If I see the word “literally” one more time…
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I would discuss it with my mom. Period
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Personally I think he’s full of it and I would talk to your mom about it
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Talk to ur mom… I would feel the same too if my “step” mom said that to me… but I don’t call her stepmom to me she’s my real mom… she’s always been there for me no matter what… talk to ur mom… I always take my baby to see my parents too jus about everyday and I barely ask for any help… i try to not depend on my parents for anything I always try to get it myself first… jus talk to ur mom…
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Take her out to eat and talk but way to fix something you didn’t know was happening, maybe it’s not you and all the time she’s babysitting and you show up on a free day, for her but you won’t know till you go to HER
If you have that much free time during the day, and you are bored, why not volunteer somewhere for a charitable organization?
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From experience, that was totally your step dads idea! Yes, ask your mom about it. If you have children, why are you bored? Color your hair at home! It’s messy!
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i would bring it up to mom. fuck that
I’d talk to your mom and ask her for her honest answer on this, just to make sure he’s not one-sided in his opinion & trying to make it seem like your mom feels the exact same way! Most of the time, it’s just one person in a relationship feeling a certain way…not both!
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I feel like you’re being slightly immature. Your parents need alone time just like any other person. If you feel unsafe where you live, then find another place. You can also find a job to keep you distracted 
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Just keeep doing what you do, if your mom has a problem she will tell you.
You need to talk to your mom directly
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You should talk to your mom but also maybe you should give them space. Maybe they really do feel like you’re there too much. Find some friends to hang out with when you’re bored…
It would be a long day in hell before I would darken their door again, I ‘m sure you’re Mom will come looking to see what’s wrong and then you should tell her because I don’t believe in secrets and it will give her the opportunity to have a heart to heart with you, I understand that you are hurt but there could be things going on that you are unaware of… I wish you all the best
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My step mom told me my dad wanted me to go home…that he felt I was having sexual fantasies about him. 25 years later I found out the step mother LIED. Always check 2nd hand info when it doesn’t set right
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I’d tell my mom… There’s a reason he said not to tell her. He doesn’t want her to know he’s tired of you being there. She’d have to choose between you and him. I’d tell her
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If I were you, I’d ask my mom. If your step dad said that to you and said don’t say anything plus you guys never had a great relationship, it’s probably just him being an ass
I would be asking my mum what she wanted, not taking the word of the “step” father
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To me it sounds like stepdad doesn’t want your momma to know about it because he knows he shouldn’t be doing it! My stepmom use to do this exact thing to me. She use to tell me my dad said he loved her more than me and such, just to get under my skin (I was 6). Also, don’t take it personal, most likely your stepdad is overwhelmed by the grandkids and is projecting on you. Just step back a bit, tell your mom what was said and simply say “if that’s how you feel I completely understand” if she doesn’t stand up for you about it, then there’s your answer love. I’m sorry your family is being like this. I’m sorry you get bored and lonely. I do myself!
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Time too grow up they won’t always be there to fall back on that doesn’t mean they don’t love you or your sister maybe they just need time for them things they want to do, their not getting younger , need old people time just the two of them.
You can still ask them to help you move go over maybe twice a week
Like talk to your mum about it but you should find some think to do on your day off . May be 1 mouth ask your mum to have coffee. Then your not all at there house . But your step dad has know right talk to you with out your mum be there .
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I would ask your mom directly but hey, maybe you do spend too much time there. That could be.
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How about finding a hobby or something else to do except stop over daily. Maybe ask if they feel like company as they may want their personal time too! It’s too much- just give them space and have no hard feelings about it.
Continue to communicate with your family and love them- just don’t smother them. Maybe they’re trying to avoid codependent relationships…
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Talk to your mom first honestly.
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If you have kids you shouldn’t be bored, you should be home making memories with them. Also, why not get a job so you aren’t bored.
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I think you should talk to your mom. It’s good to get your feelings out and let her express hers. A simple talk could help solve and avoid so many misunderstandings.
