My partner and I are arguing about disciplining our two years old. He’s a mischievous little boy who is into everything and climbing everywhere. I’m mainly the sole parent as OH works away all week, but DS hit the tv, and I was telling his dad that, and his dad says we need to start spanking him. I would never physically punish my child; I think there are other things we could try before even considering that I won’t even entertain the idea, now OH is saying, “well, when you’re in court because DS has hurt himself because he wouldn’t listen you’ll be saying different” Has anyone else argued about discipline? Am I wrong to make my house a no hitting zone? I just think if my two years old sees his parents hitting, he’s going to think it’s okay… And I don’t want a violent house. Am I wrong?
Timeout chair, no electronics, no TV, and no favorite snacks. No need for spanking.
I do a three discipline rule. The first time I redirect them tell them no that’s bad. The second time I pop their hand and say no that’s bad no no. That gets their attention. The third one I pop their bottom not hard just enough to get their attention kinda thing. And then I put them in time out. Tell them no no that’s bad and why it’s a no no everytime.
Sternly tell him no and put him in timeout, might have to keep putting him in timeout until he listens and stays the full two minutes. I do spank the kids in my home but only when they don’t listen the 3rd time I say something.
I was raised with getting my ass spanked, I’ve got an almost 2 yr who is the same, into everything, climbing, throwing things he gets ass spanked after being asked several times to stop, or no, or leave that alone.
What have you tried? How consistent are you? Consistency is key. A little pop on the butt isn’t going to hurt him. However, if you don’t like your hubby’s suggestion, then you’re going to have to figure it out being the sole disciplinarian. Consistency, being stern and firm and tough love is all it takes sometimes.
He’s two. Words do way more at this age. You have to use your words and explain WHY it’s a no etc. After two No’s we try to move her attention to something else. After three strikes we two hand but so lightly it’s insane lol. She whines and runs away and all is over. This argument also sounds childish. Cps won’t take a kid over spankings so that was silly. And arguing solves nothing. Y’all need a compromise
I’m not against spanking. But when we started spanking my 2 yo daughter it caused her to start hitting us when she was mad. So we have been doing time outs instead and it has worked well, but now we’re still having issues with her hitting. We learned she is just still too young to understand that getting spanked doesn’t give her permission to hit or “spank” when she’s mad. So we put a pause on spanking for now.
Y’all need to compromise and find what works for your child. Sometimes, time outs don’t work and spanking would work. Sometimes, spanking won’t work but time outs will. Y’all need to figure out what will work and stick to that
Also, make rules and y’all both have to stick to them. My husband is very firm about no hitting the kids in the face, which I’m cool with. I’m very firm in not hitting our kids with a belt or a switch or any of that and he thinks it’s ridiculous but he has to agree with my rules too. Also, I have a rule that we don’t hit them on the butt more than 3 times. 2 for not listening and 3 for big offenses. He also thinks that ridiculous, but he has to respect my rules too.
Just remember to all the spankers out there commenting… monkey see monkey do… we should be trying our best to teach our children physical violence is never okay or warranted.
He is 2… In my opinion a little young to spank…
To me that is reserved for extreme behavior…for instance my son rode his bike down winding hill, no hands, put he himself in danger, he got a snack on the butt, bike taken away…
He was older than yours…in total he was spanked 3 times…and by that I don’t mean a beating…I mean a snack on butt
Try watching abit of super nanny and maybe introduce the naughty step, it take patience doing the naughty step as long as you know what your doing
Whatever you decide, you and your spouse should agree. This was a huge issue for my husband and I, for a few years. We were not on the same page at all and it resulted in hurt feelings and grudges between us and bad behavior in our children. So please listen to each other and come to an agreement. Consistency seems to work best with any form of discipline.
As a mother of 5, different forms of punishment sometimes work differently on different children. You mentioned hitting…thats completely different from spanking. Some kids react well to being spanked and its a big eye opener to them and it straightens them up. Plus for a 2 year old it wouldn’t take much of a whack on the butt for him to be like whoa! Others you can take away their favorite toys. Personally I’d talk to your husband and just be open to try different methods until you see which works best with your child.
