Stick to your guns. You don’t want to be in a 3 way with the mommy. I would say cut your losses because he seems to unstable and not able to make decisions of his own.
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Privacy is definitely needed, but if he wants to live with his mom as a roommate then that’s completely his decision. However, boundaries are going to need to be set for it to work and those boundaries need to be talked about with all 3 of you present. And the answer to needing to cook and clean for him is a definite no since you don’t live together. I mean sure you CAN cook when you guys are hanging out, but so can he. Also even if you were living together cooking and cleaning shouldn’t be just one person’s duty, you should take turns or divide the chores (that includes EVERYONE who lives there, mom is not excluded if she is a roommate)
Typical mamas boy. Screw that. Get out while you can. She’s being controlling and they don’t even live together. I could only imagine how it’ll be once they live under the same roof. It ain’t worth the headache.
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You are not wrong If she is living with him then she can cook and clean for him !!! Nope that is not your place and you are not his momma!
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Hes a mamas boy and that will never change she will always get what she wants and will eventually cause you to break up…though I feel cooking and cleaning is just basic life skills and is not a gender roll my fiancee and I got really serious really fast and from the very beginning of the relationship we both cooked and cleaned and work as a team to get things done…but we have been living together since the first week of dating
his mom
licks his asshole clean with her tounge it sounds like- ur not his mommy so no u don’t have to cook and clean for him/
Honestly I believed this to be a main cause why my parents divorced was because my dads mom lived with them and she basically ran the house and kept changing everything and my mom didn’t even feel like her house was hers. I LOVE my parents, but it’s time to get off the tit! He needs to let her learn to live on her own. You guys need your own space and privacy in order for it to go in a positive direction.
Girl run. That is a toxic relationship with his mom and it will definitely take a tole on your relationship
Alarm in my head went off when you said I’m not gonna clean or cook till we get married. Wtf ge should still do those things when you get married it’s a partnership
Stick to your guns because his mum sounds like a bloody nightmare!!
My husbands mom got a divorce(husband cheated)and moved in with us and has lived with us for 2 years and we got our own place when we was engaged but lived in my moms as we was dating and his moms room was down the hall and we had our first baby 7 months ago and his mom seen and heard every argument we had but she also looked at the arguments from both of our points of views and helped us tremendously and now she’s remarried and lives with her husband a hour and a half away and when she was with us we still had privacy and even when we was dating we helped each other cook and clean,I didnt only cook and clean for him and he didn’t only do it for me but we helped each other do it both. we also help each other pay bills and we did everything a normal marriage would do when we was dating only difference is we got engaged 3 monthes after dating and married in 2018 and been together altogether sense 2016 and we cook and clean for each other and help each other all the time. His mom living with us helped us alot more than it did without her being their although everything is regardless with her there or not she helped us with most of our arguments but even now everything is still great without her there and we have always knew how to work through our own arguments with or without her. However his mom does seem controlling and that will be a problem as my mother n law had respected our marriage and privacy and if yall can do what a relationship needs right now as dating and put each other before anybody else than it won’t happen while married. You have to be bf and gf before marriage and sometimes that includes cooking and cleaning to see if it’ll work out for marriage. My husband and I did what we’d do when we was dating and lived together before we got married to make sure it wouldn’t be a problem living with each other and we moved on with our life and still happy and everything is great and his mom and my family are our number one fans. Your bfs mom seems controlling and that won’t work so save the hurt and leave.
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You’re going to experience a mother in law from hell if you don’t put your foot down soon. Either leave or speak up, because I don’t see this ending very well
Leave now, because its only going to get worse. He is a mamas boy and hasn’t cut that umbilical cord yet.
Is the mom ill. Close to death. Handicapped. Why can’t she do these things?
I think you’re 100% correct in how you feel.
Red flags… would think about this real carefully…
Red flag now. Get out before you invest more time. 
Get out now, if she’s that interfering now, imagine what she’ll be like when you take her son away ( how she will see you getting married!)
The alarm bells are ringing. Walk away XXX
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Babe, do what your heart says, you already know the answer. Sending you strength and hugs. Be you my lovely x
this sounds like an episode of “I love a mama’s boy”…lol
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Run. That is a whole lot of issues you do not want to subscribe to honey.
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Move on…just save yourself the pain and stress…move on
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Leave him with his momma to cook n clean for him and go find one who’s independent and not a momma’s boy 
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Girl you see the flags. Get out. Let him be with mom.
Run.
Run fast.
You don’t cook and clean for someone you don’t live with. Maid services do that:roll_eyes:
The mom has serious attachment issues. He has boundary issues and won’t say no to mom. That’s not going to change - no matter what he says you will always come in second to his mom.
Did I mention RUN???
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No way! You are not his maid!
Control control control… get out of That!
Tell him to fuck right off. Huge red flags here.
Find another boyfriend
Quick mammas boy !
Run as fast as you can. 
Pack up n leave honey, been there done that… it’s gonna get way worse.
