I need advice! My 14 yr old son just tested + for coke. I knew he’s been smoking weed but now this. What should/can I do to get him on the right path?!
Scare his ass. Like have the police talk to him.
Rehab. Even being so young they will make his sober up and he will be surrounded by addicts that might make him uncomfortable.
Rehab, he needs professional help
Talk to his doctor right away. Figure out options and get a treatment plan in action.
Relocating can help to, you need to get him away from the “friends” he has now.
Also a talk therapist to figure out WHY he’s wanting to use.
Whoever he gets his weed off, could be weighing up both weed and coke on the same scales. I would ask and if not, rehab!
Approach your kid and get to know him, do not push or he’ll react defensively. Talk to a Dr and get him in a program, participate on as much as you can on those programs
I would speak to him and have him seek help! Forcing him into rehab will NOT fix the problem! A person can and will only change when they are ready!
Be real about it, ask him how it made him feel? And if it’s something he plans on doing again. And prepare yourself to dish out facts of drug abuse. Open communication
A lot of energy drinks and such can cause false positives on these tests, dont know if you’re aware of that
It could have been laced … Talk to him… And ground the living hell out of him and stay ontop everything hes doing … Thats crazy im sorry
Just support him, be,there,for him… And also tough love get him,the help he,needs. Prayers
Have him go to rehab he might not want the help but at least he will learn some tools if he one day wants to get and stay sober
Intervene…its your job…he’s 14…
Get him into a treatment facility or into a outpatient program n do drug test at home regularly to make sure not using
Uh get him into a rehab center ASAP. He’s 14. He doesn’t have a choice In the matter. And get the police involved, he’s getting it from someone.
New friends and church
Hope the best for your son
1 Get him in therapy to figure out why. 2 Take away everything and possibly change schools or send him away to boarding school. You need to cut him off socially until he can make new friends. Take his door. Do room checks. Basically, give him the consequences that he would get if he was caught with it. Explain it that way. Possession would be so many days in jail so you have that many days on house arrest with a fine you need to work off. He’s too young to do anything less than drastic.
Open conversation, but I say send him off to a boot camp for kids, better to correct it now before he has some real issues
You need to talk to him…14? I was 14 when i started. Im now 40 and clean…but it took a looong time. This sounds bad but if u can organize him a chat with a group of bad addicts it may help him
Talk to him. Ask him what he wants. If he admits to it and asks for help then find a place where they will treat him. If he denies it and fights you then he’s an addict who might not be ready for help. In that case then you will have to take another approach
Obviously there are other things going on for you to test him in the first place. Figure out that issue and go from there. Rehabisn’t the best option he’s gonna thing you’re throwing him away
Move, that would work the best being hes only 14 and more than likely only has one source
Well… to be honest it’s probably his circle of friends that is the problem if hes doing that kind of stuff at 14. Kids do things like this younger and younger.
As dumb as this sounds, don’t freak out on him because it’ll make it worse. And he could already be addicted… have a heart to heart with him. A serious heart to heart. When i was doing really stupid and dangerous shit as a kid 12-14 that’s what took my mom to get me to stop. Maybe seek some counseling if you believe in that. You’re going to get a lot of shit because “its always the parents fault” but hopefully you dont get that and you get as much advice as you can. Thats so scary forreal. And my prayers are with you mama!
Coming from a terrible teenager, you can’t force him to go to rehab! Is he involved in any extracurricular activities? Try to get him involved in something good and try to keep the lines of communication open.
Demetra Dodd-Kourtis is right he may have not even known there’s was cocaine involved
Talk to him about it and possibly have him talk to someone at an AA meeting who has been through it and understands what he’s going through.
Take him to NA meetings…show him people who have crawled from the depths of hell…take him to jail to see those still there. Take him to the street. Take him and show him the reality of drug use…then get him help because he is trying to fill a void…he is going through shit u dont know…before u lose him id try to find out xxx
Take him to an NA meeting, let him hear their stories and you may actually get some willing to mentor/sponsor him, even if he’s not an addict. They will be willing to talk to him everytime he wants to do something stupid. Addicts in recovery want to help. You help them when you let them help you. Then talk to his dr and get him in therapy now with a therapist who specializes in addicts and teens. Get yourself into al-anon if you need to. And family therapy with him. Talk to his school too. See what they say. He may be skipping or otherwise struggling there. Perhaps you can get a teacher or school counselors to help you keep him on track while he is there.
