I want to know if I’m in the wrong here. So my family and I are staying at my husband’s grandparents house. His grandfather has lots of special butbreakable items around the house. Our son is 1, so he’s at that height and into everything at the moment. There’s this one item in particular that our son has gravitated to, it’s this little circle thing with a tea light in the middle, he always wants to grab the tea light out and walk around with it. We haven’t let him touch it, so we move him anytime he goes towards it ever since he grabbed it out the first time. I don’t have to tell you guys how fast babies can be tho lol. The majority of the stuff his grandfather has has been moved away, so I don’t know why this one item in particular was left out in our sons reach. So earlier my sons following me around and I’m trying to take him to the mat to get his diaper changed, he started walking towards me, so I turned around and could hear him walking, and I assumed it was towards me. A second later I heard a crash, and turned around to my son knocked the circle thing on the floor and it smashed. So I say to my husband “this broke” I was upset and embarrassed and I feel bad because our son broke it, and I don’t want it to cause problems with his grandfather. I know it’s probably special to him, and I didnt mean for this to happen obviously, I 100% thought he was coming behind me otherwise I wouldn’t have turned my back. My husband says “it’s fine it’s not your fault I don’t know why something was left out he knows -baby- gets into everything” which I agree with because we’ve had multiple conversations about the baby getting into whatever. So then just now he’s being cold and has an attitude, so I asked him what was wrong, he snapped and said “I don’t know why you let him over there, you know he likes playing with that and now it’s broken and I have to explain like what did you think was gonna happen when he went over there” I was just caught of guard because he said earlier like it’s not my fault and like I said, I never would’ve LET him do it, I thought he was following me, and while I agree it’s my fault I should’ve been watching him, it wasn’t intentional and I don’t like that he’s acting like I was like negligent and just allowed our son to do that while watching him or something. It’s hard chasing a baby around in a place that isn’t baby proofed, especially for 2 weeks. I just walked away from him because obviously he’s mad and not sure how he feels yet because he switched up so quick, and he just got mad at me again for walking away and not talking because I was the one who brought it up. I don’t want to be the one to tell his grandfather because his family and I have had issues before so I don’t really want to put myself in the position and he agreed to communicate to his family about any issues on our behalf basically because it’s not worth the fight of me doing it. So i feel bad that he has to do something because I messed up, but am I wrong for being caught off guard that he was like “it’s not your fault” and then switched to “you let him do that” give me your opinions
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My son broke something at my husbands grandparents house: Advice?
Your in someone else’s home you should be watching his every move or have used your brain an moved it yourself…
Omg, i wasted 2 minutes of my life reading that utter drival, first world problems. If you have to come on the internet to ask strangers for thier opinion on this banal argument i would reassess your marriage.
Keep your kid away from other people’s stuff. Are you teaching him
Honestly neither of you are wrong. Babies are hard to watch. They get into everything. It was an accident and yes it should have been moved. But it’s still the grandparent’s house. He’s allowed to be upset that it broke. I’d apologize with intention and see if there’s anything you can do to make it better
You should be adult enough to tell his grandfather what happened. “The baby knocked the candle off the table and it broke. I’m so sorry that happened, we would like to replace it and I will baby proof the area more.”. This is on you to be responsible. Not your husband.
Babies are so quick, and I would just move anything breakable he can get at for now so it doesn’t happen again. If something was so special to me I would have moved it knowing that it could possibly get broken. I would replace it if that’s possible and move on from it
Not your fault accidents happen.
You’re in his home. It’s not baby proofed bc he’s a great grandad. Not a dad anymore. It is your, and your husband’s job, to keep your child from breaking things.
I know how fast babies are, but you should’ve had him in front of you. Especially knowing he liked that one thing.
Why do I kinda feel like you’re “tattling” on someone? Why did you bring this to Facebook? If this is the only problem you have in your life, you’re gonna be ok! Also, if he kept grabbing it why didn’t you move it out of his reach in the first place?!
