My spouse won't stop having loud parties: What should I do?

I would talk to your landlord about taking him off your lease because he’s regularly disturbing the peace.

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Go talk to your landlord explain the situation and that it’s only him violating your rental agreement that way he’s the one who gets sited and would be kicked out… Also find out how much longer the lease is and get out early if u can if not get him kicked out and find a room mate

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1 am and he still has friends over wtf no, if you are on the lease as well that is your house too he can’t just say it’s his house when it’s the both of yours place… he sounds like right piece of work, you should be calling the cops complaining yourself even though he’s your spouse he’s not making your place comfortable for you to be around and as long as you live there you have a say and he can’t do a thing about it. If you don’t want them there call the cops because you have children sleeping and that place is a danger place with alcohol around

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Move out and get your name off the lease. This will also depend on where you are living so definitely talk to your land lord and see what you can do. But definitely leave that man child!!

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I know someone who was in a similar situation and the landlords evicted her bf and she and her kids got to stay. But also does he really want an eviction on his record ? Maybe sit and tell him what may happen if he doesn’t leave on his own.

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This was my life for too many years, with the added bonus of being hit or threatened regularly. Do not depend upon him leaving; he likely is gsslighting you. The cops can do nothing - they cannot remove him, nor any of his “invited” guests, as long as your home is his legal address. The day that they told me he could invite anyone to live in MY home, even over my wishes, and even when he paid nothing toward expenses, I knew that THAT had to change. Fortuitously, the next time he hit me, he gave me a black eye. That black eye gave me the leverage I needed to change his legal address from mine. Last I knew, I saw him on TV, on a story about the homeless problem.

You need to get out of that situation. Sadly, your kids can be taken from you, if someone decides to report the situation to authorities. Call your local women’s shelter to see what options you have.

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Whatever you do put your part of rent in escrow

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My spouse won't stop having loud parties: What should I do? - Mamas Uncut

Take your kids and leave.

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Move out, get away from him. Leave now.

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If you can’t leave. I would call the non emergency number after ten and report it myself! They will come out. Also, do speak to your landlord, but have your police report from noise complaint available too! The landlord may just hear you out on that, if you go about it the right way. Good luck Mama! :heart::heart:

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See if he will vacate the lease. Also yes talk to your landlord because after so many cop calls you both can be evicted or this will follow you to other rentals. Also there are places that will help pay damage deposit and other dues. Try looking into those. He may never leave so you need to think of you and your kids.

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Ring the police complaining anonymously about noise. If you ring repeatedly everyday they will have no choice but to come out to speak to your partner.
Maybe stay at a family/friends house for a while until you can get on your feet again for you and your children x

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Ring the landlord, all landlords are different mine helped me and got my ex off the tenancy xxx

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When is your lease up? I would move on, obviously the situation will not improve. Better to move on your own terms, then to be evicted. Get your name off that lease.

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Dreadful do hope you can get rid!

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Call the police. Talk to ur landlord. Get him out

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Have him formally evicted! Go to the landlord. You calling the law I don’t think will do anything, except make it worse. Look into legal options and quick! Go to landlord, if nothing, courts. Call legal aid or an attorney in your area and ask for help. Best to you.

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Do your parents live close? Where you could stay there with the kids until he either gets his :poop: together or moves out?

Get your kids out of that situation immediately… you definitely don’t want a bunch of strange drunks coming in and out of your home all through the night while you and your children are sleeping! The kids safety have to be top priority.

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If you can’t leave, ask your landlord if you can change your locks. Change them while he’s gone.

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You need to move out and start over
Can’t wait on him to leave

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Just Google your local non emergency police department number and file a noise complaint. You don’t even have to tell them who you are. Then I’d tell your landlord that the police keep coming for noise complaints… this will probably set you both up for eviction… but sometimes it’s easiest to do hard things when we are forced to deal with them. Or talk to your landlord and see if it’s possible to just evict your husband then take him for child support and if applicable, spousal support. It’s hard to deal with people like that.

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Talk to your landlord about evicting him. Explain the situation and tell them you need him to leave, and he won’t. Not fair to the kids to have to deal with that crap.

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You need to get off the lease and move out. Stay with family or in a hotel for now but you need to leave. He’s not even looking for a new place because why would he if it’s “his house”. You can call the police but after so many calls he will start to blame someone and the landlord will be notified. If you tell the landlord and he gets evicted, he know where you live and can come back to bother you anytime.