Anyone saying send your kid away is TOTALLY wrong. I got sent to a “boarding school” at 15 because my mom couldnt handle me and all it did was give me lifelong issues and PTSD. Handle your shit mama, don’t send your kid away. Outpatient treatment at most.
- Beat his ass
- Get him into therapy
- Strip his room of everything but the bare necessities
Send him to a kids drug program residential
Maybe talk honestly about drugs. Something like “no one wants to be an addict, no one chooses that life. It just happens.” Maybe take him to an AA or other similar meeting to hear stories of others and how it affected their lives /how no one thinks it could be them before it eventually is. Also stress SAFETY of using. Kids will experiment if they want to despite what a parent says or does ultimately. Stressing the importance of being safe and not risking your actual life for drugs (using test kits, not indulging in large amounts, not driving if they feel they need to experiment, the ability for them to call for a ride if they need you rather than driving with someone on drugs out of fear of punishment for partying…)
All these people suggesting sending him away or moving away to where he knows nothing is fucking stupid.
Coming from a drug addict at 17. Talk to him, find out why and what’s causing it. BE THERE for him. What makes people go to coke, etc? Encourage him to get better and ignore coke as coping mechanism.
Ask yourself questions to try and narrow down what you think might be the underlying issue since there’s already is one.
And dont delude yourself. Moving may work for a minute…or it could make it worse. Hell find drugs…trust me. He needs to deal with his issues inside…drugs is just the symptom of a deeper issue
Maybe some rehab for teenagers, talk to him find out if he’s experimenting or like seriously doing drugs. Idk that’s a pretty tuff situation. I wish you luck.
Don’t know bout y’all, but if I found out my child were using these drugs I’d take leave off work or quit if need be, watch him 24-7 take the door off his room. Bars on windows. Ain’t no one getting in or out. And realistically I’d probably smack them for being so stupid. I’d find out which friends are doing it and let their parents and the school know. I won’t let this fly, and I won’t hand him off to a rehab center if he’s not going through withdraws.
Therapy maybe rehab depending on how bad it is. In rehab they normally have alot of therapy and differnt ways to cope with issues
Take control. It’s now or never. U are the Mom. U shut shit down… Just like that
Can this person please message me? I’m the one you should talk to!!
I don’t really have any advice for you. I just can’t imagine how you are dealing with this news emotionally and want to say I’m so sorry. I hope you find the help he needs and your mama heart can rest easy. Sending virtual hugs and good vibes your way.
See if an outpatient rehab center is avalible.
Ask Biden. He shares similar parenting experiences
Rehab first and then military school. He needs to be removed from the situation and around people who care about his well being.
Are you sure he marijuana wasn’t laced with cocaine? Deff a possibility. Don’t have much advice, but good luck to you! Just maybe try to make him feel comfortable to open up to you
Wtf has your 14 year old son been allowed to smoke weed to begin with. ? I’d say take a closer look at the parents who raised this child . There’s obviously some issues within the family to start drugs at such a. Young age .
First of all was it legit blood drawn test… was it for cocaine specifically or benzodiazepines or opiods??
If so I wud meg in therapy & rehab ASAP!!! Too many kids dying too young, turns right to HERION cause it cheaper
Some people lace weed with coke. I’d talk to him, there a slight possibility hes not doing it.
Now a days people lace pot with shit maybe it was laced and he didn’t know. Maybe this could be a wake up call to him to stop everything all together.
Show him videos and articles on drug users who lost the battle to drug addiction, talk about how it changes everything and disconnects them from real life, explain how much you care about him and maybe dig to let him talk about it and actively listen with no judgement, think of activities to do to keep him busy.
Depending on how long he’s been doing it, and how much he likes it, he’s probably already addicted. Need to take him to a therapist and they’ll help him, and a recovery center (out patient) because honestly if he ain’t a full blown addict he don’t need rehab. Just some good therapy and support. Also needs to get away from whoever he runs with, that’s the cause of it or it was for me. I’m in recovery right now and trust me, those around you have a huge impact on ya. Dont go crazy on him, he could’ve been laced and didn’t even know, maybe the pot was laced or maybe he just don’t understand the danger of drugs, no need to flip out though, it’ll only make it worse and he will def use again. Wish you the best of luck and praying for your boy.
It could have been laced marijuana just saying it happens a lot
Scared straight program? Do everything in you power to stop this before his life is ruined forever.