If your not consistent in telling no and follow through with time out every time nothing will work. If you have to say no and time out every 2 min for 3 hours than do it. It will make a change. I have 4 grown children. I just made it a game I my head, I can do this all day long and win against a toddler lol. I can give you references of my system from parents whom I daycared their children, lol
You are not wrong. It’s not okay to hit children. Make your husband read all the studies done by professionals that talk about how harmful spanking can be. You need to set rules, use positive reinforcement, COMMUNICATE and explain things to your kid, timeouts/loss of privileges when needed. Have lots of patience and remember he is still really young. Consistency is key.
Its BOTH your house not just yours same with son. You need compromise that’s his child and he has 50 50 input.
I think alot of kids are the way they are nowadays because they didn’t get a good spanking in their lives…
Everybody is so against any kinda discipline that’s why the world f*ing sucks! Everybody is too afraid to put their damn foot down and too scared to hurt someone’s feelings!
I completely agree with the no spanking. My two year old was having a hitting problem and obviously we were trying to teach her no its not okay. So spanking would just teach her violence is okay. I do two warnings then naughty chair there after. I was advised if naughty chair didn’t work after three attempts then put them in there room and explain why, but stay sitting at the door. Also 1 minute time out for each year. So my 2 year old get 2 minute time out and my 7 year old gets 7 minutes. Just make sure to explain to them why they are in time out. Once they are out of time out remind them that you love them and give them a cuddle
Spanking a child doesn’t make a house “violent” first of all. Spanking and beating are two completely different things.
If you aren’t okay with spanking then stick to your guns and don’t do it. I refuse to spank my daughter either. If you’re trying to compromise, maybe pull up the studies from the long term effects of spanking, make sure those come from a reputable source, and show it to your spouse. Just stick to how you want to raise your child and do your research on everything. Don’t let other moms shame you or anything over not hitting your kid.
And all those complain about spanking parents yeah monkey see monkey do my parents didn’t end up too neither did I neither did my kids nor my grandkids yeah monkey see monkey do teach them well know they will be disciplined and they will learn from it a little pat on the hand don’t do that or cuddle them and it will get worse but at two years old I think a time out will do
Too little to spank you can discipline him in other way just like facing the wall.
Hitting a child is never the answer. Especially a 2 year old baby who will have no idea why someone he loves and trusts will hurt him.
I grew up being spanked and I feel like if it’s absolutely necessary in serious situations I will give my child a tap on the ass, that being said, not at age 2! I think that’s a little young and there are other forms of discipline you can partake in. Coparenting is not easy and I think it’s very normal to argue about this. As your child’s mother you aren’t wrong in advocating for him and saying no spankings. His comment about the court is absolutely ridiculous, that would infuriate me. If you aren’t married you have 100% of the rights and him making comments like that would likely make any judge choose you’re side (if it came down to that). All in all, it’s best if you come up with a plan and stick to it he’s just a little guy yet and he’ll learn.
I agree with you. And what does he mean when you’re in court lmao that’s the dumbest thing to be afraid of.
Raise your children in love and teach them. Yeah it requires patience and we make mistakes but I’m with you on the no spanking perspective. There are a million ways to teach them without inflicting physical pain.
I have 4 kiddos. Two of them are almost grown, 18yrs and 16yrs. I did make the mistake of spanking my oldest when he was very little. I stopped very early in his years when I realized there are better ways to teach. I did get a ton of judgement as a first time mom for not spanking him anymore. Like people thought I didn’t know what I was doing, but I followed my heart and my son is now a perfect young man. My daughter (16yr old) is also amazing. I am so incredibly proud of how they turned out.
They are exceptional people, kind, strong and excel academically. Never given me a day of trouble. My younger two, 4 and 5yrs old are on the same path. So don’t let anyone tell you to spank them if it is not in your heart to do. You’ll regret not doing what you know is best.
I agree with you that there are other ways to discipline children rather than spankings. Id exercise some of them infront of your spouse. Once he sees a change in the behavior without enforcing it his way, he’ll see there are many forms of discipline.
Some people were just brought up in the spanking trend and think other methods are taking it to lightly.
He’ll learn. The same way your child will.
