Why did he take that dna test anyways? Does he have different features to second guess himself or is he different from other siblings if he has them ?
Truth - lies will only make it worse
It’s better for him to know the truth
prayers honey truth will set you all free
Tell him the truth. 
Tell him the honest truth!!
Don’t lie. Tell the truth.
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Agree with all other comments, tell him the truth… as heartbreaking as the truth may be, a lie will be sooooo much worse
BUT what if he actually is your husbands ? You didn’t do a DNA test then so you aren’t entirely sure which way this could go
As hard as it is, you have to tell him the truth. Don’t let him find out any other way. He deserves the truth.
Also therapy for everyone.
Sending you love & light 
You should tell him. … so he doesn’t hold resentments later… God will carry you through the rest
Dont say you cheated… You are a brave strong woman and that belittles you and your husband… Say the truth if you are asked as hard as that would be. Sometimes blessings come from terrible things and he sounds like an amazing young man and make sure you and hubby have this conversation together. Xxx
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I would just tail him the true
Be honest with him. If its something that you arent comfortable with sharing with him, let him know you arent ready to talk about it, but you love him dearly. The past doesn’t define your relationship with your son!
I wouldn’t tell him…. I have two sons and I would rather tell him I cheated because telling him you were assaulted will cause so much psychological pain for him… the hurt for his mother will be traumatizing and the undeniable torture he will always face will be him wondering and being terrified if he is just like that man that hurt you.
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As long as you and your husband don’t do the same test, he wouldn’t know.
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Praying for you for wisdom
Don’t try to make it better with a lie because that will also come to light and he will be hurt even more. Its time to tell him when he asks you, or you can approach him about it. He may hurt for awhile but more than likely will understand where y’all came from hiding it from him.
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Always tell the truth, even if it does hurt. You raised him to be strong, he will get through it with you.
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If somehow he were to find out, it would be a huge testament to you and your husbands love for him. You had other options besides keeping and raising him. I commend you for your decision. Learning of the assault and the potential for that to be his conception, would show just how genuine your love is for him. And how genuinely your husband loves him.
Side note: if you haven’t done a DNA test, are you sure he wasn’t conceived through your husband? It sounds like you two may not be sure, but that the information didn’t alter the love you held for this precious unborn child.
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the truth will set you free . dont lie
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Honesty and truth are always the best options
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Honesty is always best! He is going to find out. He’d rather hear it from you.
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Don’t lie to him. Be honest! It’s going to hurt but it’s also going to make him better and respect women so much more than he already does! Lying is just going to be terrible because if he ever does find out the truth and want to find his dad it’s going to be terrible for you.
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Telling him you cheated on his Dad will likely hurt him more then him knowing you were assaulted. He would never look at you the same…. Maybe not more, but differently. I would spill the beans honestly. He’s a grown man at this point and would likely rather hear it from you, than a blood test. 
I’m sure he will still appreciate that his current Dad didn’t want to know whether he was actually his son or not, and chose to love him as his regardless.
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I will just sit down with him and your husband and y’all tell him what happened give him time to process it it will probably hurt real bad when he hears the truth but he needs to know why does something happen to him and he needed blood or something kidney heart his father’s family history of medical problems it’s always best to tell the truth he should after some time he will process it and come to grips with it so pray about it and when you think the time is right set them down and talk to him
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why does your son need to know how he come to be? You love him, his ‘dad’ loves him, And for that alone, you should be very grateful, Let it be, If he ask, which I really can’t imagine why, unless he did a DNA testing… then tell him something bad happened to you, not him, but something good came from it
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I feel like you should just tel him the truth. Ik it will prob hurt but he’s a grown up. The truth will set you free. Your husband & you obviously did a great job by him & the fact he came from an assault never got in the way of raising him. He is old enough to deal with it. Best of luck
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If it comes to that but don’t lie about it. It could effect what your son may think of you if you lied and said you cheated.
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O yes it’s all about YOU!! Keep your DAM mouth shut at this point what does it matter he’s 24 why Ruin his life at this point don’t No listen to each other damn fools ! Wait a minute if you tell them you’re a damn fool
If you lie it will be worse if he finds out. Just tell the truth. Huggs
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Tell the truth! It took sperm to become a “father”, unconditional love has came from his Dad, that’s priceless 
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The truth will come out. I would want to be the one who shares it with him.
Have you considered the possibility that knowing what you experienced could be a catalyst for him to fulfill his calling? It may ignite his soul as an advocate and he will be an amazing source of strength for others.
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Tell him only if he asked
Why doesn’t your husband do a test and check the results to be 
that he’s not the father first…match the ancestry code at the bottom of the report.to your husband’s.you never know until it’s there…hope for the best and good luck…
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Tell him the truth before he finds out on his own…he trusts u dont break that trust by being caught in a lie…it will be worse on him…dont cover up a lie with another…and with this post he probably already knows
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I understand where you are coming from please contact me
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Shit that’s a tough situation. Talk to him before he gets the test back…
He’s an adult just be honest with him. Don’t lie about cheating that would be worse.
