I would not want either one of them at my wedding
This is simple it is your life so you have your wedding you invite who you want to she can come or not come and they can all f*** off
This is why my man and I are ELOPING. A bunch less stress
I would say to the mil. Its our wedding come if you want or stay away… If you want… And leave the nasty sister at home she is not welcome… And after you get married think about moving to the other end of the country… Away from nasty family…
I had the MIL from hell. She tried everything to separate us, even trying to get my fiancé put in jail! My dad, fiancé & I all went to her house together to invite her to the wedding. She didn’t come. We got married anyway, as it’s our life, not hers. She told everyone she could tell that we never invited her to the wedding. When I heard it, I set people straight & invited them to ask my dad if it was true. Over time, she got over it, though she still hated me. The only thing that made that better was me having children, but she only tolerated me, never fully embracing me as her DIL. She died of cancer about 20 years later, so I no longer have her disapproving glare to put up with at holidays. Thing is, you have to establish your right to make your own decisions & what kind of life you want. Also, your future husband must be at & on your side in these decisions too & stand up to his family. If there is going to be drama that sucks the life out of your wedding day, then you both have to do whatever it takes to make that not happen. This is YOUR day, not theirs. You don’t have to invite people you don’t want around. Why have someone around who will more than likely stir up trouble on the happiest day of your life? After my wedding, my husband’s grandma asked us to stop at his mother’s house. Since my sister was driving (we were sitting in the back, enjoying the hooting horns), she drove past MIL’s house & hooted the horn. That’s all MIL got. She chose to stay home & boycott our wedding. Tough cookies. When your kids leave the nest, they are old enough to make their own choices, independent of your wishes. They are individuals, not little robots that do your bidding. When you & your intended get married, you become one. When anyone treats you badly, it’s as if they treated both of you badly. Stand up for your right to start your life your way…drama-free. Oh…we’re still married…to each other…43 years strong.<*)))><
Your husband to be is a grown man and it is his wedding too, you both should make that decision jointly and inform your MIL together as a team that will not be divided on whatever you decide. It is both your special day, it is not their day. Your MIL is a grown woman and can make her own decisions, prayers for you all.
Ask your fiancé if it’s really that important that his mom is there. Let him make that call. If he says he doesn’t want the sister there at all then let him tell mom she is going to miss a beautiful wedding.
It’s his mother’s choice whether to attend the wedding or not. Invite the m-i-l…NOT the sister. If mom doesn’t attend, it’s her loss.
His family would have to go to hell. They wouldn’t be ruining my day because his sister wants to act an ass. She seems like it’s always about her and your wedding day would be no different.
What does your fiancé say? If he wants his Mother there, you might have to include the sister. If she starts trouble at the actual wedding, then ask her to leave or have security remove her.
Suck it up and invite them. It’s a couple of hours. Either that or elope. Pretty sticky situation but ultimately not MIL’s wedding
It’s YOUR wedding!! The guest list is yours to make! It is indeed sad that your Mother-in law wants to be so controlling, domineering and at the same time CHILDISH!! Do what YOU and your fiance think is right and she can come or not…HER CHOICE!!
I would tell your mil that I’m sorry but you will not be inviting your sil. If she wishes to not attend then it’s her loss. I would not invite someone I don’t want there
Kill them with kindness… they may behave just out of shock
Let her stay home. It’s your wedding. Your special day. She has no right to make demands.
Enjoy your day without all the drama. But let your fiance do the inviting or not.
I’m with the mil that’s his sister his blood . This is only a one sided post so ppl really can’t see it all.
It is your day. Do what YOU WANT TO DO
My former MIL is racist… two of her daughters caused fueds. FIL came to k own the truth of the situation, his daughters are liars. He personally apologized to me. She sat in her vehicle. When we got married he asked his dad to be best man. Dad asked him if he told his mother we were getting married. He hadn’t… Dad said he would but Joe had to tell his mom. He went to his parents house said I’m getting married, Dad is best man and you’re not invited. His mother did not come to the wedding, only his dad did. It wasn’t until 2 yrs later when we were having our first daughter before she spoke to me.
I wouldn’t be surprised if he decides you are the most important woman in his life.
It’s your wedding so…
Toxic people. . Leave them out! They won’t change and besides its your wedding and you can invite who the hell you want!!!
Don’t Be bullied…It’s Your Day , not Hers ! CONGRATULATIONS
Tell dear sweet Momshe needs to grow
Shame on the MIL for acting that way. It seems like some parents are in denial about their children’s poor behavior. Which sounds like it just perpetuates the sister’s toxicity. I too have parents that are only happiest when everyone is together…even if the other family members are extremely toxic. They excuse the behavior because they are " family." Bullshit. Some people just love stirring pots. And it sounds like the sister isn’t happy unless she is stirring the pot. The day belongs to the bride and groom. Screw the other family members who can’t even act respectful for one damn day out of the year. Love and honor those who show up to your wedding to give their love and support. Have a great day!!!