And 2 years old in my opinion is too young for alot of “punishments”
So I’d redirect or encourage better behavior by a reward system. Until the child could better understand rule breaking.
I would just tell him, we don’t want him hitting others so why would we hate him? That’s just showing him it’s okay to hit others if his parents are hitting him you aren’t setting a very good example by hitting your child. They’re learning and you don’t want them to be scared to make mistakes other wise they’ll be hit. It is both of your child’s but there’s other ways to teach your child right from wrong and hitting isn’t one of them
Never hit my kids. I was never hit. There are other ways.
He’s TWO. Spanking is out of the question. I try to go by this when it comes to discipline: What’s the Best Way to Discipline My Child? - HealthyChildren.org
Follow thu is tbe key to any discipline, if you say it do it and dont give any punishment you wont keep. 2 minutes in time out is better then 5 and not sticking to it . If you say I am going to take your toy / lunch / movie away if you ______ one more time , then if one more time happens get up and do it right then and stick to it . If you choose to spank do it out of discipline not anger and then dint baby them after .
I have 5 children. I don’t agree on spanking or hitting a child in any shape or form. We as parents are their protectors and help guide them. There are other ways of doing it.
I was spanked as a child and it did not affect me in anyway. There way to do it to get the child attention without any physical abuse. A smack on the bottom will get there attention and will not harm them. That’s why children are like they are because we think spanking is abuse. Look at our children growing up know days than when I was growing up. Kids these days are disrespectful and don’t care to be. Just my opinion. All rude comments keep to yourself.
Wether you believe in smacking children or not believe me smacking will have no effect on a mischievous 2 year old, it would stop him in the moment but not deter him from doing it again! I have never personally hit my children, I was smacked myself as a child and bare no ill effects from it 
but never felt that Ive ever wanted or needed to use that kind if discipline on my children. I did however have a nightmare of a 2 year old (and have been at my wits end) who is now a very well behaved respectful 9 year old, I’d say firm no’s, physically removing them from the situation when needed and pick your battles 
Positive reinforcement when hes good, and just ride it out im afraid hes intrigued and pushing boundaries smacking him will make no amount of difference. I truly beleive if I had used that kind of discipline he wouldn’t be the loving child he is now. And honestly I would give anything for my mischievous toddler back … just for a day or 2 
He is 2. He is supposed to be mischievous and getting into things. Thats how kids figure stuff out. It isn’t as though he is 6 or 7 and has a better idea. He is just figuring it out. Spanking a 2 year old for getting into everything to me is wrong.
why assault him, it only teaches him that hitting and hurting people is the way to handle the situation 
you are right in not wanting to hit /or physically hurt him but also the emotional damage that spanking causes is really not needed x stick by your no smacking rule you and your boy will be all the better for it 
He is 2. Redirect him. Just to let you know that’s what a 2 year old does.
How about you child proof your home? We had to buy a wall mount, for our TV, a shelf for underneath. We don’t have anything our can can climb on. Hes being a kid and learning. Kids will get into everything. If you don’t want something destroyed put it up.
Maybe try a timeout chair or put in the corner or on a mat for say 2 minutes. If that doesn’t work as much as it kills us inside, a smack on the bum isn’t going to hurt. It’s going to teach him that what he is doing is wrong. For discipline it needs to be both parents involved and work together to figure out what the best form is. It’s hard as hell but once you get a “plan” set for it it will get easier.
I will never spank my children. Maybe a super light pop but other than that it’s not happening.
It’s all in HOW you do it. I would start with timeout, or taking things away from him…being sent to the corner and stay there 2 minutes.
Then if it continues you move onto spanking. My child was verY Head strong and tested us. She had to have “consequences” to her bad choices. Even at that age. She is the best 7 year old I know now. We always talked after a punishment about respecting me and making “wise” decisions. To a certain extinct you and your spouse are both right.
What does OH and DS mean
I met and 80 year old woman with seven kids. She told me out of seven kids she one child wouldn’t listen unless she spanked him. She said she didn’t ever need to spank any other of her children except the one child and that all children are different and need different kinds of discipline. If you have tried all other avenues and your not willing to medicate them to settle. Then maybe she’s right. After all seven kids is a lot to only ever have to spank one child. She also said that it was in extreme cases in which he just wouldn’t listen and put himself in danger. He was also the youngest and nothing ever fazed him and there was no tech. .
