Wow cut her off shes toxic she is yout mum she is supposed to br on your side…
This is horrible you poor thing. I would maybe ask my ex and his new wife not to come since it’s my family but at the same time you need to tell your mom like“what the hell ? I’m your child not him”. I feel so bad for you.
Hurt people, hurt people!! Love her and forgive her. Maybe she’s got wounds? Maybe you’re relationship is fractured, never the less, family does not break up with family. Go be you. Let her be her and love each other regardless of your broken expectations. Have boundaries yes! But life is too short to disown your family. For God’s sake be patient, and prayerful and don’t solicit advice from this hateful broken world!! What advice would Jesus give you? Love your momma
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Right now is when you say enough is enough. Free yourself from the toxicity.
Girl be done with her period and how did you find out he was invited?
Do you usually just show up at your Mom’s or do you get an invitation?
How did you find out? Did your ex tell you?
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Sorry. Toxic. Move on. Nobody needs that especially from your mom.
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Are you that stupid…the writing is on the wall…your mother doesn’t want you…
I have a mother that I love, but she is a troublemaker, a narcissist and hates the truth. She commented on an old picture of me. All I said was…Mama, that is an old picture. I don’t look like that anymore. Moving to Alaska has depressed me , missing my kids and grandchildren.
She literally unfriended me and told my sister that it was a smear against her! 
My mother is crazy. I just don’t deal with her. If she wanted to be a real mother, then she would act like one.
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I think it is time you tell yourself she is not your job. Wash your hands and be happy.
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I just say to stay away for your own sanity…take no calls…make her go to you to see whats up.
Wow that’s blown my mind. I can’t even believe his new wife is ok with it. Sounds like she doesn’t even have any respect for you and although it’s really sad sometimes you’ve got to walk away from people that hurt you even if they’re family x
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I feel that there is ALOT OF IMPORTANT INFORMATION missing. Moms don’t just make moves like this.
Just simply pray!! It’s your mom 
, and someday she will be gone and you will mourn her and wish you could have done something different. Don’t give up!!
Unfortunately moms can be toxic. Cut her off.
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Where is this lady so I can invited her to my Thanksgiving. I feel her pain.
Just leave it be. If you weren’t invited dnt go. Just have the best holidays you can
Run! Shes not caring about you
Call the Ex & ask him to decline. Then have a come to Jesus with your mom👊
Ewww who’d want to go to their husbands ex wife’s mothers for thanksgiving anyways. Feel bad for all of them! Sounds like a sad bunch
Wow, that’s not right. Beyond toxic.
Ignore them all-do you really think they care what you have to say-absolutely not😱
Enough is now ! Simple - walk away! Xx
U Allready said enough is enough!
Sounds like you have to be done! 
Look yeah she’s your mother but just because your marriage didn’t work out doesn’t mean your parents stopped caring about him. So to that aspect grow up and get over it. As for the aspect of your mom, well not every mother is great, while she’s not perfect I’m sure you’re not either. So either forgive and move on about the past or stop trying to have a relationship with her. You don’t always have to be close with them even though they are your parents
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Time to cut ties. Family is no excuse to let them keep hurting you. I did that with some of my family. Years went by before they realized their behavior was hurtful. Some apologized and amended our relationship. Others are still in denial. Maybe cutting her out for a while will open her eyes. That also says a lot about him and his wife. Theres no excuse to be with your ex in laws unless you have kids.
Middle finger to your mom, sis!
Toxic!!! … walk away you can’t fix her
Find forgiveness, for both your mother and yourself. Do. NOT wait until she have dementia, like I did.
You can still love someone arm length away.
You don’t have to like or even love people simply because you share the same bloodline. That is such a misconception in life. I always imagine if I wasn’t related to this person would I be friends with them? And if the answer doesn’t come right away or if you simply say you wouldn’t, then why live your life in a way that makes you miserable. Find your own “family” and be content and happy with them!
Time to walk away as awful as it sounds.
This would be my Mom lol.
Don t attend the meal send the message by not showing up.
Nope id be cutting all of them off
Simple if you have kids call her and say you won’t be seeing the grandkids until you stop having my ex around
Join the FB group Daughters of Abusive Mothers.
