Kindly remind them to knock. You don’t want to be startled. Give them a “curfew” so to speak on when a good time to stop by is. Let them know you have a routine that needs to be focused on privately and it’s best done without company. We had some problems with family stoping by and visiting till after 730pm. They meant well but with our 6 kids it’s hard to settle them down and impossible with company. We basically nicely said please don’t come after 6. They were a bit upset until they started to see how rowdy and cranky our kids really did get after 630pm haha
I’d give my right arm to have my momma walk in my house unannounced but that’ll never happen because she died 7 years ago. We just found out my dad has a large mass in his bladder that may be cancer…he’s 77…cherish every moment with them while you still can.
I get along great with my mom. She can come right on in and help me with these bad a$$ kids all she wants lol. I’ll put her to work cooking and cleaning and helping them with their homework and getting their baths and tucked into bed all she wants. Then she can help me clean up the kitchen and dining room and fold the laundry since she has all this extra time to come over and visit so much. I mean what are grandma’s for after all lol. Maybe that’s why mine never comes over lol.
Whether it’s free or not they should respect ur privacy
A landlord must give 24 hours notice
Do you pay rent to your parents for living in their property?
If not then it’s their house to do as they please, if you and your partner pay rent then it’s yours for the time that you are paying rent and she should ask before coming over.
At least put chain locks on the doors.
They are your parents they should be able to come over anytime but if the time isn’t right just tell them not to go around at this time and for that reason. I don’t ring my kids up and let them know I’m comming and my kids most times don’t let me know Ithey are comming. Maybe it’s time to go and rent somewhere else if you ain’t happy
My mother used to always just walk right in ,i for one believe in knocking before entry,because you just don’t know what’s going on behind closed doors,that’s why locked doors are good
Besides if there are children &they go to bed at a certain time,i don’t care who you are ,you are not waking up them ,just so you can see them ,come earlier
Wow that’s really cool right it’s yur mom n dad
Keep a lookout for your mom. When she’s heading towards your door, you and your husband can put yourself in a very awkward position (like getting half naked to have sex) that way when she walks in she will be embarrassed for walking in on you and start knocking or calling first from now on I mean If they are going to feel entitled to show up randomly, might as well have a little fun with it
Try being a big girl and getting your own damn house. How can u be a respected adult when mommy and daddy own your house?
Your parents seem like overbearing control freaks who have absolutely NO respect for you guys. Idc if you pay rent or not. If they allow you to live there the least they can do is have the decency to call ahead of time. Especially having kids and a routine. So disruptive and inconsiderate of them to just show up around that time. You need to just be honest and ask them to please call before coming over. Keep your doors locked!!! Had a friend whose FIL would pull this stunt until he walked in on her naked. So akward. Never came over unannounced again.
Do you pay rent to your parents? Maybe talk to your Dad and have him indicate to your Mom that she should knock. They have a key? Keep door locked. Put a chain lock on the door. You would have to undo the chain before your Mom could come in, And ‘oh if I would have known you were coming I would have unlocked’ . Subtle but it works.
Stop remodeling the property. Give them legal notice that they are not allowed to enter without 24 hour notice or being invited. They are your landlords. You are paying rent to live there, so they have to treat you like tenants, which means they don’t get to break and enter. Really if it went to court you may be able to get rent back due to them breaking in.
Have your husband answer the door naked… Or say “oh good, you’re just in time! we are about to start cleaning the house, where would you like to start?”
If you’re not already paying rent, start. If you’re paying rent, then you are entitled to being notified in advance. Talk to them, maybe talk to your father first so he can rein your mother in. If they still ignore your requests then change the locks and advise them that they are legally required to give 24 hours notice for a visit.
I had the same issue with my mother. Ended up moving out.
If you’re paying rent, they’re landlords and should give 24hrs notice. If not, then you’re gonna have to either move or suffer
Have a conversation with them and explain how you feel.
Lock your door then she can’t come in. Tell her to call first
Talking to them is always an option.
Everyone in my family usually knocks on the door and just comes right in. Unexpected visits are the best unless the kids are trying to go to sleep
tell them to call or change your locks… 💁
I wish my mom were here to walk in my door
Start locking your doors and stand your ground. They need to call before they come over, it’s simple common courtesy.
My parents own the house I live in and we pay rent. (My husband, me and our kids) my dad and mom both have a key. We even get along but they never come over and just come in. Most of the time I know they’re coming but sometimes on their way home they will just stop by but they know that is ok with me but even if the door is unlocked they always knock. If it is your house and you rent from them then they are considered your landlord and it probably depends on where you live but I know most places landlords can not just come in
Being mean will make them make it a lot more difficult. Making a real lease maybe even higher rent. Is it honestly worth it to have to pay higher rent somewhere else? I would watch how I approach the situation because they could just throw you and your family out if you make a stink.
Do you pay rent? If you pay rent you need to get a lease signed by all involved. If you pay rent (I would strongly suggest the lease to help this facr) they must treat you like a tenant which means 24 hour notice before stopping by. At least here is Arizona anyway.
