How many times are you willing to put yourself through this? It’s your decision.
Cut the cord, lady. Your mother is toxic.
There is a book called Co-dependant No More, it’s been around for years but it very insightful. God bless
Toxic is toxic…doesn’t matter if it’s mom or not!
You want to expose your children to what you grew up with? I chose no
giving birth to you etc may make her your mother but not your mum. and that’s what you need and should have
toxic people need to be cut out from your life until they can alter their behaviour so it doesn’t cause so much pain etc
If toxic fumes started coming through the vents in your house, you’d leave. I did. I made a new home. Your mother, is an awful mother. My heart goes out to you. Also, educating yourself on being raised be a narcissist or borderline mother might help you.
She may be the one who brought you into this word but other than that, she sounds like any other toxic person in the world. She’s going to olay the “woe is me” card every single time. It’s better to cut ties with her now before she does the same thing to your children, if you let them see her. I don’t know how your situation with the kids and her are. She’s going to continue to be manipulative until you decide what’s best for YOU and YOUR FAMILY!
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Love her from a distance and Pray for her, she sounds like an unhappy person.
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Stop sharing so much with her about personal things that you wouldn’t want shared. it’s obvious she can’t keep your confidential chats to herself. Let her into your life as YOU want, not what she wants. You control how many chats you have, what you share, how much shes allowed into your life. You’re in control of this relationship not her. If you really feel you must cut ties, then do what you have to do.
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Dont cut ties just step back abit.
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She is not a mother. Just don’t trust her. You will be better off
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Start with not telling her the babys gender. It’s like giving her a reason to start something.
Cut all ties. You will feel better. I did and never felt happier in my life than now!!
Just because she’s your mother, does not mean she’s a good person. Set boundaries and stick with them. Stop telling her important stuff. She hasn’t treated you with respect or consideration. So she does not have the right to know the important stuff.
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I’d stop updating her on your life so she doesn’t have anything to talk about.
My dad did this shit. Cut ties. You’ll be so so so so much happier.
I would cut ties I did with my dad
Walk away for awhile she will come to understand hopefully
What a b!tch, start some rumors about her, let her have a taste of her own medicine.
I am so glad I had wonderful parents.
That is no parent child relationship…let it go. I did and happy for it
But she really hasn’t been a mother to you at all. Rather a child who had a child and thought the world owed her a favor. Cut that toxic person out of your life. Your children deserve good influence and role models in their lives and she is not that person.
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I would have told her the opposite sex………
Giving birth doesn’t make you a Mother.
There is a group for those of us with narcissistic “mothers”. If you’re interested, I can get you info. 
You did learn from the firsts baby,duh
Where is her loyalty
Go live ur life nothing wrong with loving ur mum from a distance
Ditch her. Find some older female friends of a nurturing nature…
You sre certainly not over reacting; your mom sounds like Trouble!
There is a difference between family and relatives.
If you take someone’s advice on this post f**k yeah and if she tries to pull the mother card then tell her to act like one because she barely ever acted like a mother to you. Then she’ll probably say I put a roof over your head food on the table and that’s just the bare minimum from a parent that’s what they are ment to do. She is toxic she doesn’t want you to be happy but you you can be you got this
Get the toxic out of your life
Cur her out. I did i am 100% happy.
Toxic is toxic
No matter wat
Cut her off
She will learn a lesson sooner or later when she is dying on her death bed and no one is there to visit her …
Cut ties!!! Family does not mean blood!! Clearly she has no cause of concern for you or your feelings and boundaries… Trust me my life has been a million times better since I left my mom behind… No calls no nothing. Blocked her on everything. It’s not a loss when they don’t contribute to the betterment of themselves and those around them. She sounds like she will be just as toxic to your children as they grow up if she hasn’t changed by now!
Cut ties, shes toxic. It doesn’t matter that shes your mother…shes never going to change and you’ll never be happy
The question u have to ask ur self is, how will u feel when she passes away? Will u regret time lost? Will u wish u did things differently? U don’t have to be best friends or even trust her but id choose peace if it’s at all possible.
Id cut her off for good and my dealings with her would be as with any relative, I do not believe she’ll change but, if you feel you need to have a relationship with her, give her the cold shoulder for a while, let her reach out and when she does, you lay down some rules for the relationship to work, tell her it’s the last try
She don’t need to know too much. Just talk about the grandkids and pets. I would of told her the wrong gender on purpose second time around. Surprise for everyone. For third, tell her after the baby is born LOL
I’m in this same situation. Your mental health is more important than a relationship with anyone. Even your mother, I’m learning
Cut all ties with her!
