I am having the absolute worst time breastfeeding my 10 month old. He’s just so…“violent”. The pinching and twisting and head bashing and switching sides and the positions he demands are really starting to wear down on me mentally. I’m becoming extremely agitated and I dread the next time I’ll have to nurse him. I don’t want to be touched at all now. I’m arguing with my partner more and I’m feeling so resentful towards everything. There’s so much pressure to continue breastfeeding and I can’t imagine hearing my son cry and denying him his breastmilk. I’m so torn about this, what would you do?
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My son is violent while breastfeeding: Advice?
Pump and give in a bottle. You only have technically 2 more months till you don’t even have to. He’s not stupid. He knows what he’s doing
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Pump and bottle feed him
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I agree with pumping. I breastfed the longest to 8 months. They’ll be fine!
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10 months is a good run your only 2 months shy of a year. Give him formula until you switch to cows milk! You did good
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I would try pumping maybe to see if that would make things easier with u. if u want to nurse maybe if he starts doing it unlatch him and put it away until he’s ready again
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Just pump. He still gets the breastmilk…
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I would pump and give him a bottle.
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You either try and work with him to be better and more gentle, or you give it up.
I personally wouldn’t deal with it. It’s not worth feeling all of that when there are other methods.
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Start pumping. I pumped from 9.5-16 months exclusively because my daughter bit and drew blood…I couldnt take that pain more than twice lol
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Pump and bottle feed, or start formula, 10 months is old enough to switch.
I found putting milk into a straw cup worked better than a bottle
If it’s too much for you, it’s okay to stop. Start giving him bottles one feeding at a time over a few days. Then another feeding becomes a bottle feeding. He’s not too young for you to set limits with his behavior. If he acts violent, the breast feeding stops. Period.
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It’s natural and normal. In fact, it’s actually an instinctual way of sending the signal to your breasts to make more milk. If you have ever watched animals, they do the same type of thing. I raised milk goats, and a good way to get them to produce more is to give them a good solid nudge while milking. Your son may be going through a growth spurt and actually needing and therefore demanding more milk.
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I would tell him something like “ouch that hurts” then When he does it again stop nursing say “mama won’t nurse while you hurt her” and set him down for 2 mins and just walk away then try again. It took my son a few times of this to learn some nursing manors
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Either pump and give it via bottle or use a formula… you have done well to get them to 10 months
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He’s not too young to spat his bottom! He will know you are unhappy with him but you won’t really hurt him, just his feelings! Pump and give him a bottle!
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I would tell him no we don’t do that be nice and close up shop. Offer back once some time passed and continue to let him know that behavior is unacceptable. They are smart and will catch on and you will change that behavior. This will come in handy with other things that he shouldn’t be doing. Good luck momma you got this
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Pump and give him a sippy cup
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It’s okay to stop mama! You can always pump and give it to him in a bottle!
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I would definitely try pumping! I hope things get better for the both of you! 
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Pump, 100%. You need to take care of you. I breastfed both of mine, I’m pro-breastfeeding, but I’m also pro-mom.
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Any action you don’t like, unlatch and stop. Each time, every time. He will eventually get the hint.
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Pump and put it in a bottle
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You can stop, you did well to get this far. I stopped breastfeeding at 16 months after my son bit me and drew blood. I bought stop and grow and painted it on my nipples.
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A fed baby is a happy baby. Regardless how
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At this point, he’s probably getting bored and wants to see whats going on around him. Thats what happened with us. My daughter started pulling (with 6 teeth) at 6 months, so we stopped latching then. Pump and give the bottle. There is nothing that says you have to EBF the entire time. If you start out and switch, that’s great! If you’re like me and had to supplement from the beginning, breast and bottle is good too. If you have worse luck with your supply than I did and get none, formula is great too! Whatever gets your baby fed and keeps your sanity & bonding going forward. You do what works for you!
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If you’re wanting to be done breastfeeding, I used goats milk with my 3rd until she was about 18 months. I still breastfed a little, but I didn’t have much of a supply, she was eating a lot of solids by then anyway. But if you do want to continue, everytime baby does something uncomfortable unlatch immediately, or give them something that they can pull on with their fingers. Like a hair tie? Ya know something small but fidgety. I’m still breastfeeding my almost 2 year old and I’m getting pretty fed up a lot here lately. He only nurses maybe 3 times a day but man he’s rough and once he starts getting rough I just unlatch him and lay with him. He understands me when I say ouch, that hurts. So I’ll say ouch you’re being too rough man and unlatch him and then he’s either done or he’s more gentle lol but he’s my last baby and I’m not sure if I’m completely done yet. So as long as he listens to me I’m gonna keep going a little bit longer. But if you decide you’re done there’s no shame in that. Babys old enough for solids, they can get their nutrition in other ways besides breastmilk. You done a great job!!
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It’s normal. Head butting is to encourage milk. Twiddling/twisting/pinching is something most do. Just say no in way that kind of shocks him and let’s him know you don’t like it.
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Pump and wean his age doesn’t require your milk per say. He will be okay if you do what’s best for you too.
