But is the child in a unhealthy weight??
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We tell my son he’s chunky or whatever BUT we have made sure to tell him over and over again that he’s PERFECT and just because you got more fat then someone else doesn’t make you any less beautiful!! That he is handsome and big is okay!!
I don’t want to lie to him and tell him he’s not chunky/fat because he is definitely bigger the most children (he’s 5 and weighs 72 lbs) BUT I want him to know that being bigger does NOT make you ugly on the slightest bit
I understand where grandma is coming from but also a bitch thing of her to not have a conversation with you on her thoughts. You don’t have to accept her opinion. I would show your daughter pictures of every body type and explain everyone is beautiful and not everyone is the same size.
All I can say is I wish I would’ve had parents that taught me to eat healthy I’ve been overweight all my life and have suffered traumatically…. I have a feeling your mother didn’t mean any harm
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Ok my x did that to my daughter and she wasnt far but she became so concerned about her weight she would be exercising in her room if she ate a cookie. She may have had goid intentions but saying your fat to a 6 year old only looks for trouble (my daught was underweight when my x thought to put her down) there are ways to go about a healthy eating habit but putting down is NOT one of them. Hope she is ok
First maybe just tell the daughter maybe gma meant big as in taller older and she needs to start eating better not that she is getting fat
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Too bad she didn’t just talk to her about healthier eating & left the insult out of it.
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Tell grandma it is not her place to say about your childs dietary needs, that’s parents job, very sad, poor kid, my granddaughter has always had issues with her weight, self conscious about it right into adulthood, it was ok to maybe offer a healthier choice, but never to make her feel bad about herself, how could a grandmother do that 
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I’d have a talk with good ole Mom and tell her that she is never to make any comments on your child weight again. If she does that will be the last time she sees her. Little girls have it hard enough living up to social scrutiny the way it is, she needs support from family not criticism.
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Oh hell no! No one tells my child they are big or fat or anything that equates that. Teaching kids to eat healthy is one thing but you emphasize it’s for their health not their weight. My sister and I both had eating disorders growing up because of how family members spoke just about themselves and their weight. My dad would criticize my sisters and my moms weight all the time as well. It leads to even worse eating habits. If she’s worried or the doctor is worried emphasize healthy eating in a healthy way and that’s by letting them know it’s good for them not because of how “big” they are getting!
I would sit your mother down, when your daughter is not there, and talk to her calmly. Let her know how it made you feel and now what your daughter is feeling and projecting.
Ask her to encourage your daughter to eat the apple first and then if she is still hungry, maybe them she can have the cookie??
For christ sakes the child is only 6!!
My mother did that to me as well while I was growing up, I hated it. I was a chunky kid. I still have issues with food to thia day and Mt mother still harpes on me about my weight. Best of luck
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Well is she fat or not? Sometimes the truth hurt and what is wrong with a apple?
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Find another option.
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My mother did the same to me constantly even when i wasnt fat. She’s no longer in my life or my children’s lives.
Even if the child is an unhealthy weight, you do not tell them, you just change their diet and encourage healthy foods. YOU DO NOT TELL A CHILD THEY ARE FAT.
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If i say what i think i will be in fb jail …
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No one says that to my child I had a grandma who said mean things like that I will not tolerate it.
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I’d smack her in her freaking mouth honestly.
One of the little girls in the neighborhood makes my daughter feel fat. Every time she spends any time around her she’ll say things like I’m gonna draw myself on this some swing right here and then she’ll patter stomach and say but I’m not gonna draw this. She won’t tell me who actually calls her fat but somebody does. She’s five. She’s 50 inches tall. She wears a 1012. Because of that height. She’s not fat and it just pisses me off that at five she’s got to worry about that. I constantly Tell her she’s smart and beautiful and amazing and I never comment on her weight even when I’m trying to counter act someone calling her fat because I’m not gonna place all her value on that for her especially at five
Tell your daughter to stand up for herself. She’s only 6. Why does being fat matter right now. She needs to be a kid. Wow.
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Is she fat or obese ? It’s for her own well being. You know what heart disease at least your mom cares
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Yes the grandma needs to be put in place… 
Learn how to communicate if you don’t like something perhaps you should have a one on one conversation with your mother and tell her that you perhaps or that you wish she would never body shame your daughter again… Also if someone is watching your child perhaps you should provide the snacks… Also have a chat like a normal person with your daughter telling her sometimes grandma’s making mistakes… And perhaps your mom can sit down and talk with her to…, It’s all common sense… If you’re disappointed in someone… I’m sure you’re not perfect about everything… Nowadays people are so quick to cut people out of their lives for misunderstanding… If she had done that to you and it bothers you you should’ve spoke with her before you left your daughter in her care telling her some of these things… People Must learn to communicate clearly and effectively these days…
Straight up say mum I don’t want you putting ideas into my 6 yr olds head that shouldn’t even matter right now she’s 6,you did it to me and it made me feel like shit my whole life so don’t please.offer healthy snacks but keep the weight shit out of it
Tell her never to say anything like that again. If she does your daughter won’t be coming around anymore. You don’t care if that’s how she feels but you disagree and she isn’t allowed to say that to your daughter. If she continues find someone else.
