You shouldn’t have to do anything when you get home after a full day of work, if he’s at home he should be doing the house work & cooking, who’s paying for his weed habit if he doesn’t work? as above post says talk to him if he doesn’t listen let his mum have him
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Your MIL and your husband aren’t the normal ones. I’d pack and go, since I’m the only provider in this so-called family anyway. But that’s just me. Do what makes you happy, girl.
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Don’t put up with it.
Sorry but 3 years with in-laws, not good.
Sorry but your husband is a mummy’s boy.
For your own sanity, leave
Run. From him & your enabling mother in law. They’ll see when you’re gone, how much you did for your family.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My mother in law told me I am not a normal wife and my husband won't stick up for me: Advice?
why is ur husband not bothered to look for any kind of job
why is he sitting on his lazy ass acting like a bihhhhh instead of providing for his family?
he can’t even protect u from his venomous wicked mother.
get the hell out of there before u catch fire.
ps how u would get another baby with a deadbeat is a mystery to me nonetheless u can still escape.
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Run don’t walk, I’m telling ya…
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Time for you to leave
Kick the prick to the curb 
The real problem is that you’re his wife, and he’s not defending you. Also, he is obviously not respecting your wishes (Smoking cigarettes & weed, watching porn). I’m assuming y’all have talked about these things. So that’s just facts. 
Sure, he’s a stay at home dad. That’s been a thing for a while. If he actually takes care of the kids, cooks, cleans, and doesn’t just sit around, and that’s y’alls agreement, then that’s really a non-issue. Imho, this isn’t the '50s. If one parent is going to stay home, it doesn’t matter what gender that parent is, as long as the one that stays home is actually involved. But at the very least, there needs to be an intervention. If he’s not man enough to defend his wife, then chances are there are other problems.
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Trust yourself and get rid of these thankless ppl.
Save yourself. Get out
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That’s it, I’m Husband Shaming!
Fuck that lazy bitch
Say bye bye and move on
Sounds like a mommas boy that not matter what will not grow up
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After reading this I’m left thinking why is your kid being sent to your sister if he is a stay at home dad? Then I’m like well if your sister watches one why not both and your husband find work as well so you guys can get out of there and find a place of your own? Also how was he before you guys moved in with your in-laws? As someone who lived with my parents with my SO and 6month old i understand that can drive a big wedge in your relationship but the things he might be doing along with the MIL doing whatever she’s doing isn’t good for the kids. I’ve got so many questions still though cause there is other sides to the story but you guys definitely need to move either together or separately and get some sort of help cause you both seem really depressed and stressed out.
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I’m confused? Why doesn’t your husband care for the little one in addition to the 5 year old? If he is home all day, he should be watching the little one too. I personally don’t know why you’ve stuck around this long. If my husband were using drugs and smoking around my kids, that would be all I would need to leave. Add in the winner of a mother in law and the whole sending the little one away each day, that would seal the deal.
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Why doesn’t your man work?
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Now I am hoping I got this right, You live with your MIL, your husband has been home for for 2 yrs now, So just where was he before??? You work 7 days a wk & he does all the housework, Just why are you living with your in-laws for 3 yrs??? And working every day, you saved no money at all to get your own place??? I am so confused
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I stopped reading at " our youngest goes to your sisters to cut daycare costs" why? You are proving for all of them, your husband needs to take care of him, not watch him as it’s his kid too.
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Um why is the baby going to the sisters when dad is fully capable of watching his own kid??? Also, if you are working that many hours and cant afford your own place on your own you meed a better job! I know people first response is always to leave, but thats cuz its true! Quit putting up with all this crap from these boys. 
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Don’t know why you are still there. And why doesn’t he work? Why would you need a sitter if he doesn’t work?? Get out girl
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Why are you paying for daycare and taking them to your poor sisters when the dad doesn’t work? Sorry but time to cut him off the tit sis
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Soooo it sounds like to me that the husband takes all the money and does as he pleases am I right? This may be hard to do but you need to make it happen… Get a back bone and start saying NO you are the HOH in YOUR household take control and tell MIL to stay in her own lane. There is a reason when you get married you move out of parents houses and this is it right here! Lay down what exactly you expect out of your husband and and only a lot him so much money a week. if he does not do it after a month or two then you take your kids and and provide a better life. You can do it. Where there’s a will there’s a way! TAKE CONTROL
People suck and are selfish. Im demisexual and find this true across all genders and sexuality preference.
