wth thts be a clear no ild day i want a relationship with him Nd u if cant accept one child u dont get know rest
This isn’t about your feelings.
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If they don’t want me they don’t want my children. Absolutely would not allow my children around them without me. You have no ideal how they are being treated or what they are putting in there heads to cause you problems. Also leaving your daughter out is not right to her even if she isn’t blood. If his son wants a relationship with his siblings he would come to my home period. Good luck and God bless.
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Absolutely not if he wants to see his siblings he can come to your house end of story
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Any place I am not welcome, my children are not welcome! Periodt
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Ok let’s be honest if this was a family member of his I get it. But to not let the siblings have a bond because the ex wife and kid don’t want you and your eldest there isn’t the end of the world. When your kid grows up and finds out that you wouldn’t allow him to go over there because you weren’t welcome but he was isn’t gonna sit right with him. But I do believe a compromise of meeting in a public place would be ideal
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You’re wrong. He doesn’t have to allow anyone over that he doesn’t want. But to not allow your kids to know their older sibling is just you hurting them if that chance. You don’t know what he went through or heard from his mom.
No way are your children welcomed but you are not. Don’t like me don’t get to like my children. Plus they are not hers. She has no need to have your children over there. Publix places work just as well. Where you are welcomed
My children don’t go anywhere I’m not wecome!
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No me no kids
It’s called parental alienation- font risk it
If he really wants a relwith his siblings then he can come to his dad’s house. You set the limits for your children not him
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Nope. I wouldn’t either.
Your daughter isn’t his sister. Yall got a mixed family. You did it. Accept it and get over it. 12 yrs old is old enough to understand why - assuming it’s being explained by a mature adult. You aren’t it.
I wouldn’t let my kids go to someone’s house where I’m not wanted let alone liked. Those aren’t her kids, or blood for that matter, I wouldn’t trust her after being this childish all these years.
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If I’m reading this correctly, you’ve been with this man 8 years?? Yet you’re not allowed over the sister in laws. Your step son doesn’t want anything to do with his step sister and step mom. That’s a little crazy in my opinion that is it still that way for you after that long. Definitely sounds like the ex has a lot to do with what is allowed or not. And has made her son not want to be around.
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Its his kid you should try to do whatever you can to let them have a relationship. However I know its hard with you not being allowed or your daughter. Tho if I am reading it right they are not blood? That doesn’t matter to me but get why nothing with any step family. Let them try and have a relationship. And go from there. Cant be like that always after some time reevaluate. I would say let them see each other not around that family or ex, go to McDonald or something hang out. Let sometime pass maybe six months and than if he wants more to do which he should than do it. If not and only drama try therapy for all of you. And with your daughter on those days they are gone have a daughter mom special day. And hope it all works out. Good luck!
If they want to see them and have a relationship they can come to your house period .
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Nope. Don’t let them. I deal with pretty much the same thing. I do not allow my son to go around the ex.
Let me see if I got this right.
Before marriage everything great with child.
Ex wanted him back ex husband said no and married you.
She got upset child stop coming around
Now his family is close with her and they only want him and the younger ones.
Sounds like a set up.
She may still want him back and turned her son against you.
I would be having a serious talk with your husband his priority should be all of you having a serious talk about family as a whole.
He needs to take his son aside and asked why he turned against you I would say there was things said.
I think the ex still might want a second chance and what better way than to keep you at bay.
Stay calm when talking you will get farther.
I am a step mother I know what it can be like.
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First step, your husband needs to take his ex to court and get a custody agreement. He shouldn’t have to but he NEEDS to fight to see his son.
Also, plan a few park dates, have your husband extend an invite to his son to join. His aunt can bring him and leave if he is uncomfortable.
IMO, your husband needs to build a bond with his son again, and that may need to happen without you. I know what you are feeling, because I have been there too. A bio parent who does nothing but talk badly about the “new” woman, alienating the child from his parent and new siblings. I also had my (late) partners ex tell their daughter (wasn’t my partners bio daughter but he raised her) that our new baby was her sister but my older 3 boys (who my partner raised also) and I were nothing to her.
