I am sorry this has hurt you and your boys. You do not mention your MIL’s age but the forgetfulness can be a sign of many illnesses. My father would dominate the conversations - later we found out he could not make out the conversation and did that not so he would be involved and not make appear to make a stupid answer to a question. I have 7 grandkids and my oldest said I
Should name a dog Barney or Steve because when they are all there - I screw up their names and then say Barney or Steve ……. They laugh and it is fun.
My grandparents always called me Linda it didn’t bother me.
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My advice - grow up; enjoy family now, make memories and who cares…in the end your kids are that… yours.
No you are not crazy … but we can’t fight every battle, if we want to WIN the War … and keep your marriage in tact … Men think differently than women - and I understand your hurt BUT decide which is more important, your MIL or your marriage. I am the eldest in a family of 11 siblings and because our parents saw one set of g/children every day … they KNEW them better and it resulted in a “situation” - but it’s a situation where you will have to decide to ignore and maybe tell your sons, that G’ma is not remembering as she gets older, that happens 2, though I see your concern. PRAY … as Prayer is the MIGHTIEST Influence. It it’s being done to upset you, still try to ignore as when pp’l do things on purpose, what they want is a “reaction”… If they don’t get one, then UR pulling the rug from under their feet !!! We, as God’s people, should really try to ACT the way he wants us to and not RE-ACT to people and circumstances . TUFF yes, but th ONLY way. Where God leads, He EMPOWERS.
The person here who is the most uncomfortable is you. And who is making you uncomfortable? You are. Storming off from a family gathering is crazy.
Honestly asked yourself if you would be this upset if it was your mother/parental figure or if you would forgive the mistake.
No you don’t she is a older woman just walk a mile in her shoes you will understand why
Let it go…if she remembers their first name be thankful. Growing up my mother called out the names of her 3 daughters, the cat and the dog until she got to the one name she intended. Also men don’t take things like this personally, you are making it difficult for your husband because he is not sharing in being offended. You’re making too much of this.
I think the OP sounds petty. Causing a scene going to a hotel and refusing to visit is childish. Life is too short. If it bothers you that much, buy her a calendar and put all relevant dates on it. Not participating in conversations is like throwing a tantrum. You held on to this for over a year. Get over it or die with it. In the grand scheme of life, it’s not that big of a deal.
I live a few miles from my family and can’t remember there brithdays not a big issue to them mostly we laugh about it
I can tell you what month my grandchildren were born but I screw up on the day every time. I have a slew of nieces and nephews and greats and I’m lucky to get the first name right let alone the middle name. I don’t do it intentionally but I’ve been like this since I was a child.
My grandchildren live about 25 miles away but we don’t see them much because they are in every sport and extra club, cheer so they are super busy and my daughter does not make any time for us to see them.
Be glad your children have grandparent and as long as they know their first name and acknowledge them
Let it go.
My daughters are 21 and 26 years older than my son who the only grandparent was my mother. She came to one birthday party and at Christmas would give him a cheap toy from the dollar store while the other kids all got piles of stuff. When she died he stayed home with his dad because she never attempted to be a grandmother to him.
Life’s too short. My husbands family was the same way with all 3 of our children so I refused to go to his family events. My children were ignored and so was I and my husband was like oh well. Hubby has no relationship with his siblings and when I see them they want to know why; my response is call your brother.
He had 3 family members die and we weren’t informed about one for over a year.
Build a bridge and get over it. Life is way too short to get this upset over something this trivial. Be the adult, not the pouting child.
Have you considered that dementia may be coming on.You sound like you have touch of it too.Don’t be petty.
I always remember the year and month my grandkids were born but sometimes I’ll be off a little bit on the day.
She chose to remember what she want to remember, but don’t let this be contentious situation between family you may not win this battle,my grandmother always told me to pick your battles wisely,she is who she is life is short.
Love is the only thing that matters. Sadly, you Forgot that.
I don’t see the problem. You will be old some day,I bet you won’t remember everything as you did when you were younger.
Made me really sad that you carried on this way with your mother in-law. You clearly weren’t taught to respect your elders or mother in-law that should be like a second mother to you. As people age they forget things, don’t always want to travel, but who cares as long as love is at the forefront. I take care of my elderly Mom and she forgets things but loves all her grandkids but clearly lives with mine so she is really close to them. She loves my sister’s kids as well and gets so excited to see them when they visit. These things are so trivial and not meant to hurt anyone, you are clearly doing the hurting by being so dramatic and carrying on like that at your mother in-law’s. Please don’t teach your kids to hate, get angry at people’s especially their grandma. You’re teaching him to resent and build animosity towards a person who might really love them but is older and sometimes forgets. My mom often calls me by her deceased sister’s name and I always laugh and take it with a grain assault.( and I loved my aunt to pieces so it’s an honor if I remind her of her) Help your kids understand that elders forget, might not have the same will or energy to move how they used too but it’s grandma and they have to love her especially when she clearly loves her grandkids. You should apologize for your mean behavior. Teach love and compassion, it’s your duty to keep your kids relationship with family especially elders alive. You live a little distance away so you visit and build happy memories for them and yourself. I would be very hurt by your actions, good luck trying to repair this, really hope it works for the kids sake as well as for your poor husband.
