My Mother-in-Law Told Me Baby Showers Were for “Broke People”

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QUESTION:

"My husband and I are expecting our first child, I have two from a previos relationship that he has claimed as his own…I want to have a baby shower since this is our first together and its been years since ive had a baby and i gave all my stuff to my sister…the issue is i found out thorugh my sister in law (who i love) that my mother in law was talking badly about baby showers claiming baby showers are for “broke people who cannot afford their own baby items”…and that her son “is probably broke because i just spend all day at home and do nothing with my life”(im on bedrest currently due to a hard pregnancy)…needless to say i dont think she likes me and now i feel like i should not having a baby shower…my sister in law wants to do it anyways but i dont want my mother in law to hate me even more…,y husband wants to do what makes me happy but also doesnt want to offend his mother…what should I do?"

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"Celebrities have baby showers. She’s just not a nice person…have the shower."

"She can butt the fuck out and stay in her lane!!"

"This is YOUR pregnancy and YOUR family. If your MIL doesn’t agree with the baby shower, then she doesn’t need to come. And if she’s going to treat you poorly over it, then she can choose to no longer be a part of your life. You need to live for YOU and YOUR family. Not your MIL and her opinion. Or anyone else’s, for that matter"

"Let your sister in law do it. She can either invite her mom or not… Your mother in law sounds like a real peach. She won’t be happy either way. I hope for your sake that your hubby is firmly on your side and sticks up for you to his mom."

"Baby showers are to celebrate the baby you’re having. Don’t let anyone else steal your happiness, you’ll only regret it."

"Do the baby shower. If you want one then do it. I only had two just for my boys who are 14 years apart."

"Its not about what your mother in law does or doesn’t want. Don’t let anyone control your life like that."

"Every baby deserves to be celebrated! You should absolutely have a baby shower and enjoy it!"

"Omg have one. Life is short, do not let someone like that steal your happiness and joy because you will absolutely regret it. A baby is a blessing and friends and family love celebrating and buying gifts. If she doesn’t like it, she doesn’t have to go."

"I wonder where people get these notions? Clearly she doesn’t live in the south where there’s a shower or party for EVERYTHING! Have your shower- your MIL is toxic- she can’t hate you any more than she already does - and having your shower or not won’t alter her already formed and set in stone decisions"

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