Y’all need to stop tell her to “just move out” y’all have no idea what type of situation is going on they could be saving and trying to move out all of this could very well be temporary you need to tell her that’s its not her child to stop answering to mama and the walking things isn’t a big deal to me
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Get your own place!!
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I have a question are these grandparents helping you through the day? So that you all can work to get out on y’all own!
As a grandparent I have gotten so upset with anyone thinking that we want to be there parents! We have done our work! We have raised ours and now grandparents get the blame for spoiling or getting too close to our grand children! In a grandparents shoes it’s the best times of our life’s! I have said this and will always believe it! One day as your children get older and you look forward to becoming a grandparent never say you won’t feel the same!!!
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Grandma answering to mommy, no, ABSOLUTELY NOT. (Just have a conversation with gma)
Walking and teaching, absolutely okay. Move out tho! ASAP!
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If moving out isn’t an option, setting boundaries is an option. However, your MIL might not realize that she’s overstepping.
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if u see something say something
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To answer your question. You have every right to feel what you feel. But you really need to sit down and discuss this with your husband. Heart it out to him, tell him what hurts you, what bothers you, why it bothers you. Make him listen and understand your point of view, or at least respect it. Then you can both decide what kind of limitations you’re going to give the grandparents.
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Mother in laws are so overbearing. They really fit the cliche.
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Grandparents often feel entitled to their grandchildren because they see them as their own children. However, they forget what it was like to be the parent with overbearing grandparents taking away their authority. The same way our parents didn’t like it done to them they need to be reminded that it’s not acceptable to do it to you.
Talk to your husband, and then together stand your ground when a grandparent tries to take over. That whole, answering to mom should have been corrected immediately. Excuse you? I’M mom, my children’s ONLY mom. My child said MOM not grandma, and you’re GRANDMA not mom. They’re asking for me. That’s a title YOU earned and deserve to maintain exclusive to you. Own it. As for walking, I understand there are things we, especially first time parents like to experience and do ourselves. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. So make it clear, thank you, we appreciate it but that’s something WE want to do. Some people don’t care and would rather step aside and let someone else take over the responsibilities gladly but if that’s not you, just remind them kindly. If they belittle you then you need to put them in their place.
I do highly recommend that you get your own place ASAP. Often living together blurs boundaries for those who feel entitled because they’re helping and though it shouldn’t be that way it often is, unfortunately. Especially if they help you care for your children. The easiest way to avoid any “confusion” as to rights and authority is to live separately and not depend on them for childcare.
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Quit sponging and get the life you want.
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You have every right to feel this way. They are horribly overstepping their bounds, and you and your husband need to talk with them about it. Grandma answering to mama is just creepy man. Does she try to breastfeed him too?!
Been there done that, took my daughter and got an apartment. Best decision ever made
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You need to voice your concerns, but make sure you have another place to go, if not, it should be your first priority!!! Its never a good idea to live with in laws!!!
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Move out! You shouldn’t raise your children with grandparents and if you do then expect them to give advice and they do it out of love
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I am a Grandmother and would not answer to Mama unless the child only says Mama and/ or Mama isn’t there. As far as teaching to walk, I would think you would enjoy the help and the time being spent with your child. Some children never get to meet or spend time with a Grandparent. Personally, I think you should try to find the positive in this rather than being negative. You will be happier. The child will know you are the Mama! Enjoy your little one!
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Hold your ground now before to late you are momma they only grandma
Your living in there house don’t like it find some place of your own
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It’s not a big deal lol I guess if they’re trying to get the baby to call them mama then that is a big deal, but be happy that you have that sort of support system.
Well you are liveing with them. Move out
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Time to move… As long as you are living there they have control. Be fiscally responsible. MOVE
You are definitely right to feel hurt. YOU are aloud to feel whatever way you want. Don’t let anyone make you feel like your feelings arnt validated. Your a new mom and moments like that are SUPER important to a first time mom or ANY mom. Stand your ground, make it KNOWN that first moments like that are for you as a mother and if she wants to watch you that’s fine but she can’t do things that you don’t want her to with YOUR child. Maybe she just wants to be more involved and I get that but you should work with her on those milestones or tell her to enjoy watching you and him experience them.