I would try a positive approach. Tell your parents you are trying to have good study habits for the kids. Set up a day of the week and time for family night. This time is set aside especially for them. Let them know that you would prefer they call rather than the impromptu visit.
Do you knock when you’re entering their house? Or drop by unannounced? If you have done it many be why they don’t think about it. If you want a boundary start with your husband talk about what you’re looking for . Call before coming over or not coming at dinner / bed time ?
Sounds like one of those situations what even if you asked politely the mom may still get offended. If it was me, I would just make comments, like ‘oh if I knew you were coming, I would have made you all dinner too’, or ‘oh just in time for homework, kids cant play yet, they’re busy’, or just other comments to show that they basically inconvenienced you and the family. Maybe they’ll get the drift to call or knock first. Idk hun, that’s a hard one.
My parents are gone I would give anything for them to just show up and walk right in. My kids were between 3-7 and are already forgetting their grandparents. Be thankful.
So don’t answer. That’s what I used to do. “Sorry, should’ve called before you wasted the trip.” Not necessarily for my parents but for anyone.
Be glad your parents come. What is wrong with you
The day will come that you will be so sorry for what you are saying
I as a parent will do anything in the world to keep my kids happy.I left work to take care of my grandkids.We have no set boundaries on time on dropping in each other whenever and works both ways.Being a young couple though it’s common courtesy to knock before entering their home.My children and grandkids are free whenever to drop by at any second of any day unannounced at my house.We are always excited to see them at any time.Its a sad day when parents are seen as unwelcome visitors but I guess I have never experienced that feeling with my kids
My mom is welcome to my house when ever she wants. Vice-versa. Especially for homework time come over and help the grandkid with some math. Lol. But i guess everyone has a different aspect.
One day they won’t be around and I feel you’ll regret feeling this way. Also it’s kinda their house
If u pay rent n I think its like a landlord tenant thing and u have rights and they can’t just drop in take keys bk if they have key and talk to ur mum about it saying u don’t mind her visits just would like a heads up and diff time as she has been interrupting homework dinner etcx
If that is all you have to complain about , you need to get over it .I would love to see my parents walk through my door . They never turned me away , no matter what they were doing , day or night.
Did u tell them to call first? If so, make sure doors are always locked so they can’t just come in…if they have a key, they shouldn’t be letting themselves in anyway. If talking doesn’t work, move
Talk to them, let them know you love when they stop by, but would really appreciate a call first. If they have a key, change the locks.
They should have more consideration. That’s not cool. I won’t do that to anyone.
The only people who are allowed to walk right in my home are the people who live here. My mom is a little different though with her health. If need be I will stop over unannounced but I knock first. I try to call most of the time before heading over. When she was allowed to drive we made plans before showed up. If she was out and wanted to just drop by to see the kids for a minute she would give me a heads up call. It all depends on how hard you want to make it on yourself on how you go about it. Legally they have to give you 24 hours notice as landlords. It gets rough when they are your parents they could just stop by for a visit and see something and say something as landlords. Y’all need to set up ground rules for how things need to work for everyone and put it in writing. Otherwise you need to move.
I don’t think your wrong. That’s just disrespectful to barge in and stop whenever. Especially if it’s frequently and/or late in the evenings
Its their house… You don’t like it move…
Hmm guess it’s the type of relationship you have my mother comes right in I do the same at her house
Try locking the door
I believe if you and your boyfriend want a say in when your parents visit, you need to grow up and buy your own house, Unless you regularly pay rent, then you should have some say.
Get your own house then and stop complaining
- buy your own house 2) lock the damn door
I think you should lay down some ground rules
Wait hold up folks, she might be renting. Even if she is not, she still has rights as a tenant/dweller.
It doesn’t matter if they own it. If you live there they should knock at least. If someone else was renting it they wouldn’t be doing that
Buy your own home, then make the rules.
Parents usually mean well. talk to them. Invite them over at a time you like. I wish my parents could come over again. Especially when I need help with the kids.
She didnt say she didnt buy the house or is in the process of buying it
I had to make appointments to see my grandchildren when my son was married. It was hurtful. The other grandmother didnt have that rule. I never just barge in and usually check to see if they are busy b4 I stop by, but that one DIL just…anyway try talking to them
If you’re renting, legally they cannot enter without notice.
If you are NOT renting, it seems more of a check-in to be sure all is well.
But the reality is, if you want it to stop, move. Just consider the consequences that could possibly follow that course.
Best of luck.
Do you rent it or are they paying your way
Let’s try a different take on this. Lets say they were renting this home from someone else would u still tell them to suck it up n move if they dont like it. Landlords legally cant just pop up n let themselves in whenever the fuck the want to.
I love how every time I see posts like this every results to move like sure I’ll go pack everything up for me and my kids and pull the money out of my ass
First, tell them how you feel and go from there. They may not even realize what they are doing.
Lock the door and if they have a key change the damn locks. Problem solved!
Doesn’t matter who owns the house, I wouldn’t allow anyone to let themselves in! If it were me I would be finding somewhere else to live.
Id definitely lay down some rules. You have ur own little family. They should give a heads up if they are coming over… or ask if its a good time to do so… just becuz they own the house ur staying in, doesn’t give them the right to invade your privacy.