How old is she. Maybe something is wrong with her brain.
Don’t stress… it’s a minor deal. Just let it go, laugh about it and carry on. You will all be happier.
It is harder to remember every birthday and middle name the older we get. How do you want to be treated when you’re the one who forgets?
I think there is an underlying problem. I know I have times when I have called my youngest daughter by her older sisters name. It is not intentional. I would not worry by such a mistake by not remembering middle name. You will see when you get older.
Life is short. Come to terms with how you “feel”. Tell your kids she is getting older & it is harder for older people to remember. She won’t be around to much longer. 
For me it depends on more than this one incident. If said MIL has a history of treating you and yours as ‘second hand’ then id say youre in the right but address it directly if you can. Otherwise, maybe the lady is getting old?
Sad maybe that are getting older and that is the reason since they don’t see them everyday.
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Actually it wouldn’t bother me I have four grandchildren and I don’t know any of this middle name they live close to me
Whether or not you should be upset about it is being overshadowed by your immature overreaction to the situation. When people get older their memory isn’t what it was & the fact that you aren’t front and center in their lives lends itself to forgetfulness. Stop being a spoiled brat and adding fuel to the fire.
My mother never gave my kids anything. No big deal , why make it.
My Mom only had 4 grandchildren. She’s gone now. She did know all their names and birthdays. Near the end, maybe not because of dementia. Very rarely did she ever send birthdays cards or anything. She felt that if she didn’t send to one. She shouldn’t send to either. (I have 3 children) I tried to explain they just wanted to receive something from her. A late birthday card, 6 months late is better then none! Nothing! My Dad, remembers his “own” grandchildren Very rarely. Especially mine. We live several hundred miles away. His 2nd wife’s grandchildren. Spoils them rotten. Does he know birthdays or complete names 
. Really don’t know. Not worth getting upset about. My in-laws, they’re deceased now. They had a whole truckload of grandchildren, great grandchildren and a great great granddaughter too. I don’t suspect they knew all the birthdays either. A few they only saw a couple times. Lived in other states. Middle names. I doubt they remembered them all. Probably forgot a couple first names too. The ones that lived close by she remembered. Plus, she had everyone’s birthdays on her 
. Till the last year or 2. We’d always receive a birthday card from her. I really miss my Mom n law, My other Mom! 
I think she is over reacting!!! Really acting like a bitch!! Not talking, acting all sulked up, Wow! how is that helping anything??? Her kids are old enough to sort things out for themselves!Next time her husband needs to leave her at home!!! My grandmother used to call us all by someone else’s name, I’m sure she had her picks but that was okay because I knew she loved me!!
Sounds to me like someone has to obtain a little maturity
There are worse things in life to get that upset, it may be disappointing but to cause turmoil over petty things like that is so not necessary.
Get over it I can’t even count how many names my mother called me. Big deal
Get over it. Middle names aren’t something everyone remembers.
its hard for some of us to remember everything -dates names etc and the older we get the harder it is your time is coming so dont judge unless you have walked in those shoes
I think you are making a mountain out of a molehill. Talk about over reacting. How petty can you be. You must have a saint for a husband to put up with your childish pettiness.
Getting mad about a middle name is so small 
First , I would have to ask, how old is she n how many does she have???
I feel like there is more to this story… like the middle name is just the straw that broke the camels back… at least thats what it sounds like to me. But if its not and this is really your only issue then you need to stop being upset at her and let the child that she hurt stand up for himself and tell his Mama that it hurt his feelings… its no longer a you issue and mil issue its a grandma and grandchild issue now
What if it is early dementia, Alzheimer’s…
Mountain out of a mole hill. Ever think she may have memory issues?
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Don’t waste your time on a mother in law that doesn’t care. Do what is necessary to keep your husband pacified but don’t waste your time and emotions on a granny who chooses not to pay attention. Has hubby tried to explain that it bothers you and your son?
You do, he didn’t, get over it. It’s his mother
Sounds like the problem may not be entirely with your mother-in-law. BTW. How old is she?
Maybe the MIL has memory problems. Do your kids call her? Write letters?
No. My dad forgets my bday half the time and I can guarantee does not know my kids middle names. Let it go!!!
Give her a Birthday Calendar as a present with all your names on. No excuse then.
Everyone here has given you great advice. Take it to heart, you are the problem, don’t teach your kids to over react like you’re doing.
Oh my goodness, let it go. You are behaving like a spoiled brat. You are also teaching your children to behave like you. Someday you may not remember as well as you do right now.
Give your MIL a break, as we get older our memory starts to act up on us, just remind us,
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Haha. I do that. I call my Grand daughters husband Michael and his name is Steven. My son is Michael LOL
Exactly!! Hell, I can’t even remember my name and birthday sometimes!