Accidents happen. This certainly was NOT intentional. Nobody should be mad. Maybe disappointed that a cherished item was broken, but it isnt really anybody’s fault! An adult could have done the same thing.
I’m sorry
Where was everyone else
Or were you the only one their
Tell your husband to watch his son…plus why do u have to stay for weeks at a place that isn’t safe for a baby…have your husband rent a hotel room
You are in someone’s home. They should not have to move there stuff outta the way of ur baby. I understand I had 3 under 3 n lived with my Nana. But u and ur husband and kid need to move out or u need to keep ur baby in ur baby proof room and take him outside to run n play when he needs to get energy out. My opinion
You guys knew he kept trying to get it and yet neither of you thought to put it up for the duration of your stay ?
People in the comments are rude as hell. She’s just asking for an opinion and accidents happen. Like your children have never broken anything 
kids are like clumsy ninjas
Accidents happen it not anyone fault thing happen when little are around don’t beat yourself up over it they should be thankful no one got hurt 
What does it matter who is at fault? It happened and nothing can change it. All you can do it learn from your mistakes and deal with the aftermath.
Ok I’ll actually answer your only question you put in there since everyone else is picking apart the story and not answering your question.
It wasn’t cool how he switched up the attitude, maybe he figured out it was more important than originally thought 
or is panicking over having to tell grandpa
The Dad wasn’t watching the baby either… so he has to accept equal blame.
I would have snapped back at him and said “I’m sure you would have felt like it was just an accident if it had happened while YOU were watching the baby.”
Do not allow a Man to ever make you feel inferior…they can barely wash their own asses.
My baby is 1, he’s a destroyer, he’s into everything and breaks everything in sight when possible, but he’s a BABY, he’s learning, I only have one pair of eyes & yes they are VERY quick, I actually wouldn’t blame anyone in this situation, it was just an ACCIDENT, I would apologise for the fact its broken and definately offer to replace it. If he’s arsey after that it’s his problem
I never put anything away.I told my kids to teach theirs to not touch.it worked.but have to be consistant
Accidents happen. I’m a grandma and my grands have accidentally broken things. Offer to replace it but move on. Life is too short for pettiness.
Why are you there, headed for trouble. It should of been put up, & yes itching he should talk to his family. Get out
It is impossible to keep your eyes on a toddler 24/7. Impossible. Stuff happens. It is what it is. Let them be mad and just tell yourself you’re doing the best you can. Forget everyone else.
Not ur fault grandpa knew better
I would have walked away too
Get your own house! His house, his stuff. You should be grateful you have a roof over your head!
Accidents happen but maybe offer to replace it. Try to find same one online or something similar to it
Lmao people on here acting as if their eyes were on their kids litterally 24/7 never looked away once😂 accidents happen especially when you have a little one still learning. It was nobody’s fault
On urs n husband’s behalf, if the grandparents were worried about things getting broken their house should’ve been baby proofed before u guys moved in. You can’t put a harness on ur boy as soon as he gets up.
Well he’s not going to talk to me like that. Then u need your own place. NEVER LIVE WITH FAMILY! Especially when you have a child !!
You don’t need to feel bad at all . This is just what babies do ! And let him talk to his grandfather . Maybe the grandfather said something to your Husband that made him feel uncomfortable and that’s why he changed his tune . None the less , babies will be babies and if the item was so special the grandfather should have put it up before you came .
If it was that important to them, they would have put it up in the first place. And if they’re not adult enough to understand that accidents happen then that’s on them that you.
I am a grandmother and shit happens. I have things broken all the time. 
More importantly, what’s going to happen when your son gets hurt, accidentally, while he’s with you?? Is he going to be the same way? Kids get hurt and things get broken. It’s a part of life. It’s not like you handed it to him and said, “here, break it!” Just like you wouldn’t tell him to accidentally get hurt. He’s being immature and needs to get over himself!
Be an adult, tell them now and offer to replace.
Your baby, your responsibility to keep him safe and out of things.
