If you have one school-age child and an infant and you need a sitter, so you don’t lose your good job. Both parents work dad makes 3x your pay. You have your own bills and pay all your children’s needs, and you’re basically broke. The mother-in-law was watching the baby, and charging 200 a month sounds great, right? However, mom could only afford a hundred after paying for her, and her kids need Dad making twice as much has not contributed a dollar but gets upset that you can’t pay his mom $200. Then gets mad if you mention anything relating to his mother( ie, she has a rash she didn’t listen to when I said she needs to be changed a lot or diapers burn her bum, or your mom has left the bottle upside down dirty on the counter and is attracted ants yet again or he b****** that you for working later and that’s because his mom showed up late every single morning) has a fit because you told him he’s not stepping up then tells his mother (because you express your feeling of lack of help and lack of being a father, and was trying to go on trip to see great grandma before she passes) she’s not paying you(wasnt 1st of month) so mother-in-law quits watching child. Now, the mother is about to lose her job, which pays for the children’s insurance and benifits Ian has a better job but not as good pay. Who should be paying for childcare I say 50/50 he says I should pay it all, so I looked into daycare, and it’s $200 a week(800$ a month) in my area and. I deff can’t afford that! he refuses to help so I can keep
Are you together? I dont understand…
If your not together is there a CO that goes over Chad care expenses???
It should be 50/50 for childcare. Always.
If hes not contributing at all then he should be paying the whole $200. If not, he should at least be paying half. Hes the father and he has responsibilities.
ALL money gets puts in the pot. Bills paid. That includes kid(s)’ expenses like day care, diapers, school fees etc
Then extra is discussed. What’s going in savings…who wants what…what can be afforded…
Saved for a bigger item later? Etc
None of this his pay, her pay bullshit.
It’s ALL BOTH y’all’s pay checks. Just saying.🤷
Does he pay court ordered child support? If he does your only option is to take him back for modification. If he doesn’t…take him to court for support and include the price of outside daycare and not his mother.
I’m confused by this run on sentence.
1.are you together or not
2. stop making the guy be the go between, if you have issues you and the mother/grandma need to sit down and hash it out between the 2 of you like adults
Child support is a real thing…file for it. The courts will also stipulate 50/50 on things like childcare, insurance and whatever else.
Look into programs for single moms in your area that will help cover child care expenses. Go through a legitimate facility where your baby wont have butt rash from sitting in a wet diaper for hours. Then go to court and file for child support even if you are living together. If you’re married then forget everything I just said, but from the sound of it theres no way in hell yall are married if he cant even help with his own children.
Does he pay child support if yes this is one of the things it goes towards
I think I would have an easier time reading Latin…
Sound like he dont want y 5o work controlling much I get out
I think they are together but he pays bills and she pays some. Well the child is both yalls so each of you pay $100.
Take him to court for child support.
Well if your not together get him for child support.
It sounds like you guys are together and he doesn’t pay anything at all. That’s not how a relationship works. A relationship is a partnership and you each help take care of everything TOGETHER. Even if you’re not together he should still help. He needs to help pay for the kids he helped make🤦🏼♀️it’s that simple. I couldn’t be with someone like that🤷🏼♀️
Wow stay at home then and see what he pays for some men
Show him a print out of how much a month he’d be paying in child support with his income 🤷 tell him he can do one or the other.
If he refuses to pay, take his ass to court. In some states, the father actually has to pay for the entire childcare, but in MOST cases, dad has to pay 50/50.
If your still with him your stupid leave!! And file for child support immediately either way!! Smh:woman_facepalming:
I stopped reading 1/3rd in
If you’re both working, you are both responsible for the cost of childcare.
If you are separated, by law, he has to pay half of medical AND childcare outside of child support. It works the same if you are together.
I’m gonna say it incase anyone before me hasn’t🙄…
Take his ass to court
Take it to court half his kid half his responsibility
Take him to court for child support
This “man” is a piece of shit.
Everything should be 50/50 with a child. There is no; I pay half or you do it all. You had sex and your responsibility is a child. If he pays child support then call the child support department and ask if they would be able to arrange payments that help with child care. If you are together then he is a selfish child. Bills are 50/50 unless you have a seperate phone bill or something that is just yours to pay like going to the gym. If he’s running to he’s mum when you express that he should be helping you with the cost/bills then you have a man who acts like a child.
Let me correct this for you.
Should parents who are not together each pay half on childcare? Also if one parent is supplying insurance should the other parent cover more of the childcare expense? Also should I allow a woman (happens to be the grandmother) watch my child even though she has proven not up to my standards of cleanliness as well as never present at the agreed time? Can I included childcare expenses in my child support order?