I do agree this is about all of you, including your older daughter who is being left out…but this is also about more than your feelings. His son IS reaching out, and dad should grab a hold of that. It is a tough situation. Either way you are putting someone on the back burner…
I, personally, would encourage my partner to reconnect with his son, while starting the process to get actual rights within a custody agreement.
Our children ALWAYS come first.
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Nope you’re not wrong. If I’m not welcome my kids won’t be welcome either. Point blank
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Yes and no it sounds like your daughter And him haven’t had a relationship for a long time but as a mom I can understand not wanting my Kid left out I would ask daughter if she wants a relationship if she does say all kids or no kids it’s not about YOU it’s about your children
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Your not in the wrong some of us will never be excepted regardless of how nice we are, your husband should not allow it if you’re not welcome and haven’t done any thing worse😞
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Why didn’t your husband take his ex to court? The kid needs counseling because he’s obviously being used as a pawn and a court ordered visitation and counseling could have easily fixed all of that. The man hasn’t had any time with his son in a few years and he’s done nothing to change that. Sad.
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No. Both kids or no kids. 
your husband is wrong too if he’s allowing this from the ex wife.
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Meet at the park or some place neutral
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I don’t think you’re wrong; it is sad for the older child but it’s the mothers doing that he doesn’t see the siblings, not yours. You should all be welcome and if she acts that way I would be afraid of what she would say in front of my children about me or how she’d try to manipulate them
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Id tell him to come over and just talk about it fine out why he’s upset with yall, and try to work things out, if not have someone you trust take the kids out together every other week or whenever works
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Why didn’t husband get custody visitation of his son? Sounds like she wanted him back and used son against you. And no I wouldn’t feel comfortable letting my husband and children go visiting with her and her family , without you . Sorry . Hubby needs to speak up and say something
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she is right in her feelings. Her husband’s not wrong for saying my WHOLE family or none of us. The ex is just being a petty bitch bc he refused to break up his relationship to take her back and his “family” is allowing it. Is it his sons fault he is in that situation not but he can also speak up and say I want to see my dad. Sorry no child or ex runs my home. My stepson was 15 when he stopped coming over after me being his step mom sense he was 3 you know why? Because he didn’t like my rules and that I called him out for stealing my stuff. Then he started talking shit to my son who was 8 at the time about how im. Nothing but a bitch ect. He is not welcomed in my home until he apologized and sat down and talked to us its been 3 yrs and he only ever wanted his dad bc his dad bought things for our family. He was told he doesn’t get he benefits of our family without being a part of this family so then he never wanted to do anything with his dad. He has has full access to his dad and siblings but choses to blow them off he has a 3.5 yr old sister who hes not allowed to see bc he treats his other 2 like shit and I refuse for my youngest to miss and cry for a brother who don’t care. So no she is not wrong for not allowing toxic family and ex around her kids. And she is not wrong to say hell no is he going to spend time with his ex to see a kid who don’t want to come over. Now if the father was allowed to pick up son and go to a park or somewhere with his child and let them play without step mom thats one thing to meet his siblings but everytime simply bc he don’t like how his family.life is thats too bad. But to think its ok for the ex to say yepnyou see your kid with my toxic ass and your family who don’t accept your wife now way. Maybe you would allow that but I never would I deltnwith toxic shit with my first fiancé like this he refuse to stand up to her and it was one thing that ruined our relationship. So she has the right to say no. Its about boundaries and ppl knowing she is there and not going anywhere.
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If older son says a relationship with younger sibs he needs to come to you. Why would you drop off 2 young children at the home of strangers ??? Ex wife does not sound like a very kind person . Why would you trust them. I would not trust that the older son mom & other relatives would cause no harm !!!
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Be the bigger person and let the children see their family, its their choice, ideally on neutral grounds to start with. Think karma, the last thing you want is your children disowning you.
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You’re not wrong at all. They will certainly say things in front of your children that will cause issues. They will probably brainwash your children if this is how the situation is. It’s not normal for the ex to remain part of the family to the point of living with his sister. Obviously no one respects you.
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Put the children first always! Let them visit!