You already knew he wanted to touch it and you knew you were in the area.
Instead of picking him up and taking him to change his diaper you walked away knowing your child and where you were.
As for your husband he’s responsible as well and sounds like he realized that after he told you it wasn’t your fault.
The grandparent knew too and left it out.
So really everyone should own their responsibilities in this.
Move on
Be more careful and keep your baby safer and be thankful he didn’t cut himself
Because it’s more about him then that object.
I love the mentality of passing the blame on to someone else to make yourself feel better. “He’s a baby idk why it was left out.” BECAUSE ITS THEIR HOME. Pay for the item to be replaced and this time use your head and each time you move into that room you be the adult and MOVE it. When you leave put it back. Solves so much.
He wouldn’t have that issue if he bought y’all’s OWN HOUSE ! so therefore it is neither one’s fault accidents happen
I know the feeling of having to watch babies at the homes of relatives who have “pretties” down within reach and just expect you to hover over the kid and be sure they don’t touch anything the whole time you’re at their house. My kids’ father and I spent an extended period of time with his parents when he first got out of the service. She wouldn’t put her stuff up either. I had a playpen for our kids. Our youngest was 4 Months and oldest was 20 months. Our 4 month old was just creeping, but I had to watch her because they had a brick fireplace hearth that stuck up from the floor and I was scared she would fall against it and hit her head. When I would change my son, he would be out of the playpen and would be fast as lightning, trying to get into everything except his toys. I had to stay on him. Before long, the poor kid was so nervous he would cry to get INTO the playpen because it seemed like it was the only place he didn’t get yelled at. When I realized that, I took his father outside and said, “That’s it. We’ve been here 6 months and you haven’t even looked for a job. Either you get a job and get us our own place in two weeks, or the next time you go up the road with your folks, I’m loading the kids and myself out of here and going back to Indiana. There will be a divorce and that will be it!” In 10 days he had a job and had found a rental house about two hours away from his folks. Like it really helped. We moved, but he wanted to visit down there every weekend until I finally refused to load the kids up and go. For Pete’s sake!
I don’t think I would agree to stay there with my toddler. It is impossible to keep every single accident from happening. Is there a hotel nearby that you can stay at instead? Where was your husband when this happened?
Yes it was an accident but Just wondering why you didn’t move it to begin with if he kept getting it🤷♀️
I feel like you guys are projecting your emotions onto each other, heightening each other’s anxiety about the situation. I get that certain situations can be extremely uncomfortable, but part of being a decent human, is accepting responsibility. You should be the one to explain it to his grandpa… it’d be nice if he were there with you… but that is a conversation for you to have with your in law. I’d be upset the way your ol man switched up too though. It’s evident you have some remorse. Calmly explain to him what happened. You can’t control how someone treats you… That is a reflection of their character. How you choose to respond, is a reflection of your own.
Your husband shouldn’t have switched it up . But yes you are at fault . In the last 30 years . I have a house full of glass cows of my grandmothers . Everything at level of toddlers and babies. My eldest granddaughter 19 I helped raise and now a 2&half year old granddaughter. I never child proofed anything. The first time they tried. I only said NO touch . Very firmly and loud . My granddaughter now at home is allowed to use the remote and there cell phones. She isn’t allowed to do that here . She asked me why No touch . I said because it’s grammas not yours . Next time she walked by my remote control she said to herself. Gramma says No touch and kept walking. Now she will point to things and ask me what it is but not touch. She has her toys and a play area . I keep a beach towel on my coffee table . She likes to color there. It’s up to the parent to teach the child not to touch things that aren’t the child’s . In 30 years in this house nothing ever got broke by a child . My husband yes a child no .
Your child has 2 parents…not your fault where was he when it happened
If it were my kid and saw he was drawn to it…I would have moved it away and out of sight!
