My infant will only sleep when he is beign held: Advice?

I’m a first-time mom to a six-week-old baby boy, and over the last month, he’s been becoming increasingly more dependent on both his father and me for sleep. We almost always have to be holding him for him to fall asleep. No matter how gently we set him down, he wakes up and fusses, if not cries until one of us picks him up again. Yesterday we went the entire day where I could not set him down for more than 3 minutes without him full force crying, but then at one point overnight he slept for 5.5 hours straight in his bassinet, I’m assuming because he was exhausted. It’s becoming a frequent occurrence where I have to spend my entire day holding my baby. Have any other Mom’s out there experienced this? Is there a solution, or is it just something that comes with time? Advice much appreciated! Thank you!

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Try a swing if u have one if not highly recommended you get one

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My kids were like that until I got them a swing an then they would sleep

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I’d try a swaddle, and wrapping it a little tighter since your baby is so little still and doesn’t roll over yet. and I’d try a white noise machine.

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When putting him in the bassinet or a swing have something in there that smells like you or dad so he knows he is safe an comfortable

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It’s absolutely exhausting but yes it’s completely normal. Talk yourself into it being OK that you’re sitting and holding your baby. Other things have to wait! They are still brand new at 6 weeks old and all they know is they want to feel and smell their mama :blush:

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My 8 week old is the same way. I swaddle him a little tight and hold and rock him till i know he is out. Then I’ll place him in is swing so he’ll still feel the rocking motion.

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We used to get a little heating pad and put it on our daughter’s bassinet to warm up her bed, then take it off before we’d lay her down. We realized going from our warm arms to a cold bed would always wake her up! It was such a game changer and life saver!

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Swings and vibrating bouncers are a lifesaver.

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Only 6 weeks old? Hold him, use a carrier so it’s easier to get things done. You carried him 9mths so obviously he will still want to be held. A five hr stint of sleep at night is huge for that age as well, my 18mth old only just stopped hourly breast feeds through the night so I’d say he is being a normal six week old.

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3 of mine would only sleep on their tummy and I mean ONLY.

When he can hold his head up get a sit me chair, and if your doing dishes or something have him with you. Something like this. Then you can get stuff done and he’s near you. As for sleeping alone I’m sorry I don’t have any advice :pleading_face:

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I went through the same thing when my son was a baby. He’s 13 now… But it was rough for awhile. We realized eventually that he would also fall asleep in his swing when it would rock him side to side. So he spent alot of time sleeping in his swing because it was either that or one of us had to be holding him which wasn’t always doable. It wasn’t an ideal fix but it helped.

My youngest was like that until i took him to the chiropractor, night and day difference. He took two adjustments hasnt had to go back since :slight_smile:

It’s a growth spurt. It will pass hopefully. Same boat here, i swaddle then lay ler next to me and then move her to crib, but at least 30 mins until she’s deep asleep before moving.

Dont hold it all the time if your baby gets tired enough your baby will fall asleep by its self if you keep giving in then it will expect you to hold them all the time even when you have things you need to be doing just let your baby cry it’s self soothing teaches them that they can’t always have you hold them just because they cry teach your baby now that the world doesn’t revolve around them and that they can’t always have there way other wise they grow up being self entitled brats that need there asses beat

That’s what they do Mama, some infants need to be held rock the clock, as he gets older you’ll be have to leave him for longer time periods but he’s still needs to be held ever 10-15 minutes

My 5 month old is the same. My older daughter did it too. They eventually grow out of it… enjoy the cuddles! My 3 year old is now rambunctious and an independent “big girl”

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Totally normal. Youre in the 4th trimester. Your baby only knows you. He only knows your touch, warmth, smell. He’s too young to cry it out. Just do what he needs. You’re building a trustworthy bond right now, dont mess it up bc you’re exhausted. Being a parent is exhausting. Way more then ever expected.

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Swaddle.
It’s so okay for him to want you to fall asleep, just keep trying to put him down. Every time, snuggle to sleep and put him down. He will learn to feel more comfortable and confident on his own, it does take time.
Do what feels right, you’re doing great! :yellow_heart:

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Try swaddling him and also i know they say you cant spoil a new born but you can. Put him down when he gets sleepy . Let him go to sleep with out being rocked. It will take you alot of trial and error to get it to work,but you will be glad u did.

