Communicate with her. She sounds a little excited. Just talk and explain how you feel.
Look at this way sweetheart she happy again grandbabys are the best yes we can’t went to see them you took her baby now she loves your some day you will understand it better so just in joy her love for this little angel
Sounds like she’s a very happy, excited grandma. Be happy your daughter has one. The baby won’t be tiny forever so it’ll only be a short time that grandma can steal her from others. My own mom can be overbearing but then again, that’s why my children and nephews love her so much.
It doesnt stop. Good luck.
You could be grateful your child is able to experience the Grandma who is loving, caring and even available!! Some children aren’t as lucky. Ugh.
Every new mom should be this lucky
It is just excitement about her grand baby. All parents go through some sort of this. I would say have a polite chat with her about how u appreciate everything but would really like it she calmed it down just a bit.
I sure wish I had a mother to help out with my kids. She died in 2017. Trust me the spoiling is way better then having uninvolved or uncaring parents
Someday you will realize just what a gem you had in her.
Stop being negative and appreciate what many of us wished that we would have had.
My mother in law loves to spoil my son and I appreciate every bit of it, but also if she is in my bubble I usually will tell her. If I don’t like something she is doing or saw her just take my baby from someone else I would just take her aside and say “hey I know your excited but please let others visit with the baby as well.” You do not have to be rude just try to set some boundaries.
I’m confused what you’re considering madness? Seems to me she’s a happy first time grandma? Many people don’t have in laws or even parents themselves like wow…
I mean, she could be completely uninvolved…?
I’m blown away honestly…I understand some things can be annoying, but GEEZE. It’s her first grandchild! She’s excited as heck! My mother in law is always ready to see my son, her head was always in the car seat, her arms always open reaching for the baby…it’s what grandparents do! If it’s bothering you enough to make a facebook post about it then talk to her. Not a passive aggressive comment but a real conversation.
Goddamn, let her enjoy her first grandchild. She sounds excited about having one. Let me tell you, I wish my mother in law was still alive to cherish her grandbabies. She only had 6 months with my first before passing away to cancer! Now My other 2 didn’t get the chance to meet her. My own mother doesn’t even bother to call or visit! She’s an acquaintance to her 3 grandbabies. So I wish my babies have what you have. If you don’t like what she’s doing, then simply tell her. If your living with her, then move out. Either way, don’t take it for granted. Stop being selfish.
I am 100% with you on this. That would make me limit visits. I think you should just talk with her.
Okay, so apparently I’m the unpopular opinion. This isn’t okay. And it will get worse. You need to chat with your SO and set some boundaries. She should NOT be taking that baby out of your arms.
It’s going to take awhile. Her first grandchild, that baby is her whole world. As for her overspending most grandparents do…I still do an I have 9 biological grandkids…6 extended family grands an 8 great grands…needless to say I’m spending their inheritance on them now so I can enjoy the moments. What I don’t do is “brag” about how much I give. I do it from my heart. You should have a talk with her about that. Congratulations mom an dad. Good luck in the future.
Talk to your husband.
Tbh it sounds like your the issue, the overbearing first time mother? She’s an excited grandma that wants to spoil her grandchild and your fucking mad? Grow up hunny!
Be grateful she has a grandmother who loves her to pieces. That what grandmothers do.
I am a grandma now of 2 I aways wait to see if my daughter says yes take her or him out of the car seat but yes we r excited to see r new babies ask ur husband to politely tell her to back off alittle I did say politely!
Why not just be thankful Your daughter has a grandmother… Try to remember there a children that don’t have any grandmother’s , IE like my 6 year old who has cried so many times because she doesn’t have a grandmother (one died before she was born and one when she was too little to remember). Suck it up and let your daughter enjoy the love from grandmother, if you have a problem maybe leave your husband his mum and daughter to enjoy there time and remove yourself from the situation when she visits, take it as some you time, if it bothers you so much… At the end if the day let your daughter enjoy her grandmother she won’t be around for ever…
Tell her to back off wear baby in a carrier and when she tries to take her say NO. You need to use your voice and speak up. Just because she’s grandma and excited doesn’t mean she is allowed to do things with your child you are uncomfortable with. Anything she buys can stay at her house. If she still continues to grab the baby, limit how much you come around or allow her to come around until she can stop.
Id be telling her to step back that’s your child not hers
So…she cares?! Buys her stuff?! Helps u with her?! And you’re complaining… I’m confused.
Aw she sounds like shes just excited and loves her grandbaby. Maybe just tell her as much as you love how much she loves your baby (because you should, theres never too much love) you are feeling a little overwhelmed and would appreciate if she wasnt so full on.
you should feel so lucky though to have such a loving mil, not everyone has that. I feel blessed everyday for my mil, I really lucked out and shes as loving and doting as yours seems to be.