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Life.is to short.time to be the better person and forgive
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Make them a calendar. Fill in all important dates including name’s.
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I send out calendars w all the birthdays. No excuse
I’m thinking get over your wounded ego, Stuff like that happens people forget get over it. wow listen to you.
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A lot of dads don’t even know their own kids birthdays.
Please remember,it is u Husband’s Mother.
So forgive her.Are u children upset over that or just u.
What a childish woman to get so upset over petty things
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Remember she will not always be with you. Just be patient
I have 14 grandchildren & 16 gr3at
She could have early signs of dementia
As long as she knows their first name!!!
Sounds like MIL has dementia
Get over yourself and stop taking everything so personally
My Mom called almost all of her kids the wrong name, no biggie. If that is your grief in life, your lucky.
I forgot name of my own kids I have to call all 3 sometime 
Stop sulking and lighten up
Maybe a little bit jealous
What Diane said. She understands royal.
If she loves them it shouldn’t matter
Life is short; be happy.
I forget the days of my grandkids. I know the months. I adore all of them.
Get over it…It’s hurtful for sure,but don’t let it destroy you.
Barely get my own straight myself
You really need to get a life get over this it is childish
Sounds like my ex Mil. I feel your pain and so do my children
No please don’t be mad. She could be at the start of Dementia or Alzheimer’s. Our memories start to go when we get older. My mom passed away last June from Dementia. She didn’t remember her grandchildren and at the end she did not know her own children.
Be kind…Age changes all of us…
Gee what’s Bianca and Alexis’s middle name ? Lord I don’t know!! I do know their birthdays .
I suggest a little tolerance and grace for your MIL. She is your husband’s only Mother and if nothing else do it for him. Jealously and creating a scene doesn’t flatter you.
Seriously?! Are you that stupid ? It’s an old lady,just remind yourself this before being such a drama qeeun 
I think you are way too sensitive about this. Let it go.
Sad to hear this kind of stuff…but hubby’s mom always didn’t nice gifts for the girls kids cause it was girls daughter’s kids…she knitted Beautiful blanket for thier beds …but my hubby’s kids nothing O Hubby’s got money but my poor mouth daughter’s was a different story…I felt sorry for my girls …but that’s okay mine didn’t do with out from hubby and me…guess some are really dumb thinking or easily fooled
Big deal. I don’t know either of my granddaughters’ birthdays.
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If it upsets you as you say, just stay away.
My God. Is your name Karen by chance?
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Nope I forget my own kids names. Lol 
Yes you are crazy! Some people simply have a poor memory and you are far too sensitive to take such a minor thing so seriously. Perhaps your MIL is also in early stage dementia, in which case you are also cruel, so lighten up!
Mother-law’s loss!!!
I call my kids my dogs name . It happens, no big deal. We all make mistakes. Now, when I call my husband my ex’s name… not good. Lol 
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Life is too short. My husband passed away September 29,2018. We were together 28 years. His mother has dementia. I love her so much. We have always been close. I know it’s upsetting that she forgot their middle names but it’s not worth family drama. You’re husband loves his mom and you and shouldn’t have to choose between.
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Wow I think you are being really unreasonable and harsh , give her a break not everyone remembers everything. Don’t sweat the small stuff life is too short
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I am one of 9, and we average 3 children a piece, great- grands are coming on strong at least average 3 a piece. I would never expect my Mother to remember all the birthday’s of a growing tribe. Mom is 92, and we are thankfor for her still being with us. Since your and adult be thankful you still have her in your and your children’s lives.
My own mother regularly calls me by my other siblings names even though I’m the youngest. She has a vague idea of the month of our births AND SHE WAS THERE FOR THE BIRTHING AND DID MOST OF THE HARD WORK. You need to stop thinking your so important that she NEEDS to remember all these stupid little details. Boy I wish I had problems like this my life would be easy as FUCK. .
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I barely remember my own kids birthdays and my dad struggled with remembering his kids birthdays too( including mine). So I put important birthdays in my calendar on my phone that are auto repeated every year and notify me one week before, then one day before, then first thing in the morning on the day of.
I think a MIL should have a calendar similar to mine or on paper. I don’t think it’s terrible to forget them especially if there’s a lot of Family members in her life. And middle names? I only know the middle names of my parents, siblings, husband and children- no one else.
Maybe there’s a health issue, but remember the others cause she see them more
You can’t change anything . Why are you throwing fits? There is always more to the story. Seems that keeping score is not good for you.
Sorry but whats the question
Got nothing better to worry about? Sounds like you got a bee in your bonnet.
I’ve got 3 boys myself,they’re lucky if I get their name right on my 3rd attempt! let it go, life is do v v short. Xx
Mate toughin up, is this what you call a problem? A problem or an issue is if you can’t see or can’t hear , can’t walk etc. Frigin everyone has become petty and weak. Sorry but this shouldn’t even be advertised. Sad people.