I’d tell them a few things that they probably wouldn’t want to hear! But I’d feel better! Go for it, they’re your kids and now his too!
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Push! But may be like trying to move a concrete statue 
No you are not the Ass. She should be ashamed of herself. Childrens feelings are involved.
The kids deserve better. Obviously she can’t be an adult so find something special to do with the older 2 while the younger one is with her and use some of those days to have something special with all 3. She may miss out on opportunities with the younger one when family time is set for all 3. Her loss.
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Your MIL is terrible. We gained a granddaughter when our son remarried & love her as if she were born into our family! We don’t have “step” anything in our vocabulary. Your MIL needs to learn this.
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Mother in law should be told ALL OR NONE.
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Your HUSBAND should advocate for your older children as much as you do. If he has a problem and address it your MIL would most likely see your point. Both your husband and his mother need to get it together. On the other hand; explain to your children what is going on so they will no longer expect differently. Use the time your MIL spends with your bonus child to do special things with your children… of course not every time but every once a while could be good, like mother/children day out or in with simple things if money is a issue.
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You can not force a relationship.
Just because you are able to love wholehearted and unconditionally, does not mean that everyone has that ability.
Blended families are sometimes tricky to make work.
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They are so selfish!
Yeah I mean it’s not your kid or your kids grandma. Kind of not your place to give ultimatums to a child you didn’t birth, to a mom who isn’t your mom.
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My MIL only accepts my husbands son from a previous relationship. Not our daughter nor my kids from previous. My husband seen how it hurt the kids time after time and he tried to talk to her many times. He chose to cut her off. My family nor the other kids family exclude any of the kids. So she shouldn’t.
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I know what this feels like
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Favoritism has absolutely no place in a relationship with children. Either spend time with them all or none of them 
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Show your kids the love they deserve. They should care about all the children but you can’t make that happen.
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Nope. Segregation in children is not ok.
If they can not respect your childrens feelings, they don’t deserve to have time with them.
I’m sorry you have to go through this. I know exactly how this feels as a mother.
I find it easier explaining to my kids the situation than pushing someone to be a decent human.
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Your in-laws seem immature and unwilling to support your family unit. If you force the issue though, they may take your kids along with their grandson, but still treat them differently while they are with them. I would explain to your kids that your in-laws are not their grandparents and it will take time for them to come to accept them the same as their grandson. While the favored one is away, provide something special for your two.
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How old are the older kids? Are they old enough to understand why she treats them differently? When she takes the younger one you do something with the older ones. Really sucks because you miss your bonding time with your husband son then but it’s really not fair. What a hard spot to be in
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she is missing out…do things on the weekends his child will not want to miss…he will begin to desire staying home…keep ur family together…she will start to be left out… it may be the only way to work your family…
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Love them all and treat them equally or regret it later.
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Don’t let the baby go anymore. We don’t do favoritism.
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They are selfish and disrespectful to the other children don’t let they see that one and only child it’s not right or fair like I said I wouldn’t let any child go with her until she can be fair
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It’s a package deal. But she’s given you her answer, you either push harder and will likely be met with an even worse response or turbulence in your marriage or respectfully explain to the other children her negligence towards them is no fault of their own. “Sometimes there’s not nice people in this world, and she’s one of them”. But being nice to rude people is always the best karma.
Do your parents treat them all the same?
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I think you should talk to your husband about this and get on the same page. You guys need to support each other. If you guys are a forever couple, then this should probably be addressed or this will eventually create trauma and resentment.
Hang in there mama
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They need equal treatment as they are all family now, no exceptions.
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So you and your family should accept his kid but his side can’t accept yours? BS! How would they feel if it was the other way around? I’d keep all my kids and mother and father in law can one see them but no longer at their house or on any outings. Period. And if that’s how they act why would you want them in any of their lives? I wouldn’t. My opinion.
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You’re not being an ass and the two children not included could end up being resentful towards her. Explaining this to them won’t make a difference because they’re going to feel the way they feel. If it were me, I’d let her know she’s welcome to take all 3 children on excursions and if she can’t, then they all stay home. If she doesn’t understand the reason for this, then explain to her why. Your husband also needs to support this decision as well. Sometimes people can be clueless.
Its as simple as this. There is always two sides to problems like this. Its never one sided there is always more to the story than what is being said. If I new both sides of the story or anyone else I think you would get some very good advice.
Your husband should step up and tell his mom that it is not right. When he got with you he took on the role of a step dad. If he can’t do it then kick him to the curb.
Nothing I hate more than favoritism. It’s sad there is so much of that in families.
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It’s definitely up to your husband to put his foot down since they are his parents he needs to have all three children include the same
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So the kids are not any relation to her?
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Have you talked to your husband about this…what is his take? It seems to me you and he need to have an agreement before you decide how to deal with His mother.
I mean, it’s too bad they don’t want the same kind of relationship, but they’re not related to your kids and you can’t force them to.
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It’s not up to you, but your husband to deal with HIS parents! But let me ask you, do you expect your parents to take his kid?
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That’s the way it’s suppose to be.Always believed that.
I know this feeling my brothers wife my sister in law only like one of my kids her and my brother always bring my one child Jordan shoes and outfits and necklaces I can see that it affects my other kids they ask me why don’t they like us and I asked my brother and there excuse is they don’t have a big enough car I hate seeing my other kids crying so I told them no more unless it’s for all the kids
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Why would you want to force someone to have a relationship with your kids??? They need to be around people that love and care for them naturally not forced….not sure about the relationship they have with your parents or their fathers parents …it’s not fair and it’s not right but clearly she doesn’t accept you kids as her grandchildren
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Its because she doesn’t view your kids as her grandkids. Sorry just being honest
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Like said above speak to your husband about It. I think they should be involved in days out and things as your a married couple and I bet he treats them as if there his own kids and you treat his just the same. My mum would never treat my partners children like that or I’d be causing hell with her. Again talk to your husband about how upset you and the kids are about it and let him deal with his parents. Good luck.
They all need to be included if not stop all visits and no your not an ass
With my parents, my oldest sister isn’t my dads daughter but my dad’s mother and my uncles & aunties all accept my moms oldest child as their grand-daughter and my auntie’s and uncles accepted my sister as their niece. My dad’s mother told my dad. Christine has an older daughter that’s not your blood. You got to accept her as your own daughter or your relationship with Christine won’t work. I honestly didn’t know we had different dad’s until I was 16 years old. I never heard it from my sister or my parents but heard it from my cousin on my moms side. So I finally asked them and they told me the truth. I would of never guessed bc my dad treats my older sister as his own daughter!! My grandma’s husband also had no children with my granny and he accept her kids as his own.
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Ooooo I feel this so hard.
I don’t see anything wrong w it being like that… your kids are not their grandkids and you need to explain that to the kids… you’ve knows his parents for 2 years?? Things might change in the future but I wouldn’t force the relationship right now