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What is it hurting…other than your feelings???
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Omg get over it or move out. My kids call my mom, their grandma, mom, but they know who their mom is. It’s just because I call her mom and they hear me say it. I live on my own, but she watches them while I work. I missed their first word and my second’s steps. They are helping you out!!! Remember that!
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You’re allowed to feel however you want about it. If it hurts you then maybe say something to the in laws not out of anger but hurt. It’s also ok for your husband to not be hurt by it, but he should still support you.
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I would get a different sitter if there are so many issues.
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It can be a big deal, but as long as you are living with them you will need to pick your battles. Best resolution is move as soon as you can.
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You have the right to feel that way and this totally different but my mom watch both my daughter and son so we could work and I miss out on a lot for that her first step her being potty train. It’s hard when you have to live with in laws or they live with you never good two families living under the same roof.
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You’re under her roof. If you don’t like it move out. Simple. They’re going to help raise your kid too. If having them teach him how to walk maybe you should step your game out and do it yourself.
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you have a right to your feelings. Period.
What is it with MILs ?!
Your the mom you want to reach him to walk yes you should be upset
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It takes a village to raise children, and this is only your first. Many people would LOVE to have the support of an involved set of Grands. I admit the Mama thing is way off, I am my children’s ONLY mother, but the walking thing ?? Next will you ask them not to encourage talking ?? You live in their home, they are by default extended parents, as involved and time entered almost as much as you. Either quit looking a gift horse in the mouth and accept the help with clear boundaries on names, or move out and let them be normal grands. But…do your best to not estranged them. You will miss that later…
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They probably think they are just helping the little one develop. I’m sure it’s never crossed their minds that you don’t think they should do that. They are the grandparents so they want to help and be involved and it should go without saying that they will be a little more overbearing cuz you live in their house
You should be thankful. They speak to you and your children and you live off them. Wow. Talk about ungrateful and hateful.
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Oh honey it’s ok to feel every kind of way. I think your husband needs to support you a little more and go with your wishes. My wife and I have had talks when something is bothering me and she will always stand up for me and our son. I know they are excited to be grandparents but this 1st moments we will not get back and yes you are aloud to feel that way. I have some of the best in laws but somethings that have been done upset me and I just had to talk to my wife about it and she would handle it sometimes not the way I would have but it got done. Good luck mama it’s a hard road.
Had a very similar issue with my MIL…it almost caused our divorce. Now almost 15 years later (our daughter just turned 12) we stopped talking to her for 2 years, now we are getting to the point where there is some respect.
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Problem solved talk to them!! Maybe they don’t even realize there over stepping!!!
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Why is there always someone on her complaining about their in laws. Cripes at least they care. My daughters grandma is in prison for trying to stab someone with scissors over drugs…no one is trying to take your baby. No one is trying to step on toes. Quit being so sensitive. Be greatful you have in laws who love your baby and want to be in your life.
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Having lost my MIL who was very involved with my baby, I yearn for her guidance and ‘overstepping’ daily.
The only thing better than a loving mother watching over her baby is a bunch of loving mothers watching - Even if that means you see the second steps instead of first. This life is short and cruel - don’t take away a moment of love or care bestowed on your child.
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Hopefully the mama thing is by mistake. Also my 1.5 year old says mama and gramma and they sound very alike maybe with a different tone or emphasis. My mil has called herself mom and my husband has done it by accident too. I admit I dont love it but it’s an honest mistake. If she wants to baby to call her mama then its weird and out of line.
The walking thing is probably just because they’re excited. Just tell them you appreciate that they want to help and that they are excited but it’s a milestone you dont want to miss if you can help it and maybe you can work on it together.
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You sound ungrateful. The woman is nice enough to allow you to live with her and watch your baby. If you don’t like it move out and you watch the baby.