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Good time to start teaching him boundaries and how to be gentle to mom. When. He acts like this. Stop 
and sit him aside and tell him no. Not until he is nice a calm /nice ect. Use sweet tone gentle parenting and keep repeating until he gets it. It will/can be frustrating but this is more than one lesson you’ll be teaching him. Just because he’s a baby dosen’t mean it’s ok to be abusive and mean to you. Your mom and food! He need to know there are rules. Set them ASAP!
My daughter had a bit of trouble with my granddaughter not quite to this extent, but as soon as she started acting up instantly she stopped until she was nice! After a bit they got it together my daughter is a hero and breastfeed her for a little over 2 full years! I’m so proud of her!
You got this.
Keep up the great work!
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Try pumping. It that doesn’t work, then just stop. Babies are extremely resilient and will adjust in time. It’s not worth losing your mental health over. I chose to formula feed my daughter after my son for this exact reason and it was so peaceful and easy.
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Get bottles and nipples that are shaped like breast nipples and pump. Rubber nipples are not recommended…
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Express and bottle feed
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When ever he is not nursing with nice manners unlatch and put the boob away. Offer it again in a little bit when he’s calm again. Be consistent
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You can’t have a happy baby if you’re not happy Momma. Do what you need to do for you. Hang in there
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Could you pump and bottle feed him breast milk?
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Pumping is one option, another is to unlatch when he does things that hurt.
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I’d say it’s time to stop. Mine were starting to use a cup and bottle at bed time at this age. But that was just me, my kids did everything early. Good luck
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Maybe try pumping and giving him a bottle most of the day and nurse at bed time if that’s something you think youd like to do
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What does the doctor say?
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Formula in a bottle. Fed is best.
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Almost a year can be changed over to normal milk anyhow. Start now
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My daughter switched to pumping and giving a bottle to fix this problem.
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Mama, you need an expert!!
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Bottle feed that kid he will be fine. You can even pump so he’s still getting breastmilk
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I would switch to bottles. Either pumping or formula. Happy babies need happy mommies 
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Pump then give it in a bottle. Or wean completely.
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Pump! He still gets the benefits but you cab take a break and dad can help with feeding 
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All these people yelling formula. What? A baby pinching and squeezing, etc is normal. You correct it as you go, have him stop and unlatch and wait until he’s calm to put him back on.
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The pinching is the worse! 
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I would pump. And if that didn’t work, I’d transition to formula for the last few months.
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Pump and maybe look into seeing someone for some post partum therapy for yourself
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Time to stop breastfeeding.
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Pump or switch to formula… ain’t no way I’d be able to continue to breastfeed with a child like that. My daughter was doing similar and I had to cut her off cold Turkey bc that was the only way…
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Express and put it in a bottle.
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I had an issue with my son around the same age with biting- HARD. He cut his first tooth at 4 months, so he had quite a few by then, too. He would leave literally horrible cuts on me and they even got infected at one point. I almost gave up BFing even though he was my 3rd and last baby and I so wanted to continue, the pain was unbearable and I felt emotionally and physically drained. I would take him off of my breast every time he bit me and say “ouch! No, that hurts mama, if you’re going to bite me then I won’t be able to breastfeed you.” Then put my boob away for a couple mins and try again. Eventually he got the hint and stopped and I was able to BF until he was almost 3. However, I had SEVERE PPD/PPA with my 2nd child and I HAD to go on medication and stop BFing because it was wearing me down even more mentally and I was exhausted and drained from it. I got into a very dark place. I felt I didn’t even connect with my daughter until she was nearly a year old because of it (I had to stop BFing at 9 months). It sounds as though you could be struggling with PPD or PPA and if that’s the case, it’s best for you and baby to wean, if you think it’s part of the cause of your anxiety. You can’t let it get you to the point of feeling this awful for you. If you think you can try taking your breast away when he hurts you, then do that for awhile and if he stops and you’re okay with BFing without the pain, that’s your choice, but if it doesn’t stop, I think it may be time to end BFing. Maybe consult with your/his doctor and a BFing consultant, if you’re really set on continuing, but if you’re not, you need to give yourself a break. 10 months is amazing! He will be perfectly okay if you have to switch to formula or pumped milk. My daughter weaned pretty easily and my being a happier mom, made her a happier baby. You will be okay and he will be okay, whatever you need/choose to do. I think considering therapy may be a good option either way, because it’s okay to accept that you need extra support right now and there is zero shame in that. You need to be okay for your son to be okay 
good luck, mama!
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Time to put it in a bottle then
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Pump and bottle feed.
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When he starts to become “violent” just stop and tell him no. Start again and when it happens again, stop and tell him no. Keep this up and within a couple of days, he will get the hang of being more gentle when nursing.
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Hi hun,
Id suggest seeing a professional. They’ll have some great tips and tricks to dealing with the behaviours you’re experiencing but do please know that you’re not denying your child anything by switching to formula or expressed milk. Becoming so stressed about feeds isn’t good for you or for baby so please be kind on yourself and think about where you’d like to go from here.