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It was only 6 weeks ago that he was being held by your womb. And in no time at all he’ll be batting away your snuggles.
Snuggle that baby. :heartpulse:

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So i may get ugly words for this. But i have back issues. So i never did the hold baby to sleep thing. I used the baby sleeping cues. And laid baby down. No fuss. No issues. My girls are 3 and 2 now. I have never held them to sleep… just a suggestion follow baby cues. Like rubbing eyes. Eyes getting heavy. Etc.

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That’s what they need

Some babies just have that need :woman_shrugging:t2: its exhausting. Its hard to get things done… but just remember: its only temporary! … definitely try a swing or vibrating bouncy seat. My 10yo would ONLY sleep in a swing when he was tiny.

that’s what infants do you and the daddy are the safe place for your child. my one year old son is like this sometimes he wants to be held. sometimes he wants to be independent and walk everywhere. just depends day and mood for him lol. i’m okay with it either way. he’s only little once. :blue_heart:

Get a wrap to be able to hold him and still get stuff done.

Get a baby sling so I can have him on you but u can still get stuff done. And as for the sleep stuff it takes time he’s so use to hearting ur heart beat that it scares him when he can’t heart one.

Try swaddling him and soothing music

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My son is 6w! Look into the 4th trimester it’ll really help you understand. Mine loves to be swaddled and sometimes I have to keep my hand on his belly. He’s bassinet is right next to our bed for that reason. His swing is a life saver. Get into the habit of sitting him down anytime he will let you. Stay strong MoMA these days, as exhausting as they are, they don’t last.

He’s a newborn. Try putting him in a swing. Give him a warm bath and bottle then bed. My daughter would only sleep swaddled in her bassinet next to us, then we moved her to a pack n play when she got too long for the bassinet. Now she’s in her crib. Try sound and light machines.

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It’s normal, and it will pass eventually. I would suggest having it worked out with your husband that you switch off and give each other breaks. It’s tiring, but it’s not really wrong. Babies just need to be near their parents. That’s why so many cultures just wear them.

High maintenance baby. Wrap him!!

Lay a shirt you have worn on the mattress, the smell could help the baby soothe without you there, when you need a break. But enjoy it while you can, mines 16 months and already could care less about cuddling, miss it already

Make sure he isn’t wet or hungry. Let him cry. I know from experience.

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completely normal for this age! I know it’s exhausting but this is considered the “4th trimester”… keep encouraging the bassinet but don’t be surprised that he feels safer in you or dad’s arms.

its good to let them cry some strengthens lungs

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Yes I have and the first months of life they rely on there parents for everything. You can’t spoil a new born. They need love and assurance

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Merlins Magic sleep suit

I have a now 5 month old daughter, I said the same thing to the pediatrician and said I’m worried I’m spoiling her and was told there is no spoiling a newborn they need that trust and security. In the early weeks I could barely put her down to go to the bathroom or eat something, eventually we invested in a fancy swing that she loved. It gets better, she will now lay and roll around and be entertained for longer periods of times BUT she still doesn’t take good naps unless she’s held. She will take short naps but has slept 10 hours straight for a while now at night. Everyone tells me be grateful she’s a great nighttime sleeper but I’m like ahh it’s hard to get things done without my hands free for naps!

I hold my daughter to sleep whenever she needs to… kids grow up so fast that some day you’d be crying to hold them and they wouldn’t let you…

For the advice, lie down with the baby when you put them down, a few minutes later move away… they wouldn’t wake up… the reason they wake up when you put them to be is that they suddenly lose that warmth and smell… laying down with them will let them know you are there until the are sound asleep…

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Still doing this with my almost 8 months old… I wear her and do everything with her in my arms … she sleeps with me too … dad holds her while I shower

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Try a swing or the car seat. You can’t hold him all day, every day.

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Put the baby down! Of course he will cry but you will never get any peace as long as you continue to hold him constantly! It is not being cruel…as long as baby is clean and fed and you know he is safe you have to let him cry…you are teaching him to be too dependent on you! He will come around!

