Christmas morning the last 8 years me and my fiance always go to his mother’s house for breakfast to see the family. It’s tradition and I’ve accepted it even though we have to wake up early and drive over with the kids. This year is looking different since my sister is coming home she hasn’t been home in 4 years to see my parents or my family. We are so excited trying to make everything perfect for her arrival , my mom’s only Christmas wish is coming true both her girls home for the holiday. We’ll my mother inlaw is furious we won’t be spending Christmas morning their as we will be 2 1/2 hours away celebrating with my family for the first time years ! We called and tried to reason but she screamed & hung up then started texting match. This is one year my family will be home for Christmas all together , not sure why my fiance side doesn’t understand. I even tried saying we can come days prior the Friday before Christmas and thay wasn’t good enough. I really am sick of being the bigger person . What would yall do ?
The second someone starts screaming at me, I quit considering their feelings and just do whatever I want. 
Too bad so sad, maybe next time don’t throw a tantrum, MIL.
I also had an absolute monster MIL like this. I had to go over for every holiday and could never spend any holidays with my family. My ex always sided with his mom. There was no winning.
Hopefully your husband is siding with you and has your back. If your MIL wants to go crazy about it, let her. Just ignore her and enjoy your Christmas with your family. It will be so special for you all! Don’t let her ruin your day. 
I would tell her that it’s your mother’s turn and that she is welcome to come along .
She sounds extremely toxic. Whatever you do, do not give into this woman, because then she will continue to act like this to get her way just like a toddler. Hold your ground! see your family and enjoy Xmas. If she wants to act like a little baby, then that is on her. You are not responsible for her feelings. She is a grown adult. It sounds like she’s used to getting her way and needs a wake up call. 
As a child that went to their grandparents every Christmas, waking up opening up presents and then rushing there, was never fun. Your family is together for the first time in years, is more important. Ignore her, and have a good Christmas with your family.
Be with your family. If she can’t understand that, it’s her problem not yours. Don’t feel guilty, your family matters also.
Most families take turns, so she should really feel lucky y’all spent 8 years in a row going to her house. If she wants to act like this, I’d start going to your parents house every other Christmas.
Tell her to get over it! MILs get on my nerves when they mostly don’t even like their DILs. Furthermore she’s a bully and I wldnt go next year either. I don’t like her and she definitely wldnt like me ugh
I say enjoy your Family and put MIL on the back burner until she grows up. May be too late for that. Teach her a lesson and let her ponder on it for a year. Good Luck
Ignore her bs and enjoy your Christmas with your family. Nothing to feel guilty for so don’t let her crazy behaviour bother you any longer especially when you did try to meet in the middle and go see her earlier in the week.
Awe, so happy for your mom. Don’t let this discourage you. Merry Christmas and prayers for your sister for a safe trip.
Go spend Christmas morning with your family. Let her be mad! And if she wants to continue to act a fool I wouldn’t go over for Christmas Eve or later Christmas day! Matter of fact you should spend the whole day with your family. I know it sucks for your MIL that you won’t be there with your husband’s family Christmas morning but that’s what happens when you get married. You gotta take turns with family. No need for her to scream & act a fool. Sounds like shes a real hoot! LOL Good luck with that! Also don’t feel bad about it either. Go enjoy your family! Take lots of pictures!! Merry Christmas!
It’s the first time in year’s you are having christmas with all your family ,that’s special you enjoy your christmas with them,hope hubby is on your side you MIL will get over it.merey christmas to you and your family x
I mean if it’s something you’ve done all this time why can’t you celebrate with your sister Christmas Eve or the day after Christmas? Why ON Christmas if she’s coming to you? Plus won’t you be spending time with her the days leading up to and after? Since she’s coming to you? Had to pick Christmas Day though. Ok I see where your MIL is upset. Why don’t you celebrate with your family when your sister isn’t in town? So much confusion. NOW they want to celebrate? Weird af to me. Comments are not vibing either.
Go home and why isn’t your hubby speaking up ??? You have been over there every year and your an adult let his mother think about how selfish she is gosh !!! Go home and happy holidays!!! I sure would make my mom super happy for once
GO To Your Family. That’s what being married is about. Compromise. She needs to realize you have a family that is important as well. She is not the center of the world. I hope your man understands and is not pressuring you to do as she says. I always tried to do a Christmas with his and mine every other year. You need to do that. That way it’s even. His family takes the odd number years and yours the even. It also teaches your children everyone matters in each side. If she still harasses you …stop answering texts and calls from her. She just wants to be in control of him and you. show her she’s not by not answering her calls and texts . God bless. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Completely ignore her. Don’t play into the drama. Enjoy Christmas with your family.
