My MIL wants to take my kids out of town but it makes me uncomfortable: Thoughts?

Can you post please?? so just need some opinions. I’m married, but my husband no longer in the picture. He went to prison and will be there for a very long time. He’s an only child. Well, my mother in law scares me with how fake she seems to be. She and my husband’s older kids are a mom who is very close. I’ve always respected her(my mother n law) until this past year. She’s done some shady shit to me. That’s including stuff involving the other mom. Anyways recently, we got into it over her wanting to take 2 of my kids out of town. At the same time as my husband’s older kids and where the other mom is. I told her no, I wasnt.comfortable with it. I just feel like what the both done to me in the past and her taking my kids now just isn’t sitting well with me. Well, she blew up and defended the other mom. The other mom and I have had some words this past year, and it wasn’t good. So Isk I just feel like she could be mean to my kids, and my mother n law would allow it. Idk I honestly just would rather have nothing to do with all of them. Need opinions…help, please.

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No is a complete sentence.

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I wouldn’t allow it, either.

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i wouldnt allow my kids to go

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Regardless of any back story, if you’re uncomfortable with it, you can say no with no explanation.

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I wouldnt allow it all. And you do not need to keep ties with these people cut them out of your life.

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YOU are the mom. If you aren’t comfortable with it then don’t allow it.

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Go by your momma gut! If your gut says no then go with that! Only you know what is best for your children!

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You’re kids your choice! Always trust your gut momma :heart:

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Always trust ur mom gut if it feels off it probably is…

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No is the only answer you need to give.

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If your gut is saying not to then you are their mother and what you says goes simple… x

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Don’t do it if you’re not comfortable with plain and simple

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As the children’s mother of you are not comfortable with it then I would not allow them to go. She doesn’t have to like it one bit.

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Why are you even asking this question? They are your children not hers, it’s your choice

Say no just no, it’s not up to her she can fuck off

You have no obligation to even let her see them much less take them out of town.

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You’re their mom. If you don’t like it, don’t do it.

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I’m usually the odd man out. But I’m even saying no. The end.

If in doubt, don’t do it!! I wouldn’t be letting my kids go with anyone if I had doubts about the way in which they would be treated. Your the mum, so if there’s even one​:point_up: doubt in your head, don’t let them go :+1:

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I wouldn’t let her take them out of town. If she has disrespected you and you don’t feel comfortable, then absolutely not! A Grandparent has no rights anyway. She can visit them WHEN she’s being courteous to you and if you allow her to. I don’t even like my kids going far with my husband. Not because he isn’t trustworthy or a good driver, but because I hate them being away from me for too long in case something did happen. I’d regret it deeply if I weren’t there with them. Tell her no. You don’t have to let her take them. They are your kids!

Those are your kids you say no it’s no

Mother’s intuition! Trust it!

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Just say no and leave it at that no explanation nothing… if ur uncomfortable theres a reason why something is telling you that… no is no…

Your kids, your rules. If you dont feel comfortable, follow your gut & stand your ground

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It’s our job as moms to protect our kids and if something is telling you not to allow it then trust it! Us moms have instincts that are usually not wrong when it comes to our babies! You owe nobody any explanation!

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They are your children. Trust your gut. You don’t need to explain anything to her, no is the only answer she needs.

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Your kids, your decision. Anyone who can disrespect you, has no business being with your kids. Don’t be made to feel guilty for doing what your gut is telling you is right. Say no, and remember you DO NOT have to explain yourself. The answer is just flat out no. Your reasons aren’t her or anyone else’s business

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Say no, just be careful if you’re in a state that allows grandparents rights that she doesn’t try to gain some type of rights to them

No is no. You have all rights to your children. She has none.

Go with your gut. They’re your kids. Never let them go somewhere with people who you don’t trust 100% family or not. I’m very selective and I do not apologize for it.

No, I would not let her take them. If anything ever happened to them after you let them go, you would never forgive yourself. Just ignore her and the OTHER mother. That’s the best you can do as a Mom. Protect your children!

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Your kids, your say! I would not let them go… Trust your gut mama!

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Suggest you and your children move far away from all of them!