I believe spanking is the last resort choice. Get to know your child you can tell what motivates him. You did say he hit the TV I would ask him if would to be hit like that?
We tried light taps on the diaper and they absolutely did not work. Time outs did the trick. We had to sit with ours for the first few times and put them back when they got up, standing there with them and having the timer on 1 min for each year in age. Still works to this day and ours is now almost 5. All kids are different though. Just have to find what works for your child. Good luck
Time out and take what he loves to do away
Hitting a child is never the answer. Especially a 2 year old baby who will have no idea why someone he loves and trusts will hurt him.
Spanking is not hitting if you’re doing it correctly! The point is to discipline them, not to hurt them! If you go easy on kids they won’t learn how to handle life and we have another generation of entitled socially inept kids that won’t grow up
Hubby and I have 3 kiddos. They are now 12, 14 and 15 years old. We decided to only spank when needed such as hitting, breaking things, throwing things, etc. We also had time outs when spanking was to harsh of a consequence for the wrong choice the child made. The children did not need spanked often. I hope this helps you decided what consequences to chose. Oh, one last thing. In our home we use the word consequence instead of punishment. That was so as they got older they would connect the word consequence to the real world. The was one best decision we made.
Slap the bum once doesnt have to be hard
Usually before they hurt themselves
If they dont listen pain is the best teacher 
A small bump wont kipp them but i bet they will think twice about it 
2 is absolutely too young. They have no connection or understanding to it. Jeezus
Sometimes a couple swats on the bum makes their ears work better. Moderate is key tho. I’ve seen people that don’t have consistent discipline with their children and they are a danger to other children and themselves.
Your tapping the kid. Enough for shock value. Shock him good the first time he’ll think twice about it next time lol
Okay so, my mother never hit us, unless we were about to get hurt (pop on the hand maybe) we turned out to be just fine. None of us have gone to jail, I graduated with honors, my sister is graduating with honors. So Don’t think that will be the case. On the other hand, my husband’s family hit them young like that, and almost every single one of his brothers has discipline issues, been to jail, done something illegal, etc. If it works for you and your child then that’s what matters. In my opinion, I wouldn’t want to be hit, so why would I hit my child? Hitting them doesn’t teach them why it’s wrong, it just shows them they’ll get hurt by doing it. I’ve talked to our kids and explained why it’s wrong, why they’re in trouble and make sure they understand and we’ve never had any issues. Don’t let anyone pressure you into hitting your child if that’s not what you want.
Spanking is not to inflict pain so much as to catch the childs attention and let them know youre serious. Its a double edged sword. I am of the personal belief though that if I dont teach my kids now that there are unwanted consequences to acting out, then the world will later. And I think them learning that now will help them deal with it better in the grown up real world. Because it will happen. There are always consequences. And at 2, thats a good age to start. My 2 year old understands when her butt gets popped why I did it. And my 7 and 4 year old did too. And the both of them are the sweetest girls. They still get in trouble, but its more serious now and I treat them more mature because they respond to it better since they understand words and meanings in sentences.
Better check your country’s laws regarding discipline. I would recommend you both doing the Incredible Years Parenting Course, Google your closest provider.
I grew up in that era. I was spanked and wasn’t abused. 
Spare the rod, you spoil the child.
I dont spank per say but if my child is about to nose dive off the couch ill be piping her leg shes only 18 months and knows my 3.5 half year old has learned the same way to the point no one time usally does the trick. I’ve never really had to spank him though as he listens the first time my daughter is a whole mood with how she acts and if I didn’t pop her shed get seriously hurt shes a dare devil
Your reasons are valid. And everyone will try to change your mind. It’s very common to not see eyes to eye with so or spouses about discipline. Kids are easily distracted. Pull him away and tell him the tv will be gone if he hits it. Or he can get hurt by hitting it.
Was he doing it on purpose?
At 2 and hitting the tv I don’t think warrants a spanking. lol …have to do better! Use stern voice,explain why it’s wrong,put the tv higher so he can’t reach it. Dad needs to catch him and tell him and he will probably listen to dad.