Well, MIL has two choices. She can either accept it and get over it, or she can become bitter and overbearing resulting in pushing you all away. Either way, the choice on your end has been made. She’s just gonna have to decide what way she’s gonna live with it. It’s out of your hands and not your problem. Just let it go. Whatever happens is gonna happen. There’s no use in letting it cloud spending the holiday with your side. I’m sure YOUR mom didn’t throw a fit the last 4 years when you weren’t home for Christmas. So I think it’s entirely reasonable and understandable that you don’t go to MIL’S for Christmas. She’s not entitled to your holiday time, nor is she allowed to dictate who with and where you choose to spend it. I wouldn’t apologize for it either.
She’s not your mum leave your partner to deal with her! If she can’t understand she never will
The year we were allowed to see others except Christmas Day we chose to see my mum over his partly because we saw her daily anyway so could see her a different day
She didn’t understand mostly as he wasn’t honest with her at the time
However we discussed it and decided together it was best way to do it
I would let her be a child and I would take my kids to your families house and enjoy the holiday 
If she wants to miss out completely that’s her choice.
I would ask hubby (if he agrees to your parents) to explain to his family that you are spending Christmas with your folks. And then maybe it’s time to go every other year to each one. If they don’t understand, they are being selfish. They’ve had 8 years already.
I’d go to your family then next year stay home and let your kids enjoy their Xmas morning and playing with their presents!
The moment she would have started acting like an entitled 3 year old, the conversation would have been over and what she wanted would be taken completely out of the equation. Your family matters just as much as theirs. Go and enjoy time with them
This is the first time in years that your whole family will be together on Christmas. Your mother in law can get over it. Go be with your family.
Go be with your family. My mother in law wouldn’t even think to try that with me. Once you let em slide, they think they can ice skate. Stand firm in your decision and screw her
You go to your parents. At the end of the day, as long as your fiancé supports you then his family’s opinions don’t matter. Especially when you have tried to compromise. Please go see your sister, and make your mama happy!
Tell her you guys have spent the last 8 with her your asking for 1, she will either get over it or she won’t but don’t give in to her. I’m having this issue with my own mother she throws a fit everytime we don’t show up when I tell her like hey we want to do our own thing. We are more then happy to get together for an hour or two Christmas Eve or the day after and exchange gifts but we want Christmas to just lay around the house and enjoy Christmas and watch our kid enjoy what he got he is almost grown and every year we have had 5 or six different places to go and with we have slowly quit going to certain places or the people have passed away so we go to no in laws because my fil passed Dec last year and my mil lives in a group home. My grandma passed 2 years ago at the age of 95 so that just leaves my mom maybe we are being selfish but we just want time to our selfs
We ALWAYS stay home for Christmas morning! Christmas eve we do all the running.
“I’m sorry you feel that way.” Click. Repeat as many times as necessary. After 5 times. “we’ve talked about this.” Click.
Say I’m sorry but I’m spending it with my family and if she don’t like it oh well and I would ignore her and go spend time with your side cherish all the time you can with your parents and family cause time sure isn’t promised I lost my mom last year after Christmas so you do what you want she will be ok cause if she loves you will will understand
Just never mind. She’s a grown adult she’ll get over it. Not your problem to deal with.
I would not put up with that. If an adult can’t act like one girl don’t entertain it. Give them a alternative and they can take it or leave it. Simple as that.
Stick with your decision, and I would take turns one year my family, the next his family!
Live your life with what makes you happy
Be with your family she’s grown
Being the bigger person is really only tolerating disrespect.
GO! Stop being the bigger person for one day and GO! I would. Don’t pay them no mind when they start their keyboard wars, don’t feed into that drama. If they want to talk, then they can talk to you but if they are gonna scream at you, then you need to ignore them and keep them away until they can learn to be the bigger person but you’re not disrespecting anyone by making a decision that is best for your side of the family. Your MIL should respect that. Period. End of discussion, don’t fan the flames by texting back or anything, just go.
Hold your ground. Tell her calmly that her behavior is unacceptable… be firm… like she’s a child and ignore her tantrum
Talk to boyfriend and let him settle his family
Join your family and mil can get over it.