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You don’t need advice. You know what to do. You are their mother. You follow your hut and protect your kids. If mil doesn’t like it. Too bad. They are your kids. Not hers. Trust your gut
Always.

Nobody takes my kids out of town without me…I won’t have a large distance between us

Don’t let her take them momma. ALWAYS follow your gut and remember that is better to have a pissed off MIL than having to regret after something happens to your kids.

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I wouldn’t let her take the children. Fuck that shit ! Keep your kid’s . If you have a bad feeling about it , listen tk your gut .

Nope. I wouldnt. Any mother in law who would do shady things to her son’s wife is just a no.

Simple if your not ok with it they don’t go the mil has no rights they are your kids i wouldnt let them go

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follow your instincts momma!

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Always go with your gut

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Say no if you’re uncomfortable. Your kids, your decision. You don’t have to offer any reason or explanation

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Tell her. You can spend with My kids, with me present. Period. End of story.

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Think it’s sad as there all siblings at the end of the day

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You have no obligation to them. If you are uncomfortable, don’t do it. Your kids come first!

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You’re the mom. Just say no and be done

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Nope always trust your gut instinct

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No reason to let her, they aren’t her kids and with dad in jail, you dont have to have any contact with them, she has no say over them, id move away from them and cease all contact,

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Dont do it follow your instincts.

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Nope. Just nope. That’s the wonderful thing about being a parent. They are your kids and if you don’t feel comfortable, you don’t owe anyone any explanation.

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Don’t do it!!! Follow your instincts and stand your ground.

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does she have visiting rights-you do not have to do anything that would harm the kids-she could take them off and you not find them for 6 months or just refuse to bring them back, would have to go to court to get them back-she didn’t do too good raising her own son or he would not be in jail

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You are correct and don’t need a second opinion though thank you. Don’t let guilt or shaming change your mind. You are protecting your kids and yourself, very wise. Perhaps sometime you can all do a group activity.

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Do not do it! You would be so worried and stressed the whole time! Not worth losing your peace over! I wouldn’t let her take them!

Trust your gut, don’t even give her the pleasure of getting you all riled up over it. No means no end of discussion.

If your gut says no follow it i have dealt with a similar situation. I say no to a lot now and it doesn’t bother me anymore I use to think I owed that side of the family something cause they are blood but really I don’t trust them and my children really aren’t comfortable. We occasionally spend time together and my MIL always pushes to have them over without me and I always say no.

Nope don’t let her can’t be good

Nope. Don’t let your babies go. Not getting good vibes from the situation at all.

You don’t even have to associate with this woman.

Her reaction says it all, if u not comfortable that’s what u go with.

Trust your instincts momma. They don’t lie

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If she doesn’t get them on a regular basis why would she want to take them out of town? She would have to get them in town and they tell me how the visit went a few times then I would make a decision from that. Sounds like a for show kinda thing or guilt trip. Does your kids want to go? How old are your kids? all of this plays a part. If you say no. It’s No. Daddy gave up his say the day he went behind bars. I think some grandmas really care and then there are those who get the grands just because of guilt. You should know.

No listen to your gut

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I would not let her take them out of town. Nope never gonna happen. End of story. Your kids, your choice. He made his bed and now you have 100% decision making.

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Trust your motherly intuition! If you wouldn’t trust them with your life then you shouldn’t trust them with your children’s because your children are your life!

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They are your kids. Not the mother in laws. Go with your gut. Real Momma’s keep their kids safe. You got this.

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I wouldn’t let them go. Even if they’re not mean they sound like people who would talk badly about you in front of your kids. They don’t need all that stress. I have siblings I didn’t spend time with growing up and i don’t know them now. Your kids will be fine.

Don’t let her take them

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Don’t do it, trust your gut feeling. Sounds sketchy.

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Your kids your rules …

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Nope. Listen to your gut. You don’t have to feel guilty about anything here. Those are YOUR kids. If you feel something’s off, I wouldn’t send them.

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Oh no way. Don’t let her take them anywhere. If anything, I’d see about moving, getting a different job, different number, different schools, different everything. Block her on social media. Cut her out of your life immediately. It sounds like some sort of attempted kidnap situation. Get out while you can. And never talk to her again

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Trust your gut, mama. Don’t send them with her.