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Baby wear during the day

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I had to stop holding bc my second born went from holding to walking to car rides those went up to an hour and to expensive… I swaddled got a small stuffy and would place it on his tummy when I laid him down he still felt cuddled… when you lay the baby down do it very almost painfully slowly and do not immediately remove you hands and arms just very very slowly slide them out and maintain touch if the baby starts crying try to soothe the child without picking up give kisses, gentle touches on the cheek or rub the sides and legs … eventually it will get easier and slowly work your way out … can take several attempts but you are teaching a new pattern … may also help to let the baby nap next to you on a bed being close but not holding and then sneak off … the longer you wait the worse it can be… I never held my first other than feeding time and just kept him chilling near me and he never had issue with sleep … my youngest got sick 24 hrs after coming home and needed constant attention which turned into a huge mess all the things I suggested is what I had to do our bedtime routine could last for hours bc I let it go on to long thinking he could grow out of it … eventually he went extreme to literally making himself vomit… no baby needs held that much… unless you want 100% dependent child who doesn’t want to ever do a thing for their self bc yes it starts from birth…

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Check for colic. Mine needed medication. You can’t continue, or you will burn out.

Try a swing, moby wrap so your hand are free, swaddling wraps they help

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You can’t spoil a baby. Contrary to popular myth, it’s impossible for parents to hold or respond to a baby too much, child development experts say. Infants need constant attention to give them the foundation to grow emotionally, physically and intellectually.

:arrow_up::arrow_up::arrow_up::arrow_up::arrow_up::arrow_up::arrow_up:

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Yep, went thru this with our daughter for the first 7 months of her life she was glued to me. Like I could never put her down. She slept in the crook of my arm or on my chest. She is two now and I still have to rock her to sleep and she won’t sleep by herself and I can’t leave her sight. But it doesn’t bother me. I’m a stay at home mom so I can sleep when she sleeps but I understand that’s not the reality for everyone They are only little for such a short time but that’s not to say its not difficult. .

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My 2nd daughter was like this. I got a carrier to free up my hands which helped soo much and honestly I ended up co-sleeping bc its the only way she would sleep. Maybe you could buy a dock-a-tot or something similar so he’s in bed with you but safe since he’s still so little.

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My last baby of 4 was like this. We were just too tired to fight it. We wore her around everywhere, and thankfully my older kids helped. I know you don’t have that option and you must be exhausted. Just try to focus on enjoying the closeness. If you really need to do something, put her somewhere safe and go do it. Crying won’t hurt her, promise. Then when you’re done, pick her up again. :heart: I know everyone will say this to you, and you’ll probably just say “I know” or roll your eyes… But enjoy it while it lasts. My youngest is now 5 going on 16. (the only girl) I have no more babies to smell and love. I wish I wouldn’t have been so annoyed at times that she wouldn’t let me set her down. :heart: Good luck momma.

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Try wrapping him tight in a blanket like swaddling when putting him down to sleep. I had to do it with my youngest until she was almost 2. Same symptoms of waking easily and not napping long also using some sort of white noise like a fan helped for my daughter.

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I wore baby throughout the day. And we bed shared at night. Everyone slept great. There’s a great group called biologically normal infant sleep I suggest you join
Also research the 4th trimester. Baby still has emotional needs not just physical ones.
He will only be this age once. Soak up all the cuddles.

Don’t listen to this mess of letting the baby “cry it out”…babies cry for a reason. Even if it’s just to be held. It does get better. My son was like this and he’s now 4 months and sleeps with me and in his crib.

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I have 2 sons who would not sleep in cribs until they were almost a yr and a half old. 1 had to be in his swing to sleep and if it turned off he screamed 1 wanted to be in the car so we strapped the seat to the dryer turned it on and let him fall asleep. Each baby is different on their wants and needs just bare with him

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Try swaddling, they like to feel snug

Enjoy the first 3-5months of holding them to sleep. Before u know it, they’ll be huge and u can’t hold anymore. My son is now 18months old and for the first 6months, he literally slept on my chest with myself propped up all night(I’m a super light sleeper). When he reached 10months, I was able to put him down, but stay close to him for when he reached out and now finally he falls asleep in my arms and i can put him in his crib to sleep or he falls asleep on his own in his crib

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Mine is 12 months and most days still can’t sleep without being rocked and held.