My sons are notorious for destroying things. I do my best but no matter how vigilant you are, kids are sneaky & fast. I feel bad when they break stuff too, but we offer to replace it & I have my husband talk to his family, & I have a great relationship with my mother in law, so I’ll tell her too sometimes. We moved in with her during covid, & my father in law <my husband’s stepdad> has been pushing us out ever since, but he’s a major douchebag & that’s a story for another time.
Anyway, point being, your husband shouldn’t have switched up like that, but he is probably nervous bout tellin his dad. Why the grandparents put up everything else except that, I have no idea, but at least you do feel guilty. I’m sure your husband will apologize to you later for the attitude. He knows it was an accident.
He’s gonna have his feelings about it, it’s a frustrating accident and now he’s stuck explaining it since you already don’t get along with his family. Let him go thru it and expect more attitude.
Dude I’m sorry but ya, you are at fault. So it wasn’t moved. YOU are the adult. YOU knew it was in the area. So why turn AWAY from him. Why not walk WITH him and WATCH him. It’s not your house. It’s not your stuff. You are a guest. And ESPECIALLY if y’all already have issues, you are setting yourself up to have more. So either you are just that naive or you are selfish and self centered 
It’s his child too he can take care
You guys should move out if you can’t adhere to their standards. You know your child will break these sensitive items, then you knew that you should be extra mindful of his movements.
No biggie, grandparents love their grandkids. Your over thinking it
I would just ask if it’s replaceable and what could I do to make it right and then always make sure things were out of reach in the future
Why anyone would need advice with this 
You’re in his house. Why should he have to move things and change things around ?
This is an ornament NOT the crown jewels…yes we get sentimental about things but my main concern would be the baby hadn’t hurt himself instead of shaming the parents…lovely being perfect😔
Wheneve our human wrecking ball had broken anything we always offer to pay to have it replaced as long as that is a possiblity of replacing said item. But my mom is adamant about anything that is eye level for a kid that gets broke is her fault for not moving it up. Her words kids are clumsy and touch stuff they always shouldn’t and if you don’t want it broke move it. So anything that is left out is ok to be touched in her eyes. I have a cardinal rule for my son you break you buy and he knows what i am really saying is whatever you do… Do not touch that lol mind you mine is 7 now but he is like a little fricken tornado
You bring it upto his grandparents. Don’t wait. And hold that baby on way to disper change. Go around pick up stuff he will break move stuff. Girl as a mom myself I had to do it many times
Between two adults… you both couldn’t have grabbed this object and moved it before the inevitable happened
Then do not stay there. They are their belongings in their home and they already have issues with you. Plus you already know baby is GOING to get into things, it is what babies do. It’s time for you and your family to go find your own place to stay outside of their home.
Some interesting comments. I’m fairly sure your husband was reacting to the fear of his grandparent and how he would react. Trying to keep an eye on a 1 yr old is like roping the wind. Here in AZ babies drown in pools in seconds if not watched. So, just be glad the grandparents don’t live in AZ and have a pool.
In other words shit happens
Yeah that’s odd of him to switch up. Maybe it’s because he had time to think about it.
Try to remedy the situation the best you can. Maybe replace the item? Or financially reimburse the grandfather?
Sounds like he’s anxious about telling the grandfather. A lot of men’s anxiety is turned into anger. But it’s not your fault. I think from now on someone needs to move anything of value or sentimental thats breakable or that he gravitates towards.
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It’s their house they shouldn’t have to change it for u, watch ur child or get ur own place
Why are you and your family staying there…grandad shouldn’t have to move his stuff…see it from his point of view and move out…he’s done raising a family…move out and raise yours …
If your husband thinks he’s able to watch your 1 yr 100% of the time with zero issues let him. Screw this noise. HES 1. The grandparent has obviously has children and it’s NOT your fault he wasn’t more responsible with HIS belongings.
own up to it and pay for the item.
Kids are kids and accidents happen. I would tell the grandparent yourself and have the child with you to learn.
Your man had time to think great now I have to be the one to tell them and he is probably upset.
