How would you feel if your in laws forced church upon your kids? my husband and i both work nights and when we work our teens (13) are forced to go to church even though they do not wish too…its not legal for us to leave them home alone all night and it makes me uncofomfortable so thats why they stay at our in laws…i wouldnt mind if my kids were interested in that relgion but so far they have not chose one like me and my husband and I am kinda irritated they keep forcing my kids to go against their will…i have talked to my MIL about just taking them to my house before church starts and she refuses and will drop them off after even though it is not out of her way to do it before…am i wrong to feel some type of way about this?
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My mother-in-law forces my kids to go to church: Advice?
To each their own but id be happy if my sitter took my son to church 
if you don’t like grandmas way of teaching then find another sitter?
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It’s not that big of deal 
find someone else to watch them for free then
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Tell them no. That’s not okay.
You can leave your kids home alone at 13 and long as you trust them and they understand and abide by y’all’s rules you are not wrong for feeling that way they are at an age where if they don’t like going they shouldn’t be forced to go
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If you’re home go pick them up yourself, if not and they can’t legally stay home by themselves (like you said) then yes they have to go
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Maybe find alternative care if you don’t want your children going to church.
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Pay a babysitter at YOUR own house.
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Their home their rules.
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What state don’t allow a 13 year old to stay home alone at night? Oregon allows kids to stay home as long as they can handle the responsibilities if anything that is reasonably expected to happen during that amount of time.
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How is it illegal to leave a 13yr old home alone?
If your getting free babysitting, shut up, hire a sitter to come to your home, how old are they, church won’t hurt them.
Why don’t you pick them up before she takes them to church
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You could always start paying a sitter! But why cant they stay home alone at 13?
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Youre the mother take charge and tell her bring them home before they go to church if she keeps this up then she wouldnt be having access to my kids. I started staying home alone at 12 nothing illegal we had rules no different then when my parents were home theybwere very simple, dont answer the door dont answer the phone unless its them and they leave a message to go ahead and call back first, keep curtains and doors shut and locked ,keep the dog inside and out of their crates for protection and stay in the house.
Where do you live. Are you sure it’s not legal. At 13 a child should be able to be at home while their parents work.
Then find somebody else to watch them. When my mom has my kids she takes them to church with her 
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They can stay home by themselves at 13
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I’d thank them. More children need church.
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Find a new babysitter 
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Not going to hurt them
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Find new babysitters
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NOPE! I would not take them there then. This needs to be your children’s choice. I’ve seen what religious brainwashing does and it’s not pretty.
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She shouldn’t be held back from going to church just because they’re at her house. She can’t leave them home unattended either. I’m not religious either. I wouldn’t force them to go. I would flat out refuse to get into the car.
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Well if I was keeping someone’s kids on Sunday and they couldn’t be left home alone, they would be at church with me. God comes first in our house, so I’m going. If someone didn’t want their kids coming to church then they would need to find another sitter.
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Children need church 
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Where are you located that it’s illegal to leave 13 year olds home alone?
If it’s this much of a concern, pick them up on your way home from work in the morning so they don’t have to go.
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Um yea no that would not be happening whatsoever. And anyone who thinks this isn’t a big deal is messed up. If they have said they do not want to go that they are not interested in said religion and u the parent have asked them to be dropped off prior to going then they are forcing their religion onto literal children and crossing boundaries. I’d be looking into a different babysitter or having them stay home alone.
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I’m sorry but it IS A HUGE DEAL. To those saying it doesn’t hurt … I can assure it does and can , religion is personal. I would have a serious talk. It’s creepy she is insisting
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Only three States currently have laws regarding a minimum age for leaving a child home alone: Illinois, 14 years old; Maryland, 8 years old; and Oregon, 10 years old. - if you know your children will do what is needed (doors locked, bed time routine, etc), I don’t see why you can’t leave them home.
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If you ain’t taking them to church let her take him. When he’s an adult he can make a better knowledgeable decision in his faith. You can’t expect him to make a good decision if he doesn’t know that side
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When we .were little and stay at grandmaw house on saturday night you best bet we were made to go to church that just the way it is if u dont like it Find another sitter
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Wow I can’t believe how many of you are ok with forced religion… No, it’s not ok and you need to find a way to get them away from that ish
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You should be thankful
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My grandma would watch us and made us go all the time
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She’s watching them as a free favor. If you don’t like what comes with their house rules then pay a sitter. Imposing your rules on their home isn’t how life works.
