So, if y’all only have her bi-weekly, that means that you get to have your wife every other week, and your step daughter gets to have her mom every other week.
That seems fair, and like a sacrifice you’re just going to have to make and accept for the time being. It’s very important to both your wife and your step daughter that they get to spend some quality time together on the weeks they get to see each other. I’m guessing she’s young, bc this wouldn’t work if she was school aged. So mom is probably trying to get in all the time she can now while she’s able to, bc once she’s old enough for school, she’ll have even less time with her.
It sounds like you’re more concerned with getting laid than you are about how your wife and step daughter feel or what their needs are, tbh. This relationship may not be right for you. It doesn’t sound like you’re ready to put either of them first.
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1: kudos to step daddy for caring.
2: without knowing the age of the child, school age, and how late is late, find out what time bed time is at the other home, and try to follow it. Communicate to mom, you need to set a routine with the other household. Good luck.
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Having kids period takes a toll on your sex life bro😂 imagine if she had full custody. I’m guessing she doesn’t because you said bi-weekly. Do you have children? Have you ever been forced to only see them 5 days a month??? Then get some perspective my man. She’s spending all the time she can with her.
Children need proper sleep. Maybe she gets that at her father’s house. This may be a concern for him as well as a parent.
That is hard and step in and puther to bed start overriding her and see what that brings.
How old is the child and what time is the child going to bed?
How old is your step daughter?
What time is she staying up until?
Routine is important as well is sleep for a child.
Nights that I work late my husband puts our son to bed before I get home. Is that something you could be doing with your step daughter?
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How old is the child? What you have to understand about a mother is our “lasts” with our child is important and we never know when our last snuggle, cuddle, kiss or hug will be our last. So we tend to hang on to whatever closeness we are getting with our child especially when it’s our last child or only child.
It’s not ok if it affecting the child in any way such as school especially. This is something you need to talk about with your wife!
They are only young once. It is important for her to spend as much time as possible with her child. With her work schedule that is difficult. Make the sacrifice now and you will find that she more than makes up for it later. Stop making it an issue.
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Is that the only reason? How old is she? Very young or a teenager. I thought you were going to say the child is not getting enough sleep, she is cranky, her work isn’t getting done, she is getting into bad habits. None of those things are happening may be she doesn’t get to see her as much with custody and that is her time for quality visiting.
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Having kids or marrying someone who has kids you have to learn to Compromise… if you only have her bi weekly then you can have sex the weeks she’s not there… she wants to spend time with her child and honestly if she only get ma the child every other week that’s more important
How old is the child? And routine is key especially in a split household. I struggle with my ex keeping my daughter on a good routine like I have set for her at my house.
If the child is getting up on time with minimal fighting, not falling asleep in school, and things like that, you gotta suck it up. Because I can guarantee that she just wants as much time as she can get with her. It’s definitely something that can be discussed, but watch your approach and don’t make it all about sex either. Because if that’s your only issue, then you guys have BIGGER issues to resolve.
First off, communication is key. But make sure when you’re communicating lthat you do so in a non confrontational way. Dont be hostile and try to be willing to listen and understand what she is saying. It seems like she only gets to spend so much time with her. It’d heartbreaking that she only sees her bi weekly. It sounds like she gets more time with you than her daughter. Is there anyway that you can ask her if you guys could come to a solid middle ground? You don’t want to sound like it’s just about sex because that is a turn off for SOME woman. Also, you could try to be more romantic on the days where she doesn’t have her that way your your not starving for some hoo-ha?! Lol. Be sensitive in the way that you approach this as you don’t want to make it seem like you have a problem with her daughter. There is a fine line here that you don’t want to cross because she could start to resent you and think that you don’t like her kid or ur trying to make her choose between the two of you. I think you could approach this by compromising. Ask her if you can compromise and then come up with a plan. Perhaps say that if she gets to bed at a normal hour then that means you can get up early for a special family breakfast.
If it’s the weekend find but if it’s during the week, thr daughter should be going to bed at a decent time, so it doesn’t affect her and her schooling.
Bi weekly sex is a thing bruh, grow up! Take that week off. That’s her baby and she’s gonna spend maximum time with!