Tell them to go to hell
Justice of the peace and a nice honeymoon, them
Dear Dearly…hope this is a joke…tell the M-I-L to go f— herself
Tell her it’s all good she doesn’t come. You still getting married
Short n sweet your wedding invite who you want.
Send her a video and pics!! Lol … Signed
Wish you were here!!!
Ask hubby, it’s hos family.
Tell her to fuck right the hell off. She is entitled to NOTHING when she treats you so poorly. I’m having a similar fight.
Simple send his parenys
Tell her to stay home
Tell MIL to ##&? Off
Tell her that’s her choice. You’re not going to invite a drama queen who’s only going to end up starting shit.
So your MIL is okay with blackmailing you and your fiance? That should be enough for both of you to not want them around. It’s your wedding, not hers. I’d tell her nice try, but to F off. It’s not always easy, especially with family, but I hope your fiance is strong enough to walk away too. MIL is extremely entitled to be trying to make demands like that and be manipulative. Self respect and self love is way more important than toxic family members. It will only make your wedding a shit day, full of fighting. Not worth it.
Tell her, “although we’d really love you to be there, we respect the fact you have to do what’s best for you.”
This is the best way I can say it without telling you to tell the MIL to bite your fat ass. Nobody will hold my wedding hostage with their list of demands. No one.
Fuck them. Have the wedding for you
Never negotiate with terrorists
Sounds like i know exactly where the sisters attitude and sense of controlling entitlement came from. Sounds like some of his family cnt respect yalls boundaries.
No one is ruining my wedding day, being dramatic or causing a scene but this is a decision you and your partner have to make TOGETHER. How does he feel?
Ultimatums are insulting and an attempt to control you and your husband.
As painful as it will be for your husband if his parents don’t go this event and day is about you and him becoming one and should be a happy event.
I would invite the MIL and say clearly that after multiple attempts to calmly interact with the sister it is clear that there’s no way sister will be respectful and supportive therefore she’s NOT going to be invited to the wedding.
We love you and would be honored for you to share our special day with us and if you can’t respect our wishes and choose not to attend that will be heartbreaking for us. We will respect your decision however this day is Not about you or your daughter it’s our wedding and we want it to be about our love for each other and we want to be surrounded by family and friends that love and support our marriage.
I cant get pass the using your baby’s photos on dating profiles…do not invite her
Sounds like his family is toxic as all hell…I would think about this very hard.
Then Looks like she’s not going. Oh well. You don’t need to please anyone on your day. My mil tried this and she didn’t come.
Stand your ground! It sucks for your partner but you need to stand your ground or it will get worse.
Then she won’t be there…I would never let anyone try to get their way w me like that. My mom said if I didn’t invite my thief brother to my daughter’s 1st day party, she wasn’t coming. Ok. She didn’t come n I didn’t care…and oddly enough her n I are close and my brother is dead now. So…
That’s her choice. Chances are if you invite the sister, she will likely ruin YOUR day. That would be a nope for me! And MIL decides not to come, that’s her loss.
I guess it’s up to your fiance if he really wants to go through with the wedding right now without his mother being there . I would go through with it though if he was fine with it .
First talk it over with your fiancé about his mother. You fiancé may secretly hold it against you if his mother doesn’t show up. Later on this will creat problems for you. A Wedding has to be nice for both of you without stress.
So. When I got married I didnt invite my sister because of some drama. My grandmother didn’t come because I didn’t invite my sister which meant my neices and nephew, nor my mom were able to come. 6 years later, I wish all of them had been at my wedding. Including my sister. It was a mistake I can never fix because my mom has since passed away. Yes, its your wedding and your decision but families make up sometimes and then you have regrets. You and your fiance are the only ones that can make this decision.
Call her bluff see if she really will stay away or is she all talk her loss not yours I say
To bad your having to deal with this. Do what’s decided between you and your soon to be husband and he tells the MIL that it’s his wish as well as yours.
I hope you understand you are marrying into a great deal of pain and difficulty. We do marry
“The family,” of our spouse. I hope you love each other very much and realize this toxic family will tear that apart, without strong commitment to each other. And God. You will certainly need Him to make it work. You may think they will not impact your marriage but they certainly will. You have serious decisions to make.
If your new husband is incapable of standing up to his mother and sister then don’t marry him. You are setting yourself up for a lifetime of emotional blackmail and verbal abuse. He needs to stand firm with her and demand that this drama be kept away from your happy day.
The MIL is making that decision not you. If she chooses not to attend that is her choice. You need to do what is best for you and your significant other. I truly believe that if the sister came there would be more drama and that is not what you need on your day.
