I need advice. My in-laws don’t like me and I think it’s because I can’t have kids. I’ve been with my husband for 10 years and the first 5 years were very rough and had a bad relationship with his family. We tried for years to get pregnant and after 7 years we finally got pregnant. The same night we found out about the baby, we also found out it was ectopic so we had to rush into surgery to save my life and of course sadly my one and only baby wasn’t going to make it. That was the most traumatic experience of my life and not one of our family members was there for us during that time. Not even my own mom came to see me in the hospital and that’s caused a lot of mental damage to me. After that I was diagnosed with postpartum depression, PTSD, and I suffer major abandonment issues from that experience. My in-laws have shown no sympathy to me or their son about our experience and it really takes a toll out on me. I moved from a different state away from all my loved ones to be closer to the in-laws and they literally act like we don’t live 2 minutes down the road from them. They never try to spend time with us, come over to visit, nothing. While I see how good they treat their other daughter in law who does have kids. It really makes me feel like they don’t like me because I can’t have kids and I’m super depressed right now. I never had a good relationship with my own parents, so I always hoped I would marry into a family that loved me like their own but it’s just not like that. But it is like that with their other daughter in law and son in law. The only difference is, they have kids and I don’t. I take care of their son, I love him unconditionally and he loves me the same so I can’t understand why they still don’t like me. I do have a bad past but I’ve been living a straight path for 3 years now so I don’t see what the problem is now? We still try to get pregnant 3 years after our loss but it’s just not happening. My mental health is not good right now, and I could really use a family to turn to but they would never be there for me because they don’t like to talk about the loss. I’m so lost
I’m so sorry girl. I think talking to your husband would help a lot, you guys are partners and I’m sure he feels the same way you do about it all. As for his parents, I wouldn’t even let it bother you. Distance yourself, which sounds do-able since they act like you guys don’t live close anyways. Even if you have a bad past you’re still doing better for yourself & not being able to have kids was not your choice. There’s no reason for their behavior. If it bothers you maybe your husband can talk to them & see what’s up. Maybe you and your husband could discuss adoption… they’re many kids who need families so that may be a good option for you!
Happy and positive thoughts. You attract what you think. The doctors didnt say you wont/cant have children, did they? It means theres a 1% chance you might still have a baby. Focus on the goodness of your marriage. Love yourself. Relax and chill out. Believe in miracles. Have faith it will happen. And just be happy and thankful while waitng for it. Besides, it does not make you less of a woman. God may be preparing you for something bigger.