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Move on. She made her choice.
Wow, I’m so sorry. It sounds like your mother wanted to keep you dependent. You are a strong and vital young person. Celebrate that!!! This really stinks. Sometimes our blood relatives hurt us. Let her keep your ex and new wife. Plus she doesn’t ask you??? Personally, as much as my feelings were hurt I’d suddenly have the most full, living and busy life. Thanksgiving? Oh have a great time but I’m busy with…Let this make you even stronger. Sometimes we have to give up hoping our parents will be how we want them to be but instead, they stay how they truly have always been.
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You don’t want to go. You want your Mom to have loved you enough to invite you. Your pain/conflict comes from wishing she loved you more.
Realize it’s not you. Hard to hear, but you can’t be good enough to fix this, because it’s your mom’s inability to love. You are ok now! You will be ok.
Girl enough is enough a LONG time ago. Time for you to prove your in dependence and throw your family in the trash and make your own with people who give a damn about you.
You even tried family therapy. You TRIED… you’ve tried talking and get a door thrown in your face. Ugh. Family can be the worse.
Toxic is toxic and you should not be involved with such! If you live in middle Tennessee and would like a comfortable place to go send me pm. You are very welcome! 
There are three sides to every story. Her’s, her moms and the truth. How do you know her mother caused the issue? Just by what she wrote here? There’s more to this than she’s saying so…
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It would hurt much less if she had punched you in the mouth…move on
You don’t say a word. You go live a great life.
When your mom’s in a nursing home, or at home needing help, with no hate in your heart…you will be living your life. There is Universal Accounting. You are not in charge of the life account book.
I’m 77, and had 9 years of therapy, and finally learned that my father’s hurtful, mean behavior had nothing to do with me.
Would it hsve been nice to have a Hallmark Card kinda dad? Absolutely! Did I deserve a Hallmark Card dad? For sure.
I had to learn it was not that I was not lovable. He could not love. I knew how he was rised. You know how your mom was raised. Of couse YOU deserve better, sorry, but this mom is what you got this time.
When my dad was in a nursing home in Indianapolis I was told folks said: He has an only daughter. She has not seen him for 30+ years.
They were correct. He missed his spectacular grandsons and grest-grandchildren. He missed having HIS family.
We were fine. Life wrnt on.
I sat down to quietly reflect on his death after a cousin called to say he had died. I realized not 1 single thing changed in my life. I was ok before I knew he died. I was ok after I knew he died. Life went right on.
Create a loving, caring family for yourself. Live your best life.
Let the dream that you can make it better… go. Be happy.
I have come to be grateful for my father. Without his cruelty I eould never have had to learn forgiveness. So, he gave me a gift.
The opposite of love is indifference. Once you have no feelings one way or the other then your free! If you stay in turmoil your still “hooked” by Mom’s abuse. Work on letting go. Stress causes dis-ease.
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Time to cut the ties… unfortunately it sucks shes your mom and u wish shit was different but u need to take care of u first say goodbye to toxic ppl. I’m 27 I cut my mom off 18months now she missed my wedding and my whole pregnancy of baby 2 and its been nice but they’re are moments I wish my mom was a better person but remember your mental health is more important 
I was having trouble with my parents lots of hurt . I ended up sitting down and writeing a letter . Telling them I loved them but I couldnt come around I had to love them from afar and I forgave them and explained to the my conflits so to speak and gave it to them . They read it told me I was full of shit and it was years before they came around
The Sisterhood: Daughters of Narcissistic and Abusive Mothers is a good page. Might help you feel a little better 
Follow Dr Laura ! She has great advice!
Prayers to you & your family for healing
My advice probably isn’t the best- I’d flip my shit and let her know all the business. She’d decide if she wants to get her shit together or have that chick as a daughter
It’s okay to say bye 
- there’s no reason you need to be disrespected continuously because your mom is a bitch … Arrivederci Mamacita
Some moms are pieces of shit. You just move on.
Fuck that you can come to my family’s thanksgiving!
That’s enough. 
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Enough is enough!
Do your own holidays , look forward not backwards!!
Start your own traditions !
Don’t call don’t show up & if you do show up. Wear something to dinner that’ll make them all blush.