Leave him there are HUD housing that can help you get your owen place you don’t need a lazy as man that seames to be a mommy boy instead of being your husband
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I don’t know if MIL works, but if she doesn’t why does your husband not get a job and let her babysit. If she works also then I’m confused as to why you need a babysitter and daycare if your husband stays home. Living with in-laws you should have money saved up by now to move out. Especially with you working 12 hour shifts 7 days a week. Which I must admit is a little odd. This whole thing seems fucky to me 
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If she wanted you to be a “normal wife” then she should have raise her child to be a man
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Tell your husband he needs to go get a job…
Exactly how is he being a good role model for his kids and watching them if he has these new habits… Not too mention if money is tight he isn’t helping the cause and your just working your butt off. Also sounds like sure the mom doesn’t like but WOW how proud of a mom can she be watching her full grown son be the way he is.
I would look into other option, first always talk your problems over to see if there addressed before making bigger deals like moving, divorce etc …
Watching porn while he has a wife at work all day every day? Fuck him. Not acceptable.
What you allow will continue
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All move out of mother-in-law s get your own place you mite find you will be happier xx
Oh I feel your pain. It’s awful situation when husband can’t put you first when it comes to family
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Umm sounds like he’s a spoiled mommas boy. If someone said that about my husband family or not I would have a fit, same with my husband. I could see the baby going to his sisters for a few hours once a week or something but umm why isn’t he watching the child. If he can’t do that why isnt he working? Is he disabled or something? Also he is supposed to stand up for you against anyone momma or not. The family you create is the most important one of all.
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Sounds like she’s mad you didn’t choose the same path she did. ALOT of older women see it as shameful to leave your kids and go to work. Just continue to do what’s best for you. It’s your life, they don’t get to choose what you should do.
Your husband needs to grow up, leave his parents house, and be a husband to you. Not a normal wife?!! How can you be other than SuperWife when husband is is infantile, doing nothing for his family (you and the children, not his parents).
The husband hasnt been working for 2 years… why do you have daycare costs!!!
And why are you living with his parents. Move out and tell your husband to get a damn job.
Yikes!
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Girl sounds like hss dead weight and his mothers encouraging it. Might be time to go… and i know that finances and the idea of doing it on your own is scary. But girl ive been doing it myself for 11 years. If i can do it so can you. You cant be in toxic places and in toxic relationships and not expect to get poisoned. In the long run it will be better for you and the babies.
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Time to move on. If you are working 7 days a week 12 hrs a day where is your money going that you couldn’t afford it on your own?? How much are you paying to live with your mother in law?? Where there is a will there is a way. Move out and move on. If your husband want to live with mommy and be a lazy pos then let him. There is always a way
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I know exactly what you are going through. I’m divorced because of my ex devil in law. She hated me because I took her son from her. She led a violent crusade against me getting her whole side of her family and friends along with his friends with lies to hate me. She caused domestic violence between us and he did nothing but side with her through it all. She has now passed away and he’s a sad, lonely little boy with absolutely nobody because of her. And we didn’t even live with her and it was unreal the trouble she caused
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I’m thinking this situation is not a good situation for your children. Does MIL show any live to you children. Does their father? Are all as unhappy and stressed as you are? Who is taking time to live them then? Back vitbe up now. Go to a shelter is your have to, and get help to get our of this situation, for your sweet children’s sake.
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It sounds like you know your answer. I think you should apply for low-income housing in your area and move out asap with your kiddos! Leave the hubby with his mama since he seems comfortable living with his parents and having “backup” against you.
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You are doing everything any real woman would do love… be strong and you will make the right move
He needs to MAN-UP!..snip that apron string his mom has around his neck…otherwise sorry to say, HE’S no man.