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My daughter used to call my mom mama because she could not say “Grandma” - maybe try Teaching her to call grandma Mimi instead of Grandma or a different but easy to say word for her. I understand where you’re coming from with the walking thing but you’re going to have to come to terms with the fact that you’re not going to be the one that teaches your child all of her firsts. It’s impossible. I was the same way once upon a time but I’ve learned that being a mom is really hard and it really does take a village to raise a child. Try to see things in a different light and appreciate that your child has somebody else that wants to teach them these things and be an active person in her life. If she was teaching her to say shit or doing something nasty I would be concerned but trying to help her reach a milestone in their life is a good thing. My son is delayed in every thing he does. Never crawled, late to walk, two years old and still can’t talk. I would give anything to hear my son say mama. I don’t care if he calls the mailman mama at this point I just want to hear him say the word. 
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I know how you feel 
I dont live with his parents but when we visit, I dont matter to anyone there. No one respects me as his mother. Its annoying. And when i successfully teach my son something and he does it or says it there at their house. Some how magically they get credit for teaching him that. 🤦
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I went off on my OWN mom for trying to teach my kid how to walk! Men don’t understand how special it is for us mothers to teach our children things. And as for her answering to mom, Id lose my fucking shit on her 
sounds like it’s time to get your own place!
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In laws are the worst ! I swear, you are the parents not them… seems like in laws just don’t get it
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They may not even realize my baby took his first steps at my moms house when he spent the night. I feel like you will see plenty of when hea starting to talk and fast after 2 or 3 steps the exciting part is when he starts walking across the room!
Honestly you seem like you are overreacting.
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When I babysat my nephew I tried to help him walk, i encouraged him to do a lot of things, I wasn’t trying to make his mom and dad miss important milestones. When the baby goes to daycare will you not want them to help potty train? Not help teach the ABCs? It literally takes a village to raise a baby. The grandparents are just helping.
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I would be thankful. I think they’re trying to help. I would just establish some boundaries but also understand that your baby is being loved and nurtured and that’s what matters the most here.
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They are only trying to help dont think you should be mad at this action
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It takes a village to raise a child. You might not see that now but you will.
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I second that the answer isnt just “move out”, my parents live with us bc of health issues and we have had to work really hard setting boundaries etc. We still dont have it figured out, but the main thing is COMMUNICATE. Even if you have have to sit down and write out what you want to say. That’s what I have to do! Preface it it with how much you appreciate the help and how much they love your child but that you feel like you are missing out on important milestones and things in life. You aren’t angry, just dont want to miss stuff!
And make sure you sit down and talk to your husband about all of it too. Make sure he understands that even if he doesn’t agree or feel the same way you do he should support you and do what he can to back you up.
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Id talk to them…but my mom and stepdad are the ones who taught my daughter to walk… she was running by 10months
A. Consider yourself LUCKY to have in laws who love your baby and are willing to help. Many young parents dont have that luxury
B. As for her answering to mama well she is a mama and that may be out of habit. 3. You obviously are staying at thier home for a reason. Possibly you cannot afford a place of your own. Whatever the reason you should be grateful for all they do for you. After all they have already raised thier kids. Clearly they did somewhat of a good job at that since you have shacked up with thier son.
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You can’t make a child walk before they are ready, no matter how much you coach them. You’re getting upset for no reason.
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I think you should be grateful for grandparents to be very involved. I’m thankful to have amazing in laws and my mom is also very wonderful. None of them ever try to over step, but if i wouldn’t mind if they were trying to teach my child how to walk while I wasn’t there.
My in laws do the same thing. We live in the same neighborhood but we used to live with them. It’s mainly with my daughter. They don’t have much to do with my son
Omg are you serious…this is her grandbaby shes just as excited as you…it sounds to me like you have a jealousy issue why not let her enjoy an spoil that baby…so many go through life without grandparents…maybe you should think of getting your own place after all its time to be an adult an provide for your family instead of defending on someone else to provide a place for your family to live…just saying
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So are you teaching your child to walk?
I mean we used to take care of my niece since she was 4 months, and when my parents used to pick me up from school my niece was almost a year and they tried to make her walk, I used to help her too. And she started to walk with me…
My uncle wasn’t mad not even my aunt.
With my kids my dad used to make my daughters walk, and my cousin too… so it’s not big deal…
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I completely cut off my soon to be ex husband’s family for less then this 🤷🏻
My family knows not to try sh!t with me because they will be put in their place so fast they will get whiplash…
I’m currently living with my grandparents and the only problem I have is Grandma feeding her mostly cookies and apple cider every time she’s home… But that’s Grandma’s house so I dont actually know that happens 
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Seriously, get out. Do it all on your own.
