Sometimes I need my phone to help me mentally. Please don’t be too harsh with her. It may be something very health related. I need to distract from the troubles in my head. Counseling is what I suggest.
1 Like
Clearly you two have bigger problems than just phone usage. You both should seek out couples counseling. I am only hearing your perspective. It would be great to hear directly from your wife about what she perceives are the issues in your home.
Otherwise it’s not really fair to give any advice solely on what you say.
maybe your boring like my partner moron 
or your ugly phone might be better pmsl sure 13 year old right these
1 Like
Shut the phone service completely off, and then turn the wifi off and hide it until things get done
1 Like
I would sit dowb and say u cant go on like this anymore limit say an hour a day on the phone maybe jist open up and say how u feel and hopefully that will be enough best of luck
I know for me personally I get lost in my phone like that when I’m depressed and stressed to the max. Kinda of like if I ignore what has me stressed or depressed then it will go away. I would not want to go home and face what had me stressed to the point I would get off work at 1am and sit in my car outside of work until 6 or 7am. My teenage daughter would call me asking me why I wasn’t home. I had been sitting in my car all those hours either reading on my phone or lost in Facebook videos.
Definitely have a sit down conversation with her. Maybe set up some house rules for anyone in the house that has a phone. Like no phones at the dinner table, or family movie night and no phones allowed.
5 Likes
I have this issue because I read ALOT and with kindle its so much easier to get lost on my phone especially when I get off work. I finally broke down and put a timer on my phone. I only use screen time for an hour a day(which is extremely annoying when I’m in a good book)
3 Likes
With kids there is no excuse…I’m a 64 yr old who plays a lot on phone to keep from getting lonesome. She has someone and needs to pay attention. Don’t pay for it…tell her how you feel. Maybe a video of herself so she can see. Good luck
16 Likes
Whatever her issue, it isn’t your problem but her habit is becoming your problem and you need to make her realize how long she’s on it. Most phones you can find the area that logs how long you spend on it and different apps. Find it and show it to her and try to start a very serious conversation about what’s going on, why she does it and how it hurts you and your household and kids/family. I feel you. I sometimes feel the same… Also that when I’m on my phone I’m usually planning, scheduling, and buying and researching, couponing, budgeting, paying bills etc. stuff for our family whereas the others are just playing games or scrolling endlessly most of it.
5 Likes
What would happen if you arranged a long weekend holiday, for yourself and the kids. Ask her to come,without her phone if she doesn’t respond, go anyway. She is probably in denial. Any addiction service may be able to help
I’m not saying it’s a good excuse but I know that I’ve read it can be a trauma response. A way to cope with PTSD or some sort of anxiety going on in her life.
1 Like
No maybe her friends or family are talking to them and I would not be rude and interrupt them it maybe a emergency and there are people want to respectfuly help other people and care for them the proper way with a good heart and it’s true it does make sense and make other people feel good
Maybe you could record her? Put cameras in every room or the car, wherever you know she’ll be. She can deny it all she wants but maybe if she actually SEES herself in the phone always, she’ll realize that it really is a problem
10 Likes
I’d suspend her phone line and change the wifi password. Then when she says something, tell her that it’s time to talk. You could also have some kind of intervention. Film her always on the phone and possibly get a close friend or relative involved. Sit down, show her the evidence and tell her how it’s impacting the family. Having someone else with you will help as they can provide support to help with getting her to listen.
2 Likes
Honestly it sounds like she may need some help. She may be suffering from depression or anxiety or have some kind of other issue in that realm going on. She could either feel like this is an escape of reality, something to consume herself with so she is not consumed by something else going on in her mind, or many other things. Approach with an understanding viewpoint and that you want to help. Tell her the fun things you miss her in (not just the work) like going to the park, playing board games etc. whatever it was before you got to this place. And then offer to help her. Ask what you can do to make this better. Maybe make it a game of sorts, a phone challenge. Or ask her about boundaries you all can make. Like the phones are all on the table from this time to this time unless they ring, etc.
27 Likes
It’s probably a comfort tool like a child carrying around their baby blanket
Sounds like she may have some depression issues or just trying to escape reality a bit.
8 Likes
Maybe ask her what’s going on lol No one that’s truly happy at home just zones out on the phone for hours a day unless it’s to distract themselves from their reality.
5 Likes
I do this when I’m depressed, maybe she’s depressed? I’m sorry!
7 Likes
I know where your coming from. I got little to no help at home with anything when I was with my ex. I wanted to take a hammer to his phone… although he was cheating that’s the only difference. Stop doing everything you do at home. Tend to kids’ needs and their necessities once that is all done. Go for a drive get some you time and let her deal with the rest. It really does put a damper on the household and a relationship. I’d have a serious talk with her. Bc if I was you. The phone would accidentally end up in the water.