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i dont think you are wrong . if i wasnt welcome my kids shouild go there
I’m not welcome, neither are my kids
No you are not wrong, my children have older siblings that are not mine but they ask to come and see them and go to park or something as my children have got nothing to do with my partners ex x
Wait, so they want you to allow your children to visit but you and your older child aren’t welcome ever… that’s a no… not to hurt the child but because you don’t know what goes on this that house and cannot protect your children… I wouldn’t even let my kids visit a grandparent or friends house if I wasn’t allowed there regardless of wether or not I planned on showing up.
If they actually give a sht maybe you guys can figure out a way to let the kids play together like parks or lunches etc but from the sounds of it I doubt they’ll do that
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All or nothing I wouldn’t allow it personally.
If you trust your husband to keep the girls safe then let it be! Take it as a break, spend bonding time with your eldest daughter while you still
can!!!
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Your feelings matter, your husband should know that. If the roll was reversed, and your ex wanted you back, and the only way your other child could see there siblings is if you went by yourself with your kids to his house, would your husband mind? I’m sorry but if it was me I would not feel comfortable about the situation.
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If he wants a relationship he needs to visit y’all. Period. After one has been established then maybe they could visit but you can’t send them to visit a stranger without you, related or not.
You are not wrong they are wrong.
Put your children first, as in no do not let them go. If it’s going to be done the right way, in a positive and productive way then it should include all of you. A lot sounds off to me so I definitely wouldn’t let them out of my sight around any of them.
None of that be the bigger person BS, that’s enabling abuse and manipulation. Never take that as advice when someone has and continues to disrespect you. I don’t understand why anyone would encourage you to let your children go without you to people who have mistreated you as if you were wrong for saying no. All that would do is encourage them to continue to behave that way and possibly get worse. No.
I would be the bigger person and I would let my kids go over to see there other siblings just as long as they will be safe and treated correctly. I start off with one visit and go from there. She’s jealous that you are married to her ex she probably thought they might get back together at some point but then you married him and that thought went out the window. Your children will be proud of you for being the bigger person.
What’s the story of her not letting you over, there has to be a good reason why.
I wouldn’t let them go not even your husband you can trust people like her Becareful
Why did a 7 yr old get to be in control and decide if we was or wasn’t coming to your house?
But other than that… it’s not the kids fault. I wouldn’t want to go over there but I can understand your concern w kids going somewhere you aren’t welcome. I would suggest a mutual meeting place. Husband picks up all the kids and does something with them which allows both moms to have some free time.
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No you are not wrong and if he wants a relationship with his siblings he is more than welcome to come to your home or meet you out in a neutral environment. This is all his mother’s doing and maybe your husband should put a stop to it.
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You are NOT WRONG ID SAY HECK NO! My mom always taught me what someone can do to you when they hate you they can do to your child as well out of hate! So be careful
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Yes you are wrong! You are the STEP Mom. That’s something you have to come to terms with. The oldest is still your husbands child! That doesn’t change just because you got with him and popped out more kids!
It’s selfish. You and your daughter don’t NEED to be involved. Let your husband take his kids to see his other kid.
That’s the choice you made by coming into an already somewhat formed family.
I have a step mother that is the same way.
I no longer have a relationship with my dad for that exact reason. I don’t want anything to do with that woman or her children, because SHE made it a point to treat us differently.
Which you probably do. Everyone treats “their real children” better than the ones that were born from another woman.
So let you husband and his children have spend some time together.
Or don’t, just understand that as the oldest turns into an adult and has their own family, they still won’t want you involved, and your husband will miss out on being a grandfather.
He probably won’t even get the chance to be in his grandchildren’s lives. All because you couldn’t mind your own business.
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How bout taking the kids to a outing and let them have fun or have the ex bring your son and everyone meet at a trampoline park or something and just let the kids inter act and the grown ups stay out of it unless there is drama between the kids
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You are not wrong! She does not dictate what YOUR children do! Do not allow this! Never give another woman or person to dictate anything that involves your family. They have no say or power. Do not give it freely out of guilt! And your husband should put his foot down
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So ur kids aunt n uncle say u n daughter arent welcome?? Umm NO!! Ur allowing the ex to control ur families life. Hubby needs to make different arrangements. HELL NO ANY1 would exclude my daughter!! We at team or were not!good luck!