Be thankful that she loves her that much. She is still new and being a grandmother is a feeling like no other. Personally…I didn’t know I could love someone so much! Let her enjoy being a grandmother.
She sounds extremely excited and proud. Set boundaries right away though…talk to her…tell her how u feel. It’s her first grandchild…its a big deal to her. If u dont set the rules and boundaries now, you may pay for it big time later on.
Why don’t you actually talk to her about instead of complaining on fb. Appreciate that she buys your child stuff and wants to spend time with her. My boys other grandma doesn’t hardly have anything to do with them and we literally live 5-10 minutes away from her.
She sounds excited. I would just sit her down and have a talk with her about it.
my son was the first grandchild and the first great grandchild of both mine and my sons dads familys and non of them acted like this no where near to this theres loving a baby and buying stuff to help out or you walked past something cute in a shop and bought it but to buy loads of clothes rub it in the mums face and to be up in the child face and taking the baby out of peoples arms because she wants him/her is out of order i get shes happy but shes goong about it completly wrong
Let her buy. She’s proud of being grandma.
Take everything she got your girl and give it back . That will. Stop her.
She sounds excited but if you dont feel comfortable with it, which YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BTW, then tell her to back off. That is your child, not hers. Communicate. If she cannot understand then from that point more decisions need to be made. Everyone, regardless of who it is, needs to understand that baby is yours and you’re going to have boundaries. You’re not wrong for feeling this way, just talk to her and express your feelings, then set boundaries.
Take your child away from her. Very calmly tell her to back off and quit being annoying. My ex MIL did the same…I ended up packing up the items and dropped it off with a bang on the table.
Tell her to open a 529 or some other saving account for her and put money in for her instead of gifts. By the time your daughter is ready for college it will be payed for !!
I had this problem when my baby was first born. I understand this is her first baby but it was my first too. My mother in law is very overbearing at times and it caused resentment at first. You just need to sit down and talk to her about how you feel and come to an agreement. It does get better with time and you will be grateful that your daughter has a grandma that would do anything for her. Take it from someone that has been there!
She is a GRANDMA! and she just loves her!! Embrace it!
Just have an adult conversation about boundaries with her, she is excited with her first grandchild
“You should be thankful.” No one said she wasn’t. But if you ask someone not to do something involving your kid all y’all would be annoyed too.
talk to her about it and let her know it bothers you
Maybe she shouldn’t give a damn, then you could bitch about that too
Let her know nicely that she either respects what u want for ur daughter or she wont get as much time with her. She raised her kids how she wanted to now she needs to let u do the same hun. The longer u let her get away with it the harder its gonna be later to nip it in the bud.
She sounds like she is just so happy to be a grandmother ! I would be thankful . You are very blessed to have her in your life !
She’s a new grandma you are a new mom, be patient and feel blessed that your daughter has two woman who LOVE her!
That sounds like my mom. They’re just excited and happy to be a grandparent. Enjoy the help… I’m a stay at home mom to a 4 month old, and have a 4 and 6 year old as well. I LOVE it when people take her for a few minutes. I’m breastfeeding so she’s literally on me all day every day.
Sounds like a grandma!
If I didn’t think she had the best intentions I would suggest talking to her, but what is she hurting really? Your feelings? When she takes the baby from everyone, give her a few minutes for a cuddle, then gently but firmly say, hey gramma, time to give her back to auntie for her snuggles. Pick your battles. These really shouldn’t be.
Talk to her and tell her the rules
.I just became a G ma, my daughter set the rules…
Setting boundaries isn’t a bad thing. It’s so important, actually. Sit down with your husband and get on the same page about what boundaries you want to set. Then both of you should sit down with her and let her know that there need to be a few changes now that you’ve added a baby to your family. Hopefully she respects the boundaries. If not, an evaluation of your relationship needs to happen.
Stop going over there. Make her keep the shit she buys at her own house. Don’t use the shit exchange it. Etc etc etc. Stop acting so helpless.
First grandchild or not you need to just sit her down and have a conversation w/ her ! Don’t let anyone tell you you’re wrong for wanting her to respect your boundaries.
I wish my mother or mother in Law were closer one lives in cali and the other in Montana both Are Still Involved And Face Time My Son But It Would Be Amazing To Have Them Spoil Him Or Poke Their Heads In His Carseat
Isn’t this what grannies do?! Love, spoil their grandbabies?