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Ultimatum girl. Tell him Get a job and a place of your own or you do it on your own. You can get a place. It might not be the nicest house in town but you can get a place. It’s less stress out if they’re house and worrying over his habits!!! Run!
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Well his mother sounds like a dirt bag It sounds like her son is the selfish failure here
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You work from 6 to 6, 7 days a week and you can’t afford rent? Maybe you need a better job… And yes move out from your in-laws… There are resources like affordable housing… Plus if your kid is 5 She’s probably going to start Kindergarten in the fall… Your sister is already helping with the baby.
I think it’s time for you to start doing some research and realize that you have options and dump that family. I would not stay where I’m not wanted.
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You are working so many hours where is your money?? You should be able to rent on your own! Move on!!!
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Find a way to get you and your kids out of there…God bless and good luck!!
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Why isn’t he working too? He should be able to help financially so you can move away from MIL. You don’t need to have her talking nonsense - I don’t know what normal is. It’s sounding like you have a system that works but isn’t balanced. You need to your man child husband back on the same page as you. He’s not on vacation. He needs to step up too. Talk to him and maybe get couples counseling but you need to both be on a shared path and if you aren’t then counseling and maybe separation and divorce. You don’t need to kill yourself and be treated like an after thought.
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The son sounds like a wimp and a mooch. He needs to get a job. Mom needs to butt out. I had a husband like this too. He laid around and smoked weed and drinking all day and I eventually had to put my kids in daycare while I worked, even though my husband was home all day. I was so happy when I divorced him. We divorced 10 years ago and since then, he’s been living in his parents basement and drinking his life away and no longer has custody due to the drinking. Our lives are much better now. He had one job since our divorce that lasted two months at the liquor store I already raised my son and I don’t have time to raise my mother in law’s son. Life is much better now that he’s their problem
It’s never going to work living with someone else especially parents of either
You need to get out. Take care of yourself. Leave. Go to low income housing.
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Sounds like you don’t have a normal husband. Why isn’t he watching y’all’s baby??? You have to bring the baby to a sitter but the 5 year old can stay home? What the hell is that about? That sounds absurd. Why doesnt he work if you can’t live off just your paycheck? If you could afford it and he wanted to be a stay at home dad that’s different. But you can’t afford it so he needs to get a job first of all. Why does his mother expect you to work 7 days a week at work and home and then thinks her son in slaving away but he won’t even watch his own baby? What the fu+k??? What kind of man would sit home at his mommies house all day while his wife works to support him and send his baby to a sitter and sit around with his mommy and 5 year old there to watch porn and jerk off all day smoking and being a deadbeat??? Not a good one. Girl. Wtf. Who watches porn with their mom and child in the house in the middle of the day. She expects you to slave away but he’s good doing nothing? You come home and give him a break. You have to do everything where’s your break. Fuck all that. Your mil isn’t the problem your man is. Why would you have another child while still living with her? I know shit happens but that seems like a good reason to kick it up and get more money to move into your own place before the child was born. Your mil sounds bitter. Don’t say anything tho it’s her house she won’t change how she thinks no matter what you say or do. So don’t stir the pot if you can help it. If he won’t stick up for you he is a bum ass loser. He’s happy living like this and that’s scary. What kind of man would feel like a man when they won’t provide for his own family,? He needs to get a job so you can be a more normal wife and mother. Yeah duhh the mil is right. Your not a normal wife but whose fault is that? You’re a working wife. You’re a working mother. Your the soul provider how could you possibly have time for “normal” wife and mother things when you work so much. Her son ain’t a normal husband. And it’s just so freaking weird to me that he doesn’t watch the baby. Why? Why would he make you send his baby to a sitter when he’s home with the other child anyway. That’s crazu
Get the heck out of there.
Your husband sounds like a bum and his mom sounds toxic af! I would get the hell outta there. You need to step out of yourself for a minute and evaluate the situation.