You need to talk to your wife. You married her and knew she had a daughter, her over the fact you don’t get sex all the time for 1. Talk to your wife, I don’t think kids (depends on age though), should be staying up late. It affects their mood and a whole heap of other things. There needs to be some rules in place, maybe your wife needs to change her shift on those weeks you guys have the daughter. Idk just an idea.
I believe you can wait on the sex 
and you don’t mention how old the daughter is! Age makes a huge difference!
So this is because you wanna have sex? You’ve got two hands. Enjoy, even switch it up if you want… oooh, stranger in the house it’s lefts turn. She’s spending time with her daughter. I don’t know what you thought you’d get from this
He said biweekly so she shares 50/50 with her ex. She has her for a week then doesn’t for a week. There isn’t enough context but if she’s school aged she most certainly have a decent bedtime.
I don’t understand. Are you watching the child while your wife works 3- 11pm?
Is your wife then coming home and WAKING the kid up???
Because if you’re the sitter, you obviously had the child asleep in bed long before then, right?
Also are you really complaining because your sex life suffers on alternate weeks when the kid is around???
If the answer to that is yes, you need to grow up.
Two issues here…If she only has her every other week I feel like you should be more considerate of their time together. The second, if you’re married THAT’S YOUR KID TOO!
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And here I thought you came here out of concern for your stepdaughter. Jokes on me I guess You want her in bed at a decent hour so you can have sex. You don’t even have her full time! YOU WILL BE OK! Let this mama be w her daughter!
These comments r funny. He has every right to want his wife to. That child should have a set bedtime no matter what. Her marriage needs love to. Geez.
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You sound like a selfish prick. Like, sex is fun maybe but ew, dude. She wants to spend time WIT HER KIDDO and if you can’t accept that maybe you shouldn’t have gotten with someone who has a kid.
So you’re only upset because she’s spending time with her daughter and you’re not getting laid?
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You have plenty of time to get laid when she’s not over. Get over yourself.
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Good bedtime routine is so important for kiddos.
It sounds like your wife just wants to enjoy what time she can with the child.
And that’s absolutely okay! But also children need a good bedtime routine.
I would open up to her. Tell her how you feel. Communication is the biggest key to a successful marriage. Even on the tough conversations. Good luck 
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It sounds like she is trying to get as much time as she can with her daughter. Spice it up when her daughter isn’t there… But unfortunately unless it’s affecting the daughter (not being able to stay awake during school, etc) then this isn’t going to be a battle that you’re going to win being that her daughter is only there bi weekly
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I feel you probably should have lead with it’s negatively impacting the child, rather than your sex life 
You’re gona get chewed up and spit right out in this group lol.
Sorry man but her kid comes first.
So take My advice and lead with how it isn’t good for the child.
I get both sides here. There definitely needs to be some balance here. So does he need to wait until her daughter is 18 years old for her to spend time with him as well? There is nothing wrong with him feeling this way. They need to plan out nights that his step daughter can stay up and nights that his wife spends with him. It isn’t fair to him either. I’m sure he’s been patient enough and wants attention from his wife! I see nothing wrong with that. You just need to communicate with your wife and figure out a plan so that everyone is happy! It shouldn’t be 1 sided in a marriage! That’s why a lot of marriages fail because people get selfish!
It’s not your child so in the end you ultimately have no say, especially since she clearly hasn’t given you any say.
Is sex seriously THAT important. If she got into a wreck today and couldn’t have sex for a really long time would you leave? If she somehow died today would you miss the sex the most? Kids are only kids for a little bit of time. She works a hard shift she’s just trying to spend time with her kid. Sex isn’t that important, and it is NEVER more important than bonding with your children.
Is it possible that due to her schedule, she allows the child to stay up so that she can spend time with her?
I understand your frustration, because having “adult time” and alone time with your spouse is important, but her having time with her child is also important.
Sit her down and come to a compromise that works for both of you.
I just want to warn you to watch who you take advice from on here because there are some very rude, man hating women in this group. You’ll know who they are when you read their responses. Ignore those women.