I have this problem… my son is the 2nd grandchild for my in-laws but their first lives in texas and we are in florida but both babies were born last year… just ones farther away…so really they only have mo son.(almost 9months now) but the entire first 2month if his life they were constantly trying to get me to feed my son this and that always saying it’s fine we used to that way when we were babies(mind you my father in law in completely over weight and big[not trying to be rude] but alot of older people have that issues of over weight cause back then you could feed your kid whatever instantly and not get shamed or worry bout what’s in the food like now adays) but my father in laws mom constantly feed him taters or vegetables and this… constantly telling them no my kid will drink formula until about 4-5months then we’ll start introducing him to baby food 1 at a time… well my sons about 1 1/2months old and my mother in law made homemade icecream and shes in the middle of eating chocolate chunk and shesGIVING MY DAMN SON 1 1/2MONTHS ICECREAM!! I was so mad and I told her she needed to stop they got pissed at me and was like" I can do what I want" and I was so mad not only that shes constantly telling her son(myhusband) I’m the adult in the coversation… idgaf who you are or what age just because you’re older doesn’t mean you get to do whatever with my son… we are his parents so we over go whatever you say or want with our child… ugh I feel you momma
She buys things for your kid? Oh your poor thing. I guess it couldn’t get much worse.
I don’t know what to tell you. I have 6 grandbabies, and I can’t love them enough! But I don’t spoil them because I am not wealthy. I would probably spoil every one of them if I had the means to do so.
Our grandchildren are an extension of us, as children are of their parents. We want to see our children happy, and we want to see our grandchildren happy. By the time we become grandparents, we’ve learned so much about life, including being reminded daily that we’re getting older and may not have as much time left with our families as we’d like.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your mother in law, and if you don’t have a close enough relationship with her to sit down and have a civil heart to heart conversation, talk to your husband, and ask him to talk with her.
Family is family, and you’ll hopefully have years of happy times ahead.
I can tell you, my mother in law and I had a lot of friction between us, because she would walk in and take over my house as if it was hers. I resented her for that, and she knew how I felt, but I bit the bullet and allowed it out of respect for my husband, who respected his mother enough not to challenge her. But I never had a problem with her spoiling my children with love and gifts.
You are soooooo lucky !!!
Oh boo Hoo cry about a grandparent buying your child things.They could be the opposite and never buy your child anything!!! You have issues…
Be thankful. Wait till you have a few more. You’ll be loving it.
Let her enjoy being a grandmother! She will love your daughter and contribute much to her happiness!
Tell her to fuck off
You would think that a mother would be happy for their children to have MORE people to love them and not see it as a compitition or intimidating when someone is showing their child love. Especially the grandma with a FIRST grandchild. Yeah, go ahead and do all you can to push her away so your daughter doesnt have extra love.
Ummmmmm…yeah?? That’s what Grandma’s do. Just roll with it
She sounds excited.
Be happy your child has people who love her that much. Grandparents are amazing and can make great babysitters too!
With the grabbing baby off other people just say they want cuddles too
Let her be, let her but things, let her be closer to baby and let her soak up as much of that baby as she can. All the stuff she buys is to help you not hurt you and just be gentle when it comes to her wanting to hold baby so much and remind her to share the cuddles and as far as being so close baby can’t see well beyond their own arms reach so this helps baby see Grandma better and smelling a new baby is intoxicating. She is excited to have a grandbaby and it’s hard to not go a bit crazy sometimes but she will settle down and so will you talk to her about calming down a bit but don’t be too harsh unless she starts to cross bigger lines than these.
How dare her love your baby! I only wish I got to meet my mother in law. She passed away before I met my husband
Sorry. This is not madness. It’s the excitement of a grandchild finally. You think she is over acting. No. You are over reacting. Relax and enjoy.
I wish y’all would stop giving her shit. It’s her daughter. She’s entitled to her feelings. She’s allowed to be annoyed with someone’s behavior. Based on the context her post, she’s also a first time mom. There’s probably still a lot of things that she isn’t comfortable with such as someone taking her two month old daughter out of her arms without asking. Sure, it’s nice that MIL is in the picture but she still needs to respect boundaries if the mom asked her to.
Remind her whose child she is and lay down the boundaries now.
To all of you jugde mental assholes is Missing the point she is making. Yes it’s nice the grandmother buys things but to brag and throw it up in her face is wrong and disrespectful to her as a mom.
These comments are brutal. I dont know if this is your first but SOME moms especially only 2 months postpartum are very protective of their kids. In a sense of when they are seperated anxiety takes over. My husbands family is the same way as far as taking my babes as soon as 1 ft is in the door. I had to leave my nephews bday party recently because the gma started balling because I told her my son had just woke up from the car and to give him a couple mins. Boundaries are necessary. You can be polite and just hold on to your babe until after a few mins. Eventually she will back off a little. And as far as buying things. I agree take as much as you can get because kids cost a furtune.
