doors at night (though the landlord would have keys). Especially as it’s problematic to be in close proximity of others during the pandemic.
I’d try to get hold of the woman and talk to her if you can be calm and open minded and not jump to conclusions or be accusatory. If you can’t, then don’t talk to her. Do you have a good relationship with any of his other co-workers? Can you ask about their perception of their relationship—all business and cordiality, close or distant friends or downright flirtatious? If they’re his friends as well as co-workers, they might not tell you, but maybe it’s worth a shot. Don’t be accusatory or act like you’ve already made up your mind or the co-worker will clam up.
I assume hubs has a house in that city because he does frequent business there? Or is it owned by the company? Is it your vacation home together? Are there typically several employees staying there on assignment or is it only this one time?
Maybe it’s all fairly innocent and they just hung out together out of boredom, and he changed his usual habits out of politeness to her.
Definitely discuss this further when you are exceptionally calm and can really listen without interruption. Ask him if the tables were turned how he’d feel. What would he think if you went camping with a bunch of friends but the last week it was only you and one male friend and you slept in the same tent with him, even if in different sleeping bags?
If needed, marriage counseling is almost always helpful.
Learn relaxation/meditation techniques so you can talk without getting really upset. It makes it easier to get to the truth and to the bottom of issues, and makes the other person more willing to share with you instead of of bracing for an interrogation. If talking to you has negative consequences the other person will most likely withhold info out of self preservation and pain avoidance.OTOH, if you remain measured and neutral-sounding/seeming (feel free to scream and carry on inside if you can hide it), you can approach even the most difficult topics and find solutions.
So. Hes cheating on you
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These red flags ain’t a carnival sis
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Seems to me like he wants a new life. So he’s not hiding much (as we know of) he’s told you about everything apart from maybe if they’ve done stuff. ( Probably won’t tell you) I’d cut ties with him now or have a conversation ask him if he’s happy with his lifestyle with you etc
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Something happened or he thought something is going to happen. So he is now bettering himself to meet her standards
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That has lies and deceptions written all over it
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Have you actually asked him if he slept with her ?
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