She will get over it…and if she doesn’t…well that shows you what kind of person she is 
don’t skip out on seeing your family, don’t let her ruin that for you all!
Let the child have her tantrum, you deserve to have a happy Christmas with your family!
Tell your mil to suck it up buttercup I’m going to see my family this year.
Go be with your family your mil will get over it
The mistake you’re making is giving her an explanation. Your family hasn’t been together for 4 years for Christmas. She should understand and move on. If she doesn’t, that’s on her. Go and enjoy your sister.
Something I have learned across the way is to make people admit what they are asking right as the conversation is happening.
“I want to make sure I understand, you are mad that for the first time in 8 years I am spending Christmas with my family? Why do you feel like me and my family don’t deserve that?”
See your family. MIL can get over it.
Wow she’s selfish. Enjoy the holiday with your family.
Go to your families for a change. Mother in-law seems a bit unreasonable
Tell her sorry but you haven’t had your family together like this in Years. Its one year it aont kill her. If hubby decides with her let him Go and say sorry but my family is important too.
you shouldnt even have to ask this question, you spend the holidays with your family, you shouldnt have to explain yourself to anyone, i hope you have a wonderful christmas 
Go to your moms house and celebrate with your family. Block the toxic mother in law also she’s drama
I would suggest you keep your phone off Christmas day as well so she doesn’t do another texting match or childish behavior to ruin the day for you. Don’t give in. I’m glad your husband is on your side
Tell her to butt out.
She will have to accept it.
Nope. Tell them you won’t be there then mute their calls and text.
It’s Christmas Day you don’t want to spend the day driving around with cranky, tired, over stimulated kids.
I would NEVER go there again…
Sounds like a toxic narcissist of a mil and I wouldn’t feed into the bull shit
Tell her that her options are to see you at another time (ie Christmas Eve, December 26 etc) or not at all
So what be with your family she’s being selfish
Ignore.
Do what I want.
To bad for her.
I would do nothing lol she’s a grown ass woman, she’ll get over it. Go enjoy your time with your family
Not go and stick to your plans.
Do your own Xmas your way
Stay home with your family. You are not able to reason with mil. At this point, “no” is a full sentence.
I’m going to be nice but awww helllll naw🙄
Families should take turns.
Quit responding, send one last text saying what you have to say and end the conversation
I would alternate years between the grandparents
Kinda feel bad you’re only going to your family’s because of your sister and not as a regular thing
I wouldn’t be the bigger person.
Go be with your family. MIL can get over herself. Sharing holidays is something most families do.
Go see your family and ignore her tantrum.
Id tell her to get over it 
it isnt just about her.
You go to your family, he can go to his. Everyone wins and no one is stuck with family they don’t want to be with.
I totally feel ya about always being the bigger person. It gets old. Do you and don’t worry about your MIL!!
Your family deserves to see their girls too. It’s not just your MIL Go to your parents house and visit with your sister
Enjoy Christmas with your sister and mother. You and this guy aren’t even married. So technically she is not your MIL.
Ur mil is definitely the a hole here go enjoy time with ur family especially since it’s been that long enjoy ur holiday u can’t say u didn’t try
Yeah I did this, was never allowed to go to my families holidays. Now circumstances have changed and we get to see my family and it’s great. They’ll get over it or they won’t, but my biggest advice is to start immediately splitting the holidays. If your in laws give you trouble simply answer “we are splitting the holidays with both families, please have a merry Christmas and we will see you next year. If you’d like to celebrate with us on another day, please let us know when you’re free.” Don’t say anything else. Repeat that over and over again.
Start a new tradition where you go to their home every other year. On alternate years you go to your parent’s or stay home with your family. Nobody gets to dictate your family’s schedule but you & your fiance.
Your MIL is being childish and what I’d do is send my fiancé to his mothers and Take my kids and myself to my families home for Christmas if he isn’t going to be there for you.
My mother in law did Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. My family always just celebrated Christmas Day so we did Christmas Eve at his moms and Christmas Day at my family. I know she probably didn’t like it but It seemed like Christmas Eve was the bigger deal they even opened presents on Christmas Eve, so I thought that made more sense.