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Maybe mom is getting overwhelmed/wore out taking care of sisters kids all the time and having you and her and her children over all the time. He may just be looking out for her because he sees what it’s doing to her so he decided to step in for her best interest. Maybe he’s had a talk with your sister as well or plans to have one soon.
I think you should talk to her so you understand where this is coming from but be respectful of her feelings, as she could be worn out and overwhelmed and truly just need a break for a little bit. It sounds like she does a lot for you and you sister.
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Stay away till your mom starts to miss you n when she calls, tell her why.
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Young one the relationship between your Momma and you - is just that - between your Momma and you. Has your Momma ever had a problem in the mouth dept.(talking to you) - ??? So has anything changed between you two??
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I would talk to your mom, make sure you are getting the truth.
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Just stay away and let your mom ask why……
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As a woman with grown kids and grandchildren I have to say it would drive me nuts having them around every day! I love my family but I also love being retired with my husband and no longer having those responsibilities. Get a babysitter…the kids are your responsibility, not hers! Let her enjoy her time…trust me, she will call when she wants to see you!
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I would say something.
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As a mom with grown kids I would like to say…you an never visit too much. Never heard of such. You are her baby. I say her because your step dad is asking you it to come much. He ask you it to mention it to her. That tells me she doesn’t know nor does she approve. I wouldn’t approve of my husband telling this your children. You need to ask her if you are in the way. Ask her to be honest and if she would like for you to cut back on visiting. I’m sure she will say there’s no problem. I say that because again He said don’t mention it. That is a red flag to me. Why? Talk to mom.
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I had this exact same issue. I live on the same private road as my parents. I had my dad basically tell me my mom had stuff to do and I was stopping her from doing them. I didnt feel that way because I was always playing with my kids and had them in the pool since I didnt have one. I literally cried my eyes out but after staying at my house for about 2 weeks she started coming over to me and asking to watch the kids all the time. Maybe shes just overwhelmed and feels she needs to get some time to herself. She will come around. Mine did. We are like best friends. So it hurt but I was able to understand where she was coming from. Dont let it make you mad. Just think of how she feels as well.
See… mine and my mom’s relationship is, if I don’t hear from her in a few hours, I’m calling because she thinks she’s grown and stuff 
BUT with that being said, I’ve very straightforward with my mom. If someone told me I can’t come over, it’s going to be an issue because that’s my mama. The first thing my mother taught me as a child is, if I’m told NOT to tell her something, to come tell her because it may be important. Well, I’ve kinda lived by that rule. I don’t keep anything from my mama. So, your mom probably hasn’t said anything of the sort, it’s probably your step dad. Just tell your mom that you want to do lunch and when you get there have a heart to heart! You will never know unless you lay it on the table 
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Definitely talk to your mum
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Maybe he’s just trying to get it in???
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Invite her over to spend time with you
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You’re hurt because they need personal space ? What they do for their grandkids isn’t reflective of your relationship with them. You are a grown adult who seems to be putting the fact that she doesn’t feel safe where she lives and doesn’t like to be alone on her parents to help her carry and that’s not necessarily fair to them. Give them the space they asked for … which doesn’t mean never come over but not everyday because you know they might be busy babysitting or whatever else they choose to do
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Talk to your mom, if he doesn’t want you to tell her then most likely its him not her. When covid first hit some of my family members had a falling out and I didn’t get to talk to my mom for over a month and we r close,( she had moved in with those family members) , even though I tried calling her almost everyday, then I finally saw her walking and she talked to me , she didn’t know I had been trying to call all that time. Then shortly after that I almost lost my mom , she had a stroke. No one will ever keep me away from her again, I call her everyday and go to her house a few times a week . I ask her if she needs anything, or needs to go anywhere everyday.
If you are close with your mom and this seems out of character, I would talk to her face to face , and then bring in the step dad.