Disrespect is disrespect. It doesn’t matter how you dress it.
Enough is enough now! Cut ties
You need to stay home and make your own dinner,your own dinner plans. Your mother can invite who she want but you don’t have to like it. Why would you want to go there anyway.
Clearly he has not really moved on and his new wife is just like because I for sure as new wife wasn’t going with him. That is his past not mine. At some time you have to cut off toxic people even if it is family .
Hold your lane you don’t need them. Maybe she is protecting you from Covid and you dont even know it
Speaking from experience, blood is not thicker than water. Unfortunately, sometimes you just have to let go.
Why would you even want to go if she treats you like that. Be strong and respect yourself. Stop living for her, live for you
Cut your ties with her. It will take time to heal but you will be better off without the hurt she is causing you.
You can’t pick your family but you can realize who has your back and who does not. Mother or no mother she has drawn A Line in the Sand. Loyalty is everything no matter who it is. She is not loyal to you, what else do you need?
Cut that toxic mother out of your life. You’re going to enjoy the freedom of not being held emotionally hostage just because the woman gave birth to you.
Your life…enjoy it❣
Walk away, i had a mother like that too, you already know the answer, you dont have to do shit for anyone that treats you like shit ,period, family or not.
Let it go!! do your own make it your family and stay away from her
Its her house she can invite whoever she wants.Settle your differences with your mother before its too late
she’s toxic! don’t go and make your own memories!! how someone can do that is beyond me!!
Just cut her off completely from your life n wash your hands of the toxicity
That sounds really toxic to me. If she invited him and the new wife along with you then I can see that as building bridges if there are children involved. But it doesn’t sound like there are any children involved and she didn’t invite her own daughter which plainly says to me that she wants to intentionally hurt you. TOXIC! Dont be a part of it. Remove yourself from trying to get your mother’s approval.
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Just walk away you have no time for toxic people trust me you will have more energy and fill alive again you make you happy and take care of you because if not you are not good to you and won’t be the best you that you can be God bless you got this
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Cut your losses and move on b4 you have permanent damage from her! Harsh words, but sometimes the truth is a hard pill to swallow. Good luck love.
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If you have done all that you can to mend the rift to no avail, she’s made her choice. As difficult as it seems you have to accept that sad reality and move on with your own life. Build a new life and have your own holiday, cut ties and let her come to you, it may never happen but at this point you have no choice.
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She’s doing it to get response from you. Cut her out permanently
Damn that’s harsh don’t go it is her house but I’d be pissed off and I’d let her know it
Just don’t bother with her. Enough is enough. Your ex husband and his new wife will have their own families to see, when they tell her no, she’ll come asking. That’s when you tell her you are planning on thanksgiving at your house for your single friends.
Maybe she just assumes your coming? In my husbands family divorce doesn’t mean you’re not family anymore and the person with the problem can stay home? When I married in my entire family was invited because they didn’t want me to have to choose. My ex husband stays the night with us when he comes to visit so our daughter he rarely sees has to feel uncomfortable or be put in middle. I’ve been remarried and my husband adopted our daughter and we just do what’s best.
I had a difficult relationship with my mom my entire life and just lost her two weeks ago. None of that matters anymore. Family is family.
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I didn’t tell her, I just stopped calling or visiting. That was 6 years ago. Not only have I not initiated any contact since, she hasn’t even bothered to pick up the phone herself to call me. Eh, her loss.
When you’ve had enough you will know…that is for certain. I hate that you got done so dirty! That being said you can love the “sinner” but hate the “sin”…meaning you can still love your Mom but you don’t have to like her ways!!! I agree with these folks, if she did this to you it’s a clear sign she wants to hurt you for whatever imagined reason. So just stay away. No text, no calls, block her from all social media and let her figure out if she wants you in her life. If she does, she’ll change. If not, you DON’T need that negative energy in your life. You can still love her in your heart but you DON’T have to have her in your life! Peace and positive energy being sent to you by me!!! 
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Just tell her your done move on don’t let it define u you move on a continue your life ifu have done all u can then it is now up to her and the x and new wife invited for Thanksgiving that’s a no brainier She sure not putting you first so sorry hope she comes around before it’s to late.