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Sit him down and tell him the truth and let him know that you and your husband love him. Don’t tell him a lie, as that will make things worse.
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do not lie, if he finds out talk to him but absolutely do not lie
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I say tell him the truth time has a way of healing all things:woman_shrugging:
I’d wait to see if he approaches you then just be honest. It’s not your fault and you never asked for it to happen but let him know he is loved regardless.
Tell the truth. You obviously don’t love him any less because of it! You’re going to great lengths to spare his feelings. I think it will be a shock. He knows who his real parents are though and how much you both very clearly adore him!
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Just tell him the truth, no one likes being lied to
Don’t lie. Get therapy so you can tell him the right way. Wait for the results first then go from there
The truth is so much better than that lie! He has been love and cared for all his life! He is 24 and is ready to hear the truth from both you and your husband! Plus you lying to him would destroyed his whole world of been in a loving home! I don’t know about you but thinking that my mom cheated on my dad is just not okay! You will shattered his world! Like you said he may or may not be your husbands!
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Ur partner could be his dad? Doesn’t it say that ur not sure?
But you dont know that your husband isnt the father. Either one could be
I’m not sure those tests are all accurate- maybe google some info on that?
As hard as it is, u should tell him the truth. People get tangled in a web of lies and holes on the story dont add up and he will be more hurt u lied to try cover it up. As long as he knows the father that raised and loved him is his real dad. Biology doesn’t make a dad
How stressful. I’m sorry you’ve had to live with that all this time. I don’t have any first hand experience or wisdom to share with you…. But putting myself in your son’s shoes makes me think I would rather hear it from you than to read it on a piece of paper and be flooded by questions and emotions. I’m so sorry you’re having to relive that awful experience. Hoping for a peaceful conclusion.
Is it possible you Husband is the dad? X
Truth spoken gently. Please.
Tell him the truth if he’s on ancestry he could possibly find out the person and their age etc and would know you lied then about cheating. You could tell him minimals info that dad isn’t bio dad and you would rather not speak about the situation etc. He’s 24 he will likely be torn inside for what you went through. I would tell him the truth and tell.him how much you love him and how much his dad loves him etc.
Also I wouldn’t say anything untill you know either way if husband is bio dad or not you could be worrying over nothing he might indeed be his bio dad.
Sit him down and talk with him. Let him know it’s an important conversation. Do it fast and be there for him.
You tell him what a great father he has. He showed he was a true man and loved you and the child you carried. That’s “Father of the year”. My husband was 54 when he was told who his real father was. The person he thought was his real dad left when he was 4 mo old. He never got to talk to him but found out he had siblings. It should be your sons choice and hopefully he will realize how fortunate he was to have such loving parents.
Tell him. As someone who found out that his father wasn’t his biological father after having my mother and father pass away, it’s important to know the truth. Because the unanswered questions are not something you or he wants to deal with. The truth will set you and him free!
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If you tell him you cheated then he may go looking for his father. I’m not sure you want that
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No lies ! The DNA test will cause him a lot of confusion. You need to address that. Sit him down and tell the truth, how much your husband loved and cared for you, how much you both loved him and how blessed you felt to raise him together. He will accept your truthful explanation but he may be angry for you but not at you. Assure him you never intended to cause him distress but that you truly thought you were protecting him. Good luck.
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My dad was a rapist with 20 other kids and my advice is to tell him the truth.
She didn’t cheat… she was ASSAULTED!
You should tell him. He’s going to discover something from that test. I think he’ll be more understanding if you address it first. Being honest will help you both & while uncomfortable to discuss sexual assault, it can be healing.
Always ask yourself, how does this information benefit my child? Not all truths need be spoken.
Tell him the truth. If he thinks his bio dad is a good person and wants info to look him up… do you really want your son to have a relationship with this person?
Be honest with him.
He was the collateral beauty that came from your horrible ugly assault. Tell him that he saved you. He is a gift.
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Tell the whole truth. The fact that you and his father love him regardless of his conception is the point you need to make very clear. It never changed the way you embraced him or your pregnancy and that’s huge! You didn’t show him any resentment and that will go very far in him processing the reality of his birth and conception. Maybe set up time to speak to a counselor before hand for advice and after for the 3 of you. Good luck to you all
Find a very good therapist to talk with. You, your husband and your son will need on-going counseling.
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Truth is always best. He may be hurt that you held this from him but eventually he will understand you did it to protect him
I would personally tell him the truth!! Maybe he’ll look for his bio dad thinking he’s a great guy but in reality assaulted you!!
Truth and DNA thing is not specific it just gives you generalisation of country
You are very brave that you kept the baby, it must have been very traumatic… Don’t say you cheated! That is the worst thing you could do & it will cause resentment! You don’t have to say it was from assault either. If it were me, I would either say he was the result of a prior relationship that didn’t work out & his father raised him as his own or used a sperm donor & his father loved & raised him as his own!
He may resent you if you tell him you cheated. This is so hard, trying to think what i would do. You may be better off telling him first because it’s better honesty comes from loved on not having to have to ask questions
Guessing the Truth is always the Best!!?? Don’t say anything unless asked. Then you and husband talk to him privately. It’s no one’s Business but your family’s. Praying for you All!