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Talk to your mom she may not know
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I would talk to your mum NICELY about it just in case it is slightly untrue just because he said don’t mention it to your mum, that sounds a bit weird to me like maybe she doesn’t know about this. Also sometimes when they get older they really do get used to being alone and like to be by themselves more often, it doesn’t mean they don’t love you or want you to visit at all and you also don’t know if they have had this conversation with your sister as well. If it’s all true maybe your mum didn’t want to hurt your feelings but maybe just visit once a week for a couple of hours or take your mum out for a coffee and cake.
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I vote you talk to your mama and get clarification on her feelings and where she’s truly at.
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Oh. It may not be you… if I had kids all day I’d be done like toast.
Tell your mom.Screw that step dad…
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Its ok to feel the way you are feeling now. But once you gather yourself, keep away emotions a bit… relax and analyse. How can we make a person feel to miss the other person and make them feel they would like to have you over? Yes. By being there for them… by helping them around the house… by cleaning and tidying for them whenever you are there… our parents will start to feel special and loved when we do their chores for them once in a while. They are aged abd its time for them to be on the receiving end… just my experience. Best of luck!!
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Tell your mom…she needs to know what’s going on…I went thru the same thing
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The fact he said not to tell your mum what he said to me is a red flag. I’d talk to your mum about it.
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Don’t go over and when your Mom calls to see why your not going over, tell her you thought they needed a break, then gradually visit but don’t over do it…
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Eventually you’re going to have to be an adult and do it on your own. Yes, parents are there to help and guide, but at what point? Man, my mom has cut me off, and that was a great thing for me. They are telling you they are tired. Your sister should probably man up and stop bringing her kids over constantly, and also, tell your mother.
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Definitely talk to your mom…
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Respect their boundaries! Find some friends your age. Learn to like YOURSELF enough to where being alone isn’t an issue. Find a hobby!! Seek some therapy! Not being ugly, but there can be a real peace and growth in learning to like your self enough to enjoy your own company.
After my long life, honey, just stay away!! If they want to see you, they will let you know!!!
Sounds like maybe mom doesn’t know . I’d talk to her .odd he say don’t tell her . That would make me think she doesn’t know .
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Do not sweep this under the rug. He is trying to put a wedge between you and your Mom. Ask your Mom if she has a problem with you coming over, if she says no, ask if she knows of any reason your step dad doesn’t want you to come over. Good luck
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You have every reason to feel hurt, but if you have children… that means you and your kids are going over all the time, plus she has your sisters kid to babysit most of the time. She is probably tired of never getting a break from a house full of kids at all times. Maybe she just wants a break, and some days to herself… which isnt too much to ask for. Id probably talk to my mom about it.
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You should talk to your mom about it and let her know he said not to let her know. If they need time alone then she can tell you herself.
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I’d want to know why he didn’t want me to mention anything to my mum and I’d tell her anyways
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Talk to your mom…if you sit on your hurt feelings resentment will build and drive a wedge b/t you and your mom…better to clear the air and keep in mind that your step dad may have taken it upon himself to say something to you w/o her knowledge
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Talk to your mum to find out the truth.
Maybe call before showing up?
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I’d be calling my mom right up
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Maybe your mom really did say that to your step dad and neither of them really wanted to hurt your feelings, but he felt the need to say something knowing your mom wouldn’t have. This doesn’t 100% guarantee that he’s trying to come between you and your mom. You started this post with “I usually go over to my parents house during the day while my husband works and I’m bored”… not trying to sound mean in any way here, but leave your parents alone lol. Once my kids are grown yes I’ll love their visits, but I’m not going to want them at my house every day. You’re grown… give them a break and go find other things to occupy your time.
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Every day is a bit much. They probably do want time to themselves. Especially if you take your kids also
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So is she feeding all you people all the time. Maybe help them out for a change
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I’m so sorry! That hurts my heart as a mom and as a daughter. I can’t imagine my parents telling me no. They have is they have plans or need a night alone of course but rare. Talk to them as ask what upset them. They are clearly tired but you need to offer to help out. Especially since you are there.