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I feel as if you live with in laws you take the understanding they are going to step in it’s “grandma/grandpa” house . If your child went to daycare they would try to help the child walk. In-laws just want to be grandparents but honestly who care who teaches them to wal
k as long as the are healthy and progressive with growth and development.
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The answering to mama, and going against your word I would absolutely be upset about and you should address that. Helping your child learn to walk seems nice of her though. 
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I had a MIL like this. CRAZY. Go to family counseling ASAP and look into emergency housing. As well as housing programs in your area. I am stuck with my dad but he is pretty respectful. Try to be proactive, and remember to stand up for yourself! Even if it means that it causes trouble! Your voice should be allowed to be heard where ever you are. It honestly sounds emotional abusive. If you can’t move out have weekly family meetings! You’re the mom and you have the final day for YOUR Family not hers! She can make rules but she has no right to try and be a mom to your child.
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Some people make you feel like if they’re helping you, you’re obligated to give them the upper hand in all aspects of your life. DO NOT feel obligated to let them walk all over you just because they are helping. You HAVE TO have open communication. Telling your in laws what bothers you in a nice but firm way can’t hurt. They may not know you’re bothered if you don’t tell them. People aren’t mind readers, ya know…
I think you’re completely overreacting. “Making him walk” sounds extremely over dramatic, first off. She can’t make him walk. She is probably assisting and encouraging him to walk which is HEALTHY and you should appreciate the help and the time and the love she is putting into your child. And responding to mama…well she is a mama too so it may be instinct. Or maybe she wants to respond to the baby when he is asking for you because she wants to lessen your burden.
Your mother in law sounds like an angel, she is letting you live in her home and helping care for your child which god knows no mother wants to do alone. I think rather than criticizing her online to strangers, you should be thanking her.
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You sound like you are in a complicated situation. When there is a little one around everyone adopts a ‘it takes a village’ mentality so everyone under that roof is going try to help that child develop. It’s ok to be emotional and feel every which way, this is your first and you’ve never been through any of this kind of stuff before. Just step back and try to see the bigger picture, you have a collective trying give this child every advantage they can. Now if she is truly over stepping her boundaries in other matters and you can’t talk it out civilly or look past it then you very much need to move into your own home or your environment is going to become toxic. Like I said, this is complicated, you are a mother trying to raise her child in another woman’s home, if you guys can’t see eye to eye then this living arrangement isn’t going to work. Also I apologize if It’s the other way around such as your in laws are living with YOU. Did not want to make assumptions.
The reason you feel this way is because you’re a first time mom, and it is very understandable to feel as if she is over stepping but she means no harm believe me I felt the same way when my sister would say “this is my son too” but I soon realized that they are your biggest asset to your child, they will simply help you and don’t worry your baby knows who you are but let grandma enjoy that baby too.
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Grandma answering to mama is a concern but the walking not so much.
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Your feelings are valid. I’m going to go against the grain and say yes, they are nice opening up their home, but that’s also your child and you have a right in saying what happens with your child.
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I lived with my parents for five years with my son after having him.
My mom was doing the same things you mentioned.
The sad part is, she only changed when she she lost any good relationship with me. I can hardly stand to be around her anymore.
It’s probably worse being the daughter in law.
It’s so hard when you live with them because I always felt guilty for speaking up.
Try to get out of there as hard as you can. Having that anger constantly is not good for you.
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They had their time with their own children. You are allowed and entitled to your child’s firsts and milestones.
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It takes a village to raise a child x
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Who the fuck lives with their in laws? What did you expect fool.
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I went through the same thing with my 1st. With my 1st and he was the son and the only grandchild. My in laws did everything. They held him the whole time and when I went to sleep I couldn’t take care of him or held him. Now I got 4. Whew… moments lol
My in laws do the same thing. I don’t live with them, thank God, but they try to play my son against us. That’s the main reason he doesn’t see those grandparents often. Your feelings are very valid. You’re entitled to feel how you want. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Try taking control of the situation. That’s your child after all, not theirs.