Well dad i say grab that sex during the other 2 weeks …
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Like I’m seriously not trying to be an asshole but what are you doing? Laying around mad because you’re not getting laid? If this was about the child showing stress signs from lack of sleep ok Maybe you should put your two cents about it to your wife. If this is legit about you not feeling like you’re getting enough you’ve got a problem dude. Are you up with them? Are you showing that they matter? From here it just sounds like a dude mad and pouting In bed while an over worked momma is up loving her kid.
Routine is important for children. So is sleep. We worked opposite shifts when our children were young. The one on early worked 7am ‐2pm backs were 2pm ‐ 10pm. Our child went to bed 8pm ‐ 8am. we swapped shifts weekly and of course we missed our child when working but thats life . Time with our children is important as is adult time after work. Hard when you only see the child part time but they still need a proper routine
Then u put the kid to bed.
Aw your poor thing. How dare she put her limited time with her child before your sexual gratification. The only problematic piece here is you. I hope she reads this so she can leave you.
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Being a single momma by choice, both of my girls are adopted, I understand both sides. I think their needs to be some compromise. Time with my daughters is #1 and I couldn’t imagine being away from them, or only seeing them bi-weekly. So I understand mom’s perspective. Dad I sense some resentment or jealousy if I’m being honest. Was the situation like this from the start? If you entered this relationship and these arrangements were in place and now you want to have a problem with it, um no sir. Your wife doesn’t see a problem she is going through the motions with the time she is given. If this is a recent change of routine than I feel a talk is warrented. Share how you feel and talk about compromise or ways time can be shared. Best of luck.
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So you’re whining about your sex life being affected by your wife choosing to spend time with her daughter? Just wanna make sure I got that straight……
I wonder how different the comments would be if it was the mama posting this. I think personally he should find a dad group, because other mothers go through the same thing but get told different things, as a father/Dad/Stepdad it’s your place to set communication lines & boundaries as well but you also have to let the mother KNOW in a decent communication level because it may be taking a toll on her as well. But she may not be speaking about it.
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Umm guys I don’t think he’s saying she shouldn’t spend time with her child. For fact that wasn’t even mentioned. The routine of having a bed time is the problem. I understand both sides. Letting her stay up sets up failure if she’s already started school and if she hasn’t, when she does. This guy isn’t criticizing that she’s spending time with her daughter. Y’all be nice. Hes just like everybody else, he’s asking for advice; not to be trampled on
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I was ready to be with you on this, if you’d mentioned it affecting the child’s school work, her getting up in the morning, or attitude. But you made it all about you and getting laid? Ew. Let that woman spend time with her baby girl. Every other week and the work schedule means she hardly gets to see her. How selfish of you.
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If you want a marriage to work then you need to communicate your needs to her. Maybe she doesn’t realize it’s bothering you? Yeah her daughter is important but if she can’t balance both relationships then she shouldn’t be in one. She can get time with her daughter as well as her partner without needing to spend every waking second with her kid. I love my kids more than life but I also value my partner and his needs as well. Nothing will change without communication though so like I said you should probably just talk to her about it.
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Depending on the age of the child I can see the issue. If tween or teenager they stay up late no matter what you tell them to do because it’s the act put stage of life remember your teenage years did you go to bed at a decent time or stay up late. If you only have your step kid bi weekly I don’t see how its taking a toll on your intimate life when you have a week kid free
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50% of the time is not “every night”.
Let her enjoy her time with her daughter while she’s there. The other 50% is her time to spend with you. I would focus on what you’re doing with your 50% of the time instead of trying to place blame on a kids lack of bedtime routine every other week. Ridiculous to be complaining about lack of sex every other week while your partner is trying to spend time with their kid 
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Get your rocks off the other 2 weeks 
let her spend time with her kid. There’s 
too. Sounds like you’re trying to control everyone’s bed time so you go to bed happy.
Okay, first and foremost it speaks volumes that you would go this far to ask for advice, that is a great move on your part as her husband. That being said, if she works so late, why aren’t you as dad doing dinner, bathtime, and bedtime at a decent hour before mom gets home? When I work swing shift I would never ever expect my children to stay up so late just for me to see them longer, I feel like that isn’t beneficial to the child at all. If you don’t want to take it upon yourself to get her to bed, then speak with mom and tell her your feelings, and ask if she can begin bedtime routine when she gets home from work. Then she’s spending time with her and still getting her to bed at a decent hour. Your thoughts and feelings are just as important because like people wanna point out above, yes you chose to be a step dad, but she also chose you to be her husband, and shouldn’t ignore your feelings.