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This just need court ordered visitation the devil will always try to prevail jealousy is a dangerous trait sometimes we look past stuff to keep peace but can turn badly don’t cause your kids trauma if it happens it happens she gone have to explain to him why she was so bitter & adults are jealous of kids so no dont send your kids period stay happy in your marriage hun be blessed:crossed_fingers:
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Girl you are no way wrong!! I wouldn’t trust someone else with my kids! If you & your other child are not welcome, well guess what?? Neither are the rest of us!!
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Can they meet up somewhere else not at anyone’s home? Maybe go for dinner or the movies and spend time with the older brother insted of going to the house where you or you daughter aren’t welcome (so rude by the way to leave her out😡)
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No your not wrong, your a family package, the son should come by you, why make issues between everyone.
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This sounds like a horrible situation with your in laws and his ex all living together …that just seems really toxic and If it was me I don’t think I would want my children around all that…its not even that ur not allowed there…but that ur daughter isn’t welcome…thats just not ok in my book …it would b ok in my eyes if the father took alllll the kids on a play date by himself tho away from all grown ups …but if thats not possible …it is what it is. Its not fair for ur oldest daughter to b left out …I say just focus on ur family
I feel it will just cuase more conflict. Wait until the children are 18 and can decide for themselves. You know that anything that they have to say concerning you will be negative, so why expose your children to that. It should not happen with your husband going over either. He is not supporting you if he does go without you.
No your not wrong, the ex is trying to get your husband back, tell your husband to tell his side if you and your daughter isn’t welcome then the other kids aren’t neither and tell him to stop taking them over there.
I would be getting a court order visitation do that way he will have to go to your house. Also during court I would request counseling for all because it sounds as if his son is brainwashed
Why would you want the ex to influence your children when obviously she has turned other children against you, and your husband should go alone? Lol ahhh no
These exes think they will but they don’t rush it I’m living proof Amen to that
I would allow it. Some relationships don’t need to involve me.
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There is a whole side to this you’re not telling…
These exes think they roll but they don’t they are not shit I’m living proof…
Yeah they need to include you all …that is them just being petty
I wouldn’t be comfortable if the only people not going was me and my my eldest daughter from a previous marriage! I think your husband needs to stand up to his family. If they want a relationship go somewhere neutral like a park.
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It sounds like a mess that won’t get fixed by you stopping the kids from knowing each other.
I would make sure the kids aunt and uncle will be there during the visit. I would struggle with it if only the Ex was going to be with your kids. But if your husband and his family/now your family is there then I would let the kids go.
I would use that time to do something very expensive and fun with my daughter. Couples massages, dinner and a movie, rock climbing.
He can come over or get over it my if im not welcomed them neither are my children.
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If they want to go, if you don’t have any other plans for them, if you’re not concerned for their safety while there and if they are old enough to go without you…
I’d about bet if the kids knew you weren’t welcome they wouldn’t want to go anyway.
Definitely NOT!! “WE” are a package Deal!!!
I would have a hard time wanting my children to go where I am not welcomed or respected. It does sound like for a time your husband also noticed the disrespect and choose to not participate in family events in which you were not invited or made uncomfortable. In laws can be so difficult and refuse to let go of the past. They didn’t need to sever the relationship with the ex but they at least should respect his new family and that he had moved on.
I wouldn’t want my children somewhere im not welcome. And its not right for them to ask your hubby to go to his ex house without you to spend such amount of time with yalls children not hers. The ex wife needs to get over herself and agree to do something in public with yall since you are in this no matter what. This ain’t about who is with the man its about the children getting to know each other. And if she can stop being jealous of you long enough to realize that it will be so much better.
My kids wouldn’t be going anywhere I’m not welcome, If they didn’t like that, that’s not my problem, she should be an adult about it, she said something to the child and he didn’t wanna come over anymore and that’s her problem, she has to live with that, she’s mad the dad didn’t want her when she asked, that shouldn’t involved the child at all. If it wasn’t for her he’d know his siblings.
My children do not go where me or their father isn’t welcome.
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Been through similar issue pm if u want more advice but my approach was if older child wants to know younger half siblings then they need to make effort at our home x
I wouldnt. I would worry about what kind of lies they’re going to tell my younger kids
My kids DO NOT go without me…
If you don’t it’s just another nail in your coffin from their view. It sucks but that’s what happens when bitter moms get into their kids heads.