1 Like
She probably is depressed. Refusing to pay for it, turning off the wifi, secretly recording, or anything else the along the lines of child like punishments will most likely cause more resentments. While all the points are valid and these things all still need to be done, shes more than likely silently crying out for help by completely shutting down to “phone land”. If it were my spouse, i’d be trying to focus on helping my spouse realize these behaviors aren’t healthy for them and are probably a sign that it’s time to seek some help. Id let them know that I’m here for them without judgement.
9 Likes
Simple … take the phone! Lock it a way … take a day to unhook the entire household… TVs, phones, games… reconnect…
But me… I’d been done thrown that shit in the ground and stomped it! Did it once & lesson learned. His nose is focused on his family.
Maybe her phone is an escape. Kids, housework, etc. is never ending and thankless work. How about a date night? Or a fun project that the two of you can work on together?
2 Likes
It sounds like she’s looking for an escape from reality and a mental break from things. I do it from time to time myself.
Since it’s straining your relationship, can you get a sitter and surprise her with a night away for just the two of you? No phones allowed, maybe a massage and a movie? Something to get you both reconnected and give you both a break.
2 Likes
Well, when she is off the phone completely ignore her. Like no one is talking to you. Make her feel like nobody is there. Maybe that way she’ll get the point.
I’m not a fan of ultimatums. But sounds like you need to adamantly out your foot down. Ignoring your kids for a phone is never okay.
1 Like
I read this as im on my phone zoning out because my spouse wanted to fight today. There’s definitely a reason to zone out and no one is that addicted except my 13 year old.
1 Like
She need HELP (ASAP)
Phone monitor screen time. Have her look at it and challenge her to decrease it.
Take it and hide it when she’s asleep. Force her to “wake up”.
My partner is exactly the same!
Ask her to agree to certain times that conform to your free time to have PHONE FREE time together. She is addicted to technology and it’s easy to do. You hop from one thing to another, checking your balance, then fb, then a recipe, then something you want to shop for on Amazon, then you get a texting flurry going on with a friend and… and… and…She has to be more cognizant of her responsibility to the relationship. If she won’t conform to no phone hours throughout the day ask her to go to couples counseling
I feel sorry for your kids as well. This is Really Horrible! Like the other lady said ,Video her so she can see for her self.
Kenny did you post this?
1 Like
She’s definitely using it as an escape from her responsibilities. Idk what kind of phone she has but most now and days have an option to track your screen time. If not I’m sure there’s an app for it. Phones are so distracting that so much time passes by and you don’t won’t even realize it. Ask her if she’d agree to a set time where you both lock your phones away for family time with no distractions.
Try talking to her without getting angry. Relationships live and die on communication. Don’t turn off WiFi or try to act like her boss. That will not solve anything but make her resentful like others are saying. You want to work things out not make her mad.
2 Likes
We do “electronic free weekends” for a similar reason. Everyone, including the kids, would stay on electronics all day whether it is the phone or video games. So we started doing “electronic free weekends” so that we can actually spend time together as a family. The only times an electronic is used is when it is absolutely needed (such as if a client calls my work phone or my boss calls etc) or if we are watching a movie together
Do not take your wife’s phone, do not turn your wife’s WiFi off, do not turn your wife’s data off … that is a form of power & ABUSE, wether you like to hear that or not.
Maybe you should invite her to a therapy appointment together so you both can talk about it with a professional & come to a conclusion on the issue, maybe she’s depressed & doesn’t know it or needs some help.
2 Likes
If you go into settings it tells you screen time. Then no denial
My husband does that!
U must see him washing dishes phone is next to him hands washing the dishes face towards phone😂
1 Like
Maybe she needs a break from life. If this just started she maybe over worked & tired.
Just saying, maybe OP spends all of his hours playing video games smoking with his friends so she feels alone and exhausted after working so instead of bitching she tries to put her focus into something else to save the fight. 
3 Likes
Whew, these comments are insane. I can’t imagine how it must feel having all the weight of the household on your shoulders while your wife is zoned out like a teenager. I would talk to her about everything this post says. And hopefully things change sooner than later. Sometimes as a married couple we have to pull the extra weight for our partner when one of us are struggling, but it shouldn’t be forever. You’re not a single parent and she’s gotta step up and put the phone down. Her family, her kids, y’all’s household, marriage, livelihood, etc is at stake and no stinking cell phone is worth taking time from all that.
7 Likes
My sister does this too! It’s obnoxious and rude. She can’t even hold an entire conversation with someone without looking at her phone. My dad was just as bad, only with the FB app 
, so he actually deleted the app and has been SO much better!