Doesn’t matter if you are or are not his WIFE. You are not his MOM! If that’s what he wants, then he can go live with her. This whole thing has too many red flags to count
If he can’t cut the cord from his mom the best thing for you to do is run.
Sis RUN. Those red flags aren’t a carnival, it’s a shit show.
Run it won’t get better. Imagine when you have kids 
mother in law from hell right there
Leave him to keep breastfeeding from his mummy and find yourself a man.
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You are right . Simple as that !
leave that mamas boy NOW. he will NEVER change and you will NEVER be happy
You need 2 run from him and very far away . these mommy boys are toxic
He needs to the cut the apron strings if he wants a future with you.
His mom is just using him because he is the easiest option to manipulate… I gave birth to you so pay my bills
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You would be the GUEST in his house. Since when do guests clean or cook for anyone?
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It sounds like you know what to do and are on the right track. Unfortunately not everyone is ready to grow at the same pace. However, you sound very mature and like you have a good head on your shoulders. You’re making the right decision.
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He sounds like he’s on the tit still and won’t be able to get off of it unless you do what she does so I’d just move on now if I were you
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sounds like she wants you to be able to cook & clean FOR HER. 
ew, i’m sorry but it’s always super weird when any parent acts like this with THEIR CHILD. like are you dating them? do you went to be dating them??? they’re an adult, why are you treating them like a child, as an adult??? it’s really weird honestly!
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You obviously don’t know just how hectic it can be to have such a demanding mother or family, I’m like that with my mother, I’m 34.
You don’t know everything about their relationship nor their situations.
Maybe, like me his mother doesn’t like being a roommate in someone else’s home & maybe she does need help to get her own place.
Ive just upped and left a whole life behind to move back to my home town, living back home with my mum after 17 years because my mum needed me.
Shed asked me for a year at least and it took me a long time to make that decision for my kids and I… It’s not exactly the most easiest decision, especially when there’s someone else making it harder by giving them ultimatums etc, for me it was my kids, same sh!t different situation.
I chose my mum, it’s called respect and doing the right thing.
I’m not surprised he’s back and forward, it’s a fuckin hard decision to make.
However on the butting in thing and expecting you to clean when y’all ain’t even living together ain’t gonna fly either.
Different story if you where living together
U can’t like him to much if u won’t cook for him…
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you don’t need that drama!!! if he wants to go w/ mommie" tell him by boy…you deserve someone way better then that
You will NEVER get between a man and his mama. So you need to realize that now.
I’m
Proud of you for standing up
Pfft you ain’t his mum so don’t treat him like a baby and cook and clean for him
Sounds like boyfriend wants a mom in his life, that cooks, clean and he can’t sleep with 
Make like Forrest Gump and run girl 
Never date a Mummas boy and tell that mum to stfu and go live by herself
Babe leave. So much heartbreak you will get trying to make a man happy that is already made happy by his mum. She will cook and clean him right into her house for life. Run. You don’t have to cook and clean as rule of happiness in a relationship that women is lonely and dependant on her children for life.
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Run. If you want to see how bad it can get, watch I Love a Mama’s Boy on TLC.
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Nope because his gonna get used to it and there will be a day when u don’t feel up to it
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If you plan to marry and have children with this man then i wonder how she would be with the children her grandchildren, parenting is hard enough without interfering in laws, if shes already opinionated about your distant relationship thus would worry me xx
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Yeah… this isn’t a relationship that you’ll want. He is trying to satisfy his mom’s needs and desires. It might actually be him to be honest. I think most guys probably wouldn’t even say anything about any of the ridiculous things that their mom says unless they truly hope you’ll just start doing whatever they suggest to try to win over the parent. You need to leave this situation and just understand that you will have some hurt feelings, but it will be better than feeling run down, competing with a mom, and being full of resentment.
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Hell No, run now while you can. Ive come from a similar situation. That’s HUGE red flags. You’re his partner, youre a team. You’re not his mum, his babysitter or his maid. He’s a grown ass man he needs to learn to look after himself. It’s your relationship not hers, it’ll get worse if you have children.
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I had the best mother in law who treated me like her own daughter,but unfortunately she passed away 2months back. Good souls don’t stay for so long
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You were right to set your boundaries. Be prepared to follow up if he won’t respect them. If it happens now, as a dating couple, it will only be worse if you ever cohabitate, marry, or have children together.
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You are right you should be his only concern your not married you don’t live togeather you don’t need to be cooking n cleaning for him more should his mother every now n then maybe but not all the time
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You just started dating a few months ago and you told him he can’t live with his mom? Wtf? If you have your own place, then he can come stay with you when you guys want privacy.
I think you guys have bigger problems than his mother saying you need to “cook” for him.
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RUNNNN!!! I’VE BEEN THERE DONE THAT. My ex lived with his mom they refinanced the house together. He eventually moved in with me but for a week!!! He took his stuff and moved back with his mom. We made it past that but one day we were messing around and she walked in. I kid you not…I WAS NO LONGER ALLOWED TO GO UPSTAIRS TO HIS ROOM!! 35 YEARS OLLLLLDDDD!!! I jumped ship. 6 years of my life wasted! We argued about him refinancing the house in his name . I asked him what about when we decide to buy a house together. His excuse " I need to help my mom she won’t make it in her own." My suggestion why not sell it and buy a smaller house she can afford. 4 bed 2 bath for one older lady. Made sense to down size. Nope they refused so I said 
Good luck making your decision.