Your wedding, invite who you want!
I didn’t invite a family member (that everyone has a problem with) and when she asked my mom about if I mailed out the invites yet, I told my mom to tell her “Everyone whose supposed to get an invitation has received it!”
Don’t have either of them there. It’s your wedding day. You and your fiancé need to figure out if you want a good day or an uncomfortable day. The mil is purposely doing that and giving you an ultimatum. I know it’s probably going to suck that his parents won’t be there but it’s really not worth it. It’s supposed to be a happy day and all about the couple getting married. Not about drama. Don’t invite someone if you don’t want them their.
Nope. Stick to your guns. If she doesn’t show, the show will still go on and she gets to miss her child’s wedding because she’s childish.
Elope with your kids. Find a great venue a long way away and have fun as a family. Save all that money for the kids education or house or new car…wharever makes you happy. Best wishes
I will adamantly say, invite the sister so you can have the wedding your husband wants. Always take the high road in any situation. Trust me, I am 82 years old and have lived through it all. Just be cordial and you will be beautiful and not live to regret it.
Tell your MIL you hope she enjoys looking at the pictures from your wedding then. No one dictates your guest list but you and your soon to be husband.
It’s your wedding not hers if she doesn’t come that’s her problem hope you have a nice wedding
I had it out with my mil before the wedding because she wanted to handle the money and pay the catering hall It was our money not hers. She was pissed because I wouldn’t back down. I said it’s traditional for the brides parents to pay for the wedding Since we were paying ourselves we both saved the money. He sent his to hiss mother to save I got my way but she didn’t talk to me a d wore a silver dress with a black hat which ruined the pictures. In the long run things turned around and I was the one who took care of her when she got really ill not the dil who lived next door. Hold your ground. Don’t give in. Good Luckto you both
Your wife needs to decide which choice will serve her best. My three children have had no contact for years and never were nice but it could mean her mom stays home. This sets the boundaries for your married life! But do you cave in to the mom? Do now,always be expected to give in. She must decide! Peace PrincessM
It’s your day not hers. And if the momma can’t see she’s toxic then momma may have to go to.
Your fiancé needs to make this decision. It’s his family.
Sounds like control by manipulation and intimidation. It’s YOUR wedding…do what you choose to do.
It’s your wedding. You can invite whoever you want. Still invite your future MIL, but if she doesn’t go, that is on her.
Sounds like a big mess. Take the wedding money and elope to anywhere in the world. Why put up with such craziness?
Starting a marriage with problems…It is not going to last…Sorry. The mom, sis and your fiance are blood related and you are not. The problem will go on and on. The fiance for now can say whatever to please but he is not going to be happy with the relationship. You will be between devil and deep sea
Have a very small wedding and don’t tell anyone till after it’s your special day keep them all out
Its your wedding if they don’t want to come its okay its up to them !!!You are right not to invite her !!!
Guess that’s 2 less you have to pay for. Just because someone is family doesn’t mean they deserve a seat at your table.
sounds to me as if you already are living together so what is the big deal about a wedding --to me it sounds as if you are creating drama where none should exit Yes, I am old and yes, I am old fashioned but it should go like this --date - marry - have kids - then deal with the drama.----------------------and no, I don’t need nasty comments ----I will stand by the fact that you should marry before having kids --my opinion and I stand by it.
I would not invite people . It is supposed to b a happy day not something to worry about
Have you talked to your honey about this? What does he have to say? It is his wedding to. Sounds like your about to be MIL and SIL need to grow up. I wouldn’t invite anyone like to my wedding and tell my MIL not to come then. Yes, weddings is about family and people coming together, but at the risk of might having to call 911? Not worth it. Also you did mention that your future SIL told your fiance that he was dead to her. Tell that to the MIL and ask, how can a dead person send out an invite to a wedding? I wouldn’t have booze at the wedding either, because that can add fuel to a fire.
Nope nope nope. If you start this pattern, she is going to continue to use ultimatums to show you who is in control which is ridiculous.
This is up to your future husband. His family, his decision.
Your wedding is just that. YOUR WEDDING. It’s your and husbands special day. It’s a beautiful time for the two of you.
Elope. It your wedding.
Mom just wouldn’t come and the wedding would go on. She wouldn’t force me into any relationship with his sister , who has disrespected me or our relationship
It’s YOUR wedding—Do as YOU PLEASE!!!
Give them the finger and elope…
To hell with the mother-in-law and his sister. Elope and spend the wedding money on a extended honeymoon.
She’ll get over it, u do u.
What a ridiculous Mother.
I would invite her and try making peace.If that doesn’t work you have done all that you need to.Remember you are not marring her you both have to make your marriage a wonderful blessing.you have no control over no body but your own house.