I am so sorry. It is very hurtful. But I’m a firm believer to lead by example of how you SHOULD be treated. I think you should go to Thanksgiving even if you don’t get that invitation. You should show up with a big ‘ol smile and a big ‘ol pie. And you should personally cut them all a big ‘ol slice of that pie with that beautiful smile because you are the one in charge of your feelings. Their choices don’t determine your responses. Shame on them… and if all else fails, spit in the pie 
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You have a one sided relationship. If your mother does not contribute to the relationship then do not keep contact with her. If she needs you she will contact you. You can respect her but not be a floor mat. What loving mother would want a relationship with someone not related to her over her child?
I had a VERY TOXIC mother and after a lifetime of forgiving evil, vile, selfish behavior. I simply changed my number and refused to allow her to be anything more to me than a birth giver. Since then I’ve been at peace. YOU don’t need to tell her anything your actions will speak for themself. I wish you peace, love and happiness through your life free of someone who would intentionally do things to upset and hurt you.
Its time to run. My own experience and a great counselor taught me that the longer you put up with the pain tge deeper it runs. You may be sad and hurt deeply at first but you’ll be amazed at how much sweeter life is when you don’t have someone ruining every day for you. Its her issue, not yours and you deserve a good life without her draining it out of you.
You will know when you have had enough and you sound like you have had enough, but only you can tell yourself that only you can tell yourself to walk away from a toxic relationship, do what you think is best for you
Depends on situation. My ex in-laws always include me in things as mum to their grandsons/nephews (1 of which is not ex partner son -but theirs since day he was born.we have great relationships.every one has right to invite who they want to their homes.
I am sorry you have a bad relationship with your mother. And I understand you are angry and hurt by her, any one would feel the same. She is your mother, and sad to say but its time for you to move on. By inviting your ex and his wife to dinner says a lot about her, even if you had been invited its still wrong of her to do that. Shes not considering your feelings. I would never do that to my daughter no matter how much I liked my son-in-law. Its just not right. You’ve done what you could to fix your relationship with her, now stop. Its time to concentrate on you, leave her in your past. Move on to better things. Shes negative energy that will just drag you down.
I have been in that exact same situation not with my mom she is my best friend but my husband mom she plays so many mind games she has not liked me since day one I been with my husband almost 16 years and she has even went to the extent to call and text my husband ex and tell lies give her my husband number but that is clearly just a game your mom is playing she is doing it to piss u off everyone knows if your divorced that it is ok to have a relationship with the ex to a point but at the end of the day family is family and clearly that doesn’t mean anything to ur mom but the best thing is to not try and not care at all live your life and don’t talk to her about things in ur life and don’t act like it bothers u and if she wants to change she will if not there is nothing u can do I have gotten to the point with husband mom to not care or play into it and when she has tried saying stuff to me I continue to say I don’t care and if ur not going to change then stay away from me and my family there is only so much you can do
I feel you on this. My mom still wishes my ex husband happy birthday, but not even my kids… I’ve had to completely cut ties with her. She brings drama and toxicity, and I’m not okay with it.
Do what makes you happy. Not just for the holidays, but forever. It’s a hard thing to do but start slow. Wish her well and move on.
You don’t. You mourn the loss of a parent and you move on. You don’t need toxicity in your life like that. I had to do it too. Just know that whatever HER issue is it isn’t your fault. I gave up trying to force myself into where I wasn’t wanted. It hurt for awhile bit over all I am healthier and happier for it.
Stay away from her. That is toxic and ridiculous. Have your own Thanksgiving even if it’s just you. I’m playing a very low key holiday season. I’m done spending time with people who suck the happiness out of me.
You can’t change a person but you can change how you react to someone. It’s ok to cut toxic people out of your life even if it is family.
I know it’ll sound harsh but, tell your mother exactly how you feel about it and then tell until you can treat me as your daughter we are done. No phone, no dropping by unannounced, no nothing. Then get up and walk out and don’t look back
Sometimes, as hard as it may be, we have to remove toxic people from our lives. Sadly, Family members can be the most toxic people we come in contact with. I’m speaking from experience.
How long were the two of you married. If it was longer then ten years I would have invited him to. You don’t shut your heart down just because of divorce.