I am continually having arguments with my husband over this as it’s made me feel cheap and dirty. So, we asked a friend of my husbands to help us with a report we needed to put together for court; we offered to pay him for his time… he declined the money by saying (while the call was on Bluetooth speaker and my 5yr old in the car) “you don’t have to pay me, your wife can give me a blow job.” We were shocked by what was said, but my husband 6months on continues to talk to this guy. His friend is not married and continually says he wishes he was and with kids.
He is a man, that is their humor.
sounds like a joke. My husband had a co worker ask him if he could marry me
Well he’s not gonna have kids by getting blow jobs
Just let it go. I laughed when I read it. Sounds like a joke
That is disgusting and degrading. Your feelings are valid. Tell him “you are making me uncomfortable” whenever he makes remarks like that. Don’t just “let it go”.
I would have let him have it right then and there. “It” being an earfull. I would have went the fuck off.
That’s no friend.
How disgustingly disrespectful!
Some people just don’t have filters. Just let it go.
Your husband would/ should be the one to tell his friend that was out of line.
My husband would lose his mind
I would tell him yourself that you didn’t appreciate that at all and that your offended and he needs to never speak to you or about you like that again
What do you want to happen? Your husband no longer being friends with him? Sounds like a joke. Just let him know you dont like being joked around with like that. I would have made a smart comment back if it was me lol
Next time reply with “you wish” laugh it off, even take it as a compliment? , x
It’s rude but pretty damn funny too
Sounds like men talking. Pretty normal shit for me to hear. Doesn’t even bother me. If it makes you uncomfortable just say so. Definitely sounded like an joke though.
I know it was a stupid gross joke but that all it was. If he says something like that again tell him you’re not comfortable with him talking about you like that.
Sounds like 2 guys talking and joking tell both of them you don’t appreciate or approve that, and let it go
Just relax. Smoke a blunt and chill and let your husband have some damn fun .get off his and his friends back. Stop driving peaple away by your own insecurities. Lighten up
I laughed too. He’s a jackass but baby that was funny. Just never give him one
Inappropriate man joke. Your husband should have given him crap for it or this man makes these kinds of comments and your husband just shrugs them off and that’s how their friendship works? I’d let it go and unless he tries to make hits on you personally.
This is why men say this shit because everyone chalks it up to them being men and it’s a joke and it’s just how men are. Wrong! Tell your husband point blank it bothered you and that you won’t be disrespected. Your feelings are valid even if other women can write that stuff off as funny. Its not and we literally live in a rape culture where sexual harassment is considered funny or a joke. It’s neither. I’d personally make my hisband cut ties with him. You trump any of his friends especially the ones who disrespect you!!
I also agree, let it go. Was it the most appropriate thing to say when a child was listening. No, but most likely the child really didn’t think hear it. Now if this guy calls you personally & says something inappropriate, that would be a different story
Wowwwwww your husband probably speaks that way too honestly.
My husband wouldve fucked his shit up🤷♀️
I would have said…sure my husband can take care of that for ya
Just a man and his lack of filter 🤷 I wouldn’t worry about it.
I your husband won’t do anything about it give the blowjob, that’ll teach him to stick up for his woman
My husband would have beat his ass
I would of Said sure but will cost you $500 the guy was trying to tell a joke that went wrong
Gross. But I think that’s how men act around each other. He probably didn’t think you could hear him.
Get over it and lighten up its a joke im sure! Did he even know your child was listening really though? Ppl get so offended by everything now days…yes a inappropriate joke maybe but still🤣
He was probably just being dumb, maybe he didn’t know he was on speaker phone lol but it was just a joke. That’s how guys joke lol
Your husband is the problem!!! Because MY husband would have knocked his teeth out…
Honestly that’s how guys talk to eat other when is women ant around I grow up with nothing but boys and that’s just how they talk to each other ,
Tell him that made you feel uncomfortable and don’t speak to you like that
Sounds like a joke, yes you didnt like it and im sure he got an ear full about it but not really a “end the friendship” offence
Joke or not , that’s way to far. My husband would have beat his ass if a man said that to me or about me.
Did he know you were able to hear him?
Not that it’s an excuse but this is some guys humor. It really just sounds like a joke and he may not have known he was on speaker. BUT if you don’t like it and have talked to your husband about it then he should talk to the guy and he should apologize to you. Just curious why did it make you so mad?
Very troubling to see how most of the comments (FROM WOMEN) are so blasé about the fact that this is unacceptable behavior (in private or not) and disgusts me that these same women are raising boys of their own. Thus the cycle continues… gross
You don’t have much of a man
To let some one ask you something like that
The fact that any of you are saying “that’s just guys being guys” is disturbing. A MAN would not allow anyone to disrespect his wife like that. Period. You’re married to a misogynistic coward who either thinks that comment was ok and doesn’t respect women, OR is too much of a wuss to check his friend.
