Should couples have locks on their phones?

is it okay to have a lock on ur phone? me and my hubby have been together 8 years have 3 kids and he has had a lock on his phone since we got together. sometimes he will take it off and when I look at his phone I always find bad things when I confront him about it he blames it on me! i recently found a message from this girl dated to last year she had been sending him nudes and talking very inappropriate to him! and he was going along with her. he even went as far as telling her he dont love me he is just with me because of our kids! when i asked him about it he said he only said those things bcause we had been fighting? I’m not sure weather to believe him or leave him? need opinions?

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I would leave him if he’s doing that. Fighting or not no husband should ever feel like it’s ok to text another woman.

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What would YOU say to someone else who asked you this question?

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A lock on the phone is fine the other stuff he needs to go.

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#BOYBYE if he cant respect you, and hes already been a dirty thing I would just say bye. Theres no point in trying to fix someone who clearly dont wanna be fixed.

leave. if this was my husband, I wouldn’t think twice. nobody deserves to be treated like thst.

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There’s no trust ,leave and be happy enough to be with someone that you dont have a feeling to check their phone.

You deserve so much better than that

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I keep a lock on mine to keep kids out of it but my boyfriend doesn’t have one on his.

I have a boyfriend and have a lock on my phone

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Locks on the phone aren’t a problem. Lying and cheating are. I agree with Cheyenne Medina fighting or not you stay faithful to your boo! :100:

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If I found nudes of another woman that would be the end of the relationship

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Girl. You do not deserve that crap. Leave. It doesn’t get better. It will continue to progress. And if he is blaming you for his wrong doing… that’s just another huge red flag.

Pm me I have a story very similar to yours

Throw the whole man in the trash.

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Is this the type of man you would want your kids dating/marrying ? You deserve better as well!

Ask God, not anyone else

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If there is no trust, it’s not a healthy relationship.

Your better off by yourself. Don’t need the stress of always thinking he’s lying or the need to go through his phone.

You gotta ask and yet you already know the answer … no one deserves that bs it’s hard … it’s gonna suck for a bit but it’ll be worth it in the long run … gotta go

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Life’s to short sweet find a man that will LOVE you!!!

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I have a lock on my phone but my husband knows the passcode. Time to move on. Isnt healthy to stay with someone like that for the kids.

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Leave he’s only telling you he didn’t mean it because you’re all he has and she won’t get with him probably.

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I would be irate! Talking is one thing but to send nudes!! Hell no. I would definetly leave. Sorry you’re going thru this

Is this even a question or do you want us to decide for you?

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I have a story very similar to this

My ex husband would do things similar to this when I would make him mad. Leave. It doesn’t get better. They just learn to hide it better.

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I’d get outta there quick!! If he’s done it once and gotten away with it, he will continue to do so. Don’t tolerate that kind of disrespect! You deserve so much better!

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I haven’t ever had a lock on my phone that my husband couldn’t get into in the 9 years we’ve been married. Neither has he. If there’s nothing to hide, there shouldn’t be a lock. Period. Don’t be naive.

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Domt believe when ur in a REAL relationship, guys or men dont say that , hes playing games , move on !!

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Leave. In my experience, run!!!

He take you for an idiot smh and that alone should get him put out the house!! Also you can check his phone rather he like it or not having secrets is not an option in marriage!

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Leave and run fast. Life is to short to waste it on lying unfaithful people. He won’t change they never do. You have kids that are looking up to you they don’t need to be apart of an unhappy/unhealthy relationship.

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We have a lock on our phones just in case we loose our phones. But we know each other passcode. Gilr you deserve better

Leave. Even if I was fighting with my husband, I would never be taking to another man inappropriately because of that. That is a pathetic excuse.

Both me & my husband have locked phones but we know each other’s codes if we ever wanted to look.

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I would say “good bye”.

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Yes. But know eachothers passwords.

See an attorney (quietly) you need to get good advice with this person. In my view.

