So my sons are currently in the backyard playing…it is 1 pm and they are 6 and 9…these kids often fight and yell at eachother and at this point i gave up trying to stop it unless they harm eachother…they mostly just use their words…anways…my neighbor came to the fence and told both of them to SHUT THE F UP…she said it so loud that even i heard her from inside the house…,y husband told me not to cause issues but honestly i want to knock on her door…how should i handle this?
Only thing I would ask is neighbors not use f bomb. Since you have “given up” having others chime in.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My neighbor yelled at my kids from over the fence: What should I do?
Do you know if she works night shift?
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I would definitely knock on the door…I’d have no problem if she asked them to keep it down but swearing at someone else’s children is def no go
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I would have told her to shut the F up and she needs to mind her own damn business those are babies and they deserve to be kids playing outside being loud if they want screw her
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Not much you can do , kids need to play and if in your own yard they have a right to be loud and noisy! Especially during the day! I would ignore her!
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Oh heck no! They’re children, it’s day time, summer is here… if she doesn’t want to hear them she can take her Karen self right back inside… 
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Yell back we have to be neighbors i want to like you, but i won’t if you yell at my kids again they have every right to be in the safety of their backyard.
Hell no! You need a come to Jesus mtg with her. Find out what her issue was/is and let her know that what she did isn’t cool.
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If they are always outside screaming it could be causing issues with the neighbors
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I would have went over the fence!
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Yeah fuck that go over and see what the problem is
I would have a talk with her. And tell her to watch her mouth
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I think you should avoid for now if it happens again then you can definitely intervene because maybe your kids were actually too loud maybe someone is trying to sleep or rest or depressed I mean you never know
Don’t just fold up your sleeves for nothing !
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Ida ran out my door so fucking fast.
Id confront her and ask what the issue is…is it a decent time of day,are they extra loud…they ate children…they will be children…loud is normal.
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Did it work tho? Lol
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U need to intervene with your kids. Yeah they are outside playing, but fighting is different and if it’s excessive (u said u gave up) then i can see where it’d be a problem. As for the neighbor, is this the first time she’s said any thing at all to them or to you?
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Control your kids and be respectful of your neighbors
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She could have said it better but your neighbor also has her right to peace.
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When it comes to my kids, I would wanna make swallow her words.
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Tell the kids to scream louder 
lol.
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I would honestly go over and say I’m sorry my kids were being loud and bothering you but next time I would appreciate it if you came directly to me instead of yelling at my kids so I could deal with it my self and fix the problem
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Did they tho? Cause if so you should thank her lol
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Throw a kids party and have a blast
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Tell her to shut the f up and go buy some ear plugs if she don’t want to here them… jks
just ignore her she’ll get over it.
Idk I don’t think even working night shift is an excuse to cuss at someone’s kids.
I’d address her in the most non-confrontational way possible to see why she thought it was appropriate to say it even if they got under her skin by arguing. 
there are better ways she could’ve spoke.
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Stop being lazy control your kids
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Honestly it doesn’t matter if she works night shift or not you don’t yell at kids. I’m not sure what I would have done but let your kids play. Sorry I can’t help but I’m not a confrontational person by nature but I do protect my kids.
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They’re young and they’re an adult. I would say something. Kids are still learning how to control themselves but your neighbor on the other hand should know better. Could have asked them nicely to quiet down.
Has this neighbor every complained to y’all about the noise in a nice way or is just coming and cussing at your kids for no reason ?
I have a pirate mouth myself but I will be damned if I am gonna cuss at kids for being kids. And I cuss around kids plenty but cussing AT THEM is a different story.
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Go knock on that fn door. I work nights with 3 kids. Unexcusable. 
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I don’t let my kids scream and argue in my yard, out of respect for my neighbours… I’m betting you’re downplaying the noise they create.
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Does she have a dog she might have been yelling at fir barking at your loud kids
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next time shes out doing some petty shit. Mowing the lawn, taking her trash out. Yell back “stfu”.
Umm I’d be posting what happened after I nicely, in a bitchy way, let her know not to curse at my children. She can nicely ask them to quite down if its that loud but don’t curse my child out.
Oh I’d be knocking !!! Regardless of how loud these kids were if she had a problem she should’ve came and spoke to you !!!
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I think it’s okay to say something in a mature calm matter because she shouldn’t be cussing in front of no kids. Kids are going to be kids and they are in their own backyard
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Maybe she had kids outside to and don’t wanna hear all the fighting
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Sounds like she did what you couldn’t?
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Ugh I’ve had nightmare neighbors and I’ve spoken up and it’s just caused more animosity because she’s a child and didn’t want to communicate like adults. So I’m one of those people that likes to communicate when there is an issue and not just be vindictive and cause problems and that hasn’t went well for me. So I’d say if you know she will communicate then go ahead but I’m guessing if they thought it was okay to cuss at them that might not be a high probability of being open minded. I’d say just let it go and be outside when it happens and then when you hear it directly right at that second then say something back like excuse me these are children I’d appreciate it if you did not cuss at them.
