Give them a break. We all deserve a break from people kids or not.
If ur sister and her kids are there all the time and u go there everyday I bet they do want a break! Who wants someone at their house 24/7 even if they are their kidsā¦. Yāallās grown they did their job and just want some piece and quiet sometimesā¦. Get a jobā¦ make friends with the neighborsā¦. Somethingā¦
No reason to be hurt over itā¦
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OMG pop the tit an be an adultā:rofl:
the shit this site posts cracks me up!!
Why is it as motherās we ask others for space but when weāre asked to give space we get hurt? Give them a break. Learn to be alone. Went straight from momās house to a husband. And too afraid to be aloneā¦ you couldnāt dye your hair at home as that provides a mess in itself?
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Maybe get a job so you arenāt so bored or take your mum out sometimes. He may just not want people in his house all the time but dont stop seeing your mum
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She is your Mom. Take her out somewhere (coffee, lunch, walk at a park etc) and talk to her. The truth might sting from time to time but is not going to scar. A heart to heart with her and then come up with a plan & be respectful. I would not even mention your Sister at all, that is between them. Sending you bright healing blessings and good vibes
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sounds like its all him not mom so call mom n take her out to lunch without s-dad n hell get his space ha
I would talk to your mom privately and see how she feels. Maybe she just wants a little space to herself for a bit. Or maybe she didnāt say anything at all. Better to talk to her directly. 
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Stay away for awhile!
Talk to your sister and see if she has been told anything then talk to your mum
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Stop going over there and when mom calls to ask why tell her.
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Iāll add, it would be good to discuss with your husband about possibilities to move to a safer place.
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Tell your mom thatās not right
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Could you volunteer at your kidsā school or at some local non-profits? Take some college courses at a community college (even if itās not for credit)?
I would 100% be saying something to your mum. Just along the lines of 'hey mun if theres ever an issue, please know that i respect your feelings and you can talk to me yourself" type of thingā¦
Your step dad sounds ridiculous saying that to you and then telling you not to tell your motherā¦ like thereās a chance he is doing it because its a but juch for your mum, but also he shoukd not be interfering in your motherās relationship with youā¦
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I have two grown children and my daughter is over with her kids daily! I love her and my grand babies more than life itās self but understand where they are coming from. I wish mine would limit the days she comes over. I work full time, baby sit while she works and have no time to my self. As we get older itās much harder to keep up the house and kids.
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I feel really sad for you! I canāt imagine this! My mom always has welcomed my son and I with open arms and my step dad as well. They would love it if we came all day everyday! Iām sorry that heās said that to you and that they feel this way. I would also talk to your mom about it because sounds like maybe your stepdad is just saying this because itās how he feels not her!
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Child if you donāt go talk to your momma and ask if this is how she feel remember hes step dad that your mom get over there
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As someone whoās mom or dad would never, Iām so sorry your feelings are hurt rn. Does your dad normally speak for your mom or do you guys have convos that are usually ādonāt tell your momā worthy? Even if my dad did say this to me, Iād def go to my mama and ask whatās going on. Do you live with other people so you donāt feel safe?
Talk to your mom. Who cares if this upsets your step-dad. He probably is the one that doesnāt want you to visit and claims itās your mom.
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Donāt ask them for help. This was probably hard for them. Stay away until your Mom calls, if she wonders why, tell her the truth.
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You should talk to ur mom in person alone cause I was at my mommas house every day til parents moved out of state and now shes been gone 6 yrs. And I ur momma I dont think has no idea he said that
Could it be maybe that is how he feels and thatās why he doesnāt want you to say anything to your mom?
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I would talk to your mom just to clear it up if she doesnt want u over there all the time but just from the sound of it dont tell your mom kinda makes me think its more him an not ur mom ā¦
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OOC: text ādo you feel up to company today Mom?ā
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Definitely talk to your mom. If you were my daughter that is exactly what I would want for you to do.
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Tell her . Maybe he should leave once in awhile
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Te donāt tell your mom I said this is a huge red flag in my book! Like itās how he feels and not her. I would just casually bring it up to her and see what she says
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Maybe he wants time for himselfā¦ā¦with someone else besides your mom???Sure makes me wonder what his problem isā¦ā¦
Your stepdad could be lying saying she is saying stuff like that. If you have a good relationship with your mom, Iād ask her without your stepdad there.
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Mention it to her in front of him that you respect their request to not visit so much and respect their privacy , hmmmm bit suspicious of the step dad and looking after your sisters kids could this be why he donāt want you there everyday, hope nothing sinister is happening.
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Tell your mom. Sounds to me like he has an issue with you coming over.
Donāt visitā¦.and tell your mom
The fact that your dad said donāt mention this to your mum means she has no idea about whatās been said. She probably wouldnāt want that. However thatās between your parents. If your mum asks tell her donāt lie to her
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Sounds like he may be up to no good, especially not being able to ask your mom. I think daddy might have a playmate. Mention it to mom. My parents complain I donāt visit enough.