Omg soak it up. One day it won’t happen and you’ll miss it

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My son does this, hes 3 months. needs held to sleep all day but at night he’ll fall asleep on me and once I lay him down he’s good for the night! Just enjoy them cuddles

White noise is how I finally got mine to sleep when I was so exhausted and trying anything. It still works keeping her sleep and she’s a year old lol

You could try baby wearing. If you really need to do something you can just put him down for a bit and let him cry. Maybe try swaddling.

It’s normal, it’s exhausting but it’s normal. My daughter had this thing it wasn’t a swing it was a glider and she would sit in it for hours and sleep because it rocked her side to side. A vibrating bouncy seat was also amazing but by the time she was five months old she would finally sleep in her crib

Wear them and hold them

Swaddle new babies think they’re falling when you set them down the pressure from swaddling helps. Swaddle then hold him till he sleeps then try setting him down.

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Dependent ??? Seriously he’s been held by you since his entire existence !! Hold that baby ! Hold him all day if needed I did ! Once they start crawling and waking they don’t even want you anymore

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Advice my very good friend gave me: babies will not die from crying. That advice saved me. That stage passed after a few weeks but it was awful. One of the reasons I only had one child. I couldn’t deal with the crying and stress.

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Its perfectly normal to let them them cry if you need a break. There is also the cry it out method. But it all really depends on how you feel about the whole situation.

My 4th baby was/is like this. I’ve been told it is the 4th trimester. She is 3 months old now and starting to let me put her down more. She is actually sleeping in her swing as I type this and fell asleep on her playmat yesterday. Enjoy the time with him. I know it’s exhausting but it’s worth every second.

You’ve carried that baby boy for 9 months. He’s listened to your heartbeat. Your voice. The noice around you. And he felt safe. He is still needing this security from you. Keep him close. It comforts him.

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Same for my 10mo old… back is shot🤷

With all 3 of mine😂 He wants to feel secure and warmth from you.you can try different sleeping positions. My daughter did ok in her bassinet at first but hated it after a while.she wasnt a huge fan of her swing either. I would put her o the floor on blankets or middle of my bed using our boppy breast feeding pillow so it felt like she was being held. When she would start to wake up I would go lay next to her, put my hand on her,ect to get her back to sleep. My 2 boys did didn’t want anything to do with thier bassinet either. They did ok in the swing… I had a playpen with a changing table and bassinet attachments on top of it, and they both loved that bassinet. It was a softer hanging one and it worked great, and was the main spot I could get them to sleep on thier own when needed.just stay calm. Some days are easier then others, try different thing if you can, until you find what he likes

Baby wearing and breastfeeding and lots of snuggles. Trust me they will go through an independent phase when they start sitting up at 4-6 months. Just enjoy your time with a infant. It’s so easy. Lots of cuddles and kisses !!! The long nights will pay off mama.

Old trick my mom taught me! Take your shirt that u have worn throughout the day n lay the baby on it / swaddle bby with it. Its your sent that calms bby!! Worked like a charm for my 3 boys

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All part of motherhood. Invest in a good baby carrier.

Housework can wait. You’ll never get this time back.

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my son liked his butt being patted put him straight to sleep

Swaddling seems to help most babies

This is normal. Hold that poor baby. He’s still brand new.

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Enjoy it! My last baby slept in my arms for months it was uncomfortable some nights but the bond that boy and I have is irreplaceable :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::blue_heart: they are only little for a little while then you’ll miss it!

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You can spoil a baby… Hense the reason they cry when you put them down… Duh.

I never held mine constantly. I’d hold them to feed but to sleep I never held them. I’d put them in swing or in their cribs to self soothe.