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Lol well…when this happened to me I yelled back at them they made my 3 year old cry and I didn’t have time o think I jus full let it rip…
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Start sitting outside with your kids.
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They are kids! They make a noise! It’s normal! Shout at right back at her!
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If my neighbors children go on like that I too would tell them to keep quiet . Why are your Children fighting and yelling ?
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She’s probably sick of hearing your kids argue all the time. If your kids want to argue have them come inside. I do that with mine. My neighbors shouldn’t have to listen to them all the time.
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Cursing at your kids is not ok. Of course kids can be loud but please take off the rose colored glasses if you KNOW it gets angry fighting loud then also time to talk to your kids . Knock on the door with a bottle of wine tell the neighbor you understand perhaps they got annoyingly loud but to text/call you not curse at them
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If your kids were playing and having fun that’s one thing. but if they’re outside screaming and arguing and fighting with each other, that’s another…. maybe you should send them to their room till they can get along and then play outside.
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Your kids have the right to be themselves in their own backyard, but your neighbor also has the right to peace and quiet in hers. I’m a parent as well and totally understand both sides of this. She definitely could have gone about it differently, but I’d talk to your kids as well, especially if it sounds like WWIII in your backyard.
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My husband wouldn’t of had time to tell me not to cause any issues 
BUT I would probably just make them be as loud and play out there as much as possible. Shoot throw a party or two. As long as it’s not too late they shouldn’t be able to call the police 
id do it just to aggravate them.
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I would be going over there and having a go at swearing at my kids … I would care so much if it was to be quiet but once they start swearing that’s it I’m done !
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Jam the music outside fuck her its not even night time there kids let them be kids
I would pick my battles, but if it continues, I’d probably have a (mature) chat with her…no need for drama.
Your kids sound annoying so you should tell them to stfu. Idc what time of the day it is no one should have to listen to kids yell n argue w each other when they’re old enough to know better. Because you gave up the people who live close have to listen to them argue n yell? Smh
Everyone has the right to peace and quiet. I understand kids will be kids, but at the same time, your kids are old enough to be taught to be respectful of the neighbors. If they want to scream and yell, take them to a park or playground area, and let your neighbor have some peace.
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That’s fucked up to tell any kids to stfu.
I’m sure you’re offended however your kids screaming and fighting to the point that you yourself say you’ve given up trying to stop them might just mean that in their story, it’s actually you and your family that are the nightmare neighbours…
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Baked goods are usually a big hit. Or just bring them wine.
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Knock on her door if u feeling bad but learn to control ya kids so other people don’t have to
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I feel like crying and fighting and then I should be done in the house. Nobody wants to hear that. 
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Oh no. My neighbor called my autistic son a fata## while he was playing outside with his army men. My son is the sweetest. He came in crying telling what she had said… I ran over there and whooped her a##. Of course it traumatized my kids but I don’t play.
Just be careful. People are stupid these days and trigger happy.
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Oh as soon as I heard it ide been knocking on her door cause you don’t talk to my kids that way she had no right to do that at all they are kids and kids are loud and being outside that’s we’re it’s ok to be loud girl u better be knocking and telling her I dare you to say it one more time to my kids
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Call police talk to them for advice
I would’ve told my kids to stfu before she did.
She shouldn’t be swearing but who knows what’s going on for her.
Knock that fucking door down
I would definitely go over there and let her know that is entirely inappropriate and she can move if she’s so unhappy with children playing next door. What a psycho
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Breaking dwn a door would have been my first thought. No one has the rt to curse your children
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Noise is for outside. That’s what kids do. Ignore the neighbors. But tell them nit to use foul language
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Kids are kids, it’s outside ignore her if she does it again tell her they’re kids and outside is where they’re loud. I have kids older ones younger neighbors. It’s ok I love the sound of kids…
I find it more concerning that you are allowing your kids to fight and yell at each other all day and it’s annoying you to the point you’ve given up dealing with it…but you expect the neighbours to put up with it? Yes the neighbour shouldn’t have sworn at them but it sounds like it was yelled out of pure frustration at the entire situation, you need to deal with the problem in your backyard before you go confronting your neighbours.
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Idk… you’re better than me! I wouldn’t be free, to post on Facebook. Probably be in jail by now. Lol I would have called her out, immediately.
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Everyone has the right to peace and quiet. Doesn’t mean it has to be super quiet but kids screaming and fighting is not what he wants to listen to as he’s relaxing outside 
You said you gave up dealing with it. That means it forces someone else to. You can’t be mad you made the choice. Change your ways if you want it different.
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Oh hell no! She could have handled it way better. Either spoken to you about it or asked them in a respectful way to keep it down. I would definitely have a word with her and let her know that she crossed the line. She wouldn’t have liked it if they responded for her to shut the f up, so why would it be okay for her to curse at your kids! Nope! Not okay!!
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The next time you see her outside remind her to stay in her lane and not to be cussing at your children. If she has a problem she can bring it to you and not the kids.
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You just said that they are often outside fighting and that you don’t bother to try to stop them anymore so the way I see it is that she stepped in for you, probably could of worded it better but also she has probably had enough of it.