This is where you tell him sorry but your dicks to small to blow
And then forget about the whole thing because it was a joke.
Take it as a compliment lol
Just laugh at it
If dude said that to my woman. Or about my woman. I don’t care if it’s my dad, my best friend , the pope. I’m knocking his ass the f out
I no alot of men joke around like that playing I would just let it go unless he has tried something then I’d say something again
Your child doesn’t know what a blowjob is and if they do, shame on you. Your husband doesn’t need to stop being friends with this person and you shouldn’t still be arguing with your husband over something he didn’t do. He should have said something to him in that moment about not talking about you like that but that’s it.
My husband friend hit on me (behind his back) when he and I first started dating. I told him what happened and how it made me feel comfortable. My husband took care of it and now decades (and marriage/families) later and we’re all still great friends and the shit is water underneath the bridge.
While we may have boundaries, some people don’t or theirs are simply different from ours. I don’t see anything wrong with a person needing reminding of yours and your spouses boundaries.
Next time respond “this is why you’re not married and don’t have kids”
I disagree with a lot of these comments saying that’s just how guys talk. No absolutely not. First if my guy ever said that to his friend about his friends wife I’d kill him two if his friend ever said that to him about me he would kill him. This is not how MEN talk maybe how boys or dudes talk but not MEN who respect their wife’s/GF
And I am very close with my Significant others guy friends and we all joke around but never would any of them say anything remotely close to this.
Lighten up and let it go.
Christ alive I feel for your husband:joy:. A man made a jokey comment and you feel cheap and dirty and 6 months on still bring it up whatever you do don’t go to a bar with men:joy:
Your husband ain’t shit!!!
Take it as a compliment sucks you kid was in the car
Guys talk this way. It’s natural 4 them. Not saying u shouldn’t b offended but u shouldn’t take it so personally.
I cannot believe the comments I’m seeing. No, it is not normal to sexually harass your friend’s wife. That is not normal guy behavior, and guys who behave like that are not normal, they are scumbags. For Christ’s sake why would anyone want to believe you have to be a scumbag to be a normal guy? You cannot tell your husband who to talk to, that’s his call, but by no means do you have to be ok with his friend saying that. Jesus people why do you want men to be jerks and women to be doormats? Who would actually want that?
I can’t believe so many women say “its juts a joke”… Umm she said it made her feel violated. So now its ok to violate a woman verbally, because its a joke? Don’t think so.
I’d tell my husband it hurt me, and to tell his friend to respect me, that it was out of line or he doesn’t need to come around you, you can’t pick your husbands friends, but it is his job to make you feel protected, and loved. If he can’t do that, tell the guy your self. Don’t ever let a man, or anyone disrespect you.
Ugh what a pig. He needs to be put in his place. U need to cuss him out and let him have it. Probably aint got much to blow no how.
If my husbands friend days this shit he’d tell his bitch ass off and stop speaking to him like wtf! Joke or not, shit is disrespectful!
That’s absolutely wrong and disrespectful!
How in the helm are they still friends. Maybe it’s a cultural thing? Those would be fighting words. The nerve and the fact that he felt comfortable enough to say that is… beyond comprehension.
If anyone dismisses this, they would probably tolerate some abuse.
Should have just said “small things are choking hazards” or “i cant,im allergic to shrimp” or just been blunt and tell him to f off…Yes,youre hubby probably should have said something,BUT we’re women,not helpless…We can defend ourselves too,yanno?
Ooooh- if anyone would have said to my husband we would have been at their door and they would have had a fist in their mouth and a foot in their ass.
If it were me, i would tell him. “Hey i heard what you said and so did my son and i don’t appreciate that talk so out of respect for me and him, don’t say anything like that again about kay thanks”
Whether it was “meant as a joke” or not it was absolutely unacceptable and disrespectful. My fiancé would have been pissed and put him right in his place. No “friend” should talk to or about his friends wife like that. Disgusting.
I’d say somthing to him myself, but that’s just me.
And no this isn’t “guy talk” this is PIG talk.
Hey a blow job is way better then paying him. Suck his dick like you owe him the world.
Y’all are fucked up fr. A joke is a joke because it is FUNNY. This is not a joke. He may have intended it that way, but clearly it did not come off like that. If your husband won’t check his friend, you do it. Say ‘listen, you probably don’t even remember saying this, but it affected me a great deal and I still find myself thinking about it. What you said was disgusting because x y z.’ Also, he said this, knowing full well a child was listening in, TRASH HUMAN.
If anyone said that about me my husband would tell them to watch their mouth. That is not cool. Especially with your child in the car.