All that other mess doesn’t matter.
You might as well leave & hit him for child support…
If he’s complaining about helping you on half with all of yalls kids needs, tell him well congratulations you can pay the whole damn thing now… because what your asking him vs. what CS will take from him is a lot more.
Child support is a good place to start.
He makes 3 times mom he should pay the whole damn thing. Shoot.
Go to court and have it court ordered that he pays half.
Take his ass to court!
He should be paying, if he won’t voluntarily then take him to court. Whatever the % of support for each parent is is how they split childcare. My ex is supposed to pay 74% of childcare costs but we split 50/50. He can work without having to arrange and manage childcare so it’s just ridiculous that he can’t pay 1/2. Any court will order he pays at least half.
If you are with a man and you are struggling and he can make it so you don’t struggle but won’t, that is a huge problem.
Get child support. He will wish he paid gma for baby sitting
This post is extremely confusing. If you’re together and married, it should fall on both parents.
He will have to pay if you take him to court. I couldn’t tell if you guys live together or are together or what but if you are together you need to split up and take him to court. If you are not together, you need to take him to court. It’s his obligation to pay half of not all of the childcare.
This is a complicated issue…
So here’s a few questions
- Are you guys together? Separated? Divorced?
- Is this child both yours and his? Just yours and he’s stepdad?
- Before you started working…what was the financial arrangement?
Finances are often a huge struggle for couples to agree on. And while you gave information, there’s not enough relevant info to say whose in the right and whose in the wrong. Its really not so cut and dried as “he would pay more in child support”
You can wish it is but its not.
I stay home because if i was working my entire check would go to childcare…at that…its just not worth it.
Regardless, both parents are responsible for their childs daycare, medical care etc!
Him and his mom sound like ding dongs. For sure child support. Just the sound of child support might be the fire under his ass he needs. A lot of men dread that word, but it’s unfair that one parent has to pay all the expenses. It didn’t take one person to make a child
Go after him and have the court make him pay for the child support
Tell him to pony up or you’re going to court
Send him back to mommy and take him to court
In New York child care is different than child support and usually gets split pro rata.
Father should definitely be paying for half. Take him to court.
50/50 whether you’re together or not!!
He should pay of he can ! It his kid too ergo his responsibility
My husband usually pays all finances I’ve been back to work for a year and last month was the first time he actually accepted any money from me
Why are you paying the childs grandparent to look after her grandchild!? If family want to be paid to look after your own theres something wrong with you. The joy of being able to spend time with these jewels should be payment enough
Yes. I think both parents are responsible for what your child or children need. Honestly everything should be 50/50.
So what is child support for? Go to court and let the judge decide
He should be responsible for at least half of child care
I have watched my grandkids and great grandkids. I never charged.
If it’s his child he should pay half. And it’s a shame that his mother even charged you if it’s her grandchild
Explain what you want from him give him the option to talk it out and figure it out between y’all and if her doesn’t tell him you’ll see him in court then.
Get child support and court ordered 50/50 day care costs. Hopefully you all aren’t together because holy heck I’d never allow that nonsense.
that’s what i was gonna ask,if they were togther
Go after him for child support he will notice he should of helped after he gets the paperwork
You’ve got to be careful asking for child support nowadays. The court seems to be trying to stick it to feminists by favoring men in custody or child support cases. I’ve seen it too many times. He may get custody and ask for child support from you. My sister was a stay at home mom for 10 years. Her husband left her for another woman and dropped her and the 4 kids off at my mom’s. 4 days later, her 2 month old baby died of SIDS while with a babysitter. She begged and begged him for help financially until she got on her feet and he wouldn’t lift a finger. She was living in a car with 3 children ages 8, 6, and 2. Then she gets a job and house and files for child support. He got pissed and threatened her, she got a restraining order and he went and petitioned for custody to get back at her… And won! The judge said it was because he was only slightly more stable than she was. He was living with a girlfriend at HER house and my sister had her OWN place. Complete bull! You HAVE to be careful!!
Its called court order to make him pay!
Take him to court that is ridiculous.
What is he spending his money on?? Bills, food,cars,or is he just having good time. If that’s the case get rid of him you don’t need to support him . Tell mil you will give her your 100. collect the other from her son
Go to court it’s sucks but if his not willing to help you than you need to do something about it because it’s not fair at all for you. He needs to step up as your kids father as well not just you.
Take him tp court for child support. It should be 50/50.
Go to court. He should pay child support and 50/50 childcare
What the hell kind of marriage is this ??
Better off getting a divorce and half of everything which you are not getting now.
This is not a man but a selfish, disrespectful, sperm donor who only cares about his own needs and no one else.