You said your husband never took a DNA…how do you know it is from the assault and not your husband? I first would have husband take dna. This may be nothing to worry about. If it comes back that he is not his biological father then it will be stressful. Pray over this. I know it would be hard. Prayers for you and your family
He and his father are that close and he thinks you cheated he may hate you rather than the act that was done to you. The fact you chose to keep him and together raised him will mean so much to him. Let him hate who did the act to you,dont make him hate you for a lie. If you are all that close,he knows hes loved. Sit him down together and talk to him. Have you had a dna test done? What I read is your husband didnt want a dna test cuz it didnt matter to him,so you both knew the possibility,but then the possibility is also there for him to be your husbands.
Tell him! You have nothing to be ashamed of…you were assaulted!!
He knows that his parents wanted him and love him , that’s what’s important.
Someday he might have a heath issue and you don’t want him to find out that way.
Better to tell the truth . you wouldn’t want to have him looking for a person who may feel they are a missing loved one.
The truth is always the best route .
That’s a hard situation tell him the truth tell him you didn’t believe in abortion and you and your husband raise him to be a good man the best that you and your husband could if you say you cheated he might not talk to you again I think if you’re truthful it will be better then to lie.
Love concurs everything
Lying NEVER NEVER NEVER helps. You haven’t lied to him yet. I suggest you and your husband tell him you have something real real special to tell him and get the three of you together and talk about how you love him so very very much but now that he is as old as he is there’s something else he needs to know so that he can know that he is loved so very much possibly by more than just the two of you. Then let him know there is possibly somebody else that loves him very much too and then tell him all about it, and make sure that you do not leave him thinking that he comes from a horrible horrible person because that really knocks people down a lot. I don’t know if you’re still in contact with that person or if he even knows him but if there’s anything good about that person you and your husband need to let your son know that his biological father is also a good person and it was a very very unfortunate thing that happened. By all means let him know that he’s come from good stock, even though we do not like to think of rapists as good stock, but if there is something good that you can say, say it, so that he knows that. Reinforce the fact that he could not have been loved more had he been propagated by your husband who does love him so very very much. Then offer to help him get in touch with his biological father, and have a chance to meet him because that’s very important. If the biological father is a scoundrel yet to this day then I would suggest that you tell him you would be willing to have the meeting to be one where the 2 of you would be happy to go along, at least to begin with. In thinking further, if the biological father is a scoundrel to this day, I would be careful about encouraging meeting alone at least for the first time. Of course your son is an adult, in either case he can make up his own mind about that, but by all means do not lie, tell him like it is, let him know that you believe he is good and has inhereited the best part of the genes even though it was an unfortunate beginning. He has a right to believe that he comes from good genes. Do this QUICKLY BEFORE he gets his results.
IF there is a chance at all that that the two of you have the possibility of being his biological parent, then tell him you are willing to get the tests, too, just in case there is a possibility that the rapist is not the father.
If we were all caught up for our sins of the past it would all turn into a pretty bad mess trying to figure everything out!
I know of two couples who were real good friends and one of the men got the other man’s wife pregnant. They all four sat down and talked it over, decided she would carry the child and she and her husband would keep him and raise him and the bilogical father and his wife would have equal access, the truth always up front, no hiding, and they all remained friends and, as they say, “lived happily ever after”! The child grew up to excell in school and social life, great in all ways. It is a lovely solution to behold. If your son’s biological father has got his act together, perhaps there can be a real happy solution here.
Cooperation beats competition any day!
Anyway, I wish you well, and may God richly bless you.
He’s 24, not 9 or 10… I’m pretty sure he would be more accepting of the truth. It ALWAYS comes out anyways and it’s going to be even worse when he finds out you lied. HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY.
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The truth is that even if your husband isn’t biologically his dad he is his dad in every way possible. He was there, he loves him , and has been there every step of the way and chose to be there regardless of the situation, and he knew the truth and did not care and loves you and his son. Because he never looked at him as if he were not his son . You both chose to be parents and a family even though most would have chosen a different path . That makes you both amazing people in my opinion. And I’m thinking that your son knows that as well . I would sit him down before the results come back and tell him the truth and that you wanted him to know before he found out any other way and that it doesn’t matter because you both are his parents and never saw it any other way . I have a feeling he was loved enough to be grounded with the truth xoxo and good luck!
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Tell him the truth. He will be more hurt if you continue to hide information from or lie to him. It will probably be the hardest family discussion you’ve ever had, but he deserves to know.
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Please tell the truth. If nothing else, keep in mind any health issues that could pop up from the trash human’s side that may impact his future.
Your son sounds pretty smart so he’s gonna find out if he really wants to.
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Do not lie hes 24 its time to tell him that is ur son and u need to trust that je will ne there for u likenu habe been for him
If he comes asking questions for the lo e of Jesus do not tell him u cheated he will hate u .if u can’t tell him have ur husband talk to him and auntie cousin someone
A great thing came from a horrible thing
Don’t lie he deserves to know the truth. You kept him and raised him right. Protecting your rapist is not the way