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Tell him he needs to get himself and his mother’s situation together before u decide to do anything. Also, if u do decide to stay in a relationship with him his mother needs to stay out of it.
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If you truly love him, move cross country to begin your marriage together. I’m still happily married after 37 years but have no relationship with his Mom. Oh the stories l could tell. Luckily, even though l’m soft spoken, l inherited my Daddy’s temper and Always spoke up when it came to my children until they became adults. Good luck and God bless you!!
Moms and sons…dads and daughters are great…true love is about each other…we never completely abandon our parents,…but true love is about giving one’s all to the one they love and will plan to spend their entire life with…
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Run before she the mother in law from hell you can’t get rid of
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If ever there was a red flag, this would be it. RUN!
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You’re 100% right. Run away now before it gets worse😬
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Find someone else your definitely not being respecting.
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Big nope. Leave before you step into THAT mess
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RUN!! his mother sounds like a narcissist and it’ll never change or get better
Contact 211 in your state, find out all local resources available to you especially a counselor for your situationship. Always make the best decisions for yourself❤️!!
No, you are not wrong, trust yourself. You already know what your future will be like if you go against what you know to be true. Hold your ground and follow through with what needs to be done. It will save you much distress later on.
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He’s a momma’s boy and with my experience it’s awful! They typically have a hard time staying in a relationship from what I’ve seen. So don’t let them invalidate your feelings! Get the hell out of there while you can or don’t move in with him.
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Unless she’s old as dirt, there’s no reason a grown man needs to live with his mother. 
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Not wrong. Get a life
Let him date his mama since she’s so involved in the relationship
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Seriously just stop talking to him.
He will move on.
Focus on your school. Focus on your life and sticking to your morals
BECAUSE once you bend once, you will be doing gymnastics for a boy until you have post traumatic stress
Ask me how I know.
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Leave or you’ll be on the next season of “ I Love A Mama’s Boy” on TLC 
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No way. I understand looking after an elderly parent…my brother lives very close to our mom; he and his son look in on her every day and make sure she has what she needs. But they do not live with her, nor would she want that. Sounds like this duo wants an unpaid housekeeper. Move on, nothing to be gained here.
You’re doing the right thing
Mom is clearly grooming him toward them moving in together. If he wants someone to cook and clean at his house, he has two hands, and it’s HIS house, where HE lives. Not yours. If mom is so awesome, let her do it. He’s her child, not yours. You dont dont do wife things if you’re not a wife… you were absolutely right! Mom is clearly manipulating him to get in between y’all. And he’s too stupid to see it. I’d have said the same thing you did. There’s no way I’d be ok with him and mommy moving in together. Especially because you know, if shes willing to manipulate him like this now, she is going to do everything in her power to make sure that that situation stays the same. Especially as it pertains to her staying in the same house. She will constantly dangle that in front of him like a carrot if she owns the house, or even partially owns it and use it against him to get what she wants. This is a bad idea. She definitely would meddle in your relationship like she is now, because not allowing a girl to get close enough to him means their dynamic would stay the same. Let him stay single. He clearly has some more growing up to do.
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You’re not wrong, get out of that relationship as quickly as you got into it.
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You are not wrong. I wish I had done the same. Be proud
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You’re right. Stick to your statement.
Are you so desperate that you let them treat you this way, walk away now, they are playing you.
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You don’t want any part of that. Find someone else.
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It’s hard on the heart…but for just a while…you know this outcome
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You are not wrong in this keep family out of your relationship
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Leave him with his mommy, you deserve better…
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If you do wife shit without that ring they’ll take advantage and you’ll likely never get the ring. Gotta earn that wifey behavior, which also would me he is always doing what’s best for your relationship and the growth of that, he needs to be doing husband shit if he wants the wife treatment.
Just like he don’t pay ur bills, u don’t pay his and until u r his wife don’t give ultimatums
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You are in the right
Get a new boyfriend. Lot of red flags
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I’ve been married 30 years of the almost 50 I’ve been alive and I don’t cook or clean for anyone but my children. Your boyfriend is a grown ass man and can take care of himself. I can not stress this enough before you move in or have children with someone you need to discuss your expectations in all aspects of your relationship. Let him live with his mama and you can find a real man to have an adult relationship with.
Living with his mother is a bad idea. Also, even if you WERE his wife, you’re not obligated to cook and clean for him. He’s a grown man who is capable of doing these things for himself. Cooking for your spouse should be something you do because you WANT to, not because you’re obligated to. If you’re also working outside of the home, it is BOTH man and woman’s responsibility to clean, shop and cook. Sounds like she’s trying to adopt out her grown man child to be honest.
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You should probably run now
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Pretty much same as above. It’ll hurt hun, but you do not want to be in that mess.
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