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Little kids needs a lot of repetition. Try telling your mil that when your son calls her mama to correct him and say grandma. Yes mama is easier but the more he here’s grandma from her the better. My son did that as well and my mil would answer him (out of habit) then correct him. As for walking, that’s normal to practice walking with a baby who’s trying to walk on his own. My son was up holding on to everything but if they’re down on the ground forcing it, I would make it a point to your husband that that moment is for you guys and you’d like for them to stop forcing it and let it happen on it’s own. More communication and let him see how much is upsets you. Men can be blind. My husband never knows I’m really upset until I cry
As someone who lived with my inlaws untill I had my second. I can’t tell you what to do but I can say this. It’s never once, it’ll get so much worse. My oldest learned that as soon as they were home what I said doesn’t matter. They wouldn’t let me teach her to sleep on her own, she’s was two and I had my second in my belly for 6 months almost. It gets worse. Alot worse for me… I got out over a month ago and I’m so much happier. It’ll take time but leave.
My EX MIL was just like that. I divorced him for always choosing her story, side whatever it was. Your husband married YOU. His mom needs to step back and he needs to have your back 200%
I’m a grandma an i know how important it is to the first step the first everything should be left for the parents not the GRANDPARENTS (ASK FIRST)
It’s funny when my dad does this I start over stepping my boundaries on his personal relationships. Meaning I start telling his girlfriends the shit he does and well sorry not sorry.
Even if u live in their house those boundaries dont need to be crossed and once u start over stepping boundaries with them simply say once u leave my son alone I’ll leave that boundary alone
Would it have bothered you as bad if it had been your mother? Everybody helped our daughter learn to walk!! What’s the big deal?
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I wouldn’t worry too much about gma responding to “mama”. I babysit three toddlers and two of them call me “mama” when they want something. They know my name and will say it (or something similar) when I tell them to but when they’re caught up in a moment of need it’s always, “Mama!” I used to babysit a little boy who referred to me AND my husband as “Mama” when he wanted something. In toddler speak “mama” isn’t much different than “waitress” 
I would talk to them about teaching your little one to walk. Obviously, you want to be there when they take their first steps and your in-laws should understand and respect that. When my girls were ready to start to walking I didn’t encourage them much unless my husband was home because I knew he wanted to be present for that huge milestone <3
I truly would not worry about it…There will be so many more moments for you/your husband. The excitement of being a grandparent is sometimes hard to control.
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Move out or knock her out 
Yall are first time parents. And as the mother your gonna feel a way about this more.
I did.
We lived with my mil and sils when our first was born. I felt a way all the time. Lol.
I was aggervated about everything i wanted to do first.
An the soda thing and pictures all over fb was the worst to me.
I think what pissed me off more was that they literally didnt care enough about me to just hear me out. Looking back that was the most of it.
Listening to someone is the same as valuing that person. The same as respecting that person.
We moved out and life was great on our own until my side of the family started…i was blinded to it for a long time.
Then when i looked back at living with my mil i missed it and felt bad for leaving. Because what i wanted ao bad really wasnt that great. "Except the part of having our own house " that is priceless.
So again we moved. We now have two children and bought our home last year. My mil livea beside us and honestly im happy. So happy.
Alot of it is being heard. Thats the biggest part of all.
Alot of it is your own space. That is a big part of it too.
The only thing i dont want to hear is someone getting my kids to cussing like its funny cause because of their stupid choices my kids get introuble for it.
Ive created this mindset that what you do at nanas is at nanas. No i dont want them cussing or doing stupid shit. Like that.
But hey if nana or so and so lets you act like a rabid animal over there fine lol but home is home and we dont act that way here.
Ik its hard to look ahead a few years but i guarentee you’re gonna look back and realize it wasnt all bad. Being heard and having space is two important things in parenting and its ok if they come late. But just know its not as bad as you think.
Amswering to mama instead of correcting to gma or whatever she is to be called is overstepping. Trying to teach your child is not. Be happy you have a positive influence helping teach your child things. Not everyone has that. I’m sure you want to be the one to get the child to take their first steps. Then make sure you’re spending the time teaching and interacting with your child. Instead of being bitter, encourage as much teaching/ learning as possible. The young years are the most critical learning years.