Most grandparents will understand. Have you tried to find the piece that was broke on Amazon or somewhere to replace it
Kids can get into stuff even when adult is in same room. He’s a baby, so much more to get into stuff. So, he broke something that was a treasure, apparently, but if can be replaced, that’s what I would do if it were me. If it can’t be replaced, what more can one do? Maybe husband got upset and may be scared to approach it with the grandfather? It’s already been said there were issues with family before. I have found that, depending on family dynamics, when something needs to be broached with in-laws, it may work better if it is the direct family member that does it. Grandpa may get upset, but not stay mad if it were him. If she does it if has already had “issues,” he may/may not get over it as much, as desired, or as expected. In-law issues may be more negative, at times and may lead to more “issues,” especially with the in-law. The post does not say if this is a temporary live-in arrangement, as in just visiting. If permanent, there may be future issues. If doable, if it were me, post haste I’d be looking for my own place. I’m glad to hear the baby was not hurt.
EDIT: MY APOLOGIES. I mistakenly misread you aren’t living there and only staying here two weeks. It obviously got a reader’s panties in a twist to the point she had to be a twatwaffle. However the rest of my post still applies. Plus the obvious I would like to add either way, don’t go to their house to often after you leave.
Is is possible he went and talked to the grandfather and it didn’t go well so that’s why he came back at you like that? Doesn’t make it right. Sounds like y’all really need to get out of there and get your own place asap. It’s obviously putting a strain on your marriage. Then, maybe some counciling for you and your husband afterwards. Yes, you are guests in their home and yall should respect it, but accidents happen. And that’s their grandchild for crying out loud. What kind of grandparents are they? Definitely apologize and offer to replace it. Make a plan to get out fast.
If it was sooo spcial, It should have been put up high
My head hurt just reading this. You are living as a guest in someone’s house. It’s your responsibility to keep your child from damaging others property. Feelings aside, Own up to it, offer to pay for it, and keep a better eye on your kid.
Why is it so hard to be grateful? Not your house not your things but between two of you no one could hold a hand to the mat??? Then you lol like it’s funny it’s not funny you and baby daddy need to get out of this old man’s house do you think this is the last of this kind of thing because it’s not it’s the beginning especially with two people who know how their kid acts but don’t keep a good enough eye on him y’all need to go…
You did nothing wrong, the baby did nothing wrong, husband is being an ass, if grandparents get mad they are asses too …
Why are you there for 2 weeks? Why does your husband havin angrr issues? Why are you afraid of confronting grandpa? This goes way deeper than a broken item.
I never baby proofed my own house. Let alone expecting others to do so… but if I had something o
I didn’t want broke by the child or one of my pets. It’s put in a safe place.
All items are replaceable… even if some hold sentimental meaning. Are the grandparents so old they don’t remember having children? Unlikely… everyone just needs to move on.
Would have been better if you moved it yourself so he couldn’t have reached it . little ones get into everything .but it was an accident .have a word with them say how sorry you are and that your really upset it got broke they would appreciate it more I’m sure with your honesty.
Its probably hard to find but perhaps try replacing it with something similar or offering to pay for it.
Seniors come from a time when it was expected that children (even babies) were seen and not heard. Mothers were forced with the task of literally keeping everything ship-shape including the children and gramps may expect that from you seeing as he likely was a provider but didn’t mind the children like his wife was expected to. Obviously, its his home and you shouldn’t expect special treatment like moving valuables lol… but it happens so make amends as best you can and try and get outta there Because kids are crafty and it will likely happen again.
It’s their house and while things are better to be put away they don’t have to do it. Obviously it wasn’t done intentionally. Maybe you guys should offer to pay for it. If it’s really a big deal I wouldn’t stay there anymore since breakables aren’t put away unless your husband wants to watch your child 24/7 to make sure it doesn’t happen again.
This is simple. Don’t go back. No one can be on alert 100% of the time. F*@k that old angry geezer.