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You need to be a couple in your own place and then see where it goes
Uhhh…you’re working 12hr shifts, going home and taking on mommy duties so he can “rest” after taking care of JUST your 5yr old (why can’t he keep the baby as well?), 7 days a week and his mom has nerve to call YOU lazy? 
While he sits home all day getting high, watching porn and obviously sucking his mama’s titty and can’t even defend you over the delusional and disrespectful things his mother is saying. Sis…do what you gotta do to pack it up and get away from these people. They sound toxic and narcissistic asf!
Get away from Mama and if her boy wants to stay, let her have him. It’s time for you to take care of you
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You’re in a mess. And that man child is sucking the life out of you.
You think you can’t make it alone? I think you’re mistaken.
You work a lot, and you didn’t name those kids alone.
Leave that house, you already don’t depend on him, find a place and file for child support.
He’s the one draining you, nothing worse than a man who doesn’t stand up for his wife.
Get rid of your mother-in-law out you marriage before it’s to late
Take your children and move out. You will find a way to make it work.
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In this talk it out and it takes two people to make a living .and move away from in-laws as soon as you can .
Leave. Go get your own place. You’ll be just fine
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Is the places in your town that rent to low income , You should check them out and also you could get food stamps if necessary. You do not need to be treated like a slave. Your husband should be working unless he is unable and there is help for that .
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Tell your man to sort his shit or you your your kids are leaving
Sorry this must be very painful for you. I would suggest an intervention — therapy, communication, and to build solid trust. If he can’t honor that then you need to walk away. As hard as it might be, in the end it will be worth it. For your mental and emotional health. You deserve better than this. Xo 
I had a mother in law like that. She made trouble until the day she died.
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Maybe she should be pissed at her son cuz he’s not working and you are. If you weren’t working such long hours you’d have more time with the kids.
Y o u n e e d y o u r o w n p l a c e ASAP .
I f y o u r h u s b a n d d o e s n o t w o r k
t h e n h e s h o u l d k e e p t h e k i d s a n d c l e a n h o u s e a n d w h i l e t h e y
n a p h e c a n r e s t. I t i s n o t y o u r
M I L b u s i n e s s. S h e i s t r y i n g t o m a k e y o u l o o k b a d. W h y d o e s s h e n o t t e l l h e r s o n t o g e t a j o b a n d t h e n y o u w o u l d n o t h a v e t o w o r k a s m u c h a n d c o u l d d o m o r e a t h o m e. I t s e e m s p r e t t y m u c h o n e s i d e d. Wr i t e d o w n s t u f f a n d k e e p a r e c o r d e v e r y t i m e s h e b a d m o u t h s y o u. Y o u c a n g e t s o m e h e l p. I f y ou r h u s b a n d d o e s n o t w a n t t o m o v e, t a k e t h e k i d s a n d g o. Y o u a r e t h e b r e a d w i n n e r i n y o u r f a m i l y a n d d o n o t h a v e t o p u t u p w i t h t h e i r m e n t a l a b u s e.
Put hubby to work. U never stated he was disabled. Have a talk with him. If he won’t help then leave .who buys his cigarettes and weed. Don’t do it. U enable him to be worthless by supporting him.
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She’s projecting bc her son is a loser. You guys need to move out ASAP.
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You need to move into your own place without the mother in law and with or without the husband. Talk to your husband and figure it out. To be honest it sounds like you already know what you need to do
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What a mess. Find a way to get support from you family and move out of there immediately. Even a studio apartment would be better than that.
EW TO ALL OF THIS 
sounds like he and his mom deserve each other & you deserve an actual husband and a better environment.
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I am telling you from experience it will only get worse. It took me 14 years before I realized I had to get out and how truly damaging him, his mom were to me and my children. And his mom didn’t live with us but she still was a huge problem that never went away. Even after I left she was still a huge problem and he still is because we have kids together. Thankfully I do not have to live with it and I am now happily married to the most amazing MAN ever.
If he were actually taking care of your kids and keeping house he wouldn’t have time to smoke weed and watch porn. Tell him to move in with mom, when you serve him papers and proof of your temporary custody papers. Since you’re the one working. And then coming home to take care of everything else, he’s not worth keeping. You don’t need this crap!