Leave him! Hes a cheater

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My husband does the same things and probably worse. I’m getting a divorce.

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F that!!! Been there, never again!! Don’t waste ur time !

Been there. He is cheating. Even if he hasnt physically he is by engaging in the texts.

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Let me ask you this…

Have you ever done this to him.

Do you feel like you deserve to be disrespected like that?

Answer no? Then leave. You deserve the most amount of love and why would you stay with someone who doesn’t deserve or appreciate you. You’re better off and you won’t find your actual ever after staying with that joker.

Leave. Why let yourself be treated this way?

Definitely leave. It only gets worse. I’m sorry.

The lock isn’t the issue here

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Run… don’t walk. My hubby has a lock but is required to by his work. But I know the password and have full access

I have mine locked… he has he’s. He’s old phone is locked too. Why… we have kids who think it’s ok to take our phones and play games or be on YouTube endlessly and then it’s a fight to get it back. So I know he’s. He knows mine. But the kids don’t know either.

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Your husband is trash and doesn’t deserve you as a wife. He doesn’t appreciate you and it diesn’t seem like he ever did. Free yourself. LEAVE. You will find better and even if you don’t… it might be better ti be single

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Lock on the phone is not the issue here !
Your relationship is the problem. If he cared about his kids he’d show their mother more respect.

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No way. You don’t talk to someone when you are fighting or not. And no nice pics. He’s a wanna be playa

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Honey, weither hes lying or not… Proof is proof. He isn’t faithful to you. Leave him and take those babies. My husband and I fight too, but he knows dammmnnn well if he did that, all he would see is mine and our kids backs, walking away.

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We have locks to keep kids off. But we have each others passwords

Because men (And women) can’t be faithful is the reason why you see a lot of single moms and a lot of single men because the women leave the men (or vice versa) because of the other partner being unfaithful, but then wonder why their single? If you want to be with several different then stay single and stick to dating so no one gets hurt because you’re not ready for a fully committed relationship. This is heartbreaking especially when kids are involved. Don’t have kids and be in a relationship if that’s not what you want period.

Not ok. Me and my husband know each other’s passwords and can check at anytime but we have no reason to doubt each other. If you are finding stuff that is not ok.

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It would be opened and stay that way or I would be GONE

Just be happy with your kids and let it be until you ready to do things on your own.

Leave him. You deserve better and honey. I’ve been with my husband 30 plus years only married 17 never locked our phones. I trust him and he trusts me. We even went on separate vacations when didn’t have any one to keep our audtic son.

Phone lock has nothing to do with your situation. I have my phone locked for security reasons, not my husband. You have trust issues and apparently your husband is cheating on you in some sort. I wouldn’t stay in a marriage like that, you need to figure out if that is something you are willing to put up with.

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Leave. Me and mine both have locks on our phones bc of our kids. But we both have each other’s passcodes. And we use each other’s phones whenever we feel like it. No relationship should have secrets.

Your happiness shld matter… U will just hold it in your mind till u explode… Then you’ll leave

Leave him or leave his phone alone

Only you can make the decision to stay or go. Do what’s best for you.

Throw the man away. No matter how mad you are, your wife is still your wife and you have respect for her.

Lmao. Uh, get outta there.

You shouldnt be looking threw his phone. Even if it was unlocked.

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Been there done that- LEAVE … RUN…

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You already know. No one locks their phone if they have nothing to hide. No one.

Leave. Your kids don’t need to be in a negative environment and if he’s tellin her that, then he probably doesn’t. A “fight” doesn’t make a good partner cheat. He’s obviously not a good partner. But quit snooping. With your lack of trust, y’all shoulda split up a long time ago.

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Get out of dodge. Bye bye baby

It is time to move on for both you and your kids.

Been through something similar…its cheating in my book

No reason for anyone to lock their phone unless they are doing something wrong or they work for FBI or CIA. Lol

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There’s a passwordword on both our phones, BUT* we know each other’s passwords and can look whenever. The passwords are only on there for the kids. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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He needs help from a counselor.