If your mom really said that he wouldnāt have said for you not to bring it up to her, he sounds like a narcissist not getting enough attention and heās trying to isolate your mom from you. Let someone tell me not to see my mom lol, you were there first remember that, youāre HER baby remember that. No mother worth her salt ever wants her kids to be away from her, no matter the kids age. Donāt let him do this to your family!
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Would def have an open and honest talk with your mom, I canāt imagine a mother saying that
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Tell your Mother ASAP!
Screw this arsehole heās your stepfather,how dare he tell you not to come over+then not to tell your Mother he told you???
I tell him to go to GO straight to HELL quick fast+in a hurry!!
Talk to your mom privately. She may have no idea he is doing this. I had a step mom like that. She turned evil after my dad died. Iām sorry youāre going through this.
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This might be the unpopular opinion, but if youāre that bored maybe you should get it job? Maybe your mom wants some alone time and was too scared to tell you so your dad did? My mom loves her empty nest/ alone time. Could you ask if you could allot yourself certain hours or days for a visit as opposed to being there everyday simply because youāre bored?
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Talk to you mom, be honest and ask her and do your best to listen to her without letting emotions rule.
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Talk to your mom that doesnāt sound right
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Not trying to be the bad guy here, but maybe they just need a little alone time? Also, I have a sister whoās constantly coloring her hair in my parentsā bathroom & itās completely ruined the walls, sink, towels, & multiple shower curtainsā¦ maybe do that at your house & they might also be a little happier to have you over. Like I said, not trying to be rude, just trying to figure out what would make everyone happier in this situation.
Talk to your mom, your step father trying to keep it from her,he knows itās wrong.
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did you pick up after yourself when you painted your hair?
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Your mom has no idea. Talk to her.
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TBH, your mom is probably tired and didnāt want to hurt your feelings because you seem VERY SENSITIVE.
See I got some questions:
- How many days a week are you there and for how many hours? Itās seems like you like to be there while your husband is at work. So itās safe to assume that youāre probably there most of the day.
- How many kids do you have and how old are they? Are taking care of the kids the whole time you are there or do you have your mom doing it? Before you leave do you clean up after yourselves?
- You said she keeps your sisterās kid all of the time, does your sister work or go to school?
- Your current home makes you feel super unsafe, did you ever think about getting a job so you guys can move out of that situation faster? Maybe your mom would be willing to babysit or you can look into childcare.
If you want to know how your mom feels just talk to her. Iām almost certain if she told her side of the story it would be quite different.
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When my parents were alive, if I didnāt visit on my days that I could they would be calling me and asking me if I was ok.
Definitely have a talk with your mom. Iām not as close as you are but my mom would NEVER not want us to visit. She does request that we call or text before coming over to see if she is up for visitors but that is because she had horrible debilitating migraines from a neck injury. Please talk to your mom
Talk to your mom but also understand that if they do want some space itās not because they donāt love you. Mabye they just want there home to themselves for a little while. Not all parents want there kids around all the time. Some parents want a empty nest once there kids move out. They donāt mind you visiting as long as you are not overstaying your welcome. It sounds to me like you may be over staying your welcome. Might need to find a hobby or get a job etc. They may want alone time or time just to walk around the house naked lmao.
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Sounds like you need to talk to your mom, if she didnāt say anything and your step dad did and he said not to say anything? Seems sus to me.
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Give it time. Find a hobby or a group, volunteer. Walk even if itās in a mall.
They have a group called meet up with LOTS of different interest. Maybe you can join a couple of groups, and find new interest
Give them some space, like damn. Some people donāt like company ALL the time.
Girl if you donāt just talk to your mama like the grown women you are. Let her tell you that
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Sounds like itās his idea. Talk to mom
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I doubt your mum would know, if he said dont mention it to her. Iād be asking her.
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Go about your business and do something productive. You can color your hair at your home. If itās unsafe, find a new place to live. Be independent. They will call when they want to see you. Itās not about you and more about them. Unless you complain the whole time. Have confidence that you can do anything.
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Bring it up to your mom
Talk to your mama. Your mama will tell you.
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Talk to your momma,
Life is to short.
What parent says that lol Iām so sorry
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Talk to your Mom, who cares what he says
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Talk ur mom and let her know what her husband has told you get her side of story maybe he is lying to you about ur mom saying that stuff
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Take a few deep breaths and remind yourself that this doesnāt mean your parents love you any less. If you need daytime stimulation, pick up some hobbies. Go hang out at Starbucks or the library. Get a part time job or volunteer somewhere. Nursing homes often welcome volunteers to visit residents with few visitors. Animal shelters, food banks, maybe even your childrenās school. Join a gym or club where you can make new friends.
This isnāt actually about you. Itās about your parents wanting time to themselves. Just roll with it and stop taking it so personally. A little space is healthy, thatās all they are asking for. Donāt let your feelings get bigger than the situation warrants. They still love you and enjoy your company, they just need time apart too.
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Anyone who says āSo and so said this about you but donāt tell her I told you and donāt talk about this to herā usually is lying.