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Don’t feel guilty.
I cut my mother off with zero contact almost 8 years ago and i have absolutely no regrets.
It was the best thing i ever did for my children and myself.
A real mother would never behave this way. My mother was toxic. I cut her out of my life when I left home at 18. When she died, I never arranged a funeral for her. No guilt. Time is short and precious. Don’t waste your time on someone who makes you miserable no matter who they are . Be happy always 
You need peace. You don’t need this in your life girl. Let go of toxic people, family or not. I let go of my father’s side because they were toxic and it was the best decision ever, I don’t have to watch what I do anymore.
Nope. She may have birthed you, but she’s not your mother. It’s ok to cut toxic people out, even parents. You don’t owe them anything because they brought you into this world add did the bare minimum to make sure you survived into adulthood.
Unfortunately… we can’t pick our Parents…. Which really they are not acting like Parents should… Parents like that should never had ,had children….
Maybe a few months…or years of silence will help her!!!
You’re mother sounds like a narcissist which will have had a big impact on you growing up and into your adult life. Go on YouTube and search narcissistic mother and if you can get some therapy to help you recover. You’re worth a lot more than the way she’s treated you xx
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Cut ties with that toxic one…she was not fit to be a parent.
Cut her off!! Stop telling her anything! Toxicity is not healthy for you or your family
You said it. Your mom is toxic. Just go no contact. You tried and failed to set up boundaries. No contact is the way to go
Set boundaries with her and don’t tell her anything personal again. If she doesn’t abide by the boundaries you set, to protect your family and yourself, cut off relations with her. She is toxic and no one needs toxicity in their life! As an adult now, you can choose who you would include in your life! As a mother, it is your responsibility to protect your children against such a person, grandma or not! They can get to know her later when they are adults and can judge for themselves whether they want a relationship with her. So she will try pulling the “mother card” to get her way? Pull out your own “mother card”! No one needs the mental cruelty grandmother likes to play! Shape up or be shunned!
Cut ties. Remove the cancer. You don’t need her you got this.
A sharp knife cuts the quickest and hurts the least. That saying covers alot. If you cut ties fully…do it fast and then let it go.
Not at all
She sounds toxic ugg
Cut it off. Being your mother doesn’t and shouldn’t give her a free pass
Just because someone gave birth to you, does not mean they claim any kind of ownership of you. Especially someone who is that selfish.
You are not obligated to keep a parent in your life.
Remove toxic people. Live life.
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Stop telling her anything you don’t want shared with the world! If you have animosity towards her, take a break from her. Heal yourself!
PAST Time to leave that relationship…
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Why would you trust her when all she has done is lied and made you feel awful. I understand she’s your mom and want her in your life. But if you chose to do that . Don’t tell her personal things you don’t want divulge. But if you want your sanity. Give yourself some space between you and your mom. She is toxic and unhealthy for your well being and probably for your kids down the line. Time spent with your mom. Less is better. . Good luck
Sharpen the axe and cut them ties. She sounds like a right arsehole. Life’s too short to deal with arseholes.
I cut ties with my mother about thirty years ago. I was 23. I tried a couple times after having children. She is a narcissistic, vengeful, negative, verbally/physically abusive woman.
I totally cut her off around ten years ago after her mother passed and she deliberately went out of her way in denying me a pick of one my grandmothers rings.
The ring is not the point. I would have taken a fork or spoon. She purposely withheld, while my other sister picked two.
Petty maybe. But I was DONE!!!
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Cut ties, she is toxic and won’t change.Live you life without her ,it will be happier.
Definitely cut ties. You’re not dumb for feeling this way. She’s being so toxic.
Not all blood is family, toxic is toxic id cut her off
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You said it yourself…shes toxic. Cut her out. If she’s toxic to you shes toxic for your children. Shes gonna try and make you feel guilty. But again its because shes toxic.
Your mother has had more than one chance. I’m so sorry you have had to go through all of this “abuse”. She is toxic. You need to cut ties!
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You were correct. Your mom is toxic. You know what to do. Cut ties. Send her picture. Love her anyway. Forgive her. But cut ties. Your emotional health and the health of your family is the most important goal. Leave poison alone.
Cut her off forever. She will not change and will only bring heartache to your family’s life.
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Just tell her to fuck off and block her if you’re at that point
Regardless of whether she is your mother or not you have a right to be happy, I would cut anyone out of my life who made me feel worthless or brought me down in life, she sounds very toxic x
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Cut ties with her. Mother or not she is a toxic person!