Too f’ing bad… Enjoy the holiday with your family and don’t give her a second thought. As soon as we had kids we made it clear that we would not travel on Christmas day, period. If grand parents wanted to see the kids on Christmas morning, they were welcome to come to us. For 20 years my inlaws did just that, alternating between us and my brother-in-law’s house. Our Christmas mornings were always magical 
Stand your ground, and Merry Christmas!
Spend it with your family and then tell your guy that since his mother wants to be toxic about having ONE Christmas with your family after so many years with hers that the new tradition will be Christmas with your guy, kids, and yourself, Christmas Eve with your family and she can see y’all day after Christmas IF she corrects herself. See how fast that tune changes when you put your foot down and DO NOT be swayed.
Now you’ve seen your MIL’s TRUE Colors! It’s all about what SHE wants. If she cannot compromise, then create your own “tradition” and invite her over to your house for the next Christmas morning. You do have kids you’re dragging around!
If she wants to be immature and not be understanding then I’d just not go there at all for holidays if she doesn’t want to understand that you have family gatherings sometimes too…as someone who lost her family members that used to gather together and now we just stay home and do our own thing for holidays. We don’t always make it to my in-laws but they only came here once for our daughter’s birthday party.
My kids/grandkids have in-laws & their immediate family/children with whom to celebrate (they usually include me), so we split our times throughout Christmas week & finally on the 26th of December, we All get together for dinner to celebrate.
You are right, go hang out with your family for once, hopefully it’s works out for next year… if not then start your own traditions 
I would tell her to F off
No. Really.
Put her on notice
You are going to spend Christmas with your family.
You’ve offered compromises… which she has not only declined but has continued to act like a spoiled petulant child having a temper tantrum.
It’s toxic and completely unacceptable.
If she continues you will cut her (and anyone else participating) off.
I’ve been married 18 years. My MIL has treated me like a second class citizen from day 1. I finally put my foot down after Christmas at her house last year. I said never again and I meant it. My husband agrees. He took the kids this year because they wanted to go but I had a peaceful day at home. My advice is don’t wait 18 years to set boundaries. She sounds a lot like me MIL and she will never make concessions for you. Go be with your family. Enjoy your visit and time with your sister. Nothing you can do is going to make your MIL change. This is just who she is. Accept that and redefine the relationship with your boundaries.
Enjoy not having to go all over for once in a long time and enjoy your sister and family!! Remind her of all the other Christmas mornings you’ve shared and all the additional Christmas’s to come! No matter what, don’t let the momentarily bitterness ruin your Christmas!🫶🏽
My own mother threw a monster tantrum over Xmas 8 years ago. I’ve not spoken to her since
Go to your family. Set your limits and keep them otherwise you will never have any peace. And your mom deserves this year with all of you. Never know what the next one will bring. Enjoy and have a great time!
Only a Grinch wouldn’t understand how important this Christmas is with amd to your family Enjoy the festivities, with your family!
Let her be pissed go enjoy Christmas with your family. She will get over it, and oh well if she doesn’t. 
Make sure you get lots of family photos!!
Invite them to your parents after all your all family unite don’t divide memories are important trust me I lost my dad November 10th and would give anything for another day with him invite your in-laws to your parents Christmas celebration if they decline it is then on them not you hugs Merry Christmas enjoy every minute with your family and if the others choose not to come you tried to make everyone happy
Stop being the bigger person. You and your family doesn’t have to go by her traditions and if she doesn’t like it or agree with it then she can F off🤷 She seems to think whatever she says, goes and I would not let her think that’s how it is. At this point just don’t even worry about breakfast for Christmas with her, even days before since she wants to act like a child.
You just say to hell with her. Simple as that! My Mom organizes Christmas and thanksgiving at her house around my sister and I so that we can see everyone for the holidays because it should not matter which damn day it is.
Don’t worry about it and enjoy your time with your family. She can silk and if she continues her bad behavior then maybe stop giving in to her demands and do what you really want with your own kids. Do you guys enjoy getting up early and rushing through your own Xmas just to keep MIL happy?
Go to your family
And use this as a break away from being obligated to GO anywhere Christmas am.
You should be home with your kids and husband enjoying the gifts and being together.
Not forced to go anywhere
Go see your family. If your husband wants to go to his mom’s house then he can go. You two can have your own Christmas that way too. I do that. If my father comes up we go see him, if my man doesn’t want to go with me he goes to his mom’s house. I wouldn’t give her no satisfaction at all. You need to go see your family for once. Sorry not sorry how I look at it.