Just take a week break and cut it down to once a week. Ask your mom about it. Maybe he just wants a break. Still ask for help but keep your distance from him.
I talk and see my mother Everyday, she loves it. Talk to your mom.
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Talk to your mother .
I could never tell my kids to not come over whenever they wanted. My home is their home… always.
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Why don’t you feel safe at your Place🤔Do your Children live in a home you do not feel safe in🤔
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My mum is a friend to me. She can kick me out anytime without hurting my feelings… Very honest and direct… i still respect her space and usually i dont stay long when visiting. I left the house when i started university life… almost 20 years ago…
Talk to your mom. I grew up seeing my grandparents on a regular basis. Talked to my mom daily until she got sick and then passed. My dad hangs out at my place a lot now.
It could just be him and he also shouldn’t say “don’t tell your mom”
You’re adults.
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Totally related to this.
Maybe your parents need some space. Adult children don’t seem to understand that! Imagine if you were older in a comfortable home and your parents kept coming over several times a week. I’d bet $ you or your hubby would not be pleased. Parents need their space even though they love you. Respect that and your relationship will improve!
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Talk to your mom. She might feel differently. There’s a lot of people who would love to see their kids twice a week.
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I would just not go over there unless you’re invited
You’re grown. Get out of your mom’s ass. Good lord.
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talk to your mom privately
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Talk to your mom! He’s not your father, only a step dad. What he is saying may be true. However, NOT his place to tell you not to talk to YOUR mother about it
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It sounds like they don’t get much kid /grand kid free time. Talk to your mom.
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communication is big here
Grant the father his wish and when mother asks where you’ve been, tell her what he said.
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Maybe you should mention it to Mom. She may not feel the same. And can I ask how old are they ?
I’d straight up tell your mom. And I’d ask her, not in a rude way but I’d asked her if you going over there is a problem for her? And if she says no then ask her why did he say that? Cause that would piss me off so bad. But if you’re petty like me I’d go to their house and say something in front of him since you and your step dad never had a good relationship anyway. Like that’s not fair at all that they watch your sisters kids all the time but act like this towards you? Honestly it’s probably not your mom that feels like that. So I’d definitely say something to her.
I would talk to your mom anyways. This is just what I personally would do. This would and does make me feel so sad. I can’t imagine how you feel sweetie. I’m sorry that you don’t feel safe either in your home, I truly feel so sorry.
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The minute I left I’d had been on the phone with my mama if she wasn’t home when he said that, if she was home I’d have immediately went and asked her about it. To hell with him
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I would have a conversation with your mom. He could be making it up. Who knows how she really feels
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There could be more going on in your parents home and it’s has nothing to do with you" they may be having problems of there own and don’t want to hash it out in front of the kids or are dilling with an illness that there not ready to tell or scare you with! I get it my door is always open to my child they picked up a habit on there own and always call before they come over and that is very considerate on there part.
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Tell your mom. Sounds like he is the only one who feels this way. He doesn’t want you saying anything because your mom will be mad.
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u should tell your mom!!!
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Maybe turn up with some flowers/chocs, dont mention any help that you need for now and just tell her you love her, leave it with a “call me when you’re free or ready to see me”
Maybe its him that doesn’t want to see you?
When my mum was alive, I would always turn up with something most of the time, just to say that I appreciate her as it does get lost in every day popping round…
Keep in touch with her, even if its by phone for the next week or so, you only get one mum xxx
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Way it was said sound mom was not ask I talk to your mom but I not visit this week
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Bring it up to your mother she needs to know
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Sounds like you wore out your Welcome
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I would’ve called my mom on the spot & not go back there until I got an explanation and an apology
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Maybe you need to go to work?? That should take up some time.
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I would ask mom if she feels that you’re over too much. It sounds like step dad is a trouble maker. If .y daughter came over my house several times a week, I would love it!
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