My spouse wouldn't let me join a dinner he had with his friend

My SO is going out to dinner at 8pm with a women he used to work with, he didn’t really ask me about going, just told me he was.I asked if I could go and take our toddler, and all responded with was “Well she’s vegan so it’s limited options and I plan on going late”.I just find it kind of rude and he also has a lot of photos of her on his cell phone, even before we met. He was her musical engineer because she’s a smaller actress in LA and said they have a close relationship because of that. But still, I can’t help but feel like I’m a secret or that he doesn’t want me to ever be included. Plus, an 8pm dinner sounds more like a date to me.

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Y’all need trust! If your man can’t be trusted to meet up with an old work colleague for food without you reaching for divorce papers I think he’s had a lucky escape if you do leave him

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My spouse wouldn't let me join a dinner he had with his friend

Definitely something to think about

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It probably is a date

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Yah I dont trust it. It sounds like a date

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I wouldn’t put up with it! Or say I got a babysitter so I an join see what he says

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Sounds fishy. No reason if they are just friends you couldn’t join

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I’m not going anywhere my spouse isn’t welcome and he’s the same. Definitely sounds a little fishy.

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I see him not wanting the kid to come though. Sometimes we need a parent break.

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I would be putting my toddler in the car and following them or sitting outside the restaurant :thinking:

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Mad sus he blowin out her back

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Go to where they goin… drop the kid in his lap. Say u have a family emergency… see him next morning… or night, thats ur play

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That’s definitely not ok!

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Yikes on bikes, bro. That’s a no from me dawg.

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Yeah Ok…Wouldnt be me…

Uh that’s a nope for me!! Not saying he’s “cheating” BUT it sounds like it may be his intent or something he wants to do and maybe she doesn’t, either way it’s shady AF and I would and could never be OK with that💯 I would go anyways and bring your toddler, maybe this girl doesn’t even know you exist or your toddler! And if you guys don’t drive together ( I wouldn’t drive with him anyways, I would just show up unexpected and unannounced ) go anyways! Get dolled up, let him know you aren’t playing around!

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I think you should go with your gut. Shit would absolutely hit the fan if my husband tried taking another woman out for dinner. My husband would never even try that, it’s disrespectful and borderline cheating. I don’t care what your husband says his relationship is with this woman… it’s not right and I don’t trust it. The pictures on his phone and the fact that he didn’t include you are all HUGE red flags.

If your spouse can’t take you then that’s a red flag. I wouldn’t stay with someone that wants to go out by himself with someone

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Have you ever met her?

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I’d be showing up…get a sitter for the baby and just show up.!!!

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Yeah no you got me fucked up I’d show up and fight her :rofl::rofl::rofl:

Lol go follow and have a mom/ kid date at another tableinside and watch lol

Sounds like you are the side chick.

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This is called red flags :triangular_flag_on_post: !!! I would be beyond mad & this is not ok !!! What if you told him you were going with a guy at 8 pm for dinner ??? How would he feel … my lord

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Better hurry and get ready for dinner at 8 is what that sounds like to me :woman_shrugging:t3: :bellhop_bell: ding ding table for fourrrrrrr

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he wants her & is basically saying he doesn’t care how you feel about it…

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Nooope nope nope not ok

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That won’t happen or his clothes would be on the door step

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Sounds like they may have had a fling in the past and they are looking to reconnect. Parenting can be challenging on a relationship. Often times people loose who they are and just want to feel like them selves again. Of course no reason at all to do anything shady but if he had nothing to hide he could have totally invited her over for dinner and had vegan options for her. So everyone could get to know each other. I would just ask him if they have a history and tell him that it makes you a little uncomfortable because you have not met her before and would like to meet her and get to know her a bit more before your comfortable with them doing late night dinners without you!

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Did you post this before? I feel like I just read this ssme thing a couple days sgo.
Regardless; that is not ok. I’d tell him it’s not ok and express how you feel.

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Yes Huge Red Flags!!!

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Take your child and turn up at the dinner table.

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Show up with the baby

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Get a baby sitter and show up that dinner!

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Id show up at the restaurant anyways

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Girl you get a babysitter and pop up. Like “You and me, and this heifer makes three. SURPRISE!!”

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He’s cheating girl, time to leave

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Red flag open your eyes

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Sounds to me like he’s going on a date tonight…so of course he doesn’t want you and the baby to ruin it.
Although, if it were a date … it’s super weird he didn’t hide it

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Something is going on with her and him

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He’s a ass!!! Dump him

You crazy if you put up with a man like that all I got to say

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It absolutely could be a “talk shop” kind of meeting. If I was meeting someone to discuss my profession over dinner, I would not want him to bring his wife and toddler along.

Of course you are a secret. He’s dating that woman. Your whole post is red flag after red flag. Don’t be naive he’s cheating.

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Girl sounds sus as ever. Just pop up if you know the restaurant.