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She’s trying to spend time with her daughter any way she can. Get over it. Im sure you can find other times for intimacy.
Is this the only time she gets to spend with her?
Have you asked her why she wants to keep her up? I mean no offense, but it sounds like you want it all your way without communicating with her to see her reasoning and trying to compromise. I can understand the frustration, but you two need to work it out rather than just tell her she NEEDS to parent a certain way. Maybe you can compromise by seeing if on the weeks she doesn’t have her daughter, you two can spend quality time together, whether it be intimate or not, and connect then. Also maybe you can try to stay up a night or two and bond with them together. I dont know if you have any children that you have split custody over, but if not then you have to try and see it from her point of view. Thats her baby and she’s going to try to get as much time as she can. They’re only children for a short time. It may seem like it lasts forever but as a mother I can tell you the days are long, but the years are short. During the day it can feel like it drags on and on, but at the same time it feels like 2 days ago my now 6th grader was snuggling with me on the couch with his sippy cup watching cartoons. So my suggestion is show some empathy, let her know that you emphasize with her situation, then explain the problems you have and see if you guys can compromise. With a relationship, when it comes to the big stuff, especially kids, neither one of you can completely have it how you want it. You have to find a middle ground.
Tell her that it’s not good for a child’s health to stay up that late
How late are we talking about and how old is said child. But as for quality time with each other… that’s important too. But kids need steady routines even if it doesn’t go with mom or dads schedule. Child need to go to bed at a decent time aside from a non school night.
All I hear is " me me me me me " how old is the daughter? Is it affecting her ?
I can’t imagine being away from my kids, I’d probably do the same thing.
Lol you want her daughter to go to bed so you can have sex. Says it all.
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Boo fuckin hoo. Some couples doesn’t have sex for months at a time. Bi weekly ok, so you have your wife the other two weeks…you must have sex then so it’s not putting a stop to y’all sex life. Why does it always have to be about sex? Why can’t it be about quality one on one time over a meal or watching a movie…maybe she give you sex those two weeks she doesn’t have her kid to make up for the two weeks that she does and she spends it with her child that she doesn’t get to see but two weeks out of the month. If I was in her shoes I’d do it, now in your shoes shut up and join her and her daughter. Plus you made yourself as the step dad, play that role. Step dad’s get to have that bond with the kid like a dad does. FYI maybe her daughter would like to have a step dad that she can come to when she can’t go to her parents… I know I like having a step dad…plus I don’t have my bio dad(r.i.p) even before he died I didn’t have no contact but that’s not my point. My point is join into the activities they are doing.
Melatonin helps but to top it off why would you marry someone who isn’t allowing you to parent a child that you gained by marriage it boggles my mind I just can’t
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I feel like all these mamas are being really rude just because you said you’re a man. What you should do is ask the other parent what their schedule is. Think what’s best for the child. I coparent with my sons dad and at his house they sleep at 8:30pm and I think that’s a decent time! It would be in the child’s best interest to keep her in similar schedules! I completely agree a child shouldn’t be awake super late but I also understand mama wanting to spend time with baby. It’s hard BUT in my opinion I’d rather make sure my daughter is on a healthy schedule even if it made me sad or try to switch shifts at my job in order to make things better. Talk to your wife and just be really compassionate and word things in a overly nice way. 
I’m Sorry you’re going through that papa!
It’s selfish for her to do that. The girl likely has to change her sleep routine significantly every time she changes households. She can spend time with her before she goes to work. Or look for a job with a schedule that will let her spend time with her daughter. But it’s selfish to make a kid go through drastically changing bedtime and routine every 2 weeks.