You knew he was smoking weed, but didn’t mind stopping that? It could have been laced, your child could have died from an overdose…he is 14! Look into rehab/military school for him and parenting classes for yourself.
As a former teenage coke and meth addict (still an addict but ive been clean 5 years) get him help NOW rehab if you can. If he tested positive hed done it within 3 days of that test. You need to get him help asap.
I wouldn’t be so fast to think he’s actually doing coke . It’s not uncommon to get weed that is laced unknowingly. I’d talk to him about the information you have , and try to get him to be open and honest about the situation.
Straight to a dr that specializes in drug addiction. The coke absolutely could have been in the weed. Regular drs are not qualified to treat drug addiction. If he is uses daily, if only weed he has an addiction. This is no time to be his friend, tough love needs to prevail if you hope to save him.
He has to want to himself
Rehab. I work at one and many take teens as young as 14. Get him help before it gets out of control and he moves onto heroin. We have an epidemic here. This isn’t something you can ignore!
Get him into treatment !!! Don’t wait !! Rehab and counseling !! Know first hand …son started at 15 with weed and it just escalated from there , he’s 25 now and still fighting for his sobriety !! Wish I had known sooner !!
That’s a hard one.i guess u could tell him it not good.why did he start ??
Get help for him ASAP.
I would talk with your doctor and have more extensive tests done. It is possible that he got laced weed, or it could be from some over the counter meds. I had a friend that lost her job over some cold and flu medicine. Once they did More testing they found it to VERY small traces and were able to track it down.
If it were me, I would sit down and have a flat out heart to heart with him. Ask him if he did it, if so why did he it, how did he get it, and what he thinks y’all can do to fix the problem. Show him proof of what drugs lead to in life. Take him to the police department and they will speak with him and can even show him more proof of the damage it can cause. If he won’t speak with you about it, then it is a good chance he knew he was doing it. So rehad would probably be the best bet. But make sure it is a center that will not let him have contact with “friends” and only visits from people you have placed on the list. Good luck to you and your son. Very scary…
Whoaaaaaa cocaine? 14!!! I’m sorry! I really dont have anything i can really say but therapy? Omgg😰
They can be mentally addictive but not physically yet. Need to get him into counseling. Mentally will lead to the other. Went through this with my son. My heart aches for you
Before just assuming anything, talk to him, it’s not uncommon for weed to end up laced with things. I know people that their weed was laced with fentanyl and ended up in the hospital from an OD.
Also if he did do it, it would have been in the past 3 days, but don’t badger him because if he is using he will be flighty and his mental state will be unstable when under pressure.
Rehab and counseling
Rehab. That is very young to be doing hard drugs. Next will be meth or heroin/fet. He needs help
Rehab intervention now.
Give him the help now since he is so young!! Sending prayers your way! And it’s not your fault, there’s a number of possible ways he ended up with it in his system, laced weed or maybe a friend had it…
Get him help now, if not he’s going to be doing Stronger drugs!!
No more social media💙
Contact your local sheriff’s office explain what’s going on and ask if you can get a tour of the jail so that he can see what he’s heading to.!!!
Take him to a rehab facility or a mental health clinic they’ll help him get off it and go through what comes after
I’m not going be ashamed to said this…I’ve been stayed sober 6 year now from cocaine…honestly its hardest to quit that crap trust me take him to rehab that will help him back on right path but I would see into see if its weed begin laced also have heart to heart an sit down have talk to him though
It’s his choice of friends and his choice of activities, its natural to want to either party and hang out or be aport of the other crowd that doesn’t do drugs and does school dances and stuff . At this point it’s time to help him with his down time by taking over the management of his time . He should have planned activities to be able to leave the house and it should be adult supervised when hes not in your direct care . Let him know it’s not acceptable and he is your responsibility and you don’t plan to slack on that. Keep him busy and away from friends that have to much free time .
BEAT HIS ASS!!! Come on now parents, the more your child gets away with the more they will try to get away with. If you know he is constantly smoking weed an not saying/doing Whooping his ass, then he will see/try whatever he wants because “What’s mom going to do talk to me, be mad an yell,”
Where in the world did he get it and where did he get the money? I would put him in a treatment physicality not because before the addiction really takes control.
He needs to switch circles of friends. I’m sure he’s not doing it alone.