1 Like
Buy a timed lock box and ask for a hour of family time and an hour of “us” time every day…
My ex was like this. If he wasn’t sleeping his phone was in his hand and often enough even when he was sleeping it was glued to his hand. Needless to say one of the reasons we are no longer together. Combined with a lot of others. But it’s hard to have a relationship with someone who is always stuck some where u arnt. Video games, phones or other devices etc. It takes effort from both parties to have a healthy relationship and a lot of people don’t want to put forth any
It sounds like the responsibility has become a bit overwhelming for her and she’s seeking an escape and unfortunately that’s become an addiction.
I would speak to her calmly and lovingly like I’ve noticed you’re spending a lot of time on your phone and out in the car, how are you feeling? I’m feeling a bit abandoned and worried. I’d like to try and understand and for us to work this out.
Women get burned out with the emotional and mental load of family life.
Addictions unfortunately come in many forms from technology, food, alcohol, exercise not just drugs and gambling
13 Likes
Make the phone have an accident
2 Likes
I would suggest therapy for her and determine if she is stressed out or overwhelmed. Especially with everything going on in the world it is effecting everyone differently.
Yall know damn well if a woman posted this exact question, yall would say “ruuun” or “hes talking to another female” blah blah blah. Now its a man posting this and all I see is “maybe she just needs a break”…NAH!!! Take that damn phone away from her. If she flips out about it, end the relationship. If she compromises, then there ya go. 
21 Likes
Sounds like she might be depressed and disassociating. She needs therapy and probably medication. Good luck dear, I hope everything works out.
1 Like
My husband does this when he’s overwhelmed.
she’s most likely unhappy. do not take away her phone, she’s not a child.
2 Likes
I do this when my depression is really bad and I need to adjust my meds.
1 Like
Talk to her and tell her there are times she can’t be on the phone. Tell her it’s all too much for you to do on your own and it isn’t fair.
If someone cant see the time they spend there is an app on most phones and in the app. Stores that clocks your time on every app
There’s definitely a reason behind why, you got to work together on this
Look up gaming addiction onl8ne, and give her the information. Like any addiction, you can’t make her change, you just have to give her the information and support to help her once she decides.
“Take away her phone” is she a child:rofl:
Shes a grown ass adult
1 Like
I don’t know about her phone but my phone tells me how long I’ve been online for. When it was almost as much as my job I said let’s limit this a little bit.
Text her and send her videos of you and the kids lol might help
7 Likes
Yea , she’s gone 
she’s already left y’all
2 Likes
Anna Jeannette Schneider
Jaimi Stahl good idea…tell her you miss her presence and tell her why you miss her so much. NO lecture
She needs a reality check. She has kids. Put down the damn phone.
1 Like
Walk away from her after filming her bad habit and leave her to run the house while you have time out, find something that you enjoy
Turn the phone off especially if you’re paying for it!
I realized I was on my phone constantly, after I was getting on him constantly about being on it too much. Most phones have a screen time monitor on them. Have her look at hers to maybe get a point across.
Also watch “the social dilemma” on netflix, it was an eye opener to me.
Now I make sure the only notifications I get are calls, texts and emails. No app or game alerts or social media alerts, they can wait. Good luck 
Be straight forward and tell that her being on her phone constantly has put a strain on your relationship, not only is her overuse taking time away from you but from your kids. It sounds like an addiction and just because it’s not drugs or alcohol does not mean it’s not an issue that needs to be worked on.
My fiance is the same way anymore… He used to never even use FB much but now since he upgraded his phone, that’s all he ever is really doing. 
Gotta love feeling miles away when you’re right next to each other…
Honestly it sounds like she’s experiencing depression or anxiety, and doesn’t realize it, see if you can get her to talk with her doctor. Keep a journal/log of how often this occurs daily so you can show both her and her doctor, she might not realize how much time she’s on her phone and away from the family. With how this past year has been, anxiety and depression in all age groups has skyrocketed. Good luck.
2 Likes
She may be experiencing anxiety and/or depression and her phone relieves it temporarily. Talk to her about it. I’m sure there is a deeper issue that needs to be resolved.
3 Likes
Super sad. I wonder what males her phone so important? Maybe you and the kids take off for the weekend and see if she can put things in perspective.
Take her phone aways from her she needs a life lol
Physical ailments and cancers come from that!
It might be time for a good old ultimatum
That women is depressed… Nje… Case closed.
Use only a landline and sex is a much better habit.
talk with her and explain how you feel.
1 Like
Take her phone away when she is in the shower…
I’d suggest couples counseling, and If that doesn’t work I’d seriously consider a divorce
That phone would disappear lol🤣
Shit I’m on my phone all day everyday and yes I have had ppl bitch at me about it but idgaf what ppl have to say or think… Yes one of the ppl that bitched is my room mate bc I sit in the living room and be on my phone while he is trying to sleep or watch tv.
Tell her how you feel
Let it go life is to short