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I agree with your wife, children only stay young for awhile then they go off on their own. Love them and include them in your life and love it. They need you both. It won’t be long till they will be going their own ways. I promise you will miss this closeness it does not last long enough. Let your daughter enjoy you both as their time with you at these times only last for awhile. So be kind to your wife and daughter you will be glad u did. Children are only children for a short time then they are gone. So enjoy them and their lives while you can. You will never regret it.
She works all the time and is trying to spend every second she can with her daughter. She can’t get that time back. It sounds like your only issue with it is that it’s taking her time away from you. You want her to give up what little time she has with her daughter TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU?! Her child comes before you. You sound jealous and selfish. Maybe if you tried spending time with them you wouldn’t feel so “alone”. Also, if you need sex that bad, you have 2 perfectly good hands. Let her bond with her daughter.
Grow the hell up.
My concern wouldn’t be about your sex life… it would be about the child. If rhe child is in school then that could be come an issue, and if there’s shared custody or a custody agreement usually its beneficial to stick to the same sleep routine at both house holds. But if child isn’t in school and it doesn’t effect her sleeping patterns at other parents house then If mom wants to spent time with her daughter when mom is done work then that’s up to mom.
Imagine being so hurt that someone cherish the limited time they have with their child.
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First of all he’s asking for help and advice. All I see is negative comments. This world is full of hate and I’m sick of it! To the man that is asking for advice just talk to her that’s all.
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Quality time with you and her daughter are both important. But no way would I let my children stay up to silly times of night. They need their sleep more than we do for their bodies to develop and function no matter their age.
You’re a grown man and that is her child. Imagine her being attracted to you when you’re jealous of her literal daughter. Ew.
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Yea but what time is that? 9? 10? You can’t stay up any later some nights? Or have her wake you up when she comes to bed?
I would do the same with my kids. She’s trying to spend all the time with her child that she can. You sound selfish.
She’s not going to get it till you do something like start watching Porn or worse… many women are naive to their husbands needs and human nature. Try to talk to her and if she still doesn’t care to make you happy and put your marriage and intimacy first then maybe she’s just selfish and doesn’t care. Then you have to start thinking about what will make you happy.
Yea no the child ND her deserve time together. Just because it’s outside of the social norm time and your not getting laid don’t mean it’s wrong.
She has her baby bi weekly. She’s prioritizing her child. You’re prioritization your sex life.
I’m sorry, but get over it.
How much sleep is the child getting? All I see is selfish what about me and my sexual needs and nothing that is helpful. I see nothing wrong with what the mother is doing for her child. Children come first. This is why I support so many times a month hire a sitter and have date night for your relationship. What you’re demanding is counterproductive and you sound find someone with out children if you’re letting this affect your relationships.
Ok so all three of my kids are with my full time. My oldest is not my husband’s however the 2 littler ones are (4&6). We went through some sleepless nights and no sex several times bc the Littles ones are 19 months apart plus we both work. So I say kids are only little for a short period of time she wants to enjoy her daughter while she can. Especially I she doesn’t live with her full time she is cherishing the counting days that her daughter wants to stay up with her. My little ones arr glued to my hips, my oldest wants her space and everytime she does want to smother me I soak it up. My husband would NEVER come between me and my 3 girls. I think you should take this time and reflect what you want out of life. Bc if yall 3nd up having kids you will experience the same thing at different points in your marriage. It’s life, communicate, stay up a little later, wake up earlier. Make time for each other without taking from YOUR stepdaughter.
You could put her to bed then sounds like she’s trying to spend time with her
Her wanting to keep the daughter up to spend time with her is just as selfish as u wanting the kid to go to bed…the kid needs a bedtime routine it depends on the age of the child how much sleep she needs. If the child is staying up late but sleeps late in the morning that is fine now but when she goes to school that wont fly which means changing the routine which means a hard long drawn out situation that’s even harder on everyone… maybe show your wife some literature and sleep studys done with children that show the benefits of a good bedtime routine for children
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I’m curious what time that is? What time does she get home from work? And if you can’t put your personal needs off on a biweekly schedule then maybe she’s not the one for you… That’s her mama. That’s a bond like no other. Let her be a mother.
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How old is the daughter? I definitely always agree children need a stable bedtime and it should be the same at both households to keep the child on a schedule.