I think its funny however inappropriate because it was a business conversation…you should be asking your hubby what conversations they are having together that he allows that talk
I mean it was clearly just a joke but if it’s bothered you this much then talk to the friend and tell hi. you were offended by the joke and to please try to not make sexual jokes around you anymore
Oh hell people I have been with my man for 18years … if you cant joke with a married man or woman about sex acts of sorts then your taking life to serious… yes ok inappropriate with the child in the car but as someone else said your 5 year old shouldn’t even know what a blow job is … laugh it off and tell the guy you wouldn’t even tickle his balls if you were paid to
You have boundaries and that’s great but enforce them, maybe tell your husband you didn’t like that comment for yourself or your child and just have him mention it to him for future reference. That’s all
I think I wouldn’t have to say anything but I would probably need to bail my hubby out
your husbands friend will tell you alot about your husbands character
It shows the value the friend puts on women, and the friendship and his lack of respect for women. The husband should of ended the friendship.
I would no longer be friends with him
He crossed the line big time
It is NOT OKAY or normal for this shit to happen. My husband would’ve told him that’s not okay to say ever and nevermind about helping us, we don’t want anything to do with you.
If in person, I guarantee I’d have to be scrounging up money to bail him out of jail for decking that disrespectful asshole.
You don’t talk about anyone that way. Especially not your fucking friends WIFE.
My husband would never let that fly because he is a gentleman. It reminds me of “boys will be boys”. Somehow it’s acceptable to behave a certain way if you’re a male. Not in my household though. My husband and son are both gentlemen.
It was a joke, laugh it off. Hes not actually wanting a blow job as payment
Yep just asked my hubby and he said, “That’s how the fight started.”
Yes it was inappropriate to be heard by a child but other than that I don’t see a problem with it. It’s a joke.
Wtf lol maybe your hubby is a cuck. Lol nah but he was very disrespectful imo I’d be like wtf as well like control your nasty ass friends
Maybe loosen the rod up your arse?
Men banter. Shit. So do women.
Set him up with one of your friends that’s single and would give him a BJ.
Well he isn’t gonna get no kids by putting it there!!! Sorry, had to laugh. I’m guessing that’s WHY he isn’t married. But seriously, all jokes aside, your husband shouldn’t let him disrespect you like that.
My husband would have punched him in the face.
what an Idiot and so is your husband for allowing him to disrespect you like that
To all the moms saying this is just how guys are I sure as shit would hate to see how your sons turn out. And I hope your daughters date someone just like this and they say something about her blowing them in front of you and then you can go ahead and write it off like oh that’s just how guys are.
I wouldnt be ok with this either, it’s a disgusting comment. I’d make sure that he knows where my boundries are, I’d politely tell him that is was a gross comment to make and that he should have a little more respect. I’d also tell him how it made you feel and that you wish for him to refrain from making such comments about you in the future. Also your husband should have stuck up for you
So what is the argument about lol there us no actual question so idk it was probably just a joke guys do talk like that. He’s probably said that about many women. I mean like the guy can’t get a bj somewhere else? Like we women dont say stupid nasty things? Lighten the fug up. I mean what do you want your husband to do beat him up? Is he supposed to lose a friend to please you? Not too controlling there huh? Get over it let him handle it you made him your husband so you entrusted him to handle things also. If it becomes a repeated problem then handle it yourself not like you need hubbys permission.
He’s a single lonely guy. Believe it or not that’s how “most” guess talk. We all have that one friend that shouldn’t be in speaker, I guess you found your husbands lol
You need to stay far away from him…he says what he wants an ur husband thinks hes joking untill one day he makes his move on u…an then what…
I would tell my husband if that friend is ever coming to our home you need to tell me ahead of time so I can leave and if you don’t I will leave permanently
It’s called a joke lol
My husband would have knocked his face in. Period.
I can’t believe this is in 2 pages tho. Lol
The husband should have at least said something and made him apologize to you at the very least. Mine would probably have punched the guy while I would have come back with, “when and where” but I’m more of a joker then he is. Plus my husband wouldnt really be friends with guys that joke like that in the first place.
Listen, I joke around inappropriately with my husband’s friends and coworkers. I don’t have any sticks up my ass.
If my husband told me that one of his friends said that, I’d roll my eyes and let it go.
But if dude knew he was on speaker and he had the audacity to joke about that in front of me (especially if he knew the kid was there, but I’d like to think that he didn’t), fuck whatever my husband had to say, I can speak up for myself just fine. And you best believe he’d hear what I had to say about it! You know, even if he didn’t know he was on speaker, I’d straighten him out on where the line is between us. And I’d let him know if he ever fucking crossed it again in front of me, ain’t nobody gonna be able to give him a blow job after I’m done with him.
But I wouldn’t expect my husband to stop speaking to him. I’d make damn sure they both learned that day, though.
It was a joke not a dick, don’t take it so hard.