All kids generally low that “AH!” Word lol. Usually deters them.
A spanking isn’t abuse and isn’t violent either. A little pop on the butt isn’t going to harm him but I bet he’ll get the idea of what’s allowed and what’s not.
To those saying 2 is too young, I beg to differ.
I have my own children and also babysat my nephews. A little swat makes them think twice… even at 2 years old.
Hell, I have a 14 month old right now who gets tiny pops on the hand when she deliberately keeps getting into what I’ve diverted her from. It doesn’t harm her; she just doesn’t like it. Afterwards, a little “aht-aht!” Reminds her that I don’t like said behavior/habit and she gets away from whatever it is I don’t want her to do. So no, 2 years old isn’t too young that they won’t understand.
I started spanking my 9yo when she started walking. Most things I will try with redirecting her first. Then time out. But for something like this, I for sure would’ve swat her on the bottom. Your partner is right. If you don’t start teaching them young, and getting your point across the first time, you’re gonna end up with an unruly teen that ends up in court, or juvie, and maybe even jail once they end up an adult. Redirection and time out work for small things. Your kid hitting the tv? Oh heck no! What are you gonna do when he breaks it? That’s quite a bit of money just thrown down the drain. My daughter know better than to act like that. I put the fear of god in her. Thank goodness I’ve only had to whip her like 5x’s in her 9 years of life, but each time I have gotten my point across that she better not do whatever she did again. And I know that the few times that I have had to spank her, have influenced her decisions when she decides to act inappropriately Bc she knows the line between acceptable and not acceptable that I have taught her. Ultimately it’s your choice in how you parent. And it’s your partner’s choice in how they parent. Just don’t be surprised when your kid acts a fool around you and eventually destroys all your stuff, and gets in a whole bunch of trouble Bc they know you’re the softy that ain’t gonna do squat and they don’t respect you. 
Idk I was spanked as a kid and I grew up fine. That being said, no I don’t condone hitting at all. There’s no reason to be placing your hands on your child to enforce discipline. Take away his luxuries. Set up a safe time out zone. (Calm down zone). 2 is a tough age also because They are pushing boundaries and constantly trying to hurt themselves 
Typically, a 2-year old child:
is less frustrated than a child between 18-23 months
is more willing to do what he can and doesn’t try too hard to do things beyond his ability
is more coordinated; less likely to fall
is less pre-occupied with keeping his balance; runs, climbs more easily
has better language skills, is less frustrated because he can make himself more easily understood
can wait a few minutes for want he wants
can stand slight or temporary frustration
is beginning to like the idea of pleasing others
still cannot share, but can give another child a substitute toy
is loving and affectionate
At two, I think they know what they are doing but I don’t think they have much impulse control. Remember to act age appropriately. I don’t believe in spanking. I don’t really believe in disciplining my 2 year old either. Maybe when he’s closer to 3 I’ll reassess this situation. It depends on each child IMO
If that’s the worse thing he does at 2 you’re in luck…
If he’s old enough to understand logic and reason use it rather than hitting them. If he’s not old enough then he’s not old enough to be hit. We’re a bit free zone here too. The most we do is a snack in the hand if needed. I don’t think spanking is ever right. If you mess up at work and your boss spanked you, how would you feel? It’s no different for children. They’re people and they’re doing the best they can
If youre against spanking then you need to come up with an alternative punishment…
Time out chair? Time to lay down for a few min? Tv gets turned off?
Dont let your kid goes crazy doing whatever he wants when he wants to get attention and act a brat. If you have tried other things and he just dont care I dont think a spank on the butt is gona kill him. Some people let their kids run the show and before you know it you will have a 5 year old smacking you and breaking things being a terror cause he knows there no consequences or discipline. Just set the boundaries and stick to them
I feel like doing that to a 2 year old is a bit harsh, I mean their called terrible twos for a reason! Be firm and discipline him but a “spanking” or a tap on the butt should be your last resort. If you and the hubby don’t get on the same page now it’s only gonna get worse as the child gets older.
You won’t be beating him. Just spank his hiney
you’re not wrong. spanking is proven to be psychologically harmful and all the people who still support it are blatantly putting their fingers in their ears and going “LALALALA” because it’s an uncomfortable thing for them to come to terms with, for many reasons. stick to your guns, your instinct not to hit the child you’re supposed to protect and care for is correct.