The police won’t do anything if he’s on the lease so they won’t make him leave or anything, most likely only would keep warning him about the noise level. But you should be able to go ahead to the labor board and have him evicted, your landlord would know more about that. And once he’s served a eviction notice and his time runs out then police will make him leave if he’s still there.

Keep putting in noise complaints every time it happens

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Turn the power off put your big girl undies on and tell his mates to fuck off home that your home is a family home for your children.

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Let me start out by saying I’m not judging you at all. But it only takes a matter of a few minutes for your kids to be compromised. For example, a party is going on, a fight or something breaks out, you and him are distracted… anything can happen… Raising children is hard enough already, you don’t need that extra constant worry added…

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It’s a Saturday night… why do adults have to be in bed at a certain time? However if you absolutely can’t live with it, leave I guess. You’re an adult too and can also decide how you want to live. I would have thought you’d have those sorts of discussions before you got 3 kids in with him tho.

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When you Lease comes up, remove your name.
Ask your Landlord if they have any properties for you to move into.
Call the Police.
Contact Womens Refuge

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Talk with a domestic violence advocate! He may not physically be hurting you but this is still a form of abuse they will give you resources on what you can do!

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You answered your question. Leave because apparently he wont

Be careful cause someone could contact DCS and you dont want that. Find a safe place for your children. They dont deserve that. He needs to respect you and your children. Praying for you.

You only live twice its time for the second one but only if you kick the first into touch i did 50 trs ago and never looked back m 45 yrs now but only you can solve your prob

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Either start stashing money or start finding programs willing to help you out with security deposit or ask your landlord about getting him off the lease and evicted.

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Set your boundaries with regard to yourself and children or make a decision Best wishes :pray:t2:

If I’m hearing you right he gets drunk n threaten you n the kid has even hit you a few times , might need to call cops the next time it happens and get a restraining order!

Break the lease and move out into a better environment. I’m sorry you’re going through that. Sounds like he’s a piece of trash that needs to grow up! You got this!!

Check into section 8 housing or maybe stay with a family member if possible. There are a lot of programs out there that help single mothers. Especially in situations like this

I would def get with the landlords. You have to do right by those babies before DCS is called or school starts and they are kept up all night

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I up and left my daughters father my abuser with my child to the state of AZ, got a restraining order which was approved. And continued on with my life, got a job, got a car got my license. He went to the courts of where we were living saying I fled with his child and she could be in danger because I’m using drugs.

Although I was an addict years ago I wasn’t raising our child and living with him everyday using drugs. I was a fantastic mother, day in and day out 24 hours a day mostly because I couldn’t go anywhere because we didn’t have a car, and I wasn’t allowed to have friends. I cooked and cleaned everyday after everyone. Not that I minded it because I was a mama had to make dinner and clean up anyway for my babygirl. But him being out of town most the time toward the end of our relationship and when I got him it was the drunken abuser. I finally made the decision to leave and better my child’s life. But in the end, he gets custody of my daughter because I got fucked out of my day in court. Now daily I have to deal with him getting drunk constantly cussing me out telling me he’s this great father saying I can come watch my daughter while he works, saying I can come get her and bring her here, then changing his mind the second he gets drunk. Regardless of him lying to the court I still have to talk to my daughter and make sure she’s okay daily so theirs really no way around not speaking to him. I guess all I can really say is if you do leave, you need to make sure shit is in order so you cannot get fucked in anyway with your kids. I made that mistake and have been regretting it ever since.

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Talk to the landlord and see if you can get your name or his name off the lease. Tell your land lord the situation. It really sounds like he doesn’t care about you or his kids. I was in a situation like yours with an abusive partner. My landlord let me off the lease.

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Maybe go to the women’s shelter they will help you

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Get a job while your kids are in school
Think about your kids

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Contact your lical womens shelter and get youtdelf and your children out of there.

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Talk to your landlord ASAP. He can evict just him. Also contact the police and ask them what your options are? Let them know you have children in the home and it’s him drinking and making the noise. It is emotional abuse towards you and child neglect by him towards the kids. Police come out enough and they will arrest him.