Exactly why I don’t talk to my mother. I don’t want her doing what she did to me to my kids. She has had chances and proven she will do the same. Toxic.
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Oh no she didn’t 
don’t care she the grandmother it is not her right to say that ! Bye until you know how to Respect 
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I would FIND another option. That is so unhealthy, mentally and emotionally for that kiddo.
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Ya know I have several issues with this. Grandma is wrong hands down, but you also know how your mother is and choose to send your daughter there. You say there is no other choice but there is always another choice and what ever other options that are available to you you’re not utilizing for what ever your reasons are. Grandmas not going to change clearly hasn’t for decades but you can change your life style and find another babysitter. Figure out what is more important to you. If you actively put a child in a toxic situation that you know is toxic than you are contributing to the problem.
All the mums in here’s literally trying to shame a growing CHILD for eating a cookie. SMDH y’all need help
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Put gma in her place idk why you didn’t right there, my mom has a lot of narcissistic tendencies and I tell her the min I have an issue we aren’t fixin to play. Get her mama!
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Well I think you need think about it . What about the people.
They can be more mean
Tell your daughter just like that.
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In the meantime of trying to find an alternative place for your daughter to go - I personally (because I’m very transparent and factual at times) would just tell her that unfortunately, grandma can say very mean and hateful things. She always has but just because she says it doesn’t mean it’s true. And then reassure her that she is beautiful and beautiful in your eyes
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In the meantime of trying to find an alternative place for your daughter to go - I personally (because I’m very transparent and factual at times) would just tell her that unfortunately, grandma can sometimes say very mean and hateful things. She always has but just because she says it doesn’t mean it’s true. And then reassure her that she is beautiful and beautiful in your eyes
Eating healthy might be a good thing
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Ok enough of the pity party about not having another option…unless you want to spend your precious $$$$ for a therapist for your child or yet keep sending her to your narcissist mom to keep shaming her …plain n simple don’t allow her around her
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I would tell her she meant that he’s was wanting her to eat healthier foods since she’s growing up and getting older that way she wont be so self conscious I understand the hurt from this growing up I was done the same way and I am a big girl and alot of times when people get mad at me that’s the first thing the use against me is that I’m fat just to hurt me and then I would have a talk with mom and if she kept doing it she would no longer be let around my child until she could stop let your baby know she’s beautiful and perfect just the way she is
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My mother did thus once with my son. I very calmly told her to never bring up his weight again! And she hasn’t. Have a talk with your mom
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Maybe she was having a bad day n didn’t mean it the way it sounded just have a talk with her tell her you didn’t like it when you were growing up n you don’t want her doing it to you daug if she continues then maybe look for some one else you just should not let anyone put a child down in any way
Tell your daughter that her grandmother was wrong. And let her know that as her mother you think she’s perfect. Children lose their chubbiness without losing weight, as they grow. My youngest daughter was chubby until she reached about 12 and then she just grew up and never side ways.
I’d have a serious chat to both your daughter and your mum each privately. Explain to your mum that you’re setting a boundary with your daughter - one that she’s crossing and body weight appearance are not to be mentioned. Your 6 year old is 100% too young to be carrying those kinds of comments.
And to your daughter I’d just explain adults say nasty things … a lot, and we all say things we don’t mean/aren’t proud of sometimes - but that you’ve spoken to her about it and said it is NOT okay, should she cross that boundary again (she doesn’t respect you or your family) I’m sorry you’re going through this 
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It’s OK for you to talk to her and ask her to never say anything to your daughter about her size again. Period.
My youngest son was a big guy and my mother was worried he had “giantism” and wondered if maybe he couldn’t control his hunger. She thought I should take him to the doctor. It was so offensive. Food was a big issue as I was growing up and if we were lucky enough to get ice cream, it would be one scoop in a tiny bowl. My Dad would get it out after us kids went to bed and fill a big bowl with it. If we used too much butter, we’d get in trouble. I mean my Son grew up to be 6’1" and big boned. He grew ino it. I don’t care WHO you are, keep your big fat mouth shut about children’s size.
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I know how you feel
My grand daughters other Nan
Said the same thing to her around that age
Sad thing is my grand daughter
My grand baby won’t have anything to do with her now
In this case she feeds my other 2 grandkids nothing but take away and junk food
Now I say to my grandkids when they go and visit her, to make sure to ask for something healthy
Even if it’s a salad from subway
I know if they have had to much junk food
When they come home
As my youngest grand daughter projectiles vomits
Our mothers did the same. We all turned out just fine. In fact, we were so poor we didnt even know what poor was.