He’s being very selfish here and just worried about not having sex
As others have said communication is key but it sounds like you have tried that, so now on the non bi weeks start sleeping in your chair or on the couch after a few nights of her being alone it might click.then it’s time to talk again so you both understand where the other is coming from
Either way when that child goes to school she needs a stable bedtime regardless of her mom’s work schedule.
What is the bed time and age of the child? Does the child have activities? Homework? What is bed time at dad’s house? What do you think is a decent bed time? When do you go to bed? All of this factors into this.
Well I think it really depends what age the child is, what time she allows her to stay up till, what kind of routine are they on. Work, school?
I think you need to sit and have a serious conversation with your wife. Whether she wants that extra time with your step-daughter or is just plain not caring what time she goes to bed, kids need routine, not to mention sleep!, and it isnt okay if it is disrupting your life, either. When a couple is married it isnt yours or mine, it is OURS, and you parent children together, whether they are biologically yours or not. My husband is our oldest’s step-dad, but he treats her as if she is his own, and we agreed when we first got together that he would be as much of a parent as i am and have an active role, and his opinion, feelings, etc., matter. Of course we have disagreements, and some hiccups along the way, but it is important if you want either of them to respect you, you need to have a conversation with your wife. Is it possible she can shift bid and get a better shift? Swing shifts suck unless they are daytime swing shifts (my husband works an 8 hour swing shift every other thursday). Good luck, but no, you arent wrong here, imo. Children need routine, and there are guidelines as to how much sleep each age should be getting.
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Sounds to me like she is doing some guilty parenting to me by not settling rules and is being her friend im speaking from my own self experience with this as I didn’t realize and wouldn’t listen to those around me telling me I was doing this one day I actually seen what I was doing and I had to admit to myself what I had been doing was buying them everything and giving them everything and never saying no when I definitely should have been because in my subconscious mind I was making up for all the time I was losing with them because of my chaotic work schedule I was working 70 plus hours a week some weeks 94 and 96 hours a week and my mom and sisters were doing all the things I should have been doing and no im not or have I ever been a single parent as dad and I are still together and married for 18 years next month together 20 and he has an even crazier chaotic schedule as a swing shift supervisor that gets called in every single off day so I was giving and being their friend at a very young age as they are only 11 months apart I was 35 when my first came along and 36 when the second miracle came along also I was never supposed to have children wich I was devastated by so when I became a mom I swore they would never want for anything well I was doing just that well in materialistic things I was but the one thing they needed and wanted from me was me was my time not the things that money could buy them so I quit my job and have been correcting my mistakes slowly with them and they are so proud when they ask if they can go to a friend’s or something and I say no they love being able to say I’m not allowed to do that or I can’t go thus time lol believe it ir not my daughter was so proud that she had gotten grounded for the first time in life she is 12 that she told her friends that she was grounded and they said yeah ok khloey and she was like no seriously iam really grounded I understand this dad’s concerns and issues with this as my husband and I hadn’t shared the same b3d for 10 years since the girls were born basically they would not sleep unless in bed with me if we tried by midnight they were both in their so until they started getting older and wanting to have more independence my oldest went first to her own room and lived it they youngest still sleeps in my room but in her own bed they are great kids play every sport they can fit into their schedules and are great in academics but when it comes to me and them we are still working on correcting all the issues this momma caused and I apologize to them daily for all my short comings I think this mama needs to to step back and really look at what she is doing and I mean this truly with much to her and to the step dad I’m a step parent as well grown now but you absolutely do have a say in things in your home and relationships you need to have communication with your spouse for sure being a step parent isn’t for the weak at heart for sure and key is communication and try to talk to her not at her there’s a difference ask her why she is doing this and why she thinks it’s helping her daughter or her I hope this helps you sweetie this was hard to write because it’s often hard to admit our own faults and failures and like anyone else I absolutely am embarrassed to say the least at my failure of my girls but I thrive ha4d daily to be a better mom than I was the day before keep putting one foot in front of another there will be many more bigger issues in the future that you will have to come together to defeat
Sounds like “Dad” is home watching this child while Mom works until 11 or 12 am. So Dad, why haven’t YOU established a bedtime routine and early sleep habits earlier in the evening?