So…drugs are usually used as a coping mechanism…underlying issues…just think as adults when we are stressed
" oh I need a drink"…theres a reason he started weed in the first place…self medicating…DO NOT THINK ALL HE NEEDS IS LOVE…HE NEEDS HELP FOR WHAT GOT HIM TO TRY COKE N WEED IN THE FIRST PLACE…whethere self esteem…issues at school/ home…no judgement…i work with kiddos…just letting you know what I see…
professional help is key as well as good support system. For you and for son…
So scary and difficult for y’all, I’m so sorry. I’ve seen some good and compassionate advice for your family and nothing extra, I just want to say I will be hoping for the best outcome for your family.
Step 1. Figure out how bad his drug use really is. Step 2. Find his source and cut it off.
Step 3. Consequences. There need to be consequences for his drug use, whether his cocaine use was intentional or not. If it were me, his phone would be gone. Social media. Electronics. Everything. He would be immediately coming home from school everyday. His person and backpack get searched as soon as he gets in the car. No more extracurriculars. No parties. No sleepovers. No friends over. Take his bedroom door off the hinges. Strip everything out of his room that is not a necessity. If he complains or throws a fit, explain that if this is what he’s going to choose to do, then this is the consequence. He needs to be held responsible for his actions NOW, BEFORE it’s too late. At some point, if he’s caught by law enforcement, jail will be worse than what you could ever do to him at home. If peer pressure is really the root of the problem, I’d pull him from school and homeschool him. If he were mine, I’d also make it clear that if I ever catch him with any kind of drugs, I will march him to the police department myself to turn him in. As many times as it takes. Zero tolerance is his new motto. You need to turn his world upside down enough for him to realize that sobriety is the “easy” option. He also is going to need counseling and depending on the extent of drug use, possibly rehab. I’d be looking specifically for someone with an experienced track record with juveniles. This is a road you don’t ever want to have to repeat later on down the road. The more thorough and consistent you are, the better.
Talk to him. Tell him he can tell you the truth and you guys can fix this. Let him know the repercussions of such a dangerous drunk, especially in this day and age. Be up his ass 24/7 if necessary.
Rehab, group counseling, individual counseling, take him to see the drugs hoods in your local area, you should go to Alanon meetings so you know how to deal with this.
He has to want help for him to actually get it. But rehab is a good start
Please get him help now before its to late…my brother started young and now 33 and homeless because he wants to get high and steal from us…
“I knew he was smoking weed” and you let it continue??? Parent of the year
As a recovering addict I would highly recommend some early intervention via drug treatment. He will need some type of it; inpatient or intensive outpatient would be likely be best, just to really start digging into it. He’s at the age where it got really serious for me and I ended up in a bad place for a lot of years
Prayers for you momma that you can nip this in the butt and get him on the straight and narrow. I have a 14 year old and I do not know where I would go with this knowledge.
Rehab. Have a talk. Was it an experiment? Or is it regular?
Therapy, and addiction services will help you or lead you in the right direction, good luck to you and your son on this journey.
Ok first talk to him, he might not even know. You know how many teens get laced weed and have absolutley no idea? Don’t just assume right away that he is intentionally doing coke. Then go from there
Rehab before it gets worse.
He needs help.
Drug use is younger kids can be a sign of self medication for depression or anxiety.
He needs put into a detox program… getting off drugs for adults is difficult. For kids it can be impossible. Addiction is a real medical issue and he could die from detoxing. (This is a real medical issue and you guys need real medical help).
Next step is a full physical and mental evaluation to find out A) if any damages were done and B ) what undiagnosed mental issues are going on. You have to know what you are working with.
'Different types of psychoactive substances may be used for various reasons when self-medicating. Examples include:
Stimulant drugs like cocaine, methamphetamine, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, or ADHD, medications (Adderall, Ritalin, Vyvanse): to increase focus, attention, and energy levels, as well as for combating depression and increasing pleasure’
He could be depressed, have adah, a hyperactive disorder, or be dealing with anxiety. A medical professional skilled in these areas is definitely needed. People with ADHD also might have treatment resistant depression, and it can be hard to figure out which issues are caused by which problem. You need to go to a child psychologist. Most treatment programs will point you in the right direction.
- Rehab. Immediately. Talk to his pediatrician about the right way forward.
- Move. Switch him to a different school. Get him away from the people who are going to suck him back down as soon as he pulls himself out.
Rehab. Now. Cut off his “luxuries” like cell phone, computer, social media, and get him help before CPS gets involved.
May the weed he smoking is laced with coke I agree he needs to go to rehab clearly he need help good luck I hope things get better