Ok, for starters…she said she was getting big, not fat…they are different. Use it as a teaching opportunity (coz regardless of her size, because I have never seen kids will say worse at school etx) and tell her that sometimes people say things hat they shouldn’t because, even as they get older, they are still learning nice ways to say things. Maybe grandma shouldn’t have said that to your daughters face, but you can turn this around. Tell her granny said it because cookies aren’t healthy and she is worried you might get unhealthy and sick if you eat too many…so cookies are an occasional treat. Don’t stop sending her to her grandmothers house, just talk to the woman.
I really don’t understand this mentality where no body talks to someone if they offend you in some way, instead just cut them from your life.
People are allowed to make mistakes, It’s how they learn from their mistakes (usually by being spoken with)
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Was your Mother telling the truth? Or is it you telling the truth?
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Sounds like Grandma is looking out for her. Sometimes we need to hear the truth and nobody else will tell you like your family especially your own mother. She is looking out for her best interest. Get out your feelings and take heed to what she said before your daughter ends up with diabetes by 9 or be obese and made fun of at school because kids are cruel. An apple is a way better option than a cookie. It has so many health benefits where a cookie is not healthy at all. Sugar is a drug. It’s part of the cocaine family. That’s why it’s single-handedly the most addicting thing. We are so sensitive these days. And if your daughter is self conscious because she is getting big change her diet. Perfect time to introduce more fruits and veggies. Good luck!
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Sounds like Grandma is looking out for her. Sometimes we need to hear the truth and nobody else will tell you like your family especially your own mother. She is looking out for her best interest. Get out your feelings and take heed to what she said before your daughter ends up with diabetes by 9 or be obese and made fun of at school because kids are cruel. An apple is a way better option than a cookie. It has so many health benefits where a cookie is not healthy at all. Sugar is a drug. It’s part of the cocaine family. That’s why it’s single-handedly the most addicting thing. We are so sensitive these days. And if your daughter is self conscious because she is getting big change her diet. Perfect time to introduce more fruits and veggies. Good luck!
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Always remind your child how beautiful they are.
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It depends ……. there is a huge difference between fat shaming and trying to teach responsible eating habits to a 6 year old. It is common practice now to not have any self discipline and eat junk all day. If Gramma is old school she will not play into that.
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That was not nice! Where is she on the growth chart? Many little girls get a little hefty before their growth spurt and by 6th 7tj grade a very slim.
Grabbing a cookie to me is a non issue. Hiding in her closet and eating the entire bag, would be a battle that needed to be fought.
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That’s horrible, I would explain to her that she is heathy just the way she is! She shamed you as a child. Don’t let her body shame your daughter
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This is exactly how my relationship with food started on a downward spiral.
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OOhh HELL NO!! PLease reassure your daughter her body is perfect the way it is. Than have a talk with your mother about how her negative comment is not ok, harmful and will only give your daughter negative feelings towards her own body. Remind your mom that she is an important role model in your daughters life and how she treats and speaks to her will have a heavy impact on her confidence and self worth. If it continues than I would limit and monitor time spent together. She may be her grandma and with that role her job is to build her up not break her down. Good luck mama!
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Well is she overweight to were it could cause health issues? If she is yeah understandable that someone is worried about her health, maybe u should too.
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She’s not gonna get any bigger eating one cookie. Why couldn’t she eat the cookie and the apple. She’s hungry and grandma is not aware that kids are suppose to eat 3 meals a day plus snacks
That was definitely body shaming! Sound like my entire family and especially mom and aunties, I hated being around family cuz of that and it made me feel ugly. Maybe it was true that the lil girl is gaining too much weight, although shaming is never going to be the way to encourage her.
Also she will lose weight in middle school. Simply walking home from school is exercise
My mom did that to me when I was about 11. Growth spurts and puberty etc. I’ll never forget it either
Tell her the truth, granny’s a witch.
You all three need to sit down an talk about what wood be good for all you think!
Difference in saying she’s getting big and calling her fat . Those two things are not the same, and as children get bigger they do need to adopt healthier eating habits.
Wow!There is a difference in wanting a child to eat healthy and calling her “ To big” or Fat!Shes 6 yrs old !I would be furious…Your child doesn’t need to hear those negative issues.This is me but I wouldn’t let my parent watch my child if she talked to any of my children like that.I mean it sounds like your mother wants her to be healthy Which is good but there is a right and wrong way to approach that and its not her job anyway !I have a 12 yr old Granddaughter that was a cute beautiful child a little chubby but so what?I never told her what she could eat and couldn’t !I limited her portions I had to her Dad our son asked me too !You don’t want your babe to have a bad self imagine mama watch your mother with her !
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I’m just wondering why your mom still has all her teeth:face_with_monocle:
Cry baby because grandma teaches healthy choices
Exactly what you just said! Tell your daughter? That your mother did it when you were little! Tell her your mother is a b! Now I have been known to make the occasional negative comments to my children? But? Snatching the cookie? Was wrong and damaging. Tell your mother doing things like that? With her comment? Can cause and eating disorder. And a whole host of other things. Tell your daughter I am so sorry. That stranger’s on here! Support her! Never mind her size!