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you could go up to the courts and file to evict him yourself. You’ve already received complaints about the music and he’s still doing it. Keep documenting everything and they’ll have him leave when y’all go to court

I had a similar situation 2 a point. I told my husband not 2 put a guy who stayed with us 4 a bit on the lease, he did it anyway because that was the only way we could enforce rent. When we could no longer afford the place due 2 him not paying rent, we left since we were the primary on the lease. He didn’t agree so decided not 2 sign the papers making him primary on the lease or acknowledging that he was responsible if he wanted 2 stay. We unfortunately got tagged 4 every bit of shit he left there. My point here is there may not be anything u can do without costing u money and back firing on u. I’m not saying stay in the situation ur in but if u stay u may end up getting evicted anyway. Check in 2 local places that maybe able 2 help u. Can u stay with family?

Constantly documenting, go to your battered women’s shelter. Leave!

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so far all you are focusing on is what you cant do . you can do whatever you want to but you are not there yet. i left with 6 yr old no money went to shelter got help finding a place and put ad in paper to get jobs cleaning houses for other people until i could find some better work difference between me and you i wanted to leave you dont or you would. look at what you are teaching your kids and what you are contributing to your misery then change it if you want to

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Boot him out. A good idea is to speak to your landlord, tell him your situation. He could evict, just him, then serve him with no trespassing orders for the property after the eviction, and you and your children can stay in the home.

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Call the division of child and family services. They will take action!

Talk to the landlord and explain! And I think that they can evict him but he will still be liable for the half of the rent!

Save money and move into a hotel.

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Call the police you don’t have to give them your name they will shut his party down every time… bad thing to this is your landlord will know every time police come out and could hold it against you…

Honestly get urself evicted or taken off the lease and that won’t be ur problem… it will be his. I went through that and what ever he did to the place or what ever he wrecked is on you too. So take ur self off. And I would leave with only me and my kids with out saying anything. I would pack up, and not say one word. When ever you get payed, or what ever money you have coming in… get a place for you and ur kids or better yet… go find help to leave and get them to get you into something you can afford.

From some one that was in a similar situation get out of it before your kids see you being hit , shouted at ,down graded and pushed to the floor. It’s not worth it. Been in you foot steps but only with one child. Don’t put your kid through any more. You will manage .Get hold of a local shelter.

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He is not going to change. Just leave!

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Talk talk talk to landlords! Minus kids I been thru this! If you need to call the police. Something I wouldn’t do but wish I had now!

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First off, call the landlord. Explain that what’s going on in your home is of no fault of you or your children. Ask if there’s another vacancy you could move to with your kids. Explain the toxic living situation in the home as it is now. Some landlords will let a woman out of a lease for such situations. It’s so unhealthy and dangerous for your children to be in that environment. His behavior could end up getting you and your kids evicted and with that on your credit it would be hard to find another rental. Call your local police station and see what your options are. Tell them everything. I wish you luck.

Does your landlord have other properties suitable for you?I couldn’t live like that and would take my kids to a homeless shelter,you will get help there for a fresh start

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I am so sorry that you’re going through this. I know exactly how you feel because I am living a very similar nightmare and feel trapped in the situation. Unfortunately the truth is not a very happy truth and we must survive.

I would consult an attorney first, because WHEN you do talk to your landlord about the possibility of removing him from the lease, your INSIGNIFICATE OTHER will seek vengence. Be ready for that. I’d say your landlord probably doesn’t care whose name is on the lease, as long as they are getting the rent paid. However, if damage is involved when he is evicted, then that’s a whole different story.

What kind of relationship do you have with your neighbors? Ask them to mention to him the noise after 10 rule and he needs to stop. Have them tell him if he doesn’t stop calls to the landlord will start. Then calls to the cops. Maybe coming from someone other than you will make him see the light. Then maybe he’ll leave and you can be at peace. Good luck.

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Of course you can call the cops…anyone can all the cops. If there is a noise ordinance in your town all that loud noise should be gone at a certain time anyway. Talk with the landlord about everything that’s going on and why you feel the need to be off the lease. If nothing else expressing the need for safety for you and your kids is a good reason. People in and out at all hours drinking or drunk anything can happen. I do believe no one wants to feel as if one is"boss" over the other and maybe when you say hes not living with your rules that’s a issue for him. Regardless…I’d figure out a way to move because you and him don’t matter near as much as the kids.