Don’t listen to all the child abusers in the comments telling you that hitting your CHILD is going to help. All 2 year olds are going to be 2 year olds, they do NOT need to be hit, plus there’s an overwhelming amount of evidence showing that not only are they not receptive to it, but it damages them psychologically.
Trust me a slap on the hand butt or leg at this age and you will have a well behaved child that will know right from wrong and you will not have to spank when he is older
There is a difference between spanking as in abuse and discipline. Firm believer in that. And also,parent how you see fit. When my kids were young,simply being with them and guiding them,asking them not to and explaining why would help a lot. Always getting up and saying that’s dangerous that’s an owie you can get hurt or killed. Even when they were that age I did that,and walked them away. Distracted with toys and talking,if they had fits let them. It helped a lot and well when I couldn’t be there i knew they could get into something. I do time out,I spank,enforce consequences and give extra chores. He is 2,if he watches tv,say oopsie you broke it. And well,move on. I have 2 boys and 1 girl biologically, and now we adopted 2 girls and a boy it’s never ending and oh boy I can’t wait to be a visitor in their house! Lol!
Your hubby may see nothing wrong with being a spanker,just chat about it and get a game plan for the future. And let me say,you have to be on the same page! <3
A pop on the hands r butt is certainly not wrong and not abuse. But u have to explain “why” u did it
Time out chair! It’s called terrible two’s for a reason! I love that age…
Just gonna leave this here. I’m a little alarmed that people think it’s ok to hit their kids but demanding they respect you as well. Considering we as adults won’t and don’t respect other adults who physically hit us, what makes you think kids will?
Spanking is not the answer and it’s not effective. It will teach him to hit when he’s angry which you’re trying to get him not to do. Redirect at that age and also set consequences like if he hits the TV he doesn’t get to watch cartoons.
I dont think spanking is okay. However, i also dont think rasing an entitled annoying unruly brat is okay either lol. Positive reinforcement on their level and redirection usually will work.
ETA: My comment isnt just directed at a 2 year old. Its infact not directed at any toddler age group. Its meant for ALL ages. Toddlers are ass holes anyway.
I’m not gonna go into detail or debate this and I know it has been done for decades, but at no point is it okay to hit/put your hands on another human being. It isn’t normal. There are other ways to redirect and ways to make them understand.
“It’s not abuse” “They need discipline” okay but WHO was the first person to look at their young child and ever think, “okay, if I hit them, they’ll know to stop”. because that’s logical and okay, right?? Wrong.
Could never be me.
I agree that spanking is a horrible and abusive way to discipline! I have never spanked my kids! One is now 21 years old and my other is 8 years old and I have never and will never spank, and they both have turned out to be some of the most caring, considerate, intelligent and wonderful human beings and they both know right from wrong, everyone that knows them says they are are some of the best kids they have ever met and they compliment me on my parenting, and by the way I am a single mom❤️
Bc the timeout generation is skiing so well. I was spanked and I learned what I could and couldn’t do. I learned to have a healthy fear of consequences and learned respect and follow the rules.
You better find a way now because he is about to be running all over you and it’ll be too late.
Becky Bocanegra Cerda
Girl you keep doin you while these ladies have heathens for children
And when your child grows up to be a spoiled little brat you’ll regret not spanking him, I was raised getting my ass tore up if I did something wrong, and I’m a respectful young man because the way my moma raised me
Honestly, this is something people need to discuss and agree about BEFORE having kids together. We did do the hand spank and the threat of a butt spank but knowing it was a possibility cured the kids of acting in ways that they actually needed it. So many kids these days know they’re untouchable and that has created a whole new beast.