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I would 100% not like this. Where do you live that they can’t stay home? I would not want to keep giving my kids to my mil if she was forcing an agenda/idea on my kids that they were u comfortable with. Kids should be allowed time, and as much of it as they want, to figure that out for themselves without biased from others.
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Good that they have some values in their life and will know who to rely upon in times of need instead of pple who will only have command in their lives
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Well, if your in-laws go to church, and you aren’t comfortable with them staying home alone, then they have to go with them to church. 
If you don’t want them going then you should find someone else to watch them.
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Honestly, I’m not religious at all. But anytime we were at my grandma’s house on a Sunday morning she made us go to church. I hated it. But in no way did it hurt me.
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You pick them up before church. She doesn’t have to stop going just because they don’t want to go. Either pick them up beforehand or find someone else to watch your kids.
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Be thankful you have free childcare and going to church is certainly not going to kill them once a week, a little gratitude goes a long way.
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You are not wrong to feel the way you feel. That being said. If it is making you and your children that uncomfortable, then you need to find alternate child care. At least on church days.
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Your seriously mad because your children might get a taste of religion??
I hated going as a kid too, but as a grandmother myself now, I cherish my personal relationship with religion.
& I try to study multiple religions. Church is just another form of education. Why change your attitude about them going & maybe theirs will change & they may just learn a few things & make some decent friends & have some safe fun things to do 
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my grandmother forced me to go when I was with her. and my son goes with my mother in law when he is with her. it’s a given. they stay the night they go to church.
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Nope you’re not wrong. I’d be PISSED and wouldn’t be letting them around my kids for a long time if ever. It is a huge deal. Kids should not be forced into a religion or to attend a religious service because a caretaker is a member of that religion. This is completely wrong on their end. They’ll them they HAVE to return your children to your home prior to church and don’t let them stomp your boundaries
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Absolfuckinglutely not. If she refuses to drop them off before church she’s definitely intentionally forcing it and you should find someone else to watch them.
If that’s not an option, I myself would yell my kids to go ahead and go but they are free to not participate in any way shape or form. If someone has a problem with them sitting or standing still and politely while not praying/kneeling/singing/ whatever it is they do, that’s a them problem and I guess they shouldn’t be forcing anyone to do anything.
Mu kids have always and will always have their choice when it comes to religion, I have taught them a little about mine, they went to a Christian church with a relative for as long as THEY WANTED to go and when they wanted to quit those relatives were angry with me and accusing me off “keeping them from church”.
So I have no patience for people like this.
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Find another sitter.
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Not going to hurt them. Be thankful.
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Teaches religious tolerance and exceptance. Nothing bad about learning about others religion to better understand their friends and family. They don’t have to believe it but they atleast can learn to respect the people who do.
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Pick your kids up when you get off work in the morning.
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Yes if kids are given a choice none of them would choose church. Its our responsibility as Christians to teach them about God because if we don’t the world will teach them about satan. Why would anyone not want there child to know about the man who went through so much pain and anguish and death for them.
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Every time I’ve been in a church, it’s been forced. It’ll be OK lol.
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Why don’t you pick them up in the morning when you get off work on Sunday morning
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Not a chance to many pedophiles in churches
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They’re with her, she’s going to church, which means they have to go to. Just like if she was going to the market, she would take them with her even if they didn’t want to go. There’s no harm in it. If you don’t like it, then you should pick them up or seek alternate care.
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So why don’t you go for your kids before church starts? Pick them up as soon as you get off work. She doesn’t want to drop them off before church, you don’t want them in church, then go collect them instead of whining about it 
.
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Even though it’s wrong of her to “force” the kids , but in saying that , they are under her roof and you are getting a sitter for free. So if you don’t want her taking the kids to church , I’d suggest you pay for a baby sitter.
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Unfortunately if she’s watching them then they go where she goes. Go pick them up if you don’t want them going.
I hated going to church but I survived lol. They’ll be alright.
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If they are in her care and she goes to church then they will attend also, I mean your complaining that they have to go, what other choice does she have? Leave them alone? Same situation your in. Find another sitter but I assume she is a free sitter and If you really didn’t want them to attend, you and your hubs would find someone else.