He doesnāt like you around so much for whatever reason. Donāt you dare listen to him, go talk to your mom
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Maybe your step dad just said thatā¦ your mom might not of said anything like thatā¦talk to your mom
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Definitely talk to your mom.
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I think once parents have grown children and become empty nesters they enjoy that time, as they should theyāve raised their children to live their own lives. Help is okay, as long as help is reciprocated. Also if she has your sisters kids sheās mentally exhausted Iām sure like we are as mothers. Iād maybe limit your time to visiting once a week bc more than twice is a bit invasive in my opinion. Find things you enjoy to do while your husbandās at work.
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Stay away . Then when your mom calls and ask why you havenāt been over to visit tell her the truth about what your step dad said
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Def be talking to your mom, tell her that if she wants you to stop coming so often that she needs to tell you that
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Just tell your mum cause it sounds like heās lying! Iām also guessing your sister is his biological daughter? You will never know the truth if you donāt speak to your mum about it.
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Talk to your mom. The fact that he said not to raises all kinds of red flags.
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Any parent wants their kids around all day everyday. Talk to mom
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Sounds like my āstepdadā whom i disowned for
Gaslighting and being toxic and controlling- i cut him out like a hot knife thru butter- use to do the āfont tell ur momā bullshit
Parents dont tell thr kids they need a break- jmo 
You are being rude if youāre going over to your momās house unannounced,
to hang out EVERY DAY because youāre bored. If you want to spend time with your Mom, invite her out to lunch, go get mani pedicures with her, etc. This way she can accept the invitation or decline it and you arenāt imposing on her by being at her house daily expecting her to drop everything and entertain you. But I would talk to your Mom to better understand the situation, maybe itās simply she would rather you call first, or wait later in the day, or limit the time to a few hours and not all day etc
Talk to your mum about it. It should come from her no one else if she doesnāt want you there as much.
I think heās lying
Talk to your mom
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Talk to your mom! You are not his daughter and thatās why he said it! Iāve never heard of a parent complain their kids come over to damn much!!!
Well I guess Talk to your mom about it.
But in their defense- yāall are grown now, adults. This is their āfree timeā now.
Plus Iād get irritated too if someone was always just coming over cause they were bored.
But I also wouldnt be going to someone elseās house to dye my hair either.
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Iād just cut them off and ghost them stop going and getting moving donāt share information and when they can to ask then say well I wasnāt allowed their so
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I would talk to your mom. He may have made it up.
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I totally understand how hurt you are. Did you ask him why he felt they needed a break? They might be having personal issues that they need to iron out and it might be easier to do so without an audience. Taking care of a child full time when their own children are full grown can be exhausting and stressful. Give them a few days and in that time you can put your feelings into perspective. Perhaps you can work out a visiting schedule that everyone can agree on.
Talk to your mother!!! Do not listen to him. He is a stepdad
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Just respect them. I understand because I too would go to my Momās house out of boredom and to get out of the house but it is her house and she deserves her own privacy. No need to be upset. They (parents) spend 18-25 years raising kids and having them at their homes, to look forward to having their home and their own āmeā time. Try making plans and asking for a time thatās good for them.
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Ask your mom what she thinks about you coming over, then let her know what your step-dad said. I have a feeling there might be reasons for him saying what he said, for example I would say no to my daughters coloring their hair at my house. Hair dye can and has ruined counters, towels, etc.
If you are old enough to have kids, you donāt need to visit your parents so often. Some people live hundreds of miles from parents and do fine!
Call her every couple days to just talk,and set up one day a week to visit.
If she taking care of your sisterās children, she might be getting over tired.Think of how old they are, maybe you could help by watching your sisterās kids one day of the week, just to be a thoughtful kind sister,daughter. ā
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Doubt heās lying, your mom probably doesnāt want to hurt your feelings, but sometimes people want their house to themselves. And if she already has to watch your sisterās kids, sheās probably just maxed outā¦ I wouldnāt take it personally eitherā¦
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I would talk to your mom! Sounds like your step dad doesnt want you there but since he said donāt tell your mom sounds like she knows nothing about it.
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Your mom maybe going through something right now and he is trying to help her by providing space. Talk to mom and see whats going on. Talk to him, there maybe something you donāt know or that she wonāt tell you.
My mom lives right around the corner and we used to be there daily. She loved it
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Donāt do it! He will call u a lier. Just wait till mom asks what wrong.
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Iād talk to your mum. Thereās no way I would ever stop my kids from coming home after they left - Iād expect them to waltz straight through the front door to the cupboard like they never left 4 or 40, those are our babies till the end 
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Talk to your mom. If this is how she really feels then she should have talked to you herself. She may be able to explain it in a different light
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Donāt over think any of this. Cut back on going over there. Itās probably as simple as she wants to be alone sometimes. I feel that in mah damn soul!
Ask your mom if she wants you to cut down on visits
I know how you feel.
Ask your mother if it is her wish. If she says yes, just donāt go back.
Just not go visit and then when/ if mom calls to ask why you havenāt been visiting, tell her what was said.
If she doesnāt ask, then youāll have your answer on whether she knew or not.
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How do you even know itās true? Confront her?
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