Holding a baby constantly causes them to only want to be held… Thats common sense…

Why do you think in hospital nursery tgey are all in bassinet not in nurses arms all the time

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Try swaddling the baby. It’s still a fresh baby that was used to being bundled up in the womb. Baby may just be having a hard time adjusting to the new environment. Swaddling them helps keep them snuggled and bundled so you can wash bottles or just take some time to breath. Don’t feel bad about putting your little love down just make sure they’re comfortable. I’ve also filled a tube sock with rice to place on my baby to simulate the weight of an arm being wrapped around him

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All 3 of mine. And I held them all as long as they needed me too. Cause they will eventually sleep on their own, play without u, and u will miss it.

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It’s a security thing. He was tucked up all snug and warm inside you for 9 months and he’s still getting used to the world around him. New faces, new sounds, new feelings. Some days I held my baby boy all day if he wanted it. He’d sleep on a pillow snuggled up to me, wake up to feed and go back to sleep again. It doesn’t last forever and he will get more independent but right now he just wants those cuddles and to be close. My baby is now 4 months and would sleep in the moses basket at night but during the day he wasn’t having any of it! :joy: He’d sleep for 5 mins, sometimes slightly more and want to be held again. Maybe he might sleep in a bouncer chair or something angled where he’s sitting up? I think mine just liked the pillow as it was soft because he’s the same with the duvet on my bed now, easily falls asleep on it. We’re given all these guidelines about laying baby on their back, don’t use blankets, keep the mattress in just a sheet etc. That’s not as cosy as you :heart: sorry I don’t have any solutions as I’m still figuring it out with my baby haha!

6 months and under THEY NEED MAMA & DADDY. Do not let a 6 week old infant CIO as these people are saying !!! Feedings, clean diapers, and love on repeat . . .

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He’s only 6 weeks old. All he knows is that he’s safe and secure in your arms and that’s where he wants to be. It’s not creating a bad habit or bad sleeping habits. Definitely get a body-wearing thing so u can still do what u need to do and he can still have his need met. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Try white noise while he falls asleep and you holding him and have the white noise also playing in his room or near wherever it is he’ll be sleeping. It did us wonders! If you YouTube baby white noise you can find some that just play it on loop for like 10-12 hours

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Swaddle baby. That may help

You can NOT spoil a 6 week old baby and most babies prefer to be held. Read happiest baby on the block, swaddle, wear baby, sleep with them if you like :heart: babies don’t keep

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That’s normal. It’s called the 4th trimester. You are all he has known for 9 months. Of course he wants to be held and be close. There will be a time you wish you had these moments back.

It’s normal get a baby carrier so you can still use your hands

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This is pretty normal still when they are that young. He’s used to being tight up in a ball. Try a swaddle on him. You can even sleep with the swaddle or keep it on you for a few hours so the swaddle will smell like you. But at 6weeks he’s still getting used to his new world and just wants some comfort.

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My son was the same way for the first 6-ish months. Now he’s 16 months and doesn’t want anything to do with snuggling. I wish I could go back and get those baby snuggles, even with the sleep deprivation while working a full time job. It won’t last forever. Baby is making a huge transition, he just spent the last 9 months all bundled and safe in your belly, and this is literally a whole new world for him.

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Normal, also hold them while they want u to , they grow up fast !

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Sweet Jesus. These comments are crazy.
My favorite :roll_eyes:
“He is learning to be dependent on you” HE IS 6 WEEKS OLD. HE IS DEPENDENT ON YOU.
Try baby wearing or swaddling I feel like 6 weeks is way too young for CIO

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Put a hot water bottle in his cot whip it out just b4 u put him down :heart_eyes: i had to do this with my daughter :purple_heart::blue_heart:

My baby girl was the same way! It is exhausting and sometimes frustrating to hold them all the time but it’s precious time you don’t get back and now my 14 month old baby girl sleeps in her own room throughout the night no problem! Do what is best for you and your baby!

Get a comfy chair an plenty of cushions and try to enjoy this as much as possible (I know it’s hard and you’re exhausted) my son would only fall asleep when he was being held until he was about 6 months then just sort of grew out of I suppose.
He is 7 and half and is really independent so it wont spoil him or make him unable to do anything independently later in life.
You’re doing everything right and dont doubt yourself or your gut when it comes to your baby.
You’re the mum and you know best!

Mine slept in his swing at that age with no problem