You need opinions on this? Really? Leave him. He’s a total snake.

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Lock on phone…no biggy. I have one, my man does to. BUT we will unlock it for the other. Or we do it ourselves (we have each other’s passwords lol).
So locked phone…meh.
But inappropriate messages and pics when the relationship doesn’t fly that way…boy bye. Period.
If you don’t have trust. You have nothing🤷

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Leave my husband and I know each others lock codes. I can access it at anytime and he can access mine. No need to keep secrets and nothing ever like that would we find RUN as fast as you can

I would leave for sure. Your wasting your time with him. If you found that just imagine what you haven’t found!!!

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Leave, once that starts it usually doesn’t stop.

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Been with mine for 18 years 3 children together 3 months ago he started staying out late a girls name & number in his phone got mad cuz I looked at his phone, then started staying out all night lying wouldn’t answer his phone, recently brought said girl to our home! LEAVE b4 it gets bad like mine did. Don’t let your heart get broken like mine is. I have nothing, no family to turn to. I quit my job last year bc he wanted me at home with the kids. Now i have no money nothing. Please listen and don’t end up like me

It’s a perfectly painted picture of what you should do.

If he hasn’t stopped since the first time you found something then unfortunately he isn’t going to stop because he believes he will continue to get away with it he believes that he can keep doing what he’s been doing because he thinks you won’t do anything about it he’s convinced that no matter what he does you will always be there that you won’t leave it’s not easy to leave someone you’ve been with for that long but you and your kids deserve so much better than that he needs to understand and realise that your not a door mat that your not going to continue to let him walk all over you you are a person and you matter your not just his wife and your not just the mother of yours and his children you are also a person and you deserve to be treated alot better than the way he has treated you and if he wants to continue to put your relationship in jeopardy just remember that he is the one who is missing out he is the one who will be losing everything not you and not your kids

If you feel the need to look, you’re already in trouble

Gut feelings.
That’s cheating weather they are being physical or not.
It is a toxic relationship and it will be worst for your children if you stay with him,Cleary one or both parties are not happy

Leave . You deserve better

Oh hell no. Tell him goodbye!

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Leave him. He doesn’t love you if he can cheat on you

When ppl show you who they are believe them . He is not interested in you any more. If you stay & they’re no consequences you’ve given him permission.

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Girl. If you found nudes and him saying he doesn’t love you to the nude sending woman, he doesn’t love you & he’s BEEN cheating. You might as well assume it’s been the whole 8 years. Locks or no locks that guy is cheating. If you’re cool with that, then keep living your life like it is. If you object to him cheating, you need to get in touch with a lawyer and move on.

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Leave! As a woman who’s just now going through the breakup after I was cheated on, love yourself enough to walk away from toxic situations. If there’s one conversation theres probably 1000 more. Also Google Activity doesn’t lie so if ya really wanna learn about him go through his web activity.

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He was telling her the truth. Sounds like he is using you. You allowing it is just giving him the ok to keep doing it.

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:running_woman:t3::running_woman:t3::running_woman:t3::running_woman:t3::running_woman:t3:

If y’all aren’t up to some counseling, may I suggest “Boy, bye! :v:t2:”?

Leave. It only gets worse.

Take her nudes and post them online. Teach her not to be sending another woman’s man nude pics. Get her number and tell her you did it too. I’d probably go as far as to tell my man I got herpes - just to scare him- if he has cheated and you know for sure. I’m evil though. I’d probably burn his clothes too.

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He sounds like a narcissist. They will try to blame you when they get caught. You did nothing wrong you have every right to go through his phone if you feel there is a reason and apparently you were right. He’s not going to stop and let you leave him he’s probably already cheated or he’s going to.

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What advice would you give your daughter if it was happening to her ?

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Id kick his sorry cheating butt out

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If you did that would it be ok ? Try that on him . Your turn. Leave the cheater