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I swear this post was in another group 2 like a few weeks ago

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He’s [email protected] her. Pack his shit while he’s at dinner and let her have him!

I like the idea people saying drop the kid off at him at the restaurant, or going and sitting beside them or with him lol, if he doesn’t like it bye bye.

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Take a friend and your baby and go enjoy yourself at that damn restaurant!

Poster update us on what you decided to do and how it came out.

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Yeah don’t get your child involved please. Get a sitter and go there

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Yep show up!! Or get someone to babysit…spy for a few and go sit down at their table!!

Well I guess I’m the only one in here that trusts her spouse. I’d give a hug and kiss goodbye put my baby down for bed and this mama would be in the bubble bath with some wine.

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Did that woman include her and their child in the invite?

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You and the baby go too. See how he introduces you. If not done correctly, you do it the right way

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Girl. Dress the part &&& Show up!

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He’s full of crap!..he is not telling you the truth. He is having a relationship with that girl.

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If my husband did this to me his bags would be packed and out the front ready for him to collect after his dinner date.

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That is a date and you aren’t part of it. Plus he has pics of her on his phone?!? I’d be leaving.

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Awh hope your ok some men can be so selfish, xxx

Oh helllllllll no! Girl, that’s nuts!

HELL TO THE NAW!! I would’ve showed up there and introduced myself

Hell no I wouldn’t stand for that , I’d raise hell

Nope! Either I go with or there is no dinner!!

Just show up and say “Hello motherfucker” :relieved::stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye::face_with_hand_over_mouth:

Me and my sisters be going out for dinner that night too :rofl:

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if you needed to “ask,” you should have taken the hint.

8 PM is usually drinks & maybe an appetizer, not really dinner. totally not appropriate for a toddler anyway.

so you always feel the need to tag along?

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Not me putting on my detective hat to see just how friendly they are. You better than me for choosing not to investigate that situation.

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Ok, tomorrow I having dinner with a close male friend and you keeping the baby.

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That is a date and you should show up

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But he has a lot of photos of her on his phone… hmmm. I would show up & see.

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Pshhhh I’d show up with another man that looks 10X better than him. But I’m petty like that. :joy:

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Have a close friend or family member tail him and report back to you! :female_detective:

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Should have offered to get a sitter, then invite yourself.

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Get over yourself. He’s not your pet he can have a work like. Not just that but not all restaurants are child friendly and working with her in the future could be a lot of money. When you work in that industry you would know my soon to be husband does and I did because going back to uni. You do not need to be included in every aspect of his life.

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Leave that boy, periodtttt

Definitely a spy mission

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They have something going no doubt he has you she may have someone but something is going on

Sketchyyyy, I don’t like it. :triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post:

Yikes. Girl. Please find your self worth.

Ya that wouldn’t happen in my house .

Tell him your going out to dinner with one of your guy friends and see how he likes it lol

Follow your gut cause 99.9% of the time our intuition is right.

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If you have to ask here, you already know what’s up lol

I have enough trust with my spouse that it wouldn’t bother me. In fact I’m leaving at 4am to ride a hot air balloon with coworkers tomorrow and my husband just says “enjoy getting up at 4am” lol

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Red flags everywhere!!!

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Lol wait, I can’t wrap my head around this…you see pics of another girl on his phone, plenty of them…then just tells you straight up that he’s going out to dinner, that guy has some big balls…and why are you with this guy?! This has to be a joke :see_no_evil:

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I’d be like I’m going and I’d message her and ask where theyre going to be at.

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That’s where I would have someone babysit and follow !
I wouldn’t stand for that.

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Do you know what restaurant? I mean why can’t you and your toddler just have a dinner date that night, at the same time, at the same restaurant? Just what I would do

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Sounds like a date! Girl get a sitter and get your spy on :laughing: Table for 1 please :eyes:

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You don’t have to like it, but if you don’t trust him, then end it.

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Absolutely not. Completely disrespectful.

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I wouldn’t take my toddler, but I would go.

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Sounds like he’s cheating

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Yeah, I’m crazy and I’d show up to the dinner anyways :woman_shrugging:

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What are you doing !?! Like why are u so calm ? Why are u just so … going a long with it? Stand up for urself ! You’re his WIFE. EFFFF ALL OF THAT.
Absolutely!! Not

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Oh no honey!!! There is no way in hell my man will have pictures of other females in his phone besides the ones I know are friends and family!!! And as far as that diner went and I’m not invited!! That would’ve been it!! Rude is just one thing to name… sounds like you need to get rid of this one, he seems to be interested in her more than a close friend! Bye :wave:

:triangular_flag_on_post: yeah I would follow his ass without him knowing and set myself in a good spot and watch it all unfold. I’d leave my toddler w a family member or a friend and I’d follow. I would also record it so when he try’s to go back and deny it you can tell him that it’s all on video.

I can understand not wanting to take toddler, but I would need a valid reason why I couldn’t go. Or it would be a negative ghost rider

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You lost me at let you!

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