Your responsibility to keep an eye on your child. I would offer to pay for it or see if u can replace it
Accidents happen unfortunately just one of those things it’s noones fault
Had you been watching him it wouldn’t have gotten broken…. You should tell his grandparents
Accidents happen. Especially with kids. Your husband is also to blame, why was it only on you to watch your son? I would offer to pay for it and apologize but your husband is being a child. Had he also been parenting maybe it wouldn’t have happened 
Sounds like your man is probably scared himself and overthinking it like you are. I would just own up and be honest and offer to replace it. What more can you do? Babies brake things. My little girl has broke most my mums ornaments as she was just too fast but it was an accident. My mum did put what she didn’t want broken up out of reach or locked away from her in the end:rofl:
. Good luck anyway in hope you handle it but honestly don’t overthink it xx
Don’t feel bad My oldest daughter (not bio grandchildren) broke my in laws whole fucking window when they just got it installed. I was mortified! Thankfully they are understanding people and knew it was a complete accident. I’d explain to them what happened and then tell your husband he’s needs to have his eyes on baby at all times also.
His grandfather should not have to baby proof his house. It’s his house and not his responsibility to move his personal belongings to accommodate others.
Whoever was with the child when this happened is responsible for speaking with the grandfather and offering to replace the item.
Why would you not move it,if it’s only a little candle holder thing? I worked that out the first time you mentioned it.I don’t get it tbh sorry
I’m a grandmother and I remember when my girls where one and the uncomfortable feeling trying to make sure they didn’t break anything…I chose to pick up a few things that meant something or breakable when my grandchildren were that age to avoid what happened to this gal. By two they were able to understand not to touch. I wanted my children to be comfortable and love coming to my house, not being stressed and worried. It was worth putting those few items out reach for a few months!
It is their house. And NO it is NOT too hard to watch your child 100%, especially in a home that has offered you and your child a place to stay. It would have been just as SIMPLE for you to move it OUT of the babies reach. I HAVE A 1 YEAR OLD. AND IT IS MY ACCOUNTABILITY, AS YOURS. This is petty of you, and your husband is correct… Own up to your responsibility as a mother and also as a family member… Do NOT force your husband to be the bad guy… Simple solution, be honest… And watch your child around other people’s sentimental items… I see this as LAZY parenting skills… Also footsteps coming and going sound NOTHING alike… You just wanted the baby to do half of your job. Maybe pick up your child also when it is time to change… This is 100% your problem that you created and allowed to happen on YOUR WATCH. Not the babies problem, husband’s, or grandparents who are providing a sheltered home for your family… Parenting classes may do you some good hun.
If you all knew he could reach it why not place it higher up yourselves ?
Seems no one wants to be responsible.
First off everything has a time to die! I went to our neighbors house when my son was 1 and he was crawling and walking around I kept just holding him even though he was crying to get down. My neighbor told me to put him down that it would be fine. I told her I don’t want him to break anything as she has fine China and glass nicknacks all over. She told me if he breaks something, it is ots time to die, just like anyone or anything else. Everything has a time to go. I really liked her view and appreciated how kind she was. He didn’t break anything but he did grab her stuff off the table and hold and play with it and it made me so nervous but she assured me it woukd be okay. The point is tell his grandparents to fuck off it broke oh well.
People shouldn’t have to move things or baby proof their house to accommodate you. Grandpa has stuff that he loves and he’s probably rightfully upset. You could have moved your son to the matt to change him. Babies are easily distracted and don’t know any better so it is 100% on you.
All the “it wouldn’t have happened if you were watching him” screams miserable helicopter parent… how dare she take her eyes of her child for even a SECOND, my goodness the absolute treachery😰
Especially in a family home that should be a safe comfortable space for everyone😂
I think daddy also should have been keeping an eye on the little guy!
Wow that’s way too much writing for what the point was. Offer to replace the item, say sorry, do not feel bad and tell your husband to stop. Move on. I’m sure grandpa understands and isn’t going to be mad.
I would just talk to the grandpa. He obviously has had kids in his life and grandparents are usually pretty understanding.