Shes loving your baby.some people would pray for a doting grandparent.dont be mean honestly,please try see the positive side of it.She will be loving and cherishing every moment.Its not so much bragging its exciting
Why discount how she feels about the situation? This is her child, so her decision.
Not alot of people have be glad you have a grandparent that loves your little one so much. Could be worse and not care about your little one at all
It just comes down to being a power struggle between you and her. that baby will be treasured by its grandparent and that is what you have to remind yourself of. is it obnoxious and overbearing, yes. but it is fueled by love and infatuation with that little blessing. The baby cant have too much love. Remember it’s her 1st time being a grandparent as well as your 1st time being a mom and you guys have to figure out a balance together.
Let her be it is her first grandchild they are special. You will understand that when it’s your first grandchild
I have a friend who is always buying things for the grand kids. Now it is at a point where whenever they see her the first thing from their mouths is, “What did you buy me grandma?” I have a 3 month old grand daughter that I spoil with all my love and not materialistic things.
My daughter is about to birth my 6th grandchild in just 6 days or before and I’m just as excited about the 6th one as I was about the 1st and maybe more now this one is a girl after 5 boys.
You selfish AF. Let her bask in the shine and joy of having a grand baby damn. Females like you make me sick so ungrateful
I would just let her be. Let her have her moments of joy! My 11month old has one living grandparents which is my father and he is too busy with his life to bother with her and it’s heartbreaking to think this is all she has I would do anything to have this for my child. I bet she is just so in love with her and wants to express it in every way possible xx
I had 3 kids and didn’t have any help from family now I have 3 grandkids enjoy having grandparents to help never push them away
let her love her grandbaby there will come a time when you will appreciate her and her help and whats more there will be many times when you need her !! imagine how you would feel if she didn’t love or care about you baby? somethings are just not worth getting petty and gnarly and overlooking her as an asset to you and your daughter hope the tension this causes you eases soon good luck and enjoy your famil x
Have your SO talk to her!!! SET BOUNDARIES EARLY OR IT WILL GET WORSE.
Be grateful she loves her grand baby lol otherwise you’ll be here making a post saying how she doesn’t spend time with her or do anything
Nanny be learning her new role too. Give it time
So you’re mad because granny is generous and can’t get enough of her only grandkid??..
And why is that a problem? She is doing what grandmas do! She excited but u r being bitchy… maybe you should seek some therapy as post partum depression is a real thing!
How does ur mother act
grandparents are the best,give her time, it’s her first time to be a grandma too, but I get where you’re coming from, just give her some more time , she’s just excited
Most of yall are missing the point. The MIL isnt respecting the mothers wishes. Thats wrong. She needs to sit the MIL down and explain that shes being disrespectful and if the MIL doesnt quit then she wont be seeing the granddaughter. Start correcting the MIL behavior. Like if she takes the baby from someone then take the baby back. If this behavior isnt stopped it could ser the stage for bad behavior from the child. No one overrides the childs parents. Thats what’s happening.
As soon as you walk in the door (?) , don’t visit very often. Brags about what she buys, tell her you didn’t ask her to buy anything, but ‘thank You’. Never had your problem. My mother-in-law never came to our place so she seldom saw our son often. My Mom had my younger siblings so she wasn’t around either.
Bottom line: you can’t change anyone’s behavior but yours. Seriously, get over it & worry about what you do, not anyone else
put your BIG GIRL panties on & be a adult. By not saying anything, she feels this is OK !!! When my first grandchild was born, I brought a lot of clothes, etc for him, his mother (this was my son’s son) appreciate it. And I would have loved if someone brought everything for my kids when they were little & I wouldn’t have given a shit whether they bragged about it or not
My MIL has no concept of boundaries - she let my daughter put her hand in her mouth the other day and didn’t remove it… Days later my baby is really poorly
It doesn’t get better, I’ve even tried saying something a while ago, now I just get evils and interrupted constantly.
You and OH need to discuss boundaries with her, be united and do it quickly x
Maybe she’s just overjoyed right now. The only way to change this is to let her know how you feel . If you aren’t close enough with her have your husband speak with her.
Thank her for the gifts and donate them.
We don’t have contact with my in laws but once my mom bragged about all the things she’s bought the kids and I stopped her right there about it. I told her look I didn’t ask for this stuff this is what you did, on your own. I’m very grateful for what she has gotten the kids don’t get me wrong. I asked her if it was necessary for her to bring up the all things? I had thought they were bought with love and the way she was acting didn’t seem like love to me; That it seemed more like trying to score points or something. The kids aren’t gonna remember what was bought for them but the time that was spent with them they will carry and treasure.
Just chill, grandma just is in love with her. Not madness my dear, she’s totally in love with her. Cut her some slack