Strange. Do you lock the door? If they have a key, did you give it to them? Just because they own the house, just because they’re your parents, doesn’t give them permission. This is highly disrespectful and I’m surprised your boyfriend hadn’t raised Cain.
I would say yes, they need to ask. Your landlord doesn’t just come into your home without letting you know, why should your family members?
Time to be independent. Don’t want them coming in? Move🤷♀️
My suggestion is first, talk to her. Second, lock the door. If she has a key, change the locks. Idk…that’s a tough one.
Lock your doors, problem solved.
You need to thank God they are still alive and can stop by.
New house rule. Everyone walks around naked.
You have rights to privacy regardless who owns the home or what situation you are in.
You don’t let the owners of rentals walk in or the realestate. Family is no different
It all comes down to respect and privacy
It’s not the case off “I expect my family to provide for me”
It’s a case of “I gave you a house now I have rule over how you live your life” which is not ok.
I guess it’s just what you’re comfortable with. My parents come when they want, and walk right in. However it’s the same when I go to their house, my other home. I walk right in, look in the fridge ect. I guess I never thought about other people having a different type of relationship with their parents other than the type of relationship I have with my own. I think you just have to do what is best for you and your family.
It doesn’t matter if they own the house. It’s called respect.
If you pay rent then they should knock. If you DONT pay rent, then it’s their house that you’re staying in for free so I wouldn’t complain too much
Be a grown up n sit them down n talk to them… Be thankful they are still here to stop by… They will be gone 1 day n you will look back n miss that… Promise that… Just a thought.
Do you rent from them or do you all live there for free? I think that makes a difference.
I own the place my son and his fiance live in …I’d neve just go in . I’d talk to them if o were you
I would suggest talking to them. I use to live on my parent in laws property and they would bust in all the time. We talked to them and it didn’t change so we changed the locks and locked the doors all the time so they were forced to knock. They were mad at first, but it did get better. Ultimately, it never changed and if we forgot to lock the door, they walked in so we made the choice to move. It was expensive, but worth it.
Change the locks. When they ask why tell them because you lost a key and if they ask for one tell them it’s a safety measure not to give them out.
Just talk to them. If that dosent change anything, start showing up unannounced at their place at the most inconvenient times.
So we actually just went through this. We had to set boundaries. Call or text before you come over. It was hell getting my boyfriends mom to abide by this and she even had multiple crying fits over it. But since we’ve stood out ground and she’s been doing it, it has relieved Sooo much stress in our lives.
Naw let em catch you fucking and I mean(NASTY fucking) one time bet they stop (I’m joking)
Start walking around naked… Theyll start knocking💁😂
If you pay rent then they have no business just walking in. Id always keep the door locked
Change the lock or talk to them
They are your parents… grow up and talk to them.
Hopefully the parents aren’t letting you stay there with strings attached. Like you are forever indebted and they will hold them helping out by providing a place over your head forever.
Establish firm boundaries with them. They should still respect your privacy and space
Change the locks and lock the doors. Make them have to knock. And never feel bad about answering the door and not letting them in…tell them it’s not a good time and hold firm.
When all else fails time for the family to start running around the house in underwear and t-shirts.
Sounds like something that happened a few years back about a landlord that helped himself into a rental home. The family renting from him were in bed asleep, when the mother woke up to the smell of pizza cooking. She called the cops, and sued the home owner. They moved out as soon as they could. I highly suggest setting ground rules. If she walks in again, call the cops. 🤷
uhm landlords aren’t allowed to just show up unannounced! Maybe buy some new locks for the doors! and just lock her out
My husband’s mother used to do the same thing until we stopped answering the door. Didn’t care if our little might be asleep, if we might be in the middle of watching a movie together, showering or cooking dinner. She didn’t care, and there was definitely bad blood. You don’t call ahead, you don’t come in!
They make door mats that say ‘If you didn’t call we aren’t opening the door’ and change the locks. Every one has boundaries, even parents know this.
Personally in my house family is always welcome anytime and never have to knock. I would say get over it
You don’t get along with your mum. But she has given you house to live in that they own . Why are you living in your parents house if you don’t get along with her . You sound like you are way to spoilt
Switch locks and lock doors at all times. 💁💁
There your parents just sit and tell them how you feel. Even if you don’t get along. If you don’t want them dropping in tell them to atleast give you a heads up!! They’ll respect your wishes and if not just move. don’t think you’ll have the right to change the locks especially if you don’t own the house.
Things work both ways…u don’t get along with your mom, but u r living in her house…don’t get me wrong that still doesn’t give her the right to just come in unannounced…but me personally if I didn’t get along with her and she knows no boundaries, I would just live somewhere else.
start locking you doors… who would even leave them unlocked in this world is crazy.
Fun fact: if you do not have a renters agreement, they are legally allowed entrance to the house. I found this out because my late husband’s father came into my apartment (that he owns) and began to remove stuff. The police said there was nothing that he could do because my father in-law owns it. I technically am not allowed to change the locks by law…but fuck the law sometimes.
Do you pay to live there? If not then it’s their house and sadly nothing you can do.