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This is easy. It’s called divorce. I’ve done three by myself. After the first, you get the hang of it
Set your boundaries and ask yourself what do you need. Get a child minder part time. And find something you like. Swimming, yoga,dance,movies. You need time to process your feelings and love yourself again.
Boundaries…You don’t need any of them around you if they’re a burden in your life.
Your mother Iin law is his mother,not your family.
F**** her out firstly
Then breathe
Then go again and ask yourself what makes you happy. When mommy is happy,so is the baby
Pack up and leave his ass there. Why does he need to rest, if you’re working 7 days a week? Why does one child go to your sisters instead of both of them staying home with their father since hes home?? The longer you put up with it, the worse its gonna get!! Get out fast…
Sounds like u got another kids on ur hands. My question is why does the baby go to your sisters to cut cost if their father is home. He should be helping save money there. This might be one of those mother in laws that just wants her son to be a man baby and won’t like any other woman in his life.
Talk to him…. Take him for a drive… lock the doors and let him know, things have to change… If that’s not what he wants you will see by actions and if it is you will see… reminder he is human and being home I’m sure has broken a pride thing with him, being a Man and you need to listen also… It’s not just your happiness it’s Both…. Team work makes the dream work kinda thing… Best of luck… Action brings changes….remember that! Listen to some Tony Robbins and God….
I think you should save up to get your own place. Shame on your husband for not sticking up for you. And his mother may never like you. So don’t even waste your time there. My mom and dad have been married for over 30 years and till this day my grandmother and aunts (6 of them) don’t like my mother. And all these years my mom has tried to get along with them but I have seen for myself how they are with her. And it breaks my heart because they are my blood family. But my mother comes first. So we distance ourselves from them. My advice since you already doing all the work. Get your own. You will be much happier. Living with in laws for a long time can be very stressful and I know from experience.
Tell him to shape up or ship out! As for your MIL, u don’t need to listen to her crap!
Best off without them all by the sounds of it, sounds like youre the one that does everything
Run ! Don’t walk away ! Run ! I feel like your being used ! Working 12 hours everyday! You need a break for yourself. I’d plan to leave. I’m sure your family and friends would help ! I couldn’t live that way. You need to find you again. You are a strong woman to do everything you do. You know already what needs to be done. Run ! Get your life and happiness back. You can do it. Nobody should have to put up with this. Used and abused! Run !
How do you work 7 days a week, 12 hour shifts and can’t afford to move?
kick him to the curb and smack the mother in law
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Run as fast and far as you can take your children the Lord will make a way trust him I did and never ever looked back .
As a Male individual, I would advise you to stay the course until the youngest child is at least 18 months old (if this is not too much of a stress problem for you), during this time, if mr. Wonderful has not made any attempt to get a job and contribute to family matters, leave!
I trust that you start saving a few dollars each week and networking with your friends and family about living arrangements. Also it might be a good idea to contact children and family services for directions on receiving aid while preparing to live alone while working and raising your children (mr. Wonderful may still be unemployed).
These are my thoughts. Good luck
Sounds like a lazy bone idol sponger with no pride or morals ! I’d be off simple … leave him with mummy & let her buy his weed he’s taking the absolute piss out of you . Why is your sister looking after your child if he’s at home all day ?
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Take your kids and leave them too see to them selves. You don’t need all that negative energy in your life. it sounds like you need to kick both of them to the kerb
Run out with your children as fast as you can!
Leave him and his mammy right there miserable together! 
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KK. Seriously this can’t be real. But if it is and you are looking for advice…you must be on crack… Leave …
She is jealous of the bond between you and the hubby…even if they didn’t get along growing up…its her baby and nobody is better than her…been there done that…god rest her soul…( mine passed 3 years ago) . kind to my face but if her and her son disagreed I was the reason or if they were arguing she would throw my name it saying something bad…well tried…my husband has always stuck up for me to his family…he put me first not her…
Start by moving on your own
Crazy dudes like this exist, get a job clown
Get your own.place move out