Mommy boy. Let him go live with his idiot mother. She deserves him
First if I would never charge to watch my grandkids and second dad should help with everything it’s a partnership not a single relationship if your doing it alone then why oh why do you stay
I don’t believe in 50/50 because if you’re in the same household then that’s a household bill. That should be budgeted into the household expenses. However, if he’s not helping now he won’t help in the future. Leave and get court ordered GARNISHED for his check and move on. It will be hard but 1st you will make it. I promise you that AND it’s better to do by yourself than to have some half ass man there taking up space and using your toilet paper! Good luck
Go around them both and call the attorney general’s office for help. If he makes 3x much… well its his child too.
I hope you’re not with him.
Yes!!! Both parents should be responsible for support
Both parents should be responsible for taking care of the child
If I was with him I’d be saying buh bye jerk! And sticking him with child support and finding a subsidy or scholarship for daycar/childcare usually run thru headstart programs. I’d document everything texts,times with his “mother”, issues you’ve had with getting to work over his lack of wanting to parent. I’d definitely be getting the help now so I could afford the neccessary things my kids needed his feelings wouldn’t matter especially with how shitty he sounds.
Deadbeat dad leave him
Dad needs to help with child care. Take him to court if u need to! If he doesn’t help with out a court order, then he has chosen.
Leave his sorry a$$ and collect child support and make it that he also needs to pay for health insurance and childcare. See how his cheap a$$ likes that.
Y’all a couple? Or divorced because sounds a bit much. If separated go court child maintenance. If together he doesn’t seem to be doing what a husband and father should be doing at all
Does he pay child support???
He needs to be paying child support. He needs to be contributing to the cost of child care.
He should help pay childcare AND be giving you child support. Stand your ground mama! This is NOT fair to you.
Sounds like a good time to set a court date…
If you aren’t together, it’s time to go to court and make him pay up.
That literally makes no sense why he wouldn’t split the cost… he can’t bare to give his own mom 100 a month to watch his own kid? What the fuck
Call child support in your area! They will put a stop to him not paying real quick!
What in the world? This is NOT normal. If you are together- then stay home and watch the kids yourself and see how he likes it. If you are not- take him to court and get him to pay childcare and child support.
Check to see what child care assistance (besides him) are in your area.
Regardless of if y’all are together or nah he needs to be helping. They’re his kids too!
Child support … and apply at 4cs they can help with child care !! Sorry your dealing with this !! I’d say stay out of the court system unless it’s the last option! No one wants a judge determine their families out come
Go to court. They will split everything and make him still pay child support.
Leave him and take him to court and get an order requiring him to pay. What a complete arsehole!! How have you not already left him!!??
Those are his kids too and he should be helping! Guys like that make me sick! If y’all aren’t together apply for child support but good luck there because even though mines is court ordered I still don’t receive a dime!
Also, why would a grandmother charge to watch their OWN grandchild?!
I wouldn’t ever charge my kids to watch their babies
Those are his kids too. He pays his share. Where is the child support you should be getting? Call a lawyer, there are many that will help, free.
Yes! That shouldn’t even be a question.
I pay for mine don’t se why he isn’t
I’m so confused by this question if they are a “couple” because this shouldn’t even be an issue.
Dad should definitely be paying for Childs insurance. If there is no court order…get one. Include child care or at least half. Go to legal aid if necessary. Free lawyer. Good luck🍀
It amazes me how these boys (and I don’t care how old they are, you don’t take care of your kids youre a boy not a man) dont mind making them but won’t take care of them. SMH
Keep the kids get rid of him… Sorry but he’s a selfish bastard, there his kids he needs to help or move out and pay child support, he sounds awful and the mother in law sounds just as bad xx
P.s sorry you’ve got to deal with 4 kids and not just your 2 babies xxx
He should be paying his mother and helping with the kids. I don’t understand why his mother is charging you at all if she knows he isn’t helping you!? I’d kick my own son’s ass and then make him pay me and for my grandkids! I’d cut the drama and hire an attorney with an income tax check and file child support and custody on him. You need to file for custody, as children are viewed as property and he can take them whenever he wants unless a court order agreement states who has primary custody… Never something worth risking in my opinion because some parents can get nasty when they are mad. Get an attorney, as any Child Support Division will screw the kids and they are like dealing with ghetto/trashy juveniles with absolulty no common sense. An attorney makes it quick and simple, fyi you can seek child care support as well where he has to pay half of the childcare expenses. At that point, his mother can choose to still watch them and see HER grandchildren or you can take that money and put them in a daycare. Eitherway, you will at least have an option and help! He sounds like a loser by the way!