My 19m old is wild and all over the place very active climbs runs full speed gets into everything and when attitude and severe frustration sets in we sit down on the couch for a few minutes or until he can settle down even if I have to put my arm across his legs to keep him there. The whole time I keep reminding him that’s it’s okay to get frustrated but we can’t be mean to others (or the dogs) or when he can’t listen to what Mama or Daddy asks him he has to sit.( only if been asked multiple times) like get down from the coffee table or whatever he isn’t supposed to be climbing. I also do this when he’s just down right whinnying over absolutely nothing and I’ve tried everything in the book and it don’t work, I’ll drop to the ground and throw a tantrum with him he stops pretty quickly. Lol
A two year old child is a baby. Everyone talking about how you better handle it now clearly have children that are out of control at an age where they understand punishment. It’s honestly sickening to see how many moms advocate hurting a baby. There are plenty of other ways to redirect behavior.
Gentle parenting is way harder than spanking. That means you have control over your emotions and will be able to teach your child how to control theirs.
My husband and I have different views, but he still doesn’t spank because of the studies I have presented to him.
The whole brained child & no drama discipline helped with techniques to use.
I dont think it works to teach kids to be good by HITTING them, personally. It will just teach them to hit people that aren’t behaving how they want them to. in my opinion.
There is a difference between spanking and abuse. I got a spankings when I was little for doing wrong and I am perfectly fine! Never gotten into trouble in my life have great job and all that. I now have 2 year old boy and guess what he gets a spanking when he is doing wrong not betting him but a little spank and if I see him acting up I’ll ask him. Do you want a spanking? He then says no. So then I tell him to stop or you’ll get a spanking and guess what!! He stops! He is a perfectly healthy, beautiful, smart and happy boy!
Two year old is pretty young for spanking, I’d say start with time outs, no talking on time out. He’s still learning what’s right, wrong and okay. Unless there’s consequences he won’t really get it. And they have to be consistent.
We don’t hit in our house hold. We are a talk it out family. There are consequences to each action, good or bad.
Each consequence has an action back, being “naughty” get you a punishment ( older child is cleaning, a moment to himself, and those great conversations that kids hate ) my younger child gets a time out and we always end our punishment with what they did wrong, why they shouldn’t do that, how to talk out our frustrations and how we can solve the issue without negative behavior.
I also end my punishments with love and understanding
Different things work for different children. I did spank my children. They all turn out to be great people and parents. I belive know matter what he needs to know right from wrong starting now! I say if time out works sick with it,if not try something else. Just make sure he is learning right from wrong so you don’t have a big problem later on in life
There’s a difference between violence and spanking as a form of positive punishment. You should never be going 10/10 maybe 2/10 in the form of strength. Enough to correct their behavior until all you have to say is do you want a spanking and they will know they’ve crossed a line.
I don’t think hitting a child should be allowed. You can’t hit an adult why can you hit a child?
No you aren’t wrong, you would be interested in Big Little Feelings , they have great resources on how to deal with unwanted behaviours and support your child’s emotions in a healthy way.
I got spanked as a kid. I can’t really say it worked too well over Other consequences, it usually made me turn against my parents. Violence was normal for me growing up. I also know kids who hit back so having a tit for tat, petty argument or competition with your kid never works. You need to pull the plug when you notice you’re both reacting to eachother in a similar way. Conditioning a child to hit and be hit over bad behaviour can be dangerous in teen/adult life as it becomes a normal consequence/reaction. Try one warning technique, sitting down and making them stay and asking why they did that. Taking the source of entertainment that was used wrong away, explaining why it went, when they will get it back, and doing something else WITH them to end the ‘being in trouble’ phase/mood.
Spanking is a disciplinary tool that only works if you ensure you don’t do it anger, and do it immediately after the child does something that is serious enough (like attempting to run into traffic, or something that could cause serious injury or death). Also, spanking doesn’t work for every kid. If you feel uncomfortable with physical discipline (spanking, “popping” or slapping the hand) then that’s your prerogative. The important thing is to correct destructive behavior by encouraging positive behavior.
If you spank your child, make sure you’re doing it for a proper reason, and not out of anger or frustration. Don’t use excessive force, and explain clearly and simply to the child why they were disciplined, then comfort them and remind them that you love them no matter what, and then move to encourage better behavior.
- don’t accuse parents that do use physical discipline of abuse, unless that’s what they’re actually doing. With some kids, verbal discipline or removal of privileges doesn’t work. As long as the discipline is for a valid reason, isn’t excessive, and isn’t the only resort they turn to, then its simply called parenting.