She’s toxic, gotta go! 
Kick her to the curb seriously she’s incredibly toxic and won’t change
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Dont ever feel guilty for cutting someone out of your life or your childs life that us no good for them no matter who they are !! Your home comes first your kids come before ANYONE
Just because she gave birth to you doesn’t mean you owe her anything. She’s toxic and will never stop. For the sake of your children and your husbands family, cut ties. You don’t owe her anything. she clearly doesn’t respect you, its time to love yourself more !
Because she’s blood doesn’t make her family. She’s a relative. Do what’s best for you and your family’s peace of mind.
Family doesn’t mean anything if they’re toxic people. Cut her out and make yourself your own family x family chosen can be a whole lot healthier than family you’ve been born into x
I barely speak to my mother and she isn’t as toxic as your mom is but she made sure that I didn’t get to say goodbye to my dad before he died. I think that we all have a choice to surround ourselves with people who support, nurture and love us whether they are family or friends. Choose love and if that leaves her off the list give yourself permission to cut the cord!!
I cut my Mother out…AFTER she cut ME out. 6 months later we find out shes dying. Brain tumor. I spent hours and hours at night in the hospital defending her and making her comfortable. I was always the “bad” one…but I was there. I was the one who knew she could speak. No one else. I stood up for her because I knew her too well. I was abused for years and I knew EVERY LOOK. And I made her comfortable and I let her go. She was dead 6 months after the first gran mal seizure.
I did my bit. I cleaned up when she had accidents. And I told her we would be okay and she could leave. And that night she did. Alone.
I do not regret how I treated her. It was the best of me…and I am proud that I gave her better than she gave me. Karma. Runs both ways.
I would limit contact and interaction with anyone like that, from my mother to the postman, they can stay out of my life.
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Cut ties with her. It might hurt but it seems like she only has her best interest in mind and nobody else’s. Doesn’t matter if someone’s related to you if they won’t treat you like a person they’re not worth your time or energy.
It doesn’t matter who she is. She is toxic and obviously was never meant to have a child if she treated you like that. Cut her out and keep her away from your children!!!
I would cut ties with her for years and not let her see her granbabies and let her think about the wrong she did to you. Then mabey slowly let her back into your life. You shouldn’t have to put up with that crap.
Cut her out. I did. I was the scapegoat of my family and finally I have respect for myself where I wont allow it anymore. My life is so much better for it 
It’s really sad that your mother can’t see what she is doing. You need to make boundaries. Talk to her. Good luck😵💫
Nah, cut ties if you feel that’s necessary. Blood relations doesnt mean keeping people around who will step all over your boundaries like that and make you feel like trash. Sounds pretty toxic to me.
Gradually remove her from your life. Mother or not, she’s toxic and that’s not healthy for you.
For your peace and your family’s health Cut Ties. She is toxic and you should protect your kids from her!
It sounds like you know what to do already, you’re just looking for conformation bias.
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Cut her out in till she understands that you aren’t taking it anymore
Before I even finish reading this I can already tell that I’m pretty sure she’s a narc just because my narc dad also told EVERY single person he could about my drug use and everything else personal about my siblings and then basically degrade you.
I’d honestly recommend joining this group…
Daughters of Narcissistic Fathers its specifically about dads but I don’t think anyone minds people talking about their mothers at all
Also this group will help you understand no contact, low contact. I didnt have the heart to cut off my dad until I joined the group and people had my back, I’ve been officially no contact for about a year now. They have also validated my experiences for me when no one else would.
Cut her out and go no contact. “She’s your mother” is a cop out.
Pull the I’m your daughter card, and tell her she did a shitty job at being a mother for you. How can she whine, when she LIED to you, CHEATED you out of a great gender reveal party, and Stole your happiness. Maybe she should stand on the corner with a sign.
Snip snip motherfucker. Cut that toxic out. Now. You’ve done nothing wrong. Time to focus on you and your family
Toxic is toxic. Her pulling “I am your mother” is gaslighting. She knows what she is doing.
My mom is the same way. Toxiccccc. Granted a lot of it is due to bipolar and her adamant refusal of her diagnosis and refusal to seek treatment. I don’t know the situation with your mother.
Set boundaries. Tell her you love her but will not having anything to do with her if she doesn’t do a, b, and c. If she gaslights your, cut the ties.
You deserve better. Your husband deserves better. And your children deserve better. Believe me, it hurts. You may feel guilty. That just shows what a good person you are. But you don’t need that toxicity in your life.
Do what’s best for you and your family. I cut my family off years ago and a weight was lifted