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You can call the cops even though you live there. I would also speak with your landlord about getting him off the lease and explain what’s going on. I’m sure he’ll definitely see your point of view, he may be willing to evict him

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Ask your landlord if you can have you or your bf vacate the lease. We did this at my apt complex i worked at. Make sure you talk to landlord about what is going on cause so many police calls can be a lease violation and result in eviction or non lease renewal. Also the complaints can follow you to other rentals. There are also places that help pay damage deposit and other dues, look into those. Leave as soon as you’re able.

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Yes even if you live there you can call the cops if it gets to be too much. Also speak with your landlord. Wishing you lots of luck

Better watch yourself because u wouldn’t want the children’s aid involved. In that situation someone may call Sorry your going through that

Time to get a new place to call home. Some adult children won’t grow up or change. Talk over with your landlord I’m sure he definitely see your point of view. After all neighbors complaining so it’s coming to eviction or not renewal of lease.

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Do what you think is best and if it was me call the police because they will put him out whether he’s on the lease or not a day will remove him from your home I know been there done that it’s coming from a woman that knows all about Alcoholics trust me and that sounds like what he is just call the police honey

If you got the place together and need both of your incomes to afford the place on paper then the landlord might not be able to take him off the lease and he would still have legal rights to your home. I would call the non-emergency number for your local police department and ask them what the best course of action is as far as calling the police out there. They may request you call the non emergency number instead of 911.

Talk to the landlord and try to get him off the lease. Talk to an attorney. I would have already addressed his friends and any other of his invited individuals and told them they are not welcome and that you do not want them there.

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Call your landlord and explain your situation he/she may be willing to give your SO a 30 day eviction notice if not ask to be taken of the lease and move out with the kids

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Call, call, call and call some more. Explain to landlord what’s going on and let your neighbors know you’d appreciate them calling. Landlord will see what’s going on and boot him (hopefully).

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Talk to the landlord and get him off the lease then you’ll be able to do what you need to.

Talk to your landlord. Would it be easier to get yourself off the lease and move elsewhere

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Talk to your landlord…

His behavior is abusive. To you and to your children. If you don’t get rid of him, you may lose your children. There is a non-emergency number to your local law enforcement office. Or find a shelter for women and children. I wish you all the best and you will be in my prayers. I understand your situation all too well.

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1st tell his friends to get the hell out your place and if he don’t like it they can follow suit. You and your kids are trying to sleep and its disrespectful, & if his behavior changing then there maybe something (drugs) or someone (man/woman) that’s changing that behavior. Read between the lines that he says

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Throw his ass out put his clothes outside

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Get a no contact order he has to leave

He’s a narcissist or he maybe Bipolar there’s a reason you left him and if he’s making you miserable leave

When kids must come first as much as it would suck there is shelters.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My spouse won't stop having loud parties: What should I do? - Mamas Uncut

Leave. Whatever it takes to start over. Stay with family. It won’t change. Plan on leaving ASAP.

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No he ok let him live

Talk to an attorney.

Talk to the landlord. Kick him out

Join this group

Call the police anonymous

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Privately talk to your landlord.

Get him out fast is you can

It honestly depends on this person’s state. In some states like SC, you have to get an OP to get him off the lease legally

So,I left with a newborn,and a toddler.11$ to my name.I made it,and have never laid eyes on th POS dad again.You have to have help,but youd be surprised how many people want to help.

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I’d start looking for a place for me and my kids, then I’d sit down with my landlord and ask if he would be willing to terminate the lease based on that behavior, then secure your new residence.
You may very well find the landlord is not going to want to deal with the cops called, potential drunks destroying the place, or the potential for domestic disputes.
If you don’t do that, I’d call the cops nightly at 10pm and ask them to come out, and every time the drunks show up. Eventually you SO will get the picture and move along….

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Also just call non emergency and calmly tell them you have a neighbor blasting music and you are trying to sleep and wish to be anonymous for fear of retaliation.

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yep!its time to move and end the relationship.for the sake of your children and for yourself. some men are just not growing up.

Pack him a backpack with a few essentials, leave it outside with a note telling him to leave, dry out for a few days and have a clear head to be able to hear and understand you, regroup and change or get the fuck out and change the locks or hide his keys, sounds like the hiding of keys might not be so hard.

You are strong enough to know this isn’t the world you want for you and the kids, be the change you want to see for your kids girl! You got this.

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