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Sounds like you’ve given up on guiding your kids behavior & your neighbor doesn’t like dealing with the consequences. They might work at home & your kids screaming can be heard in their home office. They might work nights. They might have a disabled child or baby that needs naps.
Kids playing & having fun get loud, which my kids do. But that’s not screaming & arguing every afternoon for sure.
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I find it more concerning that you are allowing your kids to fight and yell at each other all day and it’s annoying you to the point you’ve given up dealing with it…but you expect the neighbours to put up with it? Yes the neighbour shouldn’t have sworn at them but it sounds like it was yelled out of pure frustration at the entire situation, you need to deal with the problem in your backyard before you go confronting your neighbours.
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Personally you weren’t out there so you don’t know what was going on for sure … and you even said you’ve given up on them fighting…. So if you as the parent aren’t going to step in then yes I’m going to say something. Was cussing at them right? No. But neither is you not controlling your kids and teaching them to act like a decent human….I don’t put up with my kids fighting … if you can’t get along then you play separately. And for you to not be outside with a 6/9 yr old … maybe I’m more protective but my kids don’t go out without one of us and they are 5&8…
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Leave a gift basket with a bottle of wine……or vodka. With a note “thanks for being my neighbor and dealing the best you can”
See where that gets you. Passive aggressive…but you’ll get your point across. Lol
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Wow the comments on this post is mind blowing. Never in my life would I allow an adult to yell and use curse words to MY child! If you have a problem with my children being children in THERE/MY yard then you can come to me and we can come to an understanding. No adult will ever speak to my child like that. Nor would I ever talk to a child that way. I’d go to the parent like a mature adult
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Your husband is weak, because it’s on thing to tell kids something. It another to yell at them and it’s very disrespectful to cuss at them. At the fact that your asking what you should, dont even bother. You should’ve reacted right away .
Kids will be kids. They can be loud outside. Tell her to shut the f up and to never talk to your kids again.
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So your mad at the neighbors because you won’t patent your kids??? Lmfao
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Yell out ‘thank you’ back. Lol if your kids don’t wanna listen to you, maybe they will listen to the neighbour. I’m sure my husband would have a different response to this tho. The swear word wasn’t needed. Give it time, see if it helped
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I dont understand ppl that hate the laughter of children…sounds like a miserable old cow… I would tell the kids to keep playing as long as they arnt swearing they can play in their own backyard…
Absolutely unacceptable behavior from your adult neighbor. I would respectfully ask that she refrain from speaking to my children period. Pray for her. Pray about the entire situation. Remember you are your children’s voice. ROAR Mama! Please talk with your children and explain to them that’s not appropriate behavior from said neighbor. Also try the oversized shirt they both must wear together to learn to get along better when they argue. Time away from each other will do them good as well. If you don’t have family to help with that you could also try quite time. Separate rooms for an hour reading books,coloring,tablet,etc 
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You should parent your kids so someone else doesn’t.
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Did they stop?Because if they stopped fighting, I’d probably go over and thank her:rofl:
No, but seriously she shouldn’t be cursing at your kids…I can understand both sides frustration…If your kids are going outside just to fight and argue, that can be annoying to neighbors…but she should have handled it differently:woman_shrugging:t2:
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If you don’t keep a full stop to it she will keep shouting…If u can tolerate do what your husband says but if you want it to stop then better give her back.
The neighbor shouldn’t address it with your kids but with you. I’d go talk to them and see what’s the problem
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Ummmmm I would have been over that fence , F the front door! But I’m that old school special kind if breed😂it’s your backyard and it’s daytime! Who is she to say anything?! I can’t believe some of the comments on here. No one should EVER swear at a child. They are 6&9!
She needs to mind her business! Tell her go have a glass of wine n tune in tomorrow for some more noise😂
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Literally, step in and Stop your kids. If my kids act feral even after being told to knock it off. They come inside and have consequences. I don’t let them annoy the neighborhood and I damn sure wouldn’t want to hear someone else’s kids being feral. sincerely a mother of 4 kids.
If you give up, then don’t make the neighborhood suffer.
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Fear thy neighbors… u never know what another person is going thru. Have a normal ADULT conversation work together to solve the issue idc what rime of day it is. Our elder generation grew up different our generation grew up different an our kids are guna grow up different but there should ALWAYS be one common word thru generations and that us RESPECT.
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I would jump over that fence so fast
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I would say they should if cone to you and ask that you handle it but it seems you aren’t going to and they know it by now . Even in your yard you should parent your kids .
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She was probably yelling at her husband. Chill
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Go knock on her door
Tell you kids to stfu it’s as simple as that
1-you stated you stop correcting your children unless they start harming. First off, discipline your kiddos. Get up, walk outside each and every time they do not listen. Yes, you may be tired. But your a mom. Are they homeschooling or do they go to school? 2-does she work from home? If so, this could be distracting from her job. 3-you should of confronted her from the moment that it was said.
Bite it in the assets from the get go. Sit down, write up a plan, confront, listen, and come up with a plan. And then execute it on both sides. Good luck!
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