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They’ll be okay, be thankful
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Could be worse things… just saying…
Growing up if we stayed at my grandmothers on Saturday night then we went to church on Sunday! Her house her rules!
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What have you got against them going to church it sure is not going to hurt them when they get older they can do what they want right now they might learn something that will help them later
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And I would stop sending them I would figure out a different work schedule for either mom or dad.
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I am a grandmother and greatgrandmother and I want my grands to GO TO AT LEAST SUNDAY SCHOOL
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Ok so find a babysitter who can watch your kids on Sundays. No religion should be forced on anyone-there are over 4000 recognized religions around the world. Just find a babysitter so yall can sleep. Nightshift sux. It’s hard to transition from nightshift to day shift.
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You’re completely entitled to how you feel. Find a new sitter. Easy peasy.
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Nothing forced is a good thing … Nothing!!!
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get a different sitter—pay them. The end
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YOU can pick them up beforehand. If you don’t like her schedule, don’t leave your kids with her, go get them before she leaves or pay an actual sitter.
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They’re literally watching your kids for free. And you’re wanting them to waste gas & take them to your alls house then come back by & get them to take them back home with them after church? They may feel uncomfortable leaving them at their house too alone so what do you expect them to do with them? Get real lady or find another babysitter.
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Pick your kids up before they go to church or find a different sitter.
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Your kids, your rules. If she refuses to follow your rules, look into other childcare options or pick them up when you get off work before church.
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I wouldn’t want my kids taken to church, but I would not take free babysitting from someone who wanted to take them. Find another means of childcare.
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I’d go nuts… put your foot down, they’re you’re kids. I wouldn’t let my kids go anywhere near a place like that… yuck.
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In the south it’s not forced religion and that’s the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life, here you spend Saturday night with Grammy then you know on Sunday your tail is going to church on Sunday it’s just a fact so pack your Sun clothes.
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It’s not like it’s a forever situation. Why not compromise for every other week
Say thank you for watching my children and keeping the safe. Do not nit pick a blessing because you will be sorry if it goes away.
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I don’t think she should not go to church if that’s what she wants to do . Her life belief and values are very separate from yours. You will have to decide what your priority is in this case and what your boundaries are, best wishes 
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their house their rules
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If you expect her to keep your kids overnight then you can’t decide where she takes them!
Sounds like you could use some Jesus in your life.
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Her house, her rules. Plus she may not feel comfortable leaving them alone either… if you don’t like it, then pick them up in the mornings when you get off. Otherwise deal with it. There’s nothing wrong with them going to church
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Find another childcare provider
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Free is never free. People who are willing to watch your kids for free are exposing them to whatever lifestyle they’re into. While I totally understand you being upset for your kids because they don’t want to do this, now you have a choice to make. Church or no free childcare.
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They NEED church and your mother in law KNOWS this!
She may be planting a seed that they will appreciate later in life.
Sorry, not sorry:woman_shrugging:
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If you don’t want them going, find another sitter.
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I guess I don’t understand what you think she should do? You don’t want your kids home alone, she goes to church… are you suggesting she should stop going to accommodate your free childcare needs? Find someone else who doesn’t attend church if you don’t want them going. It’s completely understandable if you don’t want her making these choices for your kids, however, you can’t choose for her either. She goes, if you don’t want your kids to, take them somewhere else. 
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Well what’s up with your man because it’s his mom tell him to regulate
One of you change your shift and have you’re kids home at night problem solved!
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Find a new sitter. You’re going to have to pay but it’ll be worth knowing your kids are comfortable.
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More kids need a grandma like her. She’s instilling morals and values in your kids. We all need Jesus.
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I’m out at “forced” anything
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I don’t know
They should go to church the way this world is going
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Find a new babysitter, good luck on the free part though.
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It’s not going to hurt them
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I mean, if it bothers you that much than I would look into finding another person to watch your children.
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Dude… seriously?? 
choose your battles. Your children will have to do MANY things in life that’s they ‘don’t want to do’.
There are so many other things to be ‘livid’ about and this ain’t it, baby.
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If they are going to church in the morning then they can be home alone at that time. If it is just the one day a week that she takes them to church have them try to stay somewhere else that one night a wk.
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