For example; finish homework, have some turkey and milk or oatmeal cookies and milk (both combos are sleep inducing), have her take a warm bath, then off to bed. Depending on her age, you could read her a story or allow her 15-30 mins to read quietly then lights out. I would get her a small reading light to use for reading so the rest of the room stays dark. Wishing you the best.
It almost sounds to me like she is trying to get as much time with her as possible when she has her, is she spending that time with her when she is staying up late?
Facts: your spouse should always come first after your childrens basic needs are met.
There should be boundaries in place for bedtime and homework. My step daughter who we have bi-weekly, is the same way. She doesn’t go to bed until after 10pm or later. She will come home from school and sleep until 6pm or so. She’s on her phone texting friends and has social media accounts (she’s 12).
I have told her dad about how much this affects us and our time together, but he just says, “aw. I know how her mother is and treats her. She needs to be somewhere calm and peaceful.” She has zero chores to do, begged for a kitten she doesn’t care for, she complains the kitten isn’t in her room and would rather be downstairs with the other cats. It’s a battle, yes. Make some house rules and consequences for her with the mom. Then mom needs to stick to them. Good luck.
Hold on she’s only there bi weekly n u don’t want them to spend has much time as they can together. U have the wife the rest of the time. Let the child have her mother u can have sex ne other time
Unfortunately you’re not her parent. You can’t make parenting decisions for her. Maybe talk to the father. I’m sure he’s having trouble keeping any sort of routine on his weeks. Possibly the 2 of you can figure something out. Im assuming this child isn’t in school, or at least hope she’s not. A poor sleep routine is going to cause behavior problems in school.
I agree with him, he willingly chose to join the family, to take the fatherly role, they are a team, she should respect his concerns and hear him out. If children don’t have a sleep schedule or don’t get enough sleep, it physically shows(looking tired, bags under eyes/dark shadows under eyes), depending on where they live, they can be reported to CPS for sleep deprivation/child neglect. I’m being serious about it, schools pay attention.
If she didn’t want help with raising the child then she should have stayed single. Sex shouldn’t be a priority, there’s more to life than sex, Men feel loved/bonded when sex is involved continuously. It’s just how they are wired, when they don’t “get it”, to them it feels like a personal attack even though that’s not usually the intention. Marriage is about teamwork and respecting each other’s voices. Just talk to each other, make sure both sides get heard. If what you need is physical intimacy then talk to her and see how she is feeling. Being a working mom and not having enough time with her daughter affects the mind. It’s not just one person’s emotion thats important. Try and work it out, remember her feelings matter just as much as his own.
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She may feel like she doesn’t spend enough time with her. But the child does need to go to bed at a decent time.
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Have to explained and actually stated your issue? Not just that your sex life is being affected?
I mean it all sounds pretty good until you read to that part then it just sounds like you’re upset because you want to get laid and she wants to spend time with her kid. You have to decide if that is the actual problem. Her child will and always should be her number 1 priority. You also didn’t mention how old the kid was. Where is she before your wife gets off work on the weeks that she is with your wife? Do you keep her? Have YOU thought about trying to put her to bed? You can’t force your wife not to spend time with her child.
So, if this is only because of your lack of sex… that’s a you issue.
Cuddles in the morning? Good luck. Lol
Why do you have to have sex when your stepdaughter is there? You have your wife alone a few days a week…. Do it then. In the meantime let your wife spend time with her daughter. You’re being a baby!
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Maybe she uses the child as an excuse to come to bed when your asleep because you feel like sex is a right and must when married with how you come across.
What’s the relationship like when the child’s not there what time do you consider too late? How old is said child? All make a difference to right answer
Would you feel same if it was your child?
Your whole tone regards problematic is off putting alone.
Tread very lightly
You will never become before a child and rightly so.
How old is your bonus daughter and what time is wife putting her to bed?
I will say the way you worded it comes of self centered. Like your biggest concern is about sex. You knew she had a child when you married her. They are a package deal. While I agree that children need a bedtime so they can get enough sleep…I don’t think it’s right to complain about your sex life. A lot of parents have a lull in sex when it’s their week/weekend with their kids.