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We’ll move into your own place.their home their rules.have you talked to them first or just go straight to FB.
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You’re being so dramatic they’re grandparents they love your kid as much as you of course they try and get him or her to walk they didn’t know you’d be upset if they tried?? Nobody would think someone would be upset if you tried to let there baby walk… like are you ok? Clearly you have some other issues that need to be dealt with since your over reacting over such a little thing. if you don’t want someone to do something say IT. Don’t bring it to Facebook. Like it’s like communication ever heard of it??? Use your words.
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Talk it out or move out. A friendly warning talking it out might bring more tension so moving out would probably be your best option. You won’t have to abide by anyone else’s rules or overstepping boundaries. You will be able to raise your kid the way you want to in your own space. Living with others is hard enough and if you’re growing a family you will need your own space and peace. Its probably best if you look for your own place to avoid conflicts between your inlaws or your husband. Been there and it’s not easy.
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The worries of these days… Hahahaaha. Australia is burning, world war 3 impending, plastic ruining our oceans, and climate changes… Wow
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I would definitely have put a stop to her answering to mama a long time ago. Why would she let your child think it’s ok to call her that? Way over stepping. As far as trying to get him to walk, I wouldn’t be that upset. Yeah I’d be disappointed to miss his first steps if that happened but everyone is excited to see babys milestones whether its walking, clapping, talking or anything else so I think it’s normal for family to want to encourage those developments. I wouldn’t expect anyone to watch my 4 month old and not let him get any type of play/excersise in just because I might miss him do something new. Ultimately I would try to move out if theres issues that are causing you to feel uncomfortable in the environment that you stay in. In the meantime while you save money to move, you should try to spend more time with your in laws while they’re watching the baby. That way you wont miss much, you can correct gma when she answers to mama and maybe setting those boundaries and seeing them in place will help you feel better. Getting a break is always nice but maybe once in a while you can spend that break with your in laws and the baby.
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Them getting your baby to walk isn’t a bad thing. It’s OK for her to encourage that.
Answering to mama is NOT OK. People saying “their house, their rules” nah that’s BS when it comes to answering to mama. My daughter and I currently live with my parents and i have always been mommy.
There needs to be healthy boundaries set between yall especially when it comes to the baby!
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Get out of the house! Free yourself!
Move out of home I have always said never live with others when you have a child they always try to overstep your boundaries there is nothing you can do while living under her roof get your own place figure your money issues out and move whatever the reason is that your even living there has to go now if uses are there because your saving for a home of your own put that one the back of your list get a little cheap rental and save from there there is nothing you can do while she is the one putting the roof over your head…PS I’m with everyone else on the walking thing your to up yourself over that tbh but the calling her mama thing that’s a big no you will look back on the walking thing and understand that it’s not that big of an issue as you are trying to make it out to be but calling her mama thats to far…
My son calls my mom “mom” sometimes and I think it is because it is what I call her… She also encouraged him to walk when he showed interest and she was actually the one who saw his first steps. I personally love the bond my son and his Grandma have. If you are living together then it is inevitably going to happen that your in laws will play a large part in your child’s life. If you’re going to get upset over it then you need to do a reevaluation of your living situation and figure out how to change it.
Oh goodness grown up. Be thankful you have and a place to live and extra set of hands to help. . You should be grateful that grandma loves your child. All children will call caregivers mama at times. You’re the mother and no one can replace you. Build a better relationship with your in-laws. Remember it takes a village.
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Timothys wife - i live with my mother in law. All they want to do is be there every waking moment they are theyre grandbabys. I learned alot about being a parent. And walking was the hardest thing my son could do bbut all them memorys are precious to them they will pass happy about the little things first word. First step. All the 1sts are important to them too.
Sit down and have a civil convo with them and explain. I know u want to be there for All theyre 1sts but u want to try to do it first
All the help in the world is awesome
It takes 2 people to make a baby but it takes the whole village(family) to teach and raise them with u.
I honestly love having grama in picture. Some over step they’re boundrys but im pretty sure if they love u to. Just explain to them u want to do it being 1st time mommy. When they walk is when they are ready