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Hell to the no don’t let ur kids go

Uncomfortable? Say no. The end.

Do what your comfortable with and don’t feel bad about it!!
I wouldn’t send my kids with them!!

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Your kids your rules stand your ground

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Don’t listen to grandparent rights or any other threats. If you can’t tell her to f.o. for some reason, day, “I already planned something with my family! What a shame!” Use the time to find a home in any of the other 50 states where they aren’t. She might be setting you up. Whoever shows up at the welfare office with kids can become payer of benefits. All she has to do is accuse you of something horrible, cry to a sympathetic judge, express fear of you, and you’ll be up there with hubby. Then she’s got guaranteed income until the youngest turns 18. By then your kids will be experts at babysitting her next generation of victims, and they will hate you because of all the lies she has told them about you.

Trust that momma gut!!!

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HELL NO, keep your babies safe from all. Trust your momma instincts, we have them for a reason.

If you don’t feel comfortable with it then don’t do it. But if she’s going to keep them safe and have fun then I would let them go

Keep your kids away from those toxic women.

They’re your kids! Don’t let her back you into a corner.

Grandparents have no rights so the decision is completely yours. If the grandparent isn’t a threat please don’t remove her from your kid’s lives as grandparents are so important. But nothing say’s you have to let you’re kid’s go away with her. I’d sit her down and tell her that as long as she plays you against the other ex the kid’s will not be allowed to go. If she does the right thing maybe in the future. Then it’s completely up to her to do the right thing. If she doesn’t then it’s nobodies fault but her own. But as a grandma it’s really hurtful when you lose out on grandkids because someone’s relationship didn’t work out.

If you are not comfortable with this simply tell her no. Also tell her you would prefer her to stay away. Does she see a lot of her sons ex?? If so tell her she would be more welcome there than she is at your home. Don’t let anyone disrespect you or your children. If you sense something is off it probably is. Good luck

I wouldn’t let her either. She can’t just come in and decide to be gma when it works for her unless there’s a real reason, but most the time there isn’t one. If she isn’t with them regularly don’t let her take them. You are not obligated. Family can be toxic too. I agree with jeanne it seems shady to me that’d she want to take them out of town all the sudden and could be a kidnapping attempt or a way to get back at you for her sons prison time. My daughters gpa always blamed my exs prison time on me because he was an abusive drug addicted alcoholic and would be in jail for various things and bc I was pregnant it was my “fault” and my job to get him out. Ha I left 3 years ago cut them all off except her great gma bc she’s the only one who encouraged an dhelped me leave. I don’t regret cutting them out in any way shape or form. 3 years I made the best decisions of my life and put my daughter first!
You’re a mum they’re your kids, your MIL has no say over them. Trust your instincts I did and haven’t looked back since! Good luck hun!

Sick with your gut! They are your kids! No means no!

Why would your mil think it would be ok to bring your kids to your hubby’s ex especially if you dont get along? Dont let them go, something is not right with that!

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Your kids. If you dont want her take them tell her to back tf off :neutral_face:

No is no. Those are your kids. End of story. Let them feel however they want, that’s not your business. What is your business is your kids. You dont feel comfortable, then that’s it. It’s not up for discussion.

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Don’t second guess yourself! If you’re not comfortable with it, then it’s a no. You don’t need to feel bad about it.

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No, if you aren’t comfortable, go with your gut!!!

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Trust you mama intuition! Do not let your kids go and maybe even look into moving away from them if possible

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Trust ur gut. They r ur children.

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No, keep your kids with you drive them yourself to where ever… MIL tried to get me to put my son on a bus to their place. I said I would bring him, I was told no place for me stay there. Said I would get a motel room there. Well it turned out he didn’t go cause all I had was a Post Office #. So stand firm…NO…

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They’re YOUR kids, if you do not want them to go then say NO!!! I wouldn’t allow it.

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Uhhh if you feel uncomfortable don’t let YOUR children go with HER :thinking:

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Listen to your instincts

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Those are YOUR kids. It’s your responsibility to do what’s best for them. If you have any reason to think someone wouldn’t be good to them then keep that person away.