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Formula! Fed is best. He’s 10 months old now. He’ll be fine and you’ll be happier too
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Being that he is 10 months old. I’d say pump and try giving a sippy cup rather than a bottle.
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Time to switch to a bottle
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Ok hear me out. My mom breastfed 8 children. To get them to stop she put something distasteful on her n*ple. She said we all stopped right away. Try that. Then offer him a bottle instead.
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If breastmilk is something you want to continue then I’d say pump. If you can’t pump then switch to formula. He’s old enough to switch to mostly baby food anyways. At this point the kiddo has had the import breastmilk feeding time to have the healthy benefits from it. You’re mental health is most important, especially if he’s being fed either way.
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When my kids got teeth and I couldn’t get them to stop biting my daughter was 8 months and had all her front teeth my son was 10 months I pumped and put it in the beginning stages of the sippy cups never did bottles with mines and they are ok they are now 13 years and almost 12 years
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Pump and bottle feed
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I would tell my kids NO and say OW that hurts that’s not nice then lay him down for a few minutes even if he cries then try to let him latch again it may take hours of repeating the process but I’m telling you it worked for my kids. It’s consistency that does it.
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If he is hurting you I wouldn’t give him any chance to do it. I would stop the breastfeeding now and switch him to formula.
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I would absolutely tell the child “you’re hurting mommy, if you hurt mommy you won’t have your milk” they’re more clever than one thinks and understand so much more than we give them credit for.
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When my daughter started biting I’d go “ow! That hurt mommy, no bite” make very animated expressions. Then put him down and try again in a few minutes. It takes time but it works. But don’t feel bad about switching to a bottle, formula or pumping are great options.
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Don’t breast feed him. Pump and he can have it in a bottle. He is old enough to start teaching actions have consequences.
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Just start him on regular milk. He should be old enough. Ask your pediatrician
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If you don’t want to bottle feed him regular milk, you could pump & feed him by bottle.
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Why do you just pump
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F that. Switch to formula or pump and give a bottle
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Time to switch to pumping & bottles
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How are you going to positively breastfeed and not get mental health issues ? YOU come first, if YOU are done, then YOUR done!!
Do not feel ashamed of how you feel either, I know our family can be so pressuring but it’s not them who cry or dread the nursing! It’s not them covered in bruises …
You need to look after you to be the best you for the little version of you
I have no other advice but take it easy on yourself, love yourself and put yourself first sometimes 
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You can’t pour from an empty cup mama! You’ve got to put yourself first sometimes. It’s okay to stop bf. You could try to pump and then feed from a bottle if you’re looking to keep up the benefits of bm. You are not punishing your child, you’re keeping your mental and physical health good, and that’s okay.
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There is absolutely nothing wrong with formula feeding for ANY reason. This is a good reason.
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I would stop breastfeeding immediately. You sound miserable.
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He’s gotten 10 months of your breast milk. He’s perfectly fine to start weaning. You can pump if you want but there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula. I know everyone around will have their opinions and say you should continue breastfeeding but a happy mom=happy healthy baby.
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Cut him off hehehehehe
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I think you’re touched out. none of the things you listed are actually violent, they are all normal for breastfed babies. You might have to pump and bottle feed instead. I know it can be extremely annoying to be touched when you’re feeling touched out.
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Bottle time. There’s no shame in bottle feeding
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Pump and use a bottle or switch to formula. There’s ZERO shame in stopping and don’t let ANYONE make you feel like you’ve failed. Don’t you even think that!!! Your son needs a mentally healthy mom and this is having a detrimental effect on you. It will only get worse if the pattern continues. That’s not good for you, your spouse or your baby. You’ve fed him 10 months. You absolutely can stop for your sake. It’s not selfish!!! Self righteous women shaming other women for not living up to their standards infuriates me. 
It’s your life. It’s your family. Choose what’s best for you and yours. No one else or their opinion matters.
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Give him something to distract him while nursing. A nursing necklace would work great!
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My son was the same way. I felt the same way. He calm down after a while but I felt so violated by him sometimes.
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You’ve made it 10 months. If you’re truly done and it’s terrible for you then don’t do it anymore. Yes, breastmilk is amazing but so is a happy and healthy mom
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When my daughter started biting I quit. I still pumped and gave her breast milk but I stopped the breastfeeding. Don’t listen to outside pressures as they do not have to go through what you’re going through
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I had to start pumping and give my daughter bottles for this exact reason. She is extremely mobile while nursing and mean mean mean.
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Have you tried pumping and just giving him a bottle of your breast milk that way?
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He would get a bottle
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Pumping and bottles only. Mom’s should not have to go through ever. Show him who’s boss.
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My son when born refused to breast feed, no way would he take to the breast.
Bottle fed, he’s 6foot 6inches now, and healthy.
I fed my daughter for 3 months then bottle, she’s a healthy 5 foot 11.
Don’t be shamed.
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You could always pump and feed him with a bottle
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10 mths in an awesome start. My child went from breast to sippy cup at this age
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If he is demanding then stop the feed and give him a bottle